Chapter 4
"Ishu, what was the need to come to such an expensive restaurant? And you haven't even gotten your salary yet!" Madhavi complained whispering as they were ushered into the posh interiors of one of the finest restaurants in Delhi. "Amma! Its okay. Relax! Its important to relax and have fun once in a while," Ishita said. "Relax? Have fun? When young girls have fun, they end up getting pregnant!" Madhavi replied. A fleeting look of startle passed over Ishita's face before she looked away. The waiter leading them to their table had heard her and had a silly grin on his face as he helped the ladies into their chairs. "Amma! Please!" Ishita said settling in and placing her napkin on her lap. Madhavi followed suit and smiled at the waiter embarrassedly. "Ma'am, would you like bottled water or regular water?" the waiter asked. Before Ishu to speak up, Madhavi asked, "How much for the bottled water?" "One hundred and fifty rupees Ma'am," the waiter replied. "One hundred and fifty rupees?! For water?! I can buy 2 kilos of tomatoes, make rasam and drink it for two whole weeks at this price!" Madhavi exclaimed. "Amma! Please!" Ishita tried to stop her mom. "We'll take regular water. Thank you," Ishita said embarrassedly to the waiter. The waiter smiled and went to get the water.
Ishita glared at her mother but Madhavi paid no attention as her eyes were glued to the menu. "Aiyo Ishu! Look at this! A coffee here costs Rs 400!! Do they mix gold powder in the coffee?" she asked. "I don't want to order anything from here. Our monthly budget will be in ruins if we eat from here. We'll just drink water and go." "Amma.. For the hundredth time, please! For once, can you stop worrying and just have fun. And before you say that young girls who have fun end up pregnant, let me tell you that's not true. Times have changed. My salary will be in by the first so I am sure we'll have cash to spare," Ishu said. "But Ishu.." Madhavi started to protest. "No ifs and buts Amma. And as it is, if we do run into problems with money, we can always take some from the savings you have set aside for my marriage," Ishita said cheekily. "No way! That money is solely for your wedding! I've been saving up from the day you were born. We will have so many ceremonies and such festivities. I will invite all our family from Chennai. I couldn't get myself to leave this house that your Appa and I had bought so many years ago, or we'd be living in Chennai with everyone now. It was our dream to send you to your husband's house from here," Madhavi said getting just a little teary eyed.
Ishita reached over and clasped her hand. "Its your biggest dream, isn't it Amma, to see me married?" she asked solemnly. Madhavi nodded her head, "Yes! Once you are married and happily settled, I can die peacefully and go be with your Appa." "I wish you had bigger dreams for me Amma," Ishu whispered sadly. "What did you say Kanna?" Madhavi asked. "Nothing. You miss him a lot, don't you?" Ishu asked. Madhavi nodded her head, "Yes. If he were here, I could have given you a better life. Maybe I wouldn't have been worried all the time - about managing expenses, about our safety, about every little thing. Maybe I could have been more calm and relaxed and had fun like you said." There was a long pause before Madhavi spoke up. "I've been very strict with you Ishu and I know that. Its because I was scared. So very scared. That something would go wrong. And just that thought scared me. I act as if I am strong but I don't know if I could handle something going horribly wrong with us," Madhavi confessed. She dabbed at the corner of her eye with the pallu of her saree.
"You know I was 18 when I got married. I had just one glance of your father, from the corner of my eye when he came to see me. Two weeks later, I was sitting in the kalyana mandapam getting married to him. I had always thought I would be a homemaker, sit at home, cook, clean and take care of the kids just like my Amma. I never had the drive to study or have a career or be independent. Your Appa forced me to finish my college. Just after you were born, Appa got a transfer to Delhi. When we first came to Delhi, we lived in one room of a two bedroom house that belonged to a Gujarati family. We had a kerosene stove in one corner, a few utensils and a bed. Thats all. We had to wait till the house owners had finished using the bathroom before we could use it. I would help them with their household chores once in a while and they would adjust it in the rent. Your dad hated that I would do their work but it helped us save some money. The family would leave their daughter in my care every so often. Soon other people in the neighborhood started doing the same. It turned into a small daycare of sorts. When one of the parents put in a word for me at the local kindergarten and I got a job there, Appa decided we needed a home of our own. Whatever little savings we had and a bank loan helped us buy this apartment. It was small but it was ours. I still remember that smile on your Appa's face that first morning after we moved in when he said, "Now I don't have to wait my turn for the bathroom." This house was Appa's dream. In a way, he felt it was his biggest accomplishment." Madhavi and Ishu both smiled fondly. "And then, just when we thought things were looking up.. That horrible, horrible accident happened.." Madhavi said, her voice faltering. "I still remember that peon from Appa's office who came to our house that evening. The look on Narayanan's face as he said we need to get to the hospital." Ishu squeezed her mother's hand gently and said, "No Amma. Lets not go there. Not tonight." Madhavi shook her head gently as she snapped out of her trance recollecting that fateful day.
