She woke up yawning and looked around to find the room empty.
She checked the alarm clock kept on the side table of the bed and realized that she had slept for about an hour already.
I will just clear things and be right back, she recalled his words and got into a deep thinking.
Inka kaam ab tak khatam nahi hua kya jo yeh ab tak nahi aaye...itna jyada toh kaam bhi nahi tha kitchen mein, she murmured to herself while setting her saree right to go out and check him.
(Is his work not done already that he hasn't come till now...there was not much work in the kitchen, she murmured to herself while setting her saree right to go out and check him.)
He lied there on the sofa lost in his thoughts.
He was not sleeping but wasn't awake either. That one day on which she hadn't turned for their engagement at the right time and had almost ruined his life was re-playing in his mind again and over again.
And that was making him upset, irked and angry.
Raman aap yahan kyun late gaye...mujhe laga tha aap kaam karke sone aayenge, he heard her and saw her coming towards him.
(Raman why are you lying here...i thought you would come to sleep after finishing the work, he heard her and saw her coming towards him.)
At this time, he definitely didn't want to see her and here she was coming close to him.
Main aapka wait karte karte so hi gayi...abhi aankh khuli toh dekha aap hain hi nahi ander, she sat on the same sofa on which he was lying close enough that some parts of her touched him.
(I even slept while waiting for you...i woke up now and realized that you were not in the room, she sat on the same sofa on which he was lying close enough that some parts of her touched him. )
Getting uncomfortable or rather angry with her closeness, he got up with a jerk and left for the kitchen leaving her confused.
Not realizing or rather intentionally ignoring the fact that he didn't want to see her; she followed him to the kitchen to welcome the worst.
Raman are you ok...kuch hua hai kya aapko...aap aaye kyun nahi sone, she continued to question him.
(Raman are you ok...has something happened to you...why didn't you come for sleeping, she continued to question him.)
He who didn't want to tell her what had happened to him for obvious reasons chose to remain silent but she was just hitting the wrong string again and again.
Raman aap sun rahe hain main kya puch rahi hoon, she held his hand in hers.
(Raman are you listening to me...i am asking something, she held his hand in hers.)
Tumhari problem kya hai...dikh nahi raha hai ki main nahi baat karna chah raha hoon...mujhe office ke liye nikalna hai please disturb mat karo, he finally lashed out at her.
(What the hell is your problem...can't you see I am in no mood of talking...I need to leave for the office so please don't disturb me, he finally lashed out at her.)
Lekin Raman, she tried to speak but he left freeing his hand from hers before she could even complete.
(But Raman, she tried to speak but he left freeing his hand from hers before she could even complete.)
Yeh Raman ko kya ho gaya achanak...ek ghante pehle kitne ache mood mein the...kitne khush the...main kitni khush thi...aur ab...phir wahi gairon jaisa bartaav...mujhe khushi di hi thi Raman toh use mere paas rehne bhi toh dete kuch pal, she wiped off her flowing tears on seeing him coming out of the room.
(What happened to Raman suddenly...he was in such a good mood just an hour back...he was so happy...and so i was happy too...and now...the same old strangers type behavior...if you made me happy Raman then you could have let me stay happy for some moments atleast, she wiped off her flowing tears on seeing him coming out of the room.)
She ran after him but he left the house slamming the door at her face before she could stop him.
Pal Bhar Thehar Jao
Dil Yeh Sambhal Jaaye
Kaise Tumhe Roka Karun
(Hold on for few seconds so that my heart can handle itself...how do i stop you)
Kyun aapko samajh nahi aata Raman ki aapke aise behavior se mujhe kitni takleef hoti hai...apna sab kuch toh kho chuki hoon main apni yaadash ke saath...sabko bhul chuki hoon khud ko bhul chuki hoon...bas koi yaad hai toh aap... aap saath hote hain toh jaise lagta hai sab thik hai par phir aapki aisi baatein dil todd deti hain...bahut dard hota hai Raman...aapko aisa dekhke bhi aur yeh sochke bhi ki mujhe pata tak nahi ki aap mujhse kyun naaraz hain...mat kariye aap aisa...aap hi ek hain jiske sahare main is nayi zindagi mein aage badh sakti hoon...shayad aap hi ke liye maut ke muh se wapis aayi hoon...aap saath hain toh sab thik hai warna kuch hai hi nahi
(Why don't you understand Raman how much your this behavior hurts me...i have lost everything of mine with my memory...i have forgotten everything...i have forgotten myself...the only thing I remember is you...when you are with me i feel everything is fine but such things break my heart...it really pains Raman...seeing you like this and thinking that I don't even know what I did to earn this from you...please don't do this to me...you are the only one with the support of whom i can lead this new life...maybe i have survived the death just for you...if you there then everything is fine otherwise there is nothing)
Meri Taraf Aata
Har Gham Fisal Jaaye
Aankhon Mein Tumko Bharun
(Every pain coming towards me slips as I fill my eyes only with you)
Bin Bole Baatein Tumse Karun
(I talk to you without words)
Agar Tum Saath Ho
Agar Tum Saath Ho
(If you are with me)
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He sat in his car and hit the steering angrily taking out the anger for the mess his life had become. It was nothing more than just a conundrum where he was dangling between two different Ishitas.
