Is Tara wrong to reject Shravan?

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Sunaina Mitra

@sunaina02

Inactive

+ 6

Posted: 15 years ago

#11

Ramy

I loved your idea bout Tara coming back to get the "Readymade product"

You have very aptly described the theme of the serial 👏👏👏👏

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kulsum wadi

@wadi..doll

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 15 years ago

#12

tara is right to reject shravan becuz she have her studies on her and she is right becuz shravan is irresponsible ...................tara is not even intrested in marrying in shravan.....................lolz ............lolz

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Prateeksh

@Prateeksh

Navigator

+ 2

Posted: 15 years ago

#13

I think Shravan has an MBA, as a I faintly remember from some early episodes...but he isint working well thats the case which is justified.

The main question is whether Tara really wants to marry Shravan or not? Well if it is, it would be a love marriage and I hv seen people do all sorts of compromises for love marriages...I am not asking her to keep her career on stake for Shravan, but the condition of 1 yr without she being sure of her love to Shravan is not justified.

Saanchi got married into this mess but is keeping her credibility, her future life and security in doldrums, just to get Shravan some hold on his life....why ? coz she loves him....so I think i would some way agree to Tara for not marrying right away coz of her studies, but the waiting period as a condition is something i cannot digest....

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@desi-indian

Explorer

Posted: 15 years ago

#14

Tara is completely right and I guess in today's world nobody will be willing to marry a guy who has no clue what he will be doing with his life and is very irresponsible and childish like Shravan is. Even Tara's dad is right, when he ask his daughter to stay away from him as he does not want his daughter to become like Shravan and waste her life...

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akhl

@akhl

Dazzler

Posted: 15 years ago

#15

There are often discussions, which compare the girls who are career-minded and those who want to focus on taking care of family.

It is thought that only the first category of girls can be considered modern. I beg to disagree. Focussing on one's carreer is indeed praise-worthy. But taking care of family is no mean task. It takes effort and is novel.

Let us see why modernity is oftened equated with being career-minded. Long long ago, in India, women were supposed to take care of home. They were seldom allowed to step outside out of their own wish. Men used to earn.Women were supposed to be dependent on the men of the family. If a man tortured his wife, it was considered quite normal. He had even the power to force his wife to leave the home. Having no means of income, the woman did not know where to go.

Education had to be provided to boys. Regarding girls, it was thought that she would have to take care of home (washing, cooking, taking care of babies etc.), and therefore there was no need for them to get educated. Here, it is also important to add that in those days, girls were married in quite small age.

Things slowly started changing. Girls got educated and started earning so that they could stand on their feet. They were not completely dependent on their husbands. Thus, they were not forced to tolerate injustice. Having career became synonymous with being modern and the women, who believed in not having career but in taking care of the family, came to be known as backward-thinking.

But, just because a woman does not want to have a career, is it right to call her backward-thinking woman? There are many women, who are well-educated. They are well-versed with news from different parts of the world. They can discuss fluently on diverse topics. They are married, her husband or anybody else has no problem with them having career. But, out of their own choice, these women decide not to persue any career, but to take care of family.

It is true that having career enabled women to stand up against injustice. But, it does not mean that women in olden days did anything foolish taking care of family. The real reason is that it was the fault of the men of those days. It was wrong on their part to think that, just because, they were earning, they could torture their wives. If their wives were dependent on them because the men were earning, then the men were also dependent on their wives because the wives took care of home. But the men very conveniently ignored this fact. One reason was that men could have any number of wives, but it was rare for women to have more than one husband. This was a big discrimination against women.

In conclusion, I would like to say that education is very important. But the purpose of education is not only to earn money. Education has much wider purpose. It is ok for women to be career-minded. It is also ok for them not to be career-minded. In order to be fair, that rule should be applicable for men too. Whether they have a career or not should depend on their choice and also on the benefit of the entire family, including the women themselves. Depending on the situation, both men and women may need to do some sacrifices. Depending on the situation, it may also be the case that the wife has to earn and the husband has to take care of family. This may sound weird but there may be situation where it is justified.

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akhl

@akhl

Dazzler

Posted: 15 years ago

#16

Sorry for such a long post. Hope I did not confuse anybody. 😊

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blahblahs

@blahblahs

Navigator

Posted: 15 years ago

#17

Originally posted by: akhl
Sorry for such a long post. Hope I did not confuse anybody. 😊

not at all! in fact, i found your post very wise and thought provoking. 😛

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RohaniChopda

@RohaniChopda

Dazzler

Posted: 15 years ago

#18

Originally posted by: sunaina02

By reading the opinions here , I feel modern grls are very calculative in love . They will not love a guy who cannot earn loads of money or is not doing very well in profession. So actually that translate to not loving the guy but his profession and money .Parents especially "brown parents" instill this attitude in their girl kids . 