"Ma'am. Here is your water. Would you like to place your order now or do you need a few minutes?" The waiter asked. "Please give us a few more minutes," Ishita replied. The waiter nodded and left. Ishita looked at her mother. Her mother had been 23 or 24 years old when her dad passed away. From then on, she had struggled all alone, in a strange city, to raise her daughter the best she could. Something that Ishita hadn't really understood growing up. For someone who had wanted to spend her life as just a wife and a mother, having to work and support herself and her daughter all on her own, at a young age, must have been so challenging. Ishita wished she could take back all those times that she had rebelled against her mom while growing up, all those times when she had argued and thrown a fit. "Amma.." Ishita said, her voice choking slightly. Madhavi looked up at her. "I am sorry. I wish I could've been a better daughter to you," Ishita said. "Kanna.. You are the best daughter anyone could ever wish for. And I am proud of you!" Madhavi said. Ishita gave a half smile. "Now lets order something. I'm getting hungry," Madhavi said.
At the table right behind Ishu, Raman Kumar Bhalla found it increasingly difficult to concentrate on what his friends were saying as his attention constantly wandered to the mother-daughter duo sitting at the table in front of him. Somewhere, the struggles that Ishita's mother had been through resonated with him. His father had had a stroke when Raman was still in college. Since his father couldn't go back to work and his mother wasn't educated and he had three younger siblings to take care of, Raman had dropped out of college to join his father's friend's company. It was through his sheer dedication, skill and hard work that he was now the CEO of such a reputable company. He stole a glance at Ishita who was moving the food around in her plate absently. There was something about her expression that Raman couldn't really place. Before he could ponder on it further, the waiter brought their check. As he left the restaurant with his friends after settling the bill, Raman made sure that Ishita did not see him. For all he knew, she would startle and choke on her food again. Raman smiled at the thought as he exited the restaurant.
"Ishu.." Madhavi said as the waiter cleared away their plates. "Yes Amma," Ishita replied. "If I tell you something, promise me you won't get angry," Madhavi said. "Okay.. Which guy is coming to see me tomorrow Amma?" Ishita asked. "But.. how did you know?" Madhavi asked. "Amma.. I've been with you all my life. I always know what you are upto," Ishita said. "Now, you sound like you are my mother," Madhavi said. "Anyways, this is Swami uncle's son. You won't remember Swami Uncle but he used to live in the same street as us in Chennai. Can you believe that his son has grown up to become a doctor? He is a dentist now!" Madhavi exclaimed. "Amma.. Dentists are not doctors. They are just dentists," Ishita said dryly. "No! No! Swami Uncle told me that they learn everything that doctors learn," Madhavi explained. Ishita shook her head.
"So Subramaniam, Dr. Subramaniam, is a dentist in Chennai and he is looking to expand his practice and move to Delhi. And I sent your horoscopes to Panditji and he said that on first look everything looks great. I don't know why Ishu.. But I have a feeling this is going to work out," Madhavi said happily. Ishu watched the happiness on her mom's face and smiled. "They are coming to Delhi next month to look for office space. I told them they could stay with us. No need to book a hotel or anything," Madhavi said excited. Ishita looked at her mother alarmed. "Stay with us Amma? That'll be so weird!" Ishita exclaimed. "You know, Subbu said the exact same thing. And he insisted that they will stay in a hotel but I convinced them that they would eat with us and not from outside," Madhavi said. Thank God, at least this Dr. Subramaniam had the sense to know that staying at their place would be weird, Ishita thought.
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