The subtle realism - Page 2

Pom of course we remember you!! Excellent post!!

Hi Pom!

Hello!

Dear Pom, To say that I absolutely Love, celebrate and endorse your post would not be an exaggeration by any measures. I not only remember you but remember one of your posts after that Panchayat episode...wherein you very beautifully talked about how a husband should prioritize and welcome the wife in his life and household...I wanted to comment on that one as well...but just due to the paucity of time...could not do so. Also, as that thread covered all the aspects more or less on the subject...I had nothing much to add there. So, neither have I forgotten you nor your brilliant posts.
Now, coming to this one...I have been writing on a similar subject since last week...for an academic assignment and was making a version for this forum...considering the way the makers have shown the Aru-Mukhi dynamics in terms of their sexual concerns, desires and the related aspects. This show has actually re-instilled my faith in the saying that Feminism is the radical notion that women are humans. I will make a separate post on this subject for sure...but just to also add to yours. I have to state that the sexual lives of Indian couples is so unidimensional and only for the purposes of procreation...that I find it extremely demeaning. Erotica, pleasure, desire (especially on the part of the female partner) does not feature in the equation at all. My Doctoral thesis was on the topic of Law on Surrogacy in India...for which I conducted a micro-level field research in the northern India, Delhi, Gujarat, Haryana etc. and spoke with some women in this regard. Some of the women...who visit the clinics to hire the services of a surrogate have told me that they have just been married for 6 to 8 months...sex is not often...and husbands are many times, travelling for work or any reason...but there is a pressure to conceive...right from Day 1. In the first ceremonies (Like the Muh Dikhai etc.)...that is choicest blessing which is showered on a woman."Agle saal tak teri god mein Lalla Khele" Do we even realize the demand and expectation under the garb of blessing. Marriage, I always believed is a partnership of companionship and this decision should be entirely taken by the couple. A woman is brought into the family to give a progeny and a successor (subtly a male child). This pressure, has lead some of the women to hire these alternative reproductive methods and hire the services of another vulnerable set of women...'the poor ladies', who do this for money. This subject of sexual freedom, autonomy and woman's choice sounds so good in theory but in reality it is actually a sad and dismal state of affairs.
Needless to say, that I am proud of this post and every single comment to this thread...that added unique dimensions to the subject!! I felt actually quite good to visit the forum after long.👏

Originally posted by: rainbow2017

Hi Pom!

Beautifully written post!👏

I watch MMKD on and off (don't want to get attached to a TV show, been there, done that. Its pretty frustrating when things don't go the way they are supposed to.🥱) but do follow the forum pretty regularly.

I love the progressive elements of the show a lot! Especially, the frankness with which Mukhi and Aru's relationship has been shown. As you said, its unnatural that two people in love will not have sexual attraction towards each other! We Indians are such prudes when it comes to sex, as if its a disease and not in the natural order of things! So its pretty refreshing to see a mainstream show where the protagonists are not squeamish about their physical and sexual attraction towards each other. (More so given the rural settings of the show!)

Its nice to see the couple realizing that the only thing left to cement a married relationship that already has friendship, respect and affection is by consummating it. I especially like the portrayal that Aru, despite her age and inexperience, is so open to the idea of going ahead with Mukhi. She is not affected by his clothes, or his age or anything like that. She looks at him like a woman looks at a man whom she is in love with and the show has expressed that aspect so wonderfully.

I don't know which way the creatives will take his lovely serial, but whatever they are showing now is just fantastic! Even shows which built their premise over passionate love hardly dare to show the sexual side of a relationship, but MMKD, with its December-May premise dares to do that! That the protagonists discuss it is even more delightful (and funny because Aru is such a cartoon!😆) I don't remember watching any Indian soap, which depicted anything like this!

PS : Weird question - Do you guys think Mukhiji is a virgin?😆

Originally posted by: rainbow2017

Hi Pom!

Beautifully written post!👏

I watch MMKD on and off (don't want to get attached to a TV show, been there, done that. Its pretty frustrating when things don't go the way they are supposed to.🥱) but do follow the forum pretty regularly.

I love the progressive elements of the show a lot! Especially, the frankness with which Mukhi and Aru's relationship has been shown. As you said, its unnatural that two people in love will not have sexual attraction towards each other! We Indians are such prudes when it comes to sex, as if its a disease and not in the natural order of things! So its pretty refreshing to see a mainstream show where the protagonists are not squeamish about their physical and sexual attraction towards each other. (More so given the rural settings of the show!)

Its nice to see the couple realizing that the only thing left to cement a married relationship that already has friendship, respect and affection is by consummating it. I especially like the portrayal that Aru, despite her age and inexperience, is so open to the idea of going ahead with Mukhi. She is not affected by his clothes, or his age or anything like that. She looks at him like a woman looks at a man whom she is in love with and the show has expressed that aspect so wonderfully.

