Mental harassment done on Kavya - Page 4

l dont endorse Sah familys constant taunting if Kavya while Vanraj is an equal culprit neither do I validate Anupama still being a care taker to the remaining of Sahs when she should have moved on and moved firward from this toxic hellhole.

However, the logic that women taking care of family, working in kitchen - in short homemakers like Anupama being a threat to womankind while a homebreaker like Kavya being the posterchild of modern woman is kind of a brain bender to me.

So a woman should be considered an ideal 21st Century woman despite her non existent moral and ethical compass as long as she is financially independent？

Got it...

Originally posted by: shiv8879

The Shah family is constantly taunting Kavya for no reason. Kavya is being tortured and mentally harassed by the Shah family just because Vanraj cheated on Anupama.

Kavya is being compared against Anupama which is very unfair. Anuapama and Kavya are 2 different individuals. Kavya is better than Anupama. Kavya is a modern woman when Anupama is just another kitchen maid.

The mental harassment inflicted on Kavya is making her turn bitter. The torture is making her turn into a vamp when she is not.

The makers of the show need to change the story line and project Kavya as a good person because Kavya is every modern woman in Mumbai, Delhi and Bengaluru when Anupama is nothing but every modern woman's nightmare.

Women across the world are fighting for privileges. It is not a woman's duty to cook or take care of her husband's family just because she was born a woman. Kavya represents those modern ideologies.

Whereas women like Anupama prevent such modernization from happening by focusing on household chores and family. They hold back women from evolving.

Anupama is a threat to women rights. As long as women who cook and take care of family are glorified, the society can never progress because cooking and taking care of family are not a woman's responsibility!

My dear please go and see khene ko humsafar hai. What a person affair should feel. And what Kavya is doing is controlling. OK you can't trust V so why be in a toxin relationship. What Kavya doesn't understand is others emotions.

Being a modern educated woman doesn't mean you can't cook, kavya is modern and educated but not independent, idiot and immature while Anupama not being enough educated is independent, sensible and smart. I always thought that education makes you a good person but kavya proved me wrong. Whatever Anupama was/is doing I admit it was wrong and only she was suffering for it but what kavya is doing, whole family is suffering for it.

People are treating kavya same as she's treating each one of them, only if she tried to be a little bit patient, she wouldn't be receiving this hatred

Originally posted by: Muskie

Being a modern educated woman doesn't mean you can't cook, kavya is modern and educated but not independent, idiot and immature while Anupama not being enough educated is independent, sensible and smart. I always thought that education makes you a good person but kavya proved me wrong. Whatever Anupama was/is doing I admit it was wrong and only she was suffering for it but what kavya is doing, whole family is suffering for it.

People are treating kavya same as she's treating each one of them, only if she tried to be a little bit patient, she wouldn't be receiving this hatred

Hey mushkie how are you? 😳 nice to see you here 🤗

I hate what Anupama is doing right now, and the message the show is sending out, but I don't think anyone is being unfair to Kavya here.

Does she expect the Shah family to welcome her with open arms after everything she did?

Originally posted by: Rein123

Anupama agreed to stay on because that cheat of a husband literally left her stranded after 25 years with no financial backing to fall back upon. And she has rights over the house and children, her children that are living there. She could have gone to live with her mother but why? Vanraj is the cheater, he is the one who married another, he should leave the house. And if Kavya really was all that nice, she would have moved out when Vanraj voiced to Bapuji that he will move out with Kavya. But no, Kavya’s evil wheels in her head started spinning at break neck speed, she wants the huge house, she wants to queen it over the beautiful house that Anupama has so loving nurtured, so she stopped Vanraj mid sentence.

Kavya has a problem, it is not just love for Vanraj but an insatiable desire to be Anupama. Maybe it goes back to her childhood or her having no other family but she hankers after everything Anupama has. The woman could have built a happy family with Anirudh but no, she had to come wreck what Anupama had and snatch everything from her - like the sari she literally tore out of Anupama’s hands, like ruining Anupama’s mehendi, wanting to marry Vanraj on the date of his 25th wedding anniversary - the woman is a psycho.

