Take :6&7th Mar: Does Ram need to carry guilt??? - Page 3

Originally posted by: Dilligurung

i noticed one thing very clearly that script for male part is completely dominated by female part. They focus more on priya part than Ram's. Thats the one n only problem of the show. N ya, where does dis word ego come fr? When did he show his ego in the show?

Originally posted by: fosla

Dilligurung

That's my biggest problem y'day!! Why make a man the scapegoat becoz u want to show something different. Becoz all ur oother shows show woman, the sacrifical lamb.. it doesn;t justify to get someone to scream at an innocent man who did nothing wrong except saying tht suite word. C;mon.. This was like total BS.. Ego.. I haven't seen it in ages now.. He was the one who went on a kalakatta date and stood with her thru BC scare when she wanted to handle it among themselves..

Originally posted by: mem1

and stood up for her parents, and trusted her in the Ashwin case, and far before that, even during their wedding, he waited outside the hall in his dulha outfit, sat through the non-Ac wedding and stood up for his father-in-law. the list is endless. ...

Hi! I'm more or less a silent member of this forum so this is probably not the best of replies to arrive with but the recent episodes have just been so full on that one must break the silence! Now I'm probably going to get slaughtered for this but I think there's a different angle to put out here, I love your posts fosla, the sarcasm and humour make even the most annoying episodes better but I kind of disagree with you, not completely but in a weird way. I don't really know if I can explain it properly but see my take is that you're right when you say Ram doesn't need to carry the guilt but the kind of character that he is it is in his nature to carry the guilt. I guess the point I'm making here is that I don't think the creative have made a mistake in regards to the reactions that these characters have given. I think the problem with this show is that the characters are extremely relatable so when we start analysing them, without realising we start thinking about how we personally would behave.

I see it this way - If I was Ram I'd give Priya 10mins to calm down after the extremely long rant and follow her to whatever room she went to, I'd give her a huge hug and not let go until she melted and listened to what I had to say, which is why I kept screaming at the screen telling him to go after her.

If I was Priya I'd probably do the whole shouting thing and I would call him all the names that she did including selfish and egoistic because I know I can get mean when I'm mad and that's the same with Priya she got mean and I was all like "Go Priya it's your birthday" (trust me I did the dance to go with it too- don't ask I can get overexcited on little things) but after saying I love you (which I personally wouldn't scream but hey to each his own) I'd calm down, probably sniffle a little, try to wipe the tears, look at him to see if he says anything for a while and if he doesn't play the cool game telling him it's fine if he doesn't and slowly but sternly walk out of the room hoping he'd stop me.

But the thing is that these characters, though relatable are different, after all the ranting I don't blame Ram for not saying anything because I'd personally need a few minutes to take it all in too, but Ram being Ram is the cautious guy who has to think about doing stuff before any action and so he waits a long time before trying to approach Priya, now Priya who's just left still probably reeling from her own outbreak does probably realise in her mind that she's kind of ruined stuff but she's hoping Ram will now take the next step of saying something to her and sort things out.

Everyone keeps mentioning that these characters are int heir 30's/40's and are mature people so should behave differently but I think what people are forgetting is that it's easier to adjust to someone at a younger age, it's easier to have a stupid fight and then do cute little things to make up for it, after an age I think you feel awkward in doing cute little things if you haven't done them before. And these two people have been hurt in the past, Ram by his mother and Priya by her ex bf, so even though they love each other, and are mature and trust each other they both have a fear of rejection, it's the fear of rejection that has made them do the stupid stuff that they have, it's not ego on either side it's the fact that even though they know they are scared of having their heart broken since they don't know if they'll be able to get over it. And Priya called Ram out on his fear because she knew what he was feeling since he was feeling the same, I'm not really defending Priya, in fact I'm not defending either of them, I think both of them have been stupid but I think what they have done in the episode kind of goes with what happens in real life, it would've have been extremely clichd if Ram had turned around, confessed and they had a hug and to be honest that doesn't always happen in real life.

In Priya's case after all the ranting she's had the last word and when that happens you tend to start thinking that you were the right one in the situation that fuels your ego and you become stubbornly annoyed so much so that it's not just about the issue you were fighting about but more about the fact that you don't want to forgive that person anymore! And with Ram his guilt makes sense to me because he's just realised how much Priya does love him, I mean we all knew but he didn't, he did think she liked him but he didn't understand how hard she had fallen for him and he does realise that the whole thing has just blown up in his face and that he didn't give Priya a response though in all fairness she didn't really give him a chance! But see that's the kind of guy Ram is, he's the sweet teddy bear softy guy that hates it if someone gets hurt because of him and he does think that Priya is hurt because of him so he wants to make it up to her. I mean would we love Ram's character as much as we do if he acted indifferent to Priya's tears?

