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One of television's most powerful personalities, and a favourite with the masses, Sakshi Tanwar says, 'I am an outsider in this whole circus. Even after 13 years in this industry, I feel like I don't belong here. I think there's more to life than just this!' She talks to Mohini Mehrotra about family, singlehood, the importance of "me-time" and the reel versus real Sakshi (With inputs from Gitikka Ganju Dhar)
Yes of course she's on time. I didn't expect anything else. Sakshi Tanwar is known to be considerate, soft-spoken, down-toearth - but meticulous and firm - and a powerhouse of talent. (Of all the special guests invited to be a part of Kaun Banega Crorepati, Sakshi was the most punctual; host, Amitabh Bachchan, is the other celebrity known to be always on time.) She walks into the room, sleepyeyed, wearing linen flare-out pants, a loose kurti and flip-flops. 'I was working till very late last night,' she explains. She is much slimmer than on camera, though.
The trademark effervescent smile that lights up the big, black eyes is unmistakable. Sakshi Tanwar is one of the most recognised faces on Indian television. It all started 13 years ago with the super-successful family soap, Kahaani Ghar Ghar Ki, after which she became a much-loved face in households across the country as Parvati, the perfect bahu. Mothers adored her and mothers-in-law gave her example as the epitome of the perfect daughterin-law. Today she is again on top of the charts with Bade Ache Lagte Hein (BALH), where she plays Priya. So who is the real Sakshi Tanwar? Read on to find out... Family Comes First Sakshi, 40, belongs to Alwar, a small town in Rajasthan, where she lived in a joint family. But because her father was in a transferable job, they would often be on the move across north India. 'All our holidays used to be in Alwar with our extended family,' she fondly recalls.
Sakshi, who has been in Mumbai for the past decade or so, has her parents living with her most of the time. She has a brother and a sister, but feels she's most pampered. 'Family is important to me. I am dependent on them for everything - from little things to big decisions, I consult them on a day-today basis. I feel it is always better to go back to a house full of people, than to four empty walls. It's great support system,' she says. Sakshi is not an openly emotional person but has a sentimental side. Her mother's picture hangs on the wall across her bed. 'That's the first thing I look at in the morning, and the last thing I do before I sleep is talk to her. She is my best friend, guide and guru. Her voice is my biggest stress-buster. She still pampers me by cooking for me when I am with her,' she says. "Knot" To Tie So does this superstar of the small screen feel the inevitable pressures to "settle down" and get married?
Sakshi replies firmly, 'My parents, like me, are very progressive and they believe that when I know it's the right time to do it, I will.' Sakshi recalls the time when her father set up a meeting with a prospective match, who asked her when she would stop working post marriage. The actor did not miss a beat and replied: 'When you stop working!' And that was the end of that. Of Rumours & Ram Kapoor Although Sakshi Tanwar-Ram Kapoor are one of the most liked on-screen couples in television for BALH, there has been plenty of media talk about their turbulent off-screen relationship. Rubbishing these rumours, Sakshi says, 'I have never had anything to complain of. We are both professional people and share a great on-screen camaraderie, and beyond that there is a lot of mutual respect. We are secure in our individual spaces.
If there was any rumour about any clash between us, it was baseless.' In fact Sakshi says that Ram is great to work with and that most of their scenes are impromptu, and go beyond the script. 'We are both spontaneous people and most of our bantering -the famous Ram-Priya bantering, if you've seen the programme - is mostly natural. If there was any rumour about any clash between us, it was baseless.' In fact Sakshi says that Ram is great to work with and that most of their scenes are impromptu, and go beyond the script. 'We are both spontaneous people and most of our bantering -the famous Ram-Priya bantering, if you've seen the programme - is mostly natural. At times we don't even refer to the script, and we go on and on, and then suddenly we look at the director and say, "Will you say cut please!" We would have finished the scene long back, but were enjoying it so much, that we didn't realise it was over!' she declares.