Anupama is and was part of the Shah household for 25 years, she has children there, why wouldn’t she continue living there? A marriage license doesn’t give any woman any undue rights. Kavya may have rights over Vanraj but that is about all Kavya has.

Since you mention the West, here, ex-wives and ex-husbands do remain friends in the majority of cases, they don’t stop being parents to the same children they fathered/mothered, that is a responsibility for life regardless of who their current partner is. At the marriages of their children, the divorced/separated parents oft act as one parental unit (which they are and again which will not change whoever else they are married to). I have friends who still remain best friends with their exs and act as their confidantes. Nothing wrong with that, they may have fallen out of love but have still co-existed for years, raised children together, all that does not vanish in an instant just because some other woman now claims she has the legal wedded license to call the man her husband.

Kavya trying to usurp Anupama’s place in everyone else’s life is absurd, childish, manipulative and irrational. Being married to Vanraj does not give auto power to Kavya to rule over the Shah household, she cannot erase 25 years of Anupama with the snap of her fingers, Kavya has married an already married man with grown children and she went into the marriage knowing full well what she was getting into so I would tell her to suck it up and grow up.

As to not packing Pakhi off, given the opportunity, Kavya would certainly do that, she can’t do it day 1 or week 1 after marriage. And as for kicking out Ba and Bapuji, she has thought about it at least 4 times and voiced it to them once. Why should the Shahs make excuses for her terrible behavior? We are all put in uncomfortable situations, how we deal with it is the true test of character. And Kavya is dealing pretty poorly.

Kavya is the instigator not the other way around. She broke up a happy family albeit with the cheating husband’s help, she is rude as you know what with the rest of the household and everyone is supposed to look past it because she is angry, she is hurt, she is sulking, she is pouting cos poor baby Kavya didn’t get her way? The woman is unhinged if not evil. Let’s agree to disagree.

I agree with every single word here.

Anupama is a much more modern woman over Kavya any day. She is so sorted that every woman modern or otherwise may learn from her. Kavya has a long way to go for even being called a woman. All she cares about is “I, ME, MYSELF”. Who gave her the right to insult Anupama for even a drop of a hat. She is insecure because she knows that she is wrong all along and Anupama is much more capable than her in sorting her life and still keeping every relationship intact. Kavya knowingly forcefully became part of the family breaking another woman’s home. She wanted all of Anupama’s rights, family, husband, house and everyone’s attention and love for all the work that Anupama put in for so many years. In my opinion, women like Kavya are really cheap and totally intolerable. She reminds me of the other woman in the serial “Saans”. Even her standard was little better than Kavya.
And I totally DISAGREE with the topic starter.

Originally posted by: neo7

You really have an effed up definition of a modern ideology and a regressive ideology.

A modern ideology doesn't mean that you work in a office, a modern ideology is that its a woman's choice whether she wants to work in a office or want to become a housewife. Modern ideology is not running after a man and threatening him to marry you when he has in multiple possible ways shown disinterest in marrying you. You don't achieve modernization by working in an office, it has to be in your thinking, if she was modern, she would have kicked Vanraj out of her life after bearing so much direct and indirect insults from him, and please it is not love it is just obsession.

A woman doing household chores is not regressive and they can be equally modern, bcoz modernity comes from your thoughts. Anupamaa is more modern than Kavya bcoz she had guts to kick Vanraj out of her life despite so many obstacles, be it family pressure, be it taking charge of your own life, be it starting a career at the age of 43, be it accepting that her daughter in law doesn't need to sacrifice her dreams for family responsibilities, or be it not caring about how a society sees a divorcee. She has infact shown a way to women to exercise their rights who accept their husbands EMA just bcoz they do not have a source of income or they are afraid of what society will say. So Anupamaa isn't the threat she is a way shown to woman who are in such situations which are many in our country. Also Anupamaa works and still does household chores but willingly.

And don't forget it is the men like Vanraj who try to cut the wings of the women who expects them to only take care of their house.

Doing household chores does not prevent modernization, it is the freedom that is not given to women to choose is what a regressive thinking is.

