Unmarried man for divorcee? - Page 2

Originally posted by: tinoo

Outside of India, yes it is possible.

Within India, I dont know if it is possible within an arranged marriage context, but it is certainly possible in a love marriage context ... because the person has access to the person behind the divorcee tag...and while spending time with the person can see the qualities of the lady, and her caring nature and many other aspects of her inner persona.

From a guy's perspective, I dont think there is really any difference between a divorcee and a non-divorcee ... except for the mental barrier of knowing that his love interest was once intimate with another man ... this is an individual decision about whether he can live with that aspect...

Shiv isnt overly concerned with anandi's virginity (atleast they havent shown him to be so) ... and so then all that remains is anandi's personality which he really loves ...

Originally posted by: -ASTHA-

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Its hard to find gal like anandi but still he should have done some investigation.

Originally posted by: nniks

It depends on person...nowdays lot of people dont mind marrying divorcee if they r in love...one of my close frn got divorced within 2 years of her marriage ...later on she remarried ...this guy was unmarried...they r very happy together n her divorcee status was never an issue.it depends how broad minded a person is.
in anandi's case shiv is impressed by her goodness n he is very sensible and rational man so he is ignoring her divorcee status for greater happiness

Btw my frn's 2nd marriage was arranged marriage...her 1st failed marriage was love.
I really applud her husband's family for being so broad minded.

I am married and i have a child...i dont knw if you would call me a backword woman..but if god forbid i have to divorce my husband then, i am sure i will never marry second time. Not because i dont want to give love a second chance but because it may affect my child's life. As mentally she will be confused with the new 'father' and later she might have to face community embarrassment /pressures as her mother married second time and if i have new baby frm the second husband then my first child would feel insecure.

Second reason is that if i decide to marry i will marry on a divorcee and not a fresh/single man..as then i will always have the inferiority complex for him. I will always feel that he would have definitely got better single (unmarried) person. He is doing me a big favor by marrying me. I am also not sure how his family would react to getting married to a divorcee. I feel i would be unwelcomed on his family.

Love is something which is more related to heart and if you see a person who is guinine, good at heart and meeting all your expectations and so adorable like the Anandi charector.. why not Shiv or any unmarried person will not fall for her...

Originally posted by: AshBendre

I am married and i have a child...i dont knw if you would call me a backword woman..but if god forbid i have to divorce my husband then, i am sure i will never marry second time. Not because i dont want to give love a second chance but because it may affect my child's life. As mentally she will be confused with the new 'father' and later she might have to face community embarrassment /pressures as her mother married second time and if i have new baby frm the second husband then my first child would feel insecure.

Second reason is that if i decide to marry i will marry on a divorcee and not a fresh/single man..as then i will always have the inferiority complex for him. I will always feel that he would have definitely got better single (unmarried) person. He is doing me a big favor by marrying me. I am also not sure how his family would react to getting married to a divorcee. I feel i would be unwelcomed on his family.

Originally posted by: gun_k

Ash, that's your POV and I really respect it however in reality when you are faced with such a situation the way things happen are far more different. I myself remarried after a anandi like situation in first marriage( of course it wasn't bal vivah and i had a love marriage) and I wasnt in a mood for remarriage but i met my husband and we became really good friends and with time we became closer and gradually fell in love but i was also scared of remarriage initially but my hubby convinced me to give our love a chance. We got married and are very happyand have a daughter . I never felt that i should not be his first choice just because he was unmarried and I am glad that i made the decision to marry the seond time.

In our extended family there is a cousin who was unmarried and wed a widow with an eight year old son and they are very happy too and have anothor son now and i don't see any disparity between both the sons ,in fact my cousin adopted the first one legally with both family's consent and they are a lovely family.

👏👏 thats really nice of your cousin dear.. and very happy that you found ur perfect soul mate..

i just think how the child who has divorced parents would feel as he/she has a new father and then a new sibling. The child from previous marriage would always feel somewhere in the heart that i dont have my real father but my sibling has both real father and mother. somewhere this would defintely make a home in the child's heart . the child may not say anything but it will surely remain in the heart and might make him/her sad.

Whereas if i remain single and divorced my child would hav a security that he has a mother only for him/her...when it comes to my happiness and love ..well i am ready to sacrifice anything for the happiness of my child.

But this are just my thoughts..god knws what i'll really do if such a situation happens in my life...i usually follow my heart...but for my child i will try to follow my mind..

Originally posted by: AshBendre

👏👏 thats really nice of your cousin dear.. and very happy that you found ur perfect soul mate..

i just think how the child who has divorced parents would feel as he/she has a new father and then a new sibling. The child from previous marriage would always feel somewhere in the heart that i dont have my real father but my sibling has both real father and mother. somewhere this would defintely make a home in the child's heart . the child may not say anything but it will surely remain in the heart and might make him/her sad.

Whereas if i remain single and divorced my child would hav a security that he has a mother only for him/her...when it comes to my happiness and love ..well i am ready to sacrifice anything for the happiness of my child.

But this are just my thoughts..god knws what i'll really do if such a situation happens in my life...i usually follow my heart...but for my child i will try to follow my mind..

yeah you do have a point and i guess it will take a lot of maturity on everyone's part to kind of reassure the child and i hope nothing so untoward will happen to you and you will always remain happy.

very good question 👏i think it depends on luck sometimes you get but alas many a times don't .this is a big problem ...and a lot unequailty in males and females as divorced males i don't really think face much problem to find an unmarried girl but females really do a lot ..in real life not every divorcee or balika vadhu can have shiv standing at her door one day like Anandi

it is not possible in families where parents decide marriage and boys just follow them...