Thirteen & Going Strong
Sakshi started her career with Ekta Kapoor's (Balaji Telefilms Limited) Kahaani Ghar Ghar Ki. Thirteen years on and their association still holds strong, and she's ruling the roost again with the production houses' recent success BALH. The industry is abuzz about Ekta being a very difficult person to work with, so what is Sakshi's equation with her. 'Balaji (Ekta's production company) is like family now. It's not just a place where you go, work and come back. Ekta is professional and she's focused about what she wants. Yes she is a hard taskmaster! And why not? Anyone who's putting in the amount of dedication and hard work she is... If I were in her place, I would do the same.
If you are committed to a project or a show, you're expected to give in a certain number of hours of work and professionalism to make it successful. If you're not doing it, and somebody's pulling you up for it, then that's fair. But yes, she's definitely not what the media has portrayed her to be. On the contrary, she's a fun, chilled-out person. I guess because she's in the spotlight, everything associated with her is blown out of proportion,' she says. Away From The Mundane While most actors would have jumped at the chance to star in a Balaji project again, Ekta apparently took a while to convince Sakshi to play the character of Priya in BALH.
'After working dayin-day-out for eight years, I wanted to do nothing for a while - to wake up in the morning when I felt like it, and not have an agenda or POA for the day. When doing Kahaani for 8 years, I did work that most people would do in 16 years of their lives, because we were working on a daily, and there wasn't even one episode without me. It would be unfair to say I didn't get my holidays, but the holidays used to be rushed... I just wanted to laze around, go for a vacation and enjoy my "metime" activities... I wanted to be with family and friends, watch movies, and basically just put my feet up and relax and enjoy my time, my way. And I did that for two-and-a-half years,' says Sakshi, calling it one of the smartest moves in her life.
Considering so many lucrative opportunities were coming her way every day, didn't she feel anxious about losing out to newcomers and stardom? Admits Sakshi, 'It took guts to do "nothing". Yes I had doubts... but I was sure that I didn't want to do anything remotely similar to what I had already done... I was not growing as an actor.' Good Girl Gone Bad The actor ended her hiatus when she was offered something "challenging" - the role of Teepri in Balika Vadhu -an out-and-out negative character. Calling it a fabulous experience Sakshi says, 'I thought it was an important exercise for me to do an as actor. It was like a 180o turn.
It gave me a high, but made me realise that I needed to brush up my acting skills.' However, with Sakshi's earlier image being so positive and inspirational - almost holier-thanthou - this new avtaar didn't go down well with the audience, who never expected their favourite "bahu" to turn into a vamp. But the actor says that that will not deter her from taking up similar projects in future.
The Reel vs Real Sakshi
Coming to the two iconic roles that have made her one of mainstream television's popular actors - Parvati and Priya - who does the real Sakshi Tanwar relate to, and pat comes her reply, 'Definitely Priya in BALH! People in our country have this habit of binding a person by his/ her relationships. When I was Parvati - I was the ideal wife, bahu, bhabhi, and last came the fact that I was an individual. The good thing about Priya's character is that she speaks like a woman first, and then as a wife, mother, bhabhi, bahu and so on. Even in a recent track I did, Priya's sister-inlaw Natasha wanted to divorce her (Priya's) brother, and Priya supported her cause.' 'Why should a woman live with a man she's not happy with? This echoes the sentiments of the today's woman. And Priya (Sakshi's characher in BALH is today's woman - working, independent, late-marriage, single parenting, everything you see in a typical urban scenario is reflected in her character, which a lot of working women - both single and married, and I, can associate with,' she adds. Sakshi recalls incidents when women would come to her and tell her how their mothers-in-laws wanted them to be like Parvati. 'But today, from "I would like to be like her (like Parvati)", it's transitioned to, "I am like her! (like Priya)" That's a big change, and it's so refreshing to be real - to not always have perfectly styled hair or correct clothes or impeccable makeup and accessories,' she adds.
Most urban strapped as they are for time. Another thing the actor loves about her character in BALH is that she speaks her mind... much like Sakshi in real life. 'Whether to her in-laws or to her husband, to her own family or to outsiders, she's not the coy housewife who thinks that "yeh kehne se rishte tut jayenge" (If I say such things, relationships will get strained), which is so today, so me,' she says.