And coming to comparison of Kavya and Anupamaa. Kavya has time and again humiliated the family, be it threatening to send them to jail or shouting on bapuji when she made sweet dish without even understanding that he was actually offering her made dish to God first. If I would have been part of a family where someone comes and threatens to send my family to jail on false accusations, Main jaake uski aarti nahi utarungi zindagi bhar. The comparisons made are not with respect to the household chores, but in respect to their behaviours. And anyways she is trying to seperate Vanraj from his family, then why does she bother if they accept her or not. That so called modern thinking woman Kavya didn't even stand by Nandini when her truth came that she cannot become a mother. Anupamaa was more modern in thoughts than Kavya in this situation also, she knows just giving birth to a kid is not everything. Society would be better if we do not have so called modern women like Kavya.

Only wrong decision that Anupamaa took was stay back at Shah house and that is going to mess her life more.

Today the way she spoke of Bapuji and yelled at Anupama and Vanraj. The way she screamed at Hi Fi Bai and how she played the victim card that she was treated this way as she had no one. The way she is going she will definitely lose all she has and her beans.

@soapwatcher1, you are an amazing writer. Love all the facts you stated here. Kavya’s state is like ulta chor kotwaal ko daante. Very well written analysis! Agree with every single point. And yes lots of badduwas for V.

Originally posted by: soapwatcher1

The equation here is between Anupama and Kavya. How Vanraj treats Kavya is irrelevant and moot when it comes to Kavya’s behavior with Anupama.

Vanraj treated Anupama badly, she did not take that out on Kavya. As a wronged and cheated wife, she could have lodged a complaint against both erring cheating adults, she did not.

The equation between Kavya and Vanraj is theirs to sort out, fight it out, Anupama is not responsible for Kavya’s state of mind. Kavya usurped Anupama’s rights, not the other way around. Kavya along with Vanraj is responsible for Anupama’s wronged plight.

Blaming Vanraj for Kavya’s idiocy is neither here nor there. Kavya can leave the house - there is no such legal right or expectation that the wife has to live in the same house as the husband’s family. She is Vanraj’s current wife but is not accepted as a daughter in law. Kavya has no rights in that house. She is newly married and has not contributed anything yet to gain community property rights over anything that belongs to Vanraj.

Plus the house is Bapuji’s, not Vanraj’s. 25 plus years of being Vanraj’s wife, Anupama is owed half of everything that Vanraj has. He cannot pay her alimony (he did not think of it until the last episode) as he does not even have a job. Half of his 1/3 share of the house also rightfully belongs to Anupama as she was his wife for 25 years and was not recompensed for the divorce, a divorce brought upon by mental and physical abuse and cheating.

Kavya remains in the house only because she has always wanted to be Anupama. She has fantasized living in that room with Vanraj in Anupama’s stead. Kavya is the outsider, the interloper that has maneuvered her way in. She does not belong there. Bapuji is still alive and does not need to dispose of his house yet. He had the decency to divide it up between his 3 children, one being Anupama. Dolly owns 1/3 of the house but does not live in the house. So Vanraj can be be a man and walk out of the house along with his witchy wife. He wanted to but Kavya is the one that stopped him as she had evil plans to kick the old man and woman out and reign over the huge house as queen. She has no rights over the family home, none, nil, yet has fantasies of being queen there, she had no rights on Vanraj yet had fantasies of being his wife, living in his room, wearing saris he had purchased for his wife, Anupama.

Kavya has from the beginning wanted to anihilate Anupama’s identity. Is it because in her sick mind, Kavya really hankers after the idea of being like Anupama more than Kavya wants to be Vanraj’s wife? Whatever the reason for her identity crisis, it is Kavya’s problem to be figured out. We don’t excuse criminals for their behavior by laying it on their bad childhood or failed relationships, similarly, Kavya’s reasons may make a good psyche study but cannot be used as excuses for her terrible treatment of Anupama and the rest of the family.