I don't know which way the creatives will take his lovely serial, but whatever they are showing now is just fantastic! Even shows which built their premise over passionate love hardly dare to show the sexual side of a relationship, but MMKD, with its December-May premise dares to do that! That the protagonists discuss it is even more delightful (and funny because Aru is such a cartoon!😆) I don't remember watching any Indian soap, which depicted anything like this!

PS : Weird question - Do you guys think Mukhiji is a virgin?😆

I think that's the million dollar question we all asking? His awkwardness suggests he is but his touch suggests he isn't ...he knows how to push that button on a woman...Now is Mukhi jus a gentleman and watched films hahaha or or is this where Eijaz could be over acting ...well not over acting but experienced acting, considering most his roles were lover boys and it jus comes naturally to him to do those scenes without remembering Mukhi is a virgin ...

And lovely original post, very well written 👏

@pom

I think it's a welcome back for a lot of us since many of us were missing over the last few days. And feel better. Hope everything gets well.

Coming to the episodes, As you rightly put it, just loved how they are dealing with the physical intimacy topic here. It's open yet subtle, honest and at the right time. Just because they confessed their love for each other doesn't mean that they have to jump in bed at the first available opportunity. It's a progression, increasing physical comfort level with each other, gradually heightened desires. In short it's a process. I like that they are dealing with it realistically. The actors are doing a fantastic job and We can see it on the screen.

Having said that, I did feel that it was a little inconsistent to show such a beautiful, heart warming conversation when Mukhi dismissed all of Aru's fears with that one promise and then in the next episode Aru constantly blaming him of trying to get physical with her. Make up your mind girl!! That discussion was so so beautiful and then she suddenly doesn't trust him the next day. I mean what is that? I am not saying that they should never talk about it. But in the last two episodes it seemed like she is constantly on guard about this and is reprimanding the poor guy for something that he is not even doing. Once you develop that trust you don't constantly question it. It's either there or not.

Another thing I am a little disappointed with is the constant dealing with physical proximity. If they want to show their relationship growing then they have to know each other better. How much does Mukhi know about Aru and vice versa? Comedy is good but constant nagging and fighting isn't funny. I really wish they would show a scene where Mukhi opens up to Aru about his parents, who i think he lost at an early age, his journey of becoming a Mukhi or something like that. We know about Aru but we don't know anything about Mukhi. These interactions are going to bring them closer mentally, emotionally and physically. And then they won't need to set a cut of date and use a curtain to decide when they want to completely surrender themselves to each other.

Sorry if my observations are a little on the critical side. But for once I had high hopes of this beautiful relationship progressing in a very subtle, loving and yet passionate manner. If they want to fight great evils in the form of Rami, Arjan and above all Dharmi, their bond, their trust on each other and their love will really need to be a lot more stronger. As Mukhi rightly put it, a time when they know each other so well that they don't need words to communicate. And I honestly didn't see that in the last two episodes.

Take care

Vidi

Originally posted by: Debashri123

Dear Pom, To say that I absolutely Love, celebrate and endorse your post would not be an exaggeration by any measures. I not only remember you but remember one of your posts after that Panchayat episode...wherein you very beautifully talked about how a husband should prioritize and welcome the wife in his life and household...I wanted to comment on that one as well...but just due to the paucity of time...could not do so. Also, as that thread covered all the aspects more or less on the subject...I had nothing much to add there. So, neither have I forgotten you nor your brilliant posts.
Now, coming to this one...I have been writing on a similar subject since last week...for an academic assignment and was making a version for this forum...considering the way the makers have shown the Aru-Mukhi dynamics in terms of their sexual concerns, desires and the related aspects. This show has actually re-instilled my faith in the saying that Feminism is the radical notion that women are humans. I will make a separate post on this subject for sure...but just to also add to yours. I have to state that the sexual lives of Indian couples is so unidimensional and only for the purposes of procreation...that I find it extremely demeaning. Erotica, pleasure, desire (especially on the part of the female partner) does not feature in the equation at all. My Doctoral thesis was on the topic of Law on Surrogacy in India...for which I conducted a micro-level field research in the northern India, Delhi, Gujarat, Haryana etc. and spoke with some women in this regard. Some of the women...who visit the clinics to hire the services of a surrogate have told me that they have just been married for 6 to 8 months...sex is not often...and husbands are many times, travelling for work or any reason...but there is a pressure to conceive...right from Day 1. In the first ceremonies (Like the Muh Dikhai etc.)...that is choicest blessing which is showered on a woman."Agle saal tak teri god mein Lalla Khele" Do we even realize the demand and expectation under the garb of blessing. Marriage, I always believed is a partnership of companionship and this decision should be entirely taken by the couple. A woman is brought into the family to give a progeny and a successor (subtly a male child). This pressure, has lead some of the women to hire these alternative reproductive methods and hire the services of another vulnerable set of women...'the poor ladies', who do this for money. This subject of sexual freedom, autonomy and woman's choice sounds so good in theory but in reality it is actually a sad and dismal state of affairs.
Needless to say, that I am proud of this post and every single comment to this thread...that added unique dimensions to the subject!! I felt actually quite good to visit the forum after long.👏