Let Life Surprise You
She's not planned anything for the future and believes that life is a journey, and one should take it as it comes. Candid about her stardom, she says, 'I didn't know I will be here, ever. Even with Kahaani, I used to think that I will do it for a year or two, and then be done with it. I am not very ambitious. I can't force myself to do something I am not in the mood for.' There was a time when acting was everything for Sakshi. She would go to the shoot early in the morning, and spend endless hours there, and then start thinking about the next day's shoot. But she believes that the break she took helped her put things in perspective. 'At that time, everyone was telling me that I was a "waster" because I was rejecting plump offers. But I knew that even if I don't get anything ever, I am sorted. Coming from where I did, and with the kind of ambition that I had, I didn't expect so much love, adulation and success.' Not many know that back in 2009, Sakshi starred in a movie called Coffee House opposite actor Ashutosh Rana, which didn't do too well. Ask her about any Bollywood plans, and she says that nothing's "on" for now.
A Star So Humble
Though deceptively low-profile and simple, Sakshi is confident. Yet, she's grounded too, notwithstanding the number of advertisements in her kitty, and more fame coming her way than several Bollywood stars. In fact Sakshi has shot for a record 15 commercials in the last 2 years. Recently, in a consumer survey, Sakshi featured in the top 5 "most trustworthy celebrities", along with Madhuri Dixit and Katrina Kaif, guaranteed to ensure the success of a product in the market. However, she says she understands the transient nature of her work well, and has no illusions of long-lasting grandeur.
'When doing Kahaani as the lead, I was very pampered by Balaji. And then I worked with another production house as a secondary character, and there the treatment was very different. So why was I getting that much importance in Balaji? Because I was the lead, not because I was Sakshi Tanwar. I understood this difference well. This is great, but only till it lasts!'
Did-You-Know
Sakshi Tanwar shares some interesting facts about herself. I am more of a music buff than a television person. I love Bollywood music, especially old Hindi songs. I love to travel, and make sure I do lots of two-day getaways from time to time. My last holiday was in Mizoram for seven days. It's beautiful and unadulterated by tourism. I am not fashion-conscious. For me, comfort comes first. But I love colour in my wardrobe. I enjoy cooking and don't employ a full-time maid. When I cook, and someone appreciates it, it gives me a high! My favourite films are Guide and Sholay
Yes of course she's on time. I didn't expect anything else. Sakshi Tanwar is known to be considerate, soft-spoken, down-toearth - but meticulous and firm - and a powerhouse of talent. (Of all the special guests invited to be a part of Kaun Banega Crorepati, Sakshi was the most punctual; host, Amitabh Bachchan, is the other celebrity known to be always on time.) She walks into the room, sleepyeyed, wearing linen flare-out pants, a loose kurti and flip-flops. 'I was working till very late last night,' she explains. She is much slimmer than on camera, though.
The trademark effervescent smile that lights up the big, black eyes is unmistakable. Sakshi Tanwar is one of the most recognised faces on Indian television. It all started 13 years ago with the super-successful family soap, Kahaani Ghar Ghar Ki, after which she became a much-loved face in households across the country as Parvati, the perfect bahu. Mothers adored her and mothers-in-law gave her example as the epitome of the perfect daughterin-law. Today she is again on top of the charts with Bade Ache Lagte Hein (BALH), where she plays Priya. So who is the real Sakshi Tanwar? Read on to find out... Family Comes First Sakshi, 40, belongs to Alwar, a small town in Rajasthan, where she lived in a joint family. But because her father was in a transferable job, they would often be on the move across north India. 'All our holidays used to be in Alwar with our extended family,' she fondly recalls.
Sakshi, who has been in Mumbai for the past decade or so, has her parents living with her most of the time. She has a brother and a sister, but feels she's most pampered. 'Family is important to me. I am dependent on them for everything - from little things to big decisions, I consult them on a day-today basis. I feel it is always better to go back to a house full of people, than to four empty walls. It's great support system,' she says. Sakshi is not an openly emotional person but has a sentimental side. Her mother's picture hangs on the wall across her bed. 'That's the first thing I look at in the morning, and the last thing I do before I sleep is talk to her. She is my best friend, guide and guru. Her voice is my biggest stress-buster. She still pampers me by cooking for me when I am with her,' she says. "Knot" To Tie So does this superstar of the small screen feel the inevitable pressures to "settle down" and get married?