One who had hurt him in a way that he could never come over and the other one whom he was hurting unwantedly.
He knew the Ishita of today needed him. He knew she was dreaming of a new and normal life with him. And she was upset when he was not fulfilling those dreams.
Teri Nazron Mein Hain Tere Sapne
Tere Sapnon Mein Hai Naaraazi
(Your eyes have dreams but your dreams have anger)
But how could he step into a new life when he had a heavy baggage from previous life to carry. But how could he forget the Ishita who had given him so much pain. But how could he fulfill someone else's dreams when his own dreams were shattered to death.
He was betrayed once and had no strength to get betrayed yet again.
Mujhe Lagta Hai Ki
Baatein Dil Ki
Hoti Lafzon Ki Dhokebaazi
(I feel the talks of heart are nothing but betrayal of words)
The presence of this Ishita didn't matter much as the Ishita he had loved had put him down.
Tum Saath Ho Ya Na Ho
Kya Phark Hai
(It does not matter if you are with me or not)
Jaanta hoon Ishita tumhe hurt kar raha hoon...par tumhe koi khushi kaise dun jab mere paas koi khushi hai hi nahi...hum wahi toh de sakte hain na jo humare paas hota hai...meri khushiyaan toh tumhare saath thi na Ishita...par tumne unhe shuru hone se pehle hi mujhse cheen liya...meri toh zindagi jaisi thi waisi hi reh gayi...akeli aur khaali, he too wiped his tears and started the car.
(I know Ishita I am hurting you...but how do i give you happiness when i don't have any with me...we can only give what we have with us...my happiness was with you...but you snatched them from me even before it began...my life remained the way it was...lonely and empty, he too wiped his tears and started the car.)
Bedard Thi Zindagi
Bedard Hai
Agar Tum Saath Ho
Agar Tum Saath Ho
(The life was painful and so it is now no matter if you are with me or not)
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After about 2 hours from the decided time when few of the guests had even started to leave, she made her entry to the engagement hall.
All the eyes which should have been happy to see her were now tensed. The day which was supposed to be the happiest had now some feels of embarrassment mixed in it.
So many guests had taunted Mr. Bhalla and Mr. Iyyer for the delay caused in the engagement. So many gossips too were floating around the hall and why wouldn't; bride missing from her own engagement was no small issue after all.
Shayad ladki ko ladka pasand nahi hoga...maa baap ne zor zabardasti ki hogi islie bhaag gayi...kya pata ladki ka kisi aur se chakkar ho...arre kya pata ladki ko pata chala ho ki ladke ka kisi aur se chakkar hai islie bechari bach nikli ho, he had heard so many people giving their opinion and it had hurt him deep inside.
(Maybe the bride does not like the groom and her parents might have forced her so she ran away...who knows if she has affair with someone else...but maybe the guy has some affair and she came to know and so ran to save her life, he had heard so many people giving their opinion and it had hurt him deep inside.)
And that was not letting him smile on seeing her even though he had waited for this moment for so long.
She was looking breathtaking and yet he couldn't compliment her because anger was overpowering love.
Ishu beta kahan thi ab tak tum...hum kabse wait kar rahe hain...tum thik ho na beta, tensed Appa asked.
(Ishu dear where were you till now...we are waiting for so long...are you fine dear, tensed Appa asked.)
Appa I am really sorry...mujhe aapse do minute baat karni hai please aap side aaiye na mere saath, she requested.
(Appa I am really sorry...i need to talk to you urgently so please come with me aside, she requested)
Aiyo yeh baat waat sab baad mein...abhi pehle tum chalo...Raman aur sab log kabse wait kar rahe hain engagement ke liye, a worried Amma spoke.
(No no please talk later...first you come...Raman and everyone is waiting for engagement, a worried Amma spoke.)
Amma please do minute meri baat sun toh lijiye, she again requested.
(Amma listen to me for two minutes atleast, she again requested.)