And when it comes to judging Priya's character I think it's easier to judge her as wrong but harder to understand her actions, 1) she's already been betrayed in love once and only recently recovered, so all that she said to him was more for her than him, she was trying to tell herself that he's not as great as she thinks and that it's her fault that she liked him so much, she's the one who shouldn't have expected anything because she doesn't want herself to think that she's been fooled again. 2) I agree with everyone saying that poking fun at Ram's weight was below the belt but what Ram said about booking her a suite with Ronit was also far below the belt and half of her shouting was heavily based on the anger she felt about that. 3) It's easier to feel sorry for Ram since WE as an audience know that he was going to confess but what we forget is Priya didn't know that he was going to confess, after his return she's faced a hubby who hasn't noticed what she's done in the room for him, hasn't noticed or commented about her changed attitude towards him, hasn't given her attention and also just spent the whole night out without caring about her! So I see why she's so annoyed, it's not just that one confession thing it's a bunch of little things that she's let out in one big argument, she's just taken that one argument and vented all her frustration and fear.

So even though like every other member I would've loved a big make up session between the two, loved a few romantic moments and drooled over the looks they'd give each other I think the episode has made sense to me, after all how many times do we have arguments over stupid stuff? No one's perfect and no one behaves properly all the time, I know Priya is going OTT and really Ram should just go make her calm down and make up but at the end of the day it doesn't always happen like that in real life, sometimes you do make a mountain out of a mole hill that's just how relationships go so even though today wasn't the best of episodes for me, it kept the reality of the whole thing intact and for that I liked it.

So that's it, I've just realised I've written an essay here so I'll shut up now! You can come out with your jhoote and chappals…

I 100% agree with you.

What a beautiful and mature take!!

The beauty of the serial is that no-one is perfect. The characters are real .Both Ram and priya have their set of insecurities, past demons and shortcomings. Their reactions are not perfect either'The CVs have glorified or demeaned Neither Ram nor Priya.They are just normal .I have seen some real people who are similar to these characters some way or the other.

I cannot take sides and pass judgements as who's wrong and who's right. Because per me both are flawed and imperfect. This is what makes me like both Ram and Priya.

Please do keep on posting your takes and views in the future. Would love to read them.

Originally posted by: one_ashi

Hi One_Ashi.

Iam glad that I finally made a post compelling you to come out of hibernation!! No body is gonna slaughter you.. Trust me.. Otherwise,,I should have gone extinct after making this post!😆

Thanks for liking my posts dear.. Your premise is perfect.. The characters are relatable and played to perfection making us forget it's fiction. We tend to see them as real people and hence the analysis gets to dictating their behavior~!

I liked your behavior of Priya and Ram if it were you!! I felt so down since it wasn't a two way street after a point of time. Then it didn't even justify the need for the ranting. Ended up being all kinds of ridiculous stmt and filmy drama baaz but not before accomplishing the mission of shutting the man up!

Everyone keeps mentioning that these characters are int heir 30's/40's and are mature people so should behave differently but I think what people are forgetting is that it's easier to adjust to someone at a younger age, it's easier to have a stupid fight and then do cute little things to make up for it, after an age I think you feel awkward in doing cute little things if you haven't done them before. And these two people have been hurt in the past, Ram by his mother and Priya by her ex bf, so even though they love each other, and are mature and trust each other they both have a fear of rejection, it's the fear of rejection that has made them do the stupid stuff that they have, it's not ego on either side it's the fact that even though they know they are scared of having their heart broken since they don't know if they'll be able to get over it. And Priya called Ram out on his fear because she knew what he was feeling since he was feeling the same, I'm not really defending Priya, in fact I'm not defending either of them, I think both of them have been stupid but I think what they have done in the episode kind of goes with what happens in real life, it would've have been extremely clichd if Ram had turned around, confessed and they had a hug and to be honest that doesn't always happen in real life.

Exactly.. The expectation that the whole ranting should have resulted in Ram's reciprocation beats me!! Becoz.. for heaven's sake.. the guy was planning a confession not having an affair.. He was doing everything to make it the best and all hell breaks loose due to the misunderstanding.. Guess what he gets beaten on the ego and rejection factor.. I was baffled!

In Priya's case after all the ranting she's had the last word and when that happens you tend to start thinking that you were the right one in the situation that fuels your ego and you become stubbornly annoyed so much so that it's not just about the issue you were fighting about but more about the fact that you don't want to forgive that person anymore!