Sakshi replies firmly, 'My parents, like me, are very progressive and they believe that when I know it's the right time to do it, I will.' Sakshi recalls the time when her father set up a meeting with a prospective match, who asked her when she would stop working post marriage. The actor did not miss a beat and replied: 'When you stop working!' And that was the end of that. Of Rumours & Ram Kapoor Although Sakshi Tanwar-Ram Kapoor are one of the most liked on-screen couples in television for BALH, there has been plenty of media talk about their turbulent off-screen relationship. Rubbishing these rumours, Sakshi says, 'I have never had anything to complain of. We are both professional people and share a great on-screen camaraderie, and beyond that there is a lot of mutual respect. We are secure in our individual spaces.
If there was any rumour about any clash between us, it was baseless.' In fact Sakshi says that Ram is great to work with and that most of their scenes are impromptu, and go beyond the script. 'We are both spontaneous people and most of our bantering -the famous Ram-Priya bantering, if you've seen the programme - is mostly natural. If there was any rumour about any clash between us, it was baseless.' In fact Sakshi says that Ram is great to work with and that most of their scenes are impromptu, and go beyond the script. 'We are both spontaneous people and most of our bantering -the famous Ram-Priya bantering, if you've seen the programme - is mostly natural. At times we don't even refer to the script, and we go on and on, and then suddenly we look at the director and say, "Will you say cut please!" We would have finished the scene long back, but were enjoying it so much, that we didn't realise it was over!' she declares.
Thirteen & Going Strong
Sakshi started her career with Ekta Kapoor's (Balaji Telefilms Limited) Kahaani Ghar Ghar Ki. Thirteen years on and their association still holds strong, and she's ruling the roost again with the production houses' recent success BALH. The industry is abuzz about Ekta being a very difficult person to work with, so what is Sakshi's equation with her. 'Balaji (Ekta's production company) is like family now. It's not just a place where you go, work and come back. Ekta is professional and she's focused about what she wants. Yes she is a hard taskmaster! And why not? Anyone who's putting in the amount of dedication and hard work she is... If I were in her place, I would do the same.
If you are committed to a project or a show, you're expected to give in a certain number of hours of work and professionalism to make it successful. If you're not doing it, and somebody's pulling you up for it, then that's fair. But yes, she's definitely not what the media has portrayed her to be. On the contrary, she's a fun, chilled-out person. I guess because she's in the spotlight, everything associated with her is blown out of proportion,' she says. Away From The Mundane While most actors would have jumped at the chance to star in a Balaji project again, Ekta apparently took a while to convince Sakshi to play the character of Priya in BALH.
'After working dayin-day-out for eight years, I wanted to do nothing for a while - to wake up in the morning when I felt like it, and not have an agenda or POA for the day. When doing Kahaani for 8 years, I did work that most people would do in 16 years of their lives, because we were working on a daily, and there wasn't even one episode without me. It would be unfair to say I didn't get my holidays, but the holidays used to be rushed... I just wanted to laze around, go for a vacation and enjoy my "metime" activities... I wanted to be with family and friends, watch movies, and basically just put my feet up and relax and enjoy my time, my way. And I did that for two-and-a-half years,' says Sakshi, calling it one of the smartest moves in her life.
Considering so many lucrative opportunities were coming her way every day, didn't she feel anxious about losing out to newcomers and stardom? Admits Sakshi, 'It took guts to do "nothing". Yes I had doubts... but I was sure that I didn't want to do anything remotely similar to what I had already done... I was not growing as an actor.' Good Girl Gone Bad The actor ended her hiatus when she was offered something "challenging" - the role of Teepri in Balika Vadhu -an out-and-out negative character. Calling it a fabulous experience Sakshi says, 'I thought it was an important exercise for me to do an as actor. It was like a 180o turn.