Kya baat hai Ishita beta...tum toh itni samajhdaar ho phir aaj kyun aise behave kar rahi ho...ek toh tum late ho aur upar se ab tum baat karna chahti ho...please beta yahan bahut guests hain...hum aaj already insult ho chuke hain ab aur insult mat karwao humari, Appa requested his daughter.
(What is it Ishita...you are so matured then why you are behaving like this today...first you came late and now you want to talk...please dear there are so many guests...we are already insulted today and now please don't get us insulted more, Appa requested his daughter.)
Appa Amma aap log kyun nahi samajh rahe hain...mera baat karna zaruri hai aap dono se, Ishita again tried to convince her parents.
(Appa Amma why you both are not understanding...it is really important for me to talk to you both, Ishita again tried to convince her parents.)
Jo baat karni hai engagement ke baad ghar jaake karna, Amma angrily ordered this time.
(Talk whatever you want to after we reach home after the engagement, Amma angrily ordered this time.)
Amma main yeh engagement karna hi nahi chahti hoon, finally she let it out.
(Amma I don't want this engagement, finally she let it out.)
He who was coming close to her to compliment her leaving aside all his anger broke into pieces on hearing those words from her.
He felt as if his world crashed, his breaths stopped and his heart stopped beating.
Ishita tumhe pata bhi hai tum kya bol rahi ho, Appa asked angrily this time.
(Ishita do you even know what you are speaking, Appa asked angrily this time.)
Yes Appa I know main kya keh rahi hoon...aap please samajhiye, Ishita pleaded.
(Yes Appa I know what I am saying, please understand, Ishita pleaded.)
Vishwa dekh liya aapke laad pyaar ka nateeja...main kehti thi ek din yeh ladki humari naak kataegi aur dekh lijiye aa gaya woh din, Amma started cursing Appa.
(Vishwa are you seeing the result of your over pampering...i had warned you that this girl will bring disgrace to us and see today the day has come, Amma started cursing Appa.)
Ek second Madhu tum chup rahogi...main baat kar raha hoon na, Appa tried to take the control in his hands.
(One second Madhu...will you remain silent...I am talking to her so please let me talk, Appa tried to take the control in his hands.)
And while these three were arguing, he was battling with a broken heart.
Maa main yeh sagai nahi karna chahta, he somehow told his mother.
(Maa I don't want to get engaged, he somehow told his mother.)
Haaye main mar jaun...yeh kya bol raha hai tu Raman...agar tere papa ji ne sun liya toh tujhe aur mujhe dono ko yahi maar daalenge, Toshi Ji reacted to the grave shock her son gave her.
(Oh my god...what are you saying Raman...if your father hears this then he will kill us both, Toshi Ji reacted to the grave shock her son gave her.
Maa main sach mein yeh sagai nahi karna chahta, he again spoke hiding his tears and trying to act normal.
(Maa I seriously don't want this engagement to happen, he again spoke hiding his tears and trying to act normal.)
Raman tujhe kya ho gaya achanak puttar...tu toh kitna khush tha na...Ishita tujhe kitni pasand bhi aayi thi...phir achanak kya hua Puttar, Toshi Ji tried to confront her son.
(Raman what happened to you suddenly...you were so happy right...You liked Ishita so much then what happened suddenly son, Toshi Ji tried to confront her son.)
Woh sab main aapko baad mein bataunga...abhi main yeh sagai nahi karunga bas, he strictly declared.
(I will tell all that to you later...as of now I won't get engaged and that's it, he strictly declared.)
Dekh Raman yahan bade log aaye hain...tere papa ji bilkul bardaash nahi karenge ki koi unke naam pe ungli uthaaye...jo bhi baat hai hum baad mein baithke suljha lenge...abhi yeh sagai ho jaane de puttar, Toshi Ji tried to explain her son.
(Look Raman there are so many guests here...You father will not at all bear any defame to his name...whatever the matter is we will sort it out later...let this engagement take place now son, Toshi Ji tried to explain her son.)
Lekin maa, he tried to protest.
(But Maa, he tried to protest.)
Raman jo tune aaj sagai nahi ki toh tu mera mara muh dekhega, Toshi Ji silenced her son and left from there leaving Raman hopelessly baffled.
(Raman if you don't get engaged today then you will see me dead, Toshi Ji silenced her son and left from there leaving Raman hopelessly baffled.)
Dekho Ishita jo bhi baat hai hum ghar jaake karenge par abhi agar tumne yeh engagement nahi ki toh aaj se tumhara aur mera Rishta khatam, Appa spoke to her daughter in a