Abhi’s Mistakes, his Growing Up with Time

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srividya

@sree

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 20 years ago

Hi All

Very pleased to note that many of the Astitvans have put forward great predictions for our last Discussion Topic..So now it is time for us to move ahead with our next Discussion Topic for the fortnight....Let us mix it up with some predictions and bitter facts that have taken place...This idea was courtesy innocentindian, but as he was busy with some work, i have taken up the job of posting it...

We know that Abhi has committed many many unpardonable mistakes in his life. As Saurabh puts it, such mistakes cannot be forgiven. So we will be having our Discussion Topic in 3 parts.

1. Abhi has committed many mistakes in life. We will list out the top ones.

Abhi behaving odd with Simran during pregnancy
Abhi having an affair with Kiran
Abhi leaving Simran
Ran away from responsibilities at all times
Not married Simran again after Kiran deserted him
Showed over the limit concerns to Simran after marrying Neha
Again after agreeing to marry Simran, dumped her at the alter
Then after meeting Simran in Goa, refusing to come back

Friends, these are only a few mistakes (probably the major ones) we have covered. Please put forth the other mistakes that Abhi has made.

We have seen Abhi's character grow from a very irresponsible, immature individual to the one he is now, a very mature thinker who has learnt over his past mistakes. He has gone away from the world and spent a lot of time in remorse- doing "prayaschit". Even though we see a changed Abhi, we have never considered him as a responsible son, responsible husband, responsible father. What we suggest is that the Astitvans come together and come up with suggestions as to what Abhi should do to rectify all the mistakes he has committed. Alongside each point, perhaps readers of the forum can (in diff colour as a suggestion) write out what they think abhi should do to avail himself.

2.To top it all,We now see Abhi's angry, immature, impulsive behaviour in Astha. Now that Abhi has come back for good, he now knows Astha is to be corrected. He might also realise that she has the same qualities that were in him, which ultimately ruined his life. So what do you think Abhi will do to stop Astha from making the same old mistakes? Can Abhi handle Astha well just bcos he too has gone thro' this phase? We also know that Abhi has not yet proved himself to his family. So will this be his chance to contribute to changing the situation to good? Will he ever be able to get a good place in Saurabh's mind? When the serial ends, will Abhi be portrayed as a man who learnt from his mstakes, now leading a very good life with his family, being a very responsible son, committed husband, caring and responsible father? Can Abhi give himself more dignity and respect by doing some good deeds?

3.Now we very well know that the Astha/Sid/Sia triangle is placed in a precarious position. We would like to stress on the fact that this triangle might likely shape up similar to Simran/Abhi/Neha. So, viewing the mistakes Abhi made in the past, can we provide some light as to how this triangle can be sorted out(placing Abhi's mistakes as reference). We have put this particular point in our previous Discussion too. There, we wanted predictions asto how this triangle will end up. Here, we expect the members to view this triangle of Sia/Sid/Astha asto how Abhi will see it, will react to it? Please remember that Abhi too was involved in one such triangle in his past....

So people, we have put together 3 separate areas of discussion, yet all to do with abhi. Please do come forward and let us know what you think he should now do. This week (in India) we have seen how abhi managed to get astha to apologise to simran. What else should he do? Will he do? Awaiting your replies....

Come on friends and Astitvans, Please come out with your viewpoints....

Moderator and Viewbie Group, IF

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Frequent Posters

ASR

@vvrsun

Inactive

Posted: 20 years ago

Originally posted by: sree_20

1. Abhi has committed many mistakes in life. We will list out the top ones.

Again after agreeing to marry Simran, dumped her at the altar

You have forgotten the reason Abhi dumped Simran at the temple, namely his extreme guilt for not returning Neha's love for him after reading her diary. And he also left a detailed letter for Simran which she worships every year. So this cannot be a mistake.

Originally posted by: SREE_20

3.Now we very well know that the Astha/Sid/Sia triangle is placed in a precarious position. We would like to stress on the fact that this triangle might likely shape up similar to Simran/Abhi/Neha. So, viewing the mistakes Abhi made in the past, can we provide some light as to how this triangle can be sorted out(placing Abhi's mistakes as reference). We have put this particular point in our previous Discussion too. There, we wanted predictions asto how this triangle will end up. Here, we expect the members to view this triangle of Sia/Sid/Astha asto how Abhi will see it, will react to it? Please remember that Abhi too was involved in one such triangle in his past....

The Abhi-Simran-Kiran triangle is different because Abhi was already married to Simran, and he was unfaithful to her.

Similarly, the Abhi-Neha-Simran triangle is different because now married to Neha, though faithful to her, neglects her and does not return her love.

In the Sid-Sia-Astha triangle, nobody is married, so it could go any way, and lessons learnt by Abhi cannot be applied here, at this point.

I remebered somebody mentioning that Baby Astha tied rakhi to Sonu, and I repeated this in a couple of my other posts. Is this not significant? Probably this will come out when they go though the childhood snaps of baby Astha? Will it not bust the so-aclled trianlge?

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desipride

@desipride

Inactive

Posted: 20 years ago

😆😆Abhi needs to use his BRAIN!😆😆

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belarajput

@belarajput

Inactive

Posted: 20 years ago

Abhi has kidnapped his own child Astha once.

Not contacting to his own parents for 18 years.

Not contacting to Simran atleast for Gudiya

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srividya

@sree

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 20 years ago

Hi Friends

It will be nice if you all could talk of all the points we have put across here...Please consider this Topic as a Discussion ,please do not write one-liners......Hope you all understand...

Sree

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cutereems

@cutereems

Dazzler

Posted: 20 years ago

Very good discussion Sree di.

Mistakes by Abhi: Everyone in this world makes mistake. Abhi is also a human being so its obvious to make mistake. According to me in his life his major mistake was

He had an affair with Kiran after marrying Simran

This is one of biggest mistake he commited according to me. It was because he was very immature at that point of his life. He was more of kiddish. This is one mistake which I could have never forgiven him if I was in place of Simran.

Originally posted by: sree_20
Not married Simran again after Kiran deserted him

Abhi not married to simran again after he deserted Kiran was not a mistake. He was guilty at that time. I think he did right. It wouldnot have been good if he would ask simran to marry again. Its not like Ek chod diya to Doosre ke paas aya. He learnt a lesson when Kiran dumped him for someone else. He would have felt same as what simran felt when Abhi had relation with Kiran.

Originally posted by: sree_20
Showed over the limit concerns to Simran after marrying Neha

Again I don't agree that it was his mistake. They have showed Abhi as being mature. Any matured person would have limit concerns even if it is his Ex wife.

Originally posted by: sree_20
Again after agreeing to marry Simran, dumped her at the alter

This is might be his mistake. He didn't want to marry bcoz he was still feeling guilty. But if that was the matter then he must not have agreed to marriage. Agreeing and dumping at last moment is very irresponsible. He must have told it before itself.

Originally posted by: sree_20
Then after meeting Simran in Goa, refusing to come back

He refused to go back bcoz he thought that his was mistake was that big that his "prayaschit" was not enough. But I sometime feel that he was running away form his responsibilities. If he was guilty he could have gone away from Simran but what his parents did? He is the one who must take care of his parents but he failed doing so. He was not a good son.

The way Abhi was during his teenage or during early part of his marriage…same is seen in Astha. She is also immature. Now As Abhi has gone through this phase…he must tell his daughter. He can stop her from doing mistakes by only telling his story. Sia was mature enough and hence accepted it. But will that be same in case of AStha?

I am sure Abhi will try to stop her but she will not listen to anyone. She is very stubborn. Atleast Abhi was not stubborn. But Astha's mistake is not similar to that of Abhi. Astha doesn't have trust in Simran as she thinks that Neha is mother nad Simran is nothing to her.

He will surely get good place in Saurabh's mind as this is a serial. Saurabh might get good views about Abhi when Abhi brings Astha back or does something good to their house.At end of serial he will be a good Father for sure but Good Husband is far away.He is not a good son too as he didn't take care of his parents.

Coming to Sia/Sid/Astha love triangle. Abhi will be in dilemma when he gets to know about this love triangle as both are his daughters. Since Sid loves Sia ending must be in favour of Sia. Though abhi was also involved in such triangle but it was something different from this. There, one was Ex wife whom he loved and other was present wife. We cannot compare these two triangles.

Edited by cutereems - 20 years ago

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frosty

@frosty

Voyager

Posted: 20 years ago

Abhi sure has made a lot of mistakes over his life, but
according to me his biggest mistake was rushing into his first marraige
with Simran. I know Simran loved him and all that but Abhi according to
me was not matured enough to handle his wedding vows. He was in love
with the idea of being in love. He did not want to take any of the
responsibilities that went with the relationship. We all remember that he
wanted Simran to go in for an abortion, because he was not prepared
mentally at all for a child at that time. He was so immature that he
actually believed that Simran would accept Kiran as a part of his life!! I
have personally always thought that Abhi rushed into each of his
marraiges because of all the wrong reasons and that is why he has
blundered through each of them.

I know that during a pregnancy the husband is the wife's greatest
support but I think Abhi was fairly young and was not prepared to take
on the responsibility of a child. It is a fairly huge event, and not everyone
can handle it unless they are mentally prepared for a child. I agree that
Simran thought that it would never happen for her again had she aborted
the child, but in hindsight a lot of the problems arose because of this,
and this is why I believe that Abhi marrying Simran at that time was a
mistake. Simran was far too mature and Abhi was immature even for his
age.

As far marrying Kiran was concerned that was another HUGE blunder that
he committed. He had a relationship with Kiran because of the fears and
insecurites that he was facing about the child. Definately not the time to
rush into another marraige. Kiran according to me was also rather
insecure and immature, not at ALL what Abhi needed. As far as Neha was
concerned I always thought he married her because Simran asked him to.
Another stupid decision. I believe that if he wanted to do "prayaschit"
then he could have done it by supporting Radhaji, being a good father to
Gudiya and taking care of his parents. I really do not understand what he
was trying to achieve by hurting Simran and giving her so much pain.
How was that supposed to atone for what he did albeit unknowingly to
Neha?

As far as what Abhi should do now, I think he should primarily focus on
being a good father, caring for Astha, giving her reassurance that she is
as important as Sia to him and Simran, being a good son. His unfortunate
parents have lived alone for the past 18 years for no fault of their own.
They are old and they had none of their children by their side. He needs
to spend a lot of time with them. It amazes me that he felt so much guilt
over ruining Neha's life and not ONCE did he think about his parents. He
knew that they had already lost a daughter, did they really need to lose a
son too? What he did to Neha was bad enough, but what he did to his
parents was criminal. Mr and Mrs Saxena have been insulted because of
Abhi several times over the years. His abandonment of them is one crime
I which, according to me, is unpardonable. And finally he needs to share
some of Simrans burdens and give her emotional support.

I believe that with time Abhi may be able to turn Astha
around and Astha may accept Simran, but I honestly doubt if she would
accept Sia. She views Sia as a rival not just for her parents affection but
also Sid's affections. I believe that once Abhi spends enough quality time
with Astha and explains to her what actually happened between him and
Neha and tells her all the facts about his history with Simran and then the
Kiran episode and finally about his wedding with Neha I think Astha may
understand. Abhi also needs to explain to Astha that Radhaji has a mental
illness and that she tried to burn the house down with Astha in it. I think
if Abhi sits Astha down and tells her the entire unblemished truth I am
fairly sure that she will understand. I think that all the lies and part truths
that have been told to Astha are largely responsible for her drastic
reaction. I am sure that once she knows the entire truth about Abhi and
Simrans relationship from the beginning she will relent. But Abhi needs to
do this patiently and not get angry with her or compare her to Sia.

In the Sia-Sid- Astha case I hope Simran does not continue
here stance of Sid and Sia must sacrifice their happiness because the
Astha Sid relationship has fiasco written all over it. I am sure she does not
want Astha to be in a loveless marraige. Astha is just 18, she is young
and will fall in love again. As I have said earlier Astha should realise that
you cannot force someone to love you and hence step aside and I hope
that Abhi supports this decision of hers and is there to comfort his
daughter when she needs hin the most

Edited by frosty - 20 years ago

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vazz

@vazz

Inactive

Posted: 20 years ago

Given Abhi has done all the mis deeds, but he still has the love for Simran and so does Simran. He should make up for lost time put his act together and act his age. Like frosty said, he loved the idea of falling in love, he did not want to shoulder the responsibilities that came with it. Not marrying Simran when Kiran left him, I would not consider that a mistake. I consider marrying Neha the biggest mistake. He had realized that he loved Simran. He married Neha only because Simran asked him to. You do not take a step like this, after being with 2 women already. He knew in his heart that he loved Simran, at that time, all he could think of was how to please Simran and that's what cost him his marriage to Neha. I agree Abhi felt very guilty after reading Neha's diary, but what he did was again running away from the issues. I guess everybody has drilled that one down his 'brainless' brain.

He needs to take Astha under him totally. He needs to observer her and reason with her in the manner in which she will respond. If he also starts to lose his temper on her, then all these years of prayschit will not be of any use. He should be able to read her thoughts, as he sees so much of him in her. Abhi has a golden opportunity in his hands, it will be the biggest challenge for him to be able to prove himself to Simran and the rest of the world.

Sid, Sia and Astha triangle is a very immature triangle. Abhi-Neha-Simran is a triangle that was forced upon by the parties in the triangle. In this case, they are still young, and will need to let each other come out with their true feelings and see how the triangle shapes up. Anything could happen… but what I do not want to see is a relation that is thrown upon on a person, like how it is happening today. Simran needs to learn from her past, where she forced the relation on Abhi with regards to Neha. She is repeating the same mistake, but forcing Astha on Sonu. Marriage is a relationship where both parties need to love and respect the other. Love without respect does not exist, to me and the situation between Sonu and Astha is so comparable with Abhi and Astha. The difference being, this relationship can be cut at its nip and prove that we do learn from our mistakes.

Edited by vazz - 20 years ago