Is it just me or - Page 2

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642126 thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
#11

Originally posted by: bmadhu2006

Hello Annika, if you have to hire a person for a Programmer Analyst position, will you show interest in a guy with Bachelors+4 Years of Exp / Masters+1 Yr exp? 4 Years of experience guy will have more exposure. In the same way Anandi because of her child marriage experienced so many things and Gauri has no such experience. The only experience she has is betrayal. So, she thinks that it is the only problem in world. But our well experienced Anandi has seen almost each and every corner of life. It is not to prove that educated girls are of loose / questionable character. Gauri took such a step just because of lack of experience. Coming to uniting JaAn, CVs showed the ill effects of child marraige and explained the legalities of child marraiges. At the same time, they will show the mahaantha of Indian marriage system.

Coming to Jagya, he is the most confused and cunning person I have ever seen. He is in the first night room with Gauri, but thinking about the days with Anandi. He loves Anandi, but he don't know and realized that and he was attracted to Gauri as she is upto his expectations (salwar kameez, education, modern thinking etc). But she is not suitable for his attitude. Because both of them have the same attitude of dominating people. So, two like minds won't stay together. That is why whenever they come close, there will be a big fight between them. I think Gauri will be separated and do some samaj seva and will marry that NRI guy after bade papa convincing him. I think we have watch this serial at least for coming 6 months.
I hope CVs gives a happy ending to Balika Vadhu...


Please do not misunderstand me. I am not upholding superiority of educated girls. Both rural background girls as well as educated or modern girls have their own strengths.

But I am really against character assassination and stereotypical representation of educated girls and even city people in general.

I would have equally protested if they had tried to show that village girls are silly or dumb. I hated Jagya when he used to call Anandi gawar!

I am against bias and stereotyping of ANY kind.

I am not just talking about Gauri's marriage to Jagya. But also her impatient behaviour or shouting at villagers or things like throwing away money given as gift/shagun by DS etc. They stripped her of her sensibility to make Anandi look mahaan and Gauri look like a vamp or really unfit for marriage.

What experience are you talking about? From your post, sorry to say, it seems that child marriage is after all okay, since it gives experience and wisdom over time, from a young age and makes a girl befitting marriage material.

There are majority of women in the world today, who have no experience of marriage. So does it mean they will make bad wives or useless DILs?

I only say repeatedly that they ought to show real issues related to child marriage, actual harsh realities and why people call child marriage a social evil and why the judiciary made it illegal! If it were so simple then it would not be made illegal!

I also protest why they show it only from a woman's POV and why they have ruined character of Jagya. Even boys suffer due to this child marriage thing. Guys as young as 14-15 have a wife and 2-3 kids to look after! Even if they don't have kids, they suffer due to burden of expectations - career, taking care of family, handling marriage etc. from a very young age. Their choices and freedom also gets limited.

But yes boys suffer less than girls. Still they do suffer. And that suffering or problem has not been shown in BV. They've just shown Jagya as another wayward, spoilt boy and made it all look like routine adultery or straying.

I am not saying Anandi is less suitable for Jagya or Gauri is more suited. I only say why make Gauri lose her sense? Especially when she is from the same rural background and has also suffered due to child marriage as a kid? How could she allow her life to be ruined like this? How could she not think about her self respect and buy J's lies and live as a keep? How come she did not consult her family and especially her mentor Bade Papa? She was sensible and nice earlier. Why make her look insane in haveli and village and a total vamp in front of Anandi?

She was not bad or haughty to begin with.

What each and every corner of life has Anandi seen? She has only lived in village. Rarely stepped out of house or gone out of DS', Bhairon's or her parents' gaze. She never even attended school after the age of 9 and whatever education she got, she got it privately and was only allowed to sit for exams. She has had zilch experience of outside world.

She had dreamy notions about life till this reality hit her hard, shook her and made her and the whole Singh family see reality of the world.

