JETSAR TIMES: terrorist activities in Jetsar

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Arunima

@arunima_LUIT

Dazzler

Posted: 13 years ago

#101

🤣

Amzing just amazing

@antara:

Its super funny the way Ghora sa is upset with the new collector . bechara his name was maligned .

Temperatures will soar more in Jetsar as Shivraj jee is indeed very very hot .☺️☺️

@pjyo : wow great pic

n ghode ke upar gadha ...😆😆😆

but donkeys r sweet n simple, dumb by nature ,😆 they could feel insulted. Better call jagat a magarmachch or crocodile .

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tanya_mitra

@tanya_mitra

Beginner

Posted: 13 years ago

#102

Uproar in the Animal Kingdom

Following Chetak's comparison of a certain Mumbai based Chulha Chaukewala with a gadha ,all species of animals, birds and insects have lodged a complaint with the Animal Rights Association. They find the comparison highly derogatory. 'Even a gadha serves his purpose and never betrays the master! !' their spokes person said.He further added that no future comparison of Mr and Mrs Pothead with any member of the association will be tolerated and strict action will be taken against defaulters.

However, the absence of Machchar Association during the event has raised some eyebrows. Confirmed sources say that the former refused to take part in the event as it goes against their rules.

In a press meet later in the day, Machchar Association Spokesperson said "Our basic purpose in life is 'khoon choosna' which we must do at all circumstances.We find that a strong similarity exists in our motto in life and the lifestyle of the Chulha-Chaukewala and his Modern Biwi. Therefore our whole hearted support lies with the Mumbai based couple and we have decided to stay away from this controversy." He also said that after the property demand issue in Jaitsar, their committee is planing to arrange a special felicitation ceremony for Mr and Ms Pot-heads and present them with their highest reward- The Extreme Blood Sucking Parasite Award. The preparations of the ceremony are now underway and the date shall be announced shortly.

Edited by tanya_mitra - 13 years ago

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tweetie19

@tweetie19

Dazzler

+ 9

Posted: 13 years ago

#103

Originally posted by: tanya_mitra
He also said that after the property demand issue in Jaitsar, their committee is planing to arrange a special felicitation ceremony for Mr and Ms Pot-heads and present them with their highest reward- The Extreme Blood Sucking Parasite Award.

🤣🤣 Excellent 😆😆
😆

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woman11

@woman11

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

#104

Originally posted by: tanya_mitra

In a press meet later in the day, Machchar Association Spokesperson said "Our basic purpose in life is 'khoon choosna' which we must do at all circumstances.We find that a strong similarity exists in our motto in life and the lifestyle of the Chulha-Chaukewala and his Modern Biwi. Therefore our whole hearted support lies with the Mumbai based couple and we have decided to stay away from this controversy." He also said that after the property demand issue in Jaitsar, their committee is planing to arrange a special felicitation ceremony for Mr and Ms Pot-heads and present them with their highest reward- The Extreme Blood Sucking Parasite Award. The preparations of the ceremony are now underway and the date shall be announced shortly.

LOL LOL hahahahahaha too funny🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

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woman11

@woman11

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

#105

JETSAR TIMES

Terrorist activities in Jetsar

For the past few days several public places of Jetsar have been targeted by terrorist groups. Important buildings and structures of Jetsar---like the girls' school, farmland canals, panchayat office, a wing of the hospital, ration office, cold storages etc have been targets of mild blasts. The police are completely baffled by the blasts specifically because the blasts are not done to create major damage or complete destruction of these structures, but rather to cause very minor harm. "We are very confused about the nature of the blasts. Usually terrorist groups want to kill people and completely destroy the buildings. But these blasts are very mild in impact, were caused when there were no people around so nobody is hurt and only the buildings are in need of minor renovations, nothing else", said the baffled SI of Jetsar. The chief minister of Rajasthan has however claimed that the blasts were originally targeted to send him a message, since he was in Jetsar a few days back. "The blasts are certainly caused by Pakistani terrorist groups, they want to topple our government. But we will not give up without a fight." said an angry chief minister.