As i have mentioned before true love does not do account keeping , it just loves . Money is not everything in life. There are many things in life which cannot be bought by money - one example is happiness. 



Coming back to Tara's theme. My personal opinion is Tara should reject Shravan if she doesnt love him . But if she loves him, med or no med , she should try to be with Shravan.

I do not know about anyone else, but I don't necessarily think that modern girls are "very calculative in love". Maybe some, but not all. But that could have been the case back in the day as well. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that I feel that Tara rejecting Shravan was okay because she obviously did not love him, and also, another reason why her rejecting his love was understandable was that Shravan was very immature. Regardless of his degree or profession, he just acted like a child, and no one who acts like that should really be married. Also, Shravan comes from a wealthy family, therefore if Tara's main concern was really money then she would have married him in a second lol.

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RohaniChopda

@RohaniChopda

Dazzler

Posted: 15 years ago

#19

Originally posted by: akhl
There are often discussions, which comparethe girls who are career-minded and those who want to focus on taking care of family.
It is thought that only the first category of girls can be considered modern. I beg to disagree. Focussing on one's carreer is indeed praise-worthy. But taking care of family is no mean task. It takes effort and is novel.

Let us see why modernity is oftened equated with being career-minded. Long long ago, in India, women were supposed to take care of home. They were seldom allowed to step outside out of their own wish. Men used to earn.Women were supposed to be dependent on the men of the family. If a man tortured his wife, it was considered quite normal. He had even the power to force his wife to leave the home.Having no means of income, the woman did not know where to go.

Education had to be provided to boys. Regarding girls, it was thought that she would have to take care of home (washing, cooking, taking care of babies etc.), and therefore there was no need for them to get educated. Here, it is also important to add that in those days, girls were married in quite small age.

Things slowly started changing. Girls got educated and started earning so that they could stand on their feet. They were not completely dependent on their husbands. Thus, they were not forced to tolerate injustice. Having career became synonymous with being modern and the women, who believed in not having career but in taking care of the family, came to be known as backward-thinking.

But, just because a woman does not want to have a career, is it right to call her backward-thinking woman? There are many women, who are well-educated. They are well-versed with news from different parts of the world. They can discuss fluently on diverse topics.They are married, her husband or anybody else has no problem with them having career. But, out of their own choice, these women decide not to persue any career, but to take care of family. 

It is true that having career enabled women to stand up against injustice. But, it does not mean that women in olden days did anything foolish taking care of family. The real reason is that it was the fault of the men of those days. It was wrong on their part to think that, just because, they were earning, they could torture their wives. If their wives were dependent on them because the men were earning, then the men were also dependent on their wives because the wives took care of home. But the men very conveniently ignored this fact. One reason was that men could have any number of wives, but it was rare for women to have more than one husband. This was a big discrimination against women.

In conclusion, I would like to say that education is very important. But the purpose of education is not only to earn money. Education has much wider purpose. It is ok for women to be career-minded. It is also ok for them not to be career-minded. In order to be fair, that rule should be applicable for men too. Whether they have a career or not should depend on their choice and also on the benefit of the entire family, including the women themselves. Depending on the situation, both men and women may need to do some sacrifices.Depending on the situation, it may also be the case that the wife has to earn and the husband has to take care of family. This may sound weird but there may be situation where it isjustified.

I agree with you a 100%. Education is key. After one has gained knowledge and been educated, they can make the decision to either pursue a career or not. Education is very crucial for everyone because it gives them the freedom to think for themselves and throughout the years has helped women and other minorities escape their tortured and unjust lives.

Relating this to BHPH, Tara is a woman, modern or not, who simply wants to focus on her education and her career before she jumps into marriage. I feel that they are showing this as a bad thing in the show, and Sanchi wanting to stay at home and "change" Shravan as a good thing. I don't know if that's truly what they're trying to portray, but it is just what it seems like to me. In the end, I'm glad Tara is being honest about her goals and did not rush into anything she was not ready for. This just leaves both Shravan and Sanchi stuck in an unhappy marriage, which is why people should not get married when BOTH of them do not love each other lol.

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.shona.

@.shona.

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 15 years ago

#20

i love tara...she's such a today's strong girl👏
i suport her for wat she did...liek u wud rather marry somebody who's PREPARED to be married who's PREPARED to take the responsibilities...& well shravan is prepared for none.

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