Gauri's experiences are not just limited to education, but she also knows harsh realities of life. She was almost sold as a kid to DS, her marriage broke, she was made to suffer all due to DS and her own parents' greed. She's seen life in Mumbai too, living alone, meeting deserted women like Kunda Tai etc.

Experience is not just limited to home, it also includes the world and includes experience of harsh realities too.

And what LACK of experience are you talking about? You mean she needed prior experience of married life for this? Sir/madam, she has not got betrayed now. She got betrayed in the name of marriage as a kid only. So she knows how it feels when you're rejected or deceived!

It is pitiable that they did not show her use that experience in the sense that she should not let herself be ruined by the same man and same family again.

The way you're talking about Gauri, sorry to say, it feels you think her parents did the wrong thing by giving her freedom and letting her study further or live on her own.

It is beliefs like these - that educated or modern girls are not marriage material, or child marriage gives experience of marriage and trains them to be good wives from a young age, too much freedom need not be given to girls, training a girl to be a beendni is more important than helping her stand on her feet - which this show is propagating now. The nature of ''pro-Anandi'' and basically ''pro-JaAn'' arguments from your side show exactly what I have always tried to say in all my posts in this forum.

They have handled child marriage with kid gloves, never shown its actual gross realities and shown that the only issue they face is underage pregnancy. Rest all, is okay, rather good for family!

They must show at least one child marriage fail in the serial if they are really against child marriage or believe it is a social evil.

How can they show happy child marriages? So it means judiciary made it illegal aise hi? They made laws so that it gets more work for lawyers and gives them rozi roti? For no solid reason? NGOs are still fighting it? Why? Just for timepass or publicity?

Why do you say two like minds cannot stay together? Again distorted view. There are many couples in real life, who are career-oriented, doctors, lawyers, even film stars, tutors, scientists etc. There is Akshay Kumar who has an equally successful interior designer wife Twinkle Khanna. There is example of Marie and Pierre Curie. There are so many examples of husband-wife working for rival companies and still living happily with each other! Even in history we have examples of Jahangir living very happily with wife Noorjahan and letting her take over and see matters of state and politics. How come a fiercely independent and revolutionary minded Manu (Rani Laxmibai), made a wonderful wife to King Gangadhar and an inspirational queen for Jhansi?

What about Narayana and Sudha Murthy? Isn't Sudha Murthy also equally qualified, an academic, a writer, social worker, educator and speaker? I am sure she also has a mind of her own. Or look at equally ambitious, opinionated and individualistic Aamir Khan & Kiran Rao? Aren't they happy as life partners and even as partners in profession?

Many couples, ordinary and famous, in history and real life, in India and other countries are there who are ambitious, career-minded and have a mind of their own. It's not like all their marriages break or are full of khit-pit!

You mean men should always marry a woman who is not ambitious or less educated or is easily subjugated? And women should always marry an easy-going, easy to control man if they are ambitious themselves. [As the aspiring doctor Sarika married a sweetoo and less educated boy in Beendh Banoonga Ghodi Chadhunga show!]

Is Gauri's self respect actually ego? See how she handles uncooperative colleagues, unruly principals or landlords. She is so calm with them, even bends, asks for forgiveness and offers to make extra efforts and commits never to give them a chance to complain again.

She is not a b*tch per se! That is why I was pained to see why they made her behave like crazy when it came to Anandi.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Don't think I am against Anandi or glorifying or justifying Gauri. I see what Gauri did was wrong. But I only protest why they made her do so, considering her original nature and background.

I am not saying only educated people are great. But don't show them so bad or callous also! It's outright stereotypical.
Please do not take my post personally. But your post exactly showed what stereotypes this show is reinforcing. Sorry if I sound offending.😔
Edited by annika20 - 14 years ago
tanvismile thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#12
i agre with anika POV Bt just got point out one thing < i dnt mean dat a gal only should be best beedhni n nt study>for example an office wen a gal is new ,she finds her job tough bt later she becomes expert.similarly balika vadhu starting finds it tough bt later gets very wel adjusted.we educated women ,we dotake care of families bt if u see nowdays there r lot of nuclear families.so just imagine a gal ,who is receiving hatred,compared with other again n again,finds herself alone with everyone on the other side,targeted by villagers.Wont the person get frustated.
ankit111 thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#13
@Tanvi, u tell me who created tht frustrating situation??? suppose she married with Jogia, out of love, forgiving her all cheating and even being selfish in the name of love😉 but why she forced Jogia to go to the village, whn he clearly told tht no one is waiting thm there. but she assured tht whtever will happen, she will not do any shikayat, but soon after reaching there she started blaming everyone and proving herself rit. do u expect after this anyone wd hv any respect for her?? thn again, suppose she wanted to get Ashirwaad (we never seen such attitude of a people who want only Ashirwaad and acceptance😆, even after knowing tht everybody is against the marriage and hv disowned their only son), thn whn she realised tht mission ashirwaad is impossible, why she stick there, even suppose tht DS forced her, but soon she realised tht DS was doing only drama, but still she stick there, aur to aur sabko khoz khoz ke apna ratta speach marti thi😆😆😆 doing romance in Chane ke khet, with her open silky hairs, without pallu. so whn u invite problem for urself, thn why to blame other for frustrating situation and why we sd understand her situation. if she wd hv married with Jogia and didnt poke in others life, i think it wd hv been acceptable in some extend, but she not only did mistake of marrying with a cheater but made the others life hell along with her own😆😆
642126 thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
#14
@Tanvi

I agree with Ankit on this. How can we sympathise with her frustration. The fact that she will not be welcome there was a given! Jagya had warned her in advance and kept telling her she won't get anything out of it!

Ab yeh toh koi baat nahin huyi na ki sab kuch jaante huye bhi dul-dul mein paon rakh diya, aur jab dul-dul mein dhasne lagey, toh chillaana shuru kar diya ki yeh kya ho raha hai, kyun ho raha hai, mein neeche kyon jaa rahi hoon, zameen ko kya ho gaya?

She is not comparable to a newly recruited worker or a newly married woman in general situation. She married a married man - she did not consult or inform the boy's family and came out of nowhere (for them). So it is NATURAL that they would behave like that!!

People don't take it kindly if their boy or girl does not inform or consult them and just comes in shaadi ka joda with a husband or wife of their choice, saying humne shaadi kar li humein aashirwad de do! Even in urban areas, in case of adult marriages too, people are very sensitive about such matters. And such boys and girls have a tough time to convince their respective parents or get acceptance.

Singhs would have behaved with her that way even if child marriage was illegal (and they did too), because for them and in their culture it holds value.

Ab kya soch rahi thi woh? Ki jaate hi uska swagat hoga? Woh log usko apne bete ki pasand samajh kar uski aarti utarenge? Bas ekdum jaate hi acceptance mil jayegi?

Anyone would get shocked and flabbergasted if they see such a thing happen, so suddenly!

You always have same hollow reasoning for her - she was newly wed but they treated her like this and when this argument is thwarted and attributed to her own actions, you then bring up stuff like childhood trauma to give legitimacy to whatever she does! Kamaal hi hai!




tiny15 thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#15

@ankit and annika i completely agree wid u!!

G is an educated & had bad experience of selling by her own parents but still she chose the same bitter consequences 4 her!!🤢🤢🤢

she"ll never've my sympathy even if she begets the child & after that shes made 2 leave J by him or anyoder!! the prsn whether a gal or boy hampers or causes havoc in sum1 innocent & genuine prsn's life isn't worth of any iota of sympathy!!🥱🥱🥱
and yes 4 every action of G & J theres justificn or reason & resaon is marriagable age & rt 2 choice!! so then its my rt 2've all happiness & 4 it even if i've murder sum1 or make hell of sum genuine prsn's life then its fine!!wow !! wat a right!!🥱🥱🥱
G'd 4gotten that 2 get ur right 1st u've 2 do the duty but she1st wants her rt & then do the duty!! i can bet that if she'd accepted by singh family then she wud'd defntly made their life aliving hell by screaming & screaching "kyun-kyun"wenevr DS'd scolded her even 4 biggest mistake!!🥱🥱🥱
bmadhu2006 thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
#16

Originally posted by: tanvismile

i never felt til now j ever luved anandi,it was more of excitement between teenagers.n if show jaan together then wats the msg?if tomorow anandi tries to stop child mariges then the vilagers wil say u r nicely happy in ur life n wants to stop my daughter s wedding.is it nt the waste of al these 6 months watever we saw.nways my msg to everyone is just watch show ,relax,dnt analyse the future story bcoz dat wil cause tension n we wont be able to enjoy the episode.