Anupama’s relationship is not just with Vanraj, she has children, she has in-laws who in 25 years have become her parents. The divorce ended her relationship with Vanraj, took away his rights to abuse her. Being a woman and a divorcee does not automatically make Anupama the outsider, to the contrary, she is still Rakhi Dave’s samdhanji, she didn’t stop being Toshu’s mother, she is still Kinjal’s saas. The stupidity in addressing Kavya as Kinjal’s saas grates.

A marriage in itself does not make a relationship with the family. It might give the relationship a name which Kavya obsessed after, she got the title of wife, everything else is not auto hers. She is not Kinjal’s saas - she is the Step saas, the house is not hers just because she is married to the slime guy. She may have rights over him now and in ten years over his share of the property, until then the woman is just making a huge fool of herself. Vanraj deserves every bit of her crazy self and I hope he suffers an empty stomach, has severe migraines, develops GERD, and has FOMO every second as he watches his family being happy with Anupama. He needs to be kicked out of the house, Bapuji should not have given Vanraj even that 1/3.

I can’t believe how people can support a selfish, conniving, illicit, unreasonable and immoral behavior and totally disregard someone’s honest life and hard work of 25 years to build a family and home. Thank you @soapwatcher1 for putting forth the facts and your reasonable analysis..♥️♥️

Originally posted by: soapwatcher1

Anupama agreed to stay on because that cheat of a husband literally left her stranded after 25 years with no financial backing to fall back upon. And she has rights over the house and children, her children that are living there. She could have gone to live with her mother but why? Vanraj is the cheater, he is the one who married another, he should leave the house. And if Kavya really was all that nice, she would have moved out when Vanraj voiced to Bapuji that he will move out with Kavya. But no, Kavya’s evil wheels in her head started spinning at break neck speed, she wants the huge house, she wants to queen it over the beautiful house that Anupama has so loving nurtured, so she stopped Vanraj mid sentence.

Kavya has a problem, it is not just love for Vanraj but an insatiable desire to be Anupama. Maybe it goes back to her childhood or her having no other family but she hankers after everything Anupama has. The woman could have built a happy family with Anirudh but no, she had to come wreck what Anupama had and snatch everything from her - like the sari she literally tore out of Anupama’s hands, like ruining Anupama’s mehendi, wanting to marry Vanraj on the date of his 25th wedding anniversary - the woman is a psycho.

Anupama is and was part of the Shah household for 25 years, she has children there, why wouldn’t she continue living there? A marriage license doesn’t give any woman any undue rights. Kavya may have rights over Vanraj but that is about all Kavya has.

Since you mention the West, here, ex-wives and ex-husbands do remain friends in the majority of cases, they don’t stop being parents to the same children they fathered/mothered, that is a responsibility for life regardless of who their current partner is. At the marriages of their children, the divorced/separated parents oft act as one parental unit (which they are and again which will not change whoever else they are married to). I have friends who still remain best friends with their exs and act as their confidantes. Nothing wrong with that, they may have fallen out of love but have still co-existed for years, raised children together, all that does not vanish in an instant just because some other woman now claims she has the legal wedded license to call the man her husband.

Kavya trying to usurp Anupama’s place in everyone else’s life is absurd, childish, manipulative and irrational. Being married to Vanraj does not give auto power to Kavya to rule over the Shah household, she cannot erase 25 years of Anupama with the snap of her fingers, Kavya has married an already married man with grown children and she went into the marriage knowing full well what she was getting into so I would tell her to suck it up and grow up.

As to not packing Pakhi off, given the opportunity, Kavya would certainly do that, she can’t do it day 1 or week 1 after marriage. And as for kicking out Ba and Bapuji, she has thought about it at least 4 times and voiced it to them once. Why should the Shahs make excuses for her terrible behavior? We are all put in uncomfortable situations, how we deal with it is the true test of character. And Kavya is dealing pretty poorly.

Kavya is the instigator not the other way around. She broke up a happy family albeit with the cheating husband’s help, she is rude as you know what with the rest of the household and everyone is supposed to look past it because she is angry, she is hurt, she is sulking, she is pouting cos poor baby Kavya didn’t get her way? The woman is unhinged if not evil. Let’s agree to disagree.