Exactly!! A one way monologue where you end up glorifying yourself and making the other person shi**y. While it's your ego you end up blaming the other guy!! Let's get a confession out now!😛

And with Ram his guilt makes sense to me because he's just realised how much Priya does love him, I mean we all knew but he didn't, he did think she liked him but he didn't understand how hard she had fallen for him and he does realise that the whole thing has just blown up in his face and that he didn't give Priya a response though in all fairness she didn't really give him a chance! But see that's the kind of guy Ram is, he's the sweet teddy bear softy guy that hates it if someone gets hurt because of him and he does think that Priya is hurt because of him so he wants to make it up to her. I mean would we love Ram's character as much as we do if he acted indifferent to Priya's tears?

How could she not see those tears, all that excitement to surprise her at his office and all that open mouthed admiration of her when she entered that party.. Ram has to be the sweet teddy bear softy guy.. I say.. unleash tht sleeping lion!! Enough!! He does everything for her all this while and he gets to hear this!! Thanks for pointing my fatness too!! Made it all the more better!

And when it comes to judging Priya's character I think it's easier to judge her as wrong but harder to understand her actions, 1) she's already been betrayed in love once and only recently recovered, so all that she said to him was more for her than him, she was trying to tell herself that he's not as great as she thinks and that it's her fault that she liked him so much, she's the one who shouldn't have expected anything because she doesn't want herself to think that she's been fooled again. 2) I agree with everyone saying that poking fun at Ram's weight was below the belt but what Ram said about booking her a suite with Ronit was also far below the belt and half of her shouting was heavily based on the anger she felt about that. 3) It's easier to feel sorry for Ram since WE as an audience know that he was going to confess but what we forget is Priya didn't know that he was going to confess, after his return she's faced a hubby who hasn't noticed what she's done in the room for him, hasn't noticed or commented about her changed attitude towards him, hasn't given her attention and also just spent the whole night out without caring about her! So I see why she's so annoyed, it's not just that one confession thing it's a bunch of little things that she's let out in one big argument, she's just taken that one argument and vented all her frustration and fear.

I was willing to give the benefit of the doubt about ignorance.. but in most cases, it was not willing to see it esp for someone who claims to note every move. If Priya ranted as a flawed human being.. I wouldn't have had an issue understanding her. But she kept herself on a pedestal and showed him how he doesn't deserve her. While Vikram didn't exactly tell Ram, There were enough hints from Priya abt Ram's love for her.. now if you know the other person is a child and you promise to take care of him to his mother,. would you walk out after taking care of him and breaking him down? If it was about Ronit, she wasn't completely right becoz she went overboard on the weight issue(an insecurity factor!) repeatedly inspite of promises and maintained the stance the next day morning! There's only soo much one can take!

So even though like every other member I would've loved a big make up session between the two, loved a few romantic moments and drooled over the looks they'd give each other I think the episode has made sense to me, after all how many times do we have arguments over stupid stuff? No one's perfect and no one behaves properly all the time, I know Priya is going OTT and really Ram should just go make her calm down and make up but at the end of the day it doesn't always happen like that in real life, sometimes you do make a mountain out of a mole hill that's just how relationships go so even though today wasn't the best of episodes for me, it kept the reality of the whole thing intact and for that I liked it.

I was all for a passionate confession at the end of the day! We can argue a million times over stupid stuff. but this was no argument. It was about belittling the other person for questioning her character. It was about beating the man to a confession and walking out when he didn't react. It was not abt acceptance of being a flawed human being but a goddess who loved and lost it to someone who didn't deserve it!! That's my only problem!! I was all for women power to go and give him right for offering suite.. But this went beyond that! She knew she was mature than him in matters of the heart. she knew he was a child. she knew he loved her and did everything for her. But she went and hammered that man with unfair reasons and left his bare soul! And my dear friend.. That's my problem!

So that's it, I've just realised I've written an essay here so I'll shut up now! You can come out with your jhoote and chappals'

No please.. you made absolute sense and i have my comments to argue too.😉

Originally posted by: Kinara2

this is ektaas style to make confess from female lead..in kasam se it had happened the same..and over there it was the same boring party and Bani came home by herself and was waiting for jai here is the same ..and same o rona dhona and confession of ishq.
whats the fight for?..she could have thought different beautiful way to confess their love for each other..

Originally posted by: mem1

Priya had realised her feelings a long time ago, but she did not think Ram had those feelings at the time. So if she had opened up to him then, it would be like forcing him into something he was not ready for. She loved him, but had no expectations from him in return.

But after the BC scare, and during the America trip, it became very evident that he too is in love with her. At that point, it was OK for her to declare her love without putting him in any sort of uncomfortable situation.

As far as blaming him for not declaring , she had no way of knowing that he had something planned. She does not know for sure that he came back for her, or that he planned the band and everything. All she knows is that he yelled at her about his diary instead of noticing the room, then left her and went to the party for no apparent reason, and then totally ignored her at the party. So from her POV, everything she said made total sense.