This POV is also correct. Let us see how it goes...
chulbuli7 thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#17

Originally posted by: tanvismile

i never felt til now j ever luved anandi,it was more of excitement between teenagers.n if show jaan together then wats the msg?if tomorow anandi tries to stop child mariges then the vilagers wil say u r nicely happy in ur life n wants to stop my daughter s wedding.is it nt the waste of al these 6 months watever we saw.nways my msg to everyone is just watch show ,relax,dnt analyse the future story bcoz dat wil cause tension n we wont be able to enjoy the episode.


@Red: If Anandi and Jagya's love was out of teenage excitement, then Gauri and Jagya's relationship is a fruit of infatuation and adultery.

Common tell me, didn't Jagya grow up in the same household that Anandi did? Then how come that little girl understood her responsibilities as a beendni so well, and this fellow couldn't bother less about his responsibilities towards her??? He's been reckless and careless with Anandi, and will do the same with Gauri, no matter how much they love each other, at what age they got married (illegally), how well their thoughts match (read mismatch).
Missesha thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#18
I feel the story line is a complete mess at this stage. There is no synchronisation anywhere. Couldn't understand Gully's track today, I
mean why did have to introduce such topic? It was more of a filler to me. I feel the story is not moving at all, its the same thing again and again...

And honestly, I had different expectations in regards to Anandi's further studies, I wanted to see a strong G dumping J and I wanted to see J suffering, but nothing of that sort has really happened' so disappointed as well.
Snehabr thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#19
Wow...this is such a heated topic of discussion here..and a great post to start with..and even greater point of views.. I am guessing that BV is just showing that even though they say women are equal and have all rights how a man gets away just because of he being a man...no offense meant to any man or woman here!!.I think considering that Jagat said to Gauri that he is not responsible if she ruins her career..they probably will show that after Gauri loses her licence...Jagat love vanishes...I am just saying..I agree that the show has its sterotyped character explainations...The CVs are trying to cover too many areas in this serial...eve teasing, social service, social injustice, self centered youth, child marriage...if they probably try to focus on one topic at once..this wouldnt have been so frustrating to the audience.. its just an opinion!
Vr15h thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#20

Jagya and Anandi will get back together (as per the SBS Statement of Anandi) So thats all we have to look towards now.
Whether we like it or not.


Why? If they did that, what stupid moral would they have @ the end of the serial? That guys can be as obnoxious as they like, including re-marrying, but if they come back w/ folded hands, all is forgiven?

Sphere Origins did the right thing w/ Jyoti - getting Kabir to replace Pankaj. Even if they don't do that here, they should at least ensure that Anandi doesn't return to Jagya. If she does, it'll rival the endings of Jyoti (giving birth to Pankaj's 2nd kid), PKCM, Luteri Dulhan and GkD.

Atleast iam hoping NO JaAn reunion ever ,someday anandi moves on with her own


Yup, I too want that! Incidentally, are people finding this track boring? I'm happy that Anandi is teaching illiterate adults on modern things, like using a computer. I'd much rather see her do that than in the kitchen in her stupid ghunghat making chai for everybody, and pretending to be the bahu (or is it beti? Which one was it last?)

If Sphere Origins/Colors wants to recover their TRPs and can't stick on this message, then just get a new guy for Anandi and show a new romance b/w them. So that the doors on Jagya are well and truly slammed, regardless of what happens b/w him & Gauri.
Edited by _Vrish_ - 14 years ago

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