It gave me a high, but made me realise that I needed to brush up my acting skills.' However, with Sakshi's earlier image being so positive and inspirational - almost holier-thanthou - this new avtaar didn't go down well with the audience, who never expected their favourite "bahu" to turn into a vamp. But the actor says that that will not deter her from taking up similar projects in future.
The Reel vs Real Sakshi
Coming to the two iconic roles that have made her one of mainstream television's popular actors - Parvati and Priya - who does the real Sakshi Tanwar relate to, and pat comes her reply, 'Definitely Priya in BALH! People in our country have this habit of binding a person by his/ her relationships. When I was Parvati - I was the ideal wife, bahu, bhabhi, and last came the fact that I was an individual. The good thing about Priya's character is that she speaks like a woman first, and then as a wife, mother, bhabhi, bahu and so on. Even in a recent track I did, Priya's sister-inlaw Natasha wanted to divorce her (Priya's) brother, and Priya supported her cause.' 'Why should a woman live with a man she's not happy with? This echoes the sentiments of the today's woman. And Priya (Sakshi's characher in BALH is today's woman - working, independent, late-marriage, single parenting, everything you see in a typical urban scenario is reflected in her character, which a lot of working women - both single and married, and I, can associate with,' she adds. Sakshi recalls incidents when women would come to her and tell her how their mothers-in-laws wanted them to be like Parvati. 'But today, from "I would like to be like her (like Parvati)", it's transitioned to, "I am like her! (like Priya)" That's a big change, and it's so refreshing to be real - to not always have perfectly styled hair or correct clothes or impeccable makeup and accessories,' she adds.
Most urban strapped as they are for time. Another thing the actor loves about her character in BALH is that she speaks her mind... much like Sakshi in real life. 'Whether to her in-laws or to her husband, to her own family or to outsiders, she's not the coy housewife who thinks that "yeh kehne se rishte tut jayenge" (If I say such things, relationships will get strained), which is so today, so me,' she says.
Let Life Surprise You
She's not planned anything for the future and believes that life is a journey, and one should take it as it comes. Candid about her stardom, she says, 'I didn't know I will be here, ever. Even with Kahaani, I used to think that I will do it for a year or two, and then be done with it. I am not very ambitious. I can't force myself to do something I am not in the mood for.' There was a time when acting was everything for Sakshi. She would go to the shoot early in the morning, and spend endless hours there, and then start thinking about the next day's shoot. But she believes that the break she took helped her put things in perspective. 'At that time, everyone was telling me that I was a "waster" because I was rejecting plump offers. But I knew that even if I don't get anything ever, I am sorted. Coming from where I did, and with the kind of ambition that I had, I didn't expect so much love, adulation and success.' Not many know that back in 2009, Sakshi starred in a movie called Coffee House opposite actor Ashutosh Rana, which didn't do too well. Ask her about any Bollywood plans, and she says that nothing's "on" for now.
A Star So Humble
Though deceptively low-profile and simple, Sakshi is confident. Yet, she's grounded too, notwithstanding the number of advertisements in her kitty, and more fame coming her way than several Bollywood stars. In fact Sakshi has shot for a record 15 commercials in the last 2 years. Recently, in a consumer survey, Sakshi featured in the top 5 "most trustworthy celebrities", along with Madhuri Dixit and Katrina Kaif, guaranteed to ensure the success of a product in the market. However, she says she understands the transient nature of her work well, and has no illusions of long-lasting grandeur.
'When doing Kahaani as the lead, I was very pampered by Balaji. And then I worked with another production house as a secondary character, and there the treatment was very different. So why was I getting that much importance in Balaji? Because I was the lead, not because I was Sakshi Tanwar. I understood this difference well. This is great, but only till it lasts!'
Did-You-Know
Sakshi Tanwar shares some interesting facts about herself. I am more of a music buff than a television person. I love Bollywood music, especially old Hindi songs. I love to travel, and make sure I do lots of two-day getaways from time to time. My last holiday was in Mizoram for seven days. It's beautiful and unadulterated by tourism. I am not fashion-conscious. For me, comfort comes first. But I love colour in my wardrobe. I enjoy cooking and don't employ a full-time maid. When I cook, and someone appreciates it, it gives me a high! My favourite films are Guide and Sholay