In the meantime, Jetsar's Sarpanch bitiya and new Collector have promised the people that they will renovate and repair the structures as soon as possible. Both have been working together relentlessly and been spending almost 20 hours of the day with each other to bring things back to normalcy as soon as possible. Seeing their hard work, dadisa has offered Shiv to stay in the haveli so that he can be with Anandi for more time and finish the work faster. Since then Shiv is staying in the haveli, working all day with Anandi and having his meals at the Singh place. Strangely enough, dadisa has returned to her strict dadisa mode and making Anandi do all the cooking for Shiv. With Sumitra gone, neither does dadisa herself cook anything,nor does she allow Gehna to cook for Shiv. Sources say that Shiv relishes every dish that Anandi makes and has gained 5 pounds since he moved to the haveli. Shiv's car has also mysteriously stopped working, so Shiv has been traveling in Anandi's jeep together all over Jetsar. Strangely enough, Anandi's old clothes have also vanished that Anandi found all new, expensive clothes in her cupboard one fine morning. However, Anandi has not bothered too much about the strange things in the haveli and is working hard to help out Jetsar's people.

In the meantime, our secret sources got hold of a villager who might have information about the blasts. The man named Banshi Lal had gone to the fields to check on his crops on the night of the blast and claims to have seen two figures supposedly setting up the blast. He claims he could not see clearly but one of the terrorists looked like a thin man with turban and mooch and the other terrorist looked like an old woman with traditional Rajasthani attire and pallu. He claimed that the woman is probably the leader of the terrorist group as she was the one giving orders to the turbaned man, occasionally screaming "thari bhali hove" and scolding the other man. The police are still searching for an old woman and her accomplice, a thin, moustached, turban wearing man. If anyone has any information about this deadly terrorist group, please call the police helpline.

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Niveditha

@NiVu-mjht1

Navigator

Posted: 13 years ago

#106

the terrorists names are kalyani devi n makkhan kaka... n they stay in the badi haveli... of jetsar...

informer...
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i was first wondering who is this thin man with a moustache n turban... after wondering for hours i have finally found out...lol..😃😆😆😆
😆😆😆😆
jetsar times is so funny 😆😆😆😆😆😆😆

Edited by NiVu-mjht1 - 13 years ago

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RavishinRavzy

@RavishinRavzy

Inactive

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#107

Hot news of today-

Latest update-First for the readers of Jetsar times.

By the details given by informer,police got suspicious of two persons as our readers also did.They are- Kalyani devi/DS of badi haveli and Her servant -makkhan kaka.

They hesitated to approach her-remembering her past-and also fearing that she may even blast their Police Station.

When collector saab and Sarpanch bitiya of Jetsar questioned about their worried faces-they said the names of the people who they are suspecting.By listening to their names even Collector hesitated a bit but Sarpanch -Anandi being close relative to DS(the suspected culprit) spoke to everyone's surprise that-"Everyone is equal in the eyes of law"-which impressed Shiv,the collector.The very much impressed collector(may be due to Anandi's words),the very much disappointed Sarpanch(may be due to DS's actions) and the very much tensed police(may be due to their night mares of DS)-reached BADI HAVELI.

When DS,and entire family along with Makkhan-listened to the reason for their arrival-all the family members are shoked except Makkhan who is profusely sweating and looked a bit tensed and DS who is laughing as if -

her once-upon- a -time relative Jagdish and no-time-relative-Gowri-have fallen in a muddy pond full of crocodiles.All-including Makkhan are a bit surprised by her behaviour.When she is asked about the reason of her laughing-

She asked that -how can she commit such a big crime when she is still a growing kid who even doesn't know how to fire a cracker.

All are tensed thinking that -If Jagdish's remarriage matter had made her human,did Anandi's matter of remarriage had made her insane?(Except Makkhan -who seemed to be a bit relieved from tension)

After coming out from the shock,Police had turned towards Makkhan who is also thought to be a part of the crime---- whose reply has left them all with no words.

He told that he was still under the impression of Bhang which he had on Holi day that made him move from guest room to all other rooms in the house."May be you all hukooms are also under the impression of Bhang that you think you saw those people doing crime-who are really very very innocent as kids",he added.

As this is an exclusive news and we have no reporters available currently to update the news faster than those of other magazines-we approached our new reporter RAVZ,who is very new to this profession,and doesn't know how to update in an impressible way,

We apologize to all our readers for small editing errors.Hope you understand.😊

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Suchi-

@Suchi-

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#108

VERYYY NICEEE I can sooo imagine DS pulling such stunts to keep AnSH together

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tinoo

@tinoo

Rocker

Posted: 13 years ago

#109

NEW LAUNDROMAT SERVICES IN JAYETSAR

astute reporter ANjana XYZ noted that shiv has a dirty shirt problem

1. first shirt dirty by rescuing anandi from horse carriage.

2. second shirt dirty by pushing wheel out of sludge.

3. third shirt dirty because of mango splooshing on it.

Makhan and co. are considering opening a second business - a laundromat. Even if the collector is their sole customer they are assured of getting good business and making a tidy profit. 😛