Oh Anuj, can I just give you big bear hug 🤗
The pain, the longing, the yearning and the guilt, gosh how much pain has this guy endured and continues to do so...he’s so honest that he doesn't let the hope settle, the hope of her in his life...One sided love is a thing I know but what Anuj feels for Anupama is way beyond that. As Devika rightly said he’s her devotee.
He has time and again admonished himself for feeling even the slightest of bit of hope...The dejected look on his face after the mahal-mahal role play yesterday crushed me...dude stop bruising your heart so ruthlessly, you don’t deserve this...you deserve all the love in the world...here comes another big hug🤗
Honestly, the way he rebukes himself for stepping out of line breaks my heart each time...first when he dreamt of her being a part of his life, then every time the evil people of the ghosla cruelly reminded him that his dreams can never come true, the time when he broke down after asking Anupama to leave her house and now! He just cannot bear the thought of losing her! the fear is so huge that he constantly keeps his emotions in check and nurses his self inflicted wounds with her smile and happiness.
He thinks the tall wall he’s built between his feelings and her is strong but much to his dismay it often falls weak and he punishes himself everytime a wish slithers through it...He has forbidden himself from desiring her!
Dear Anuj, she will be yours one day and that day you shall love her guilt-free.
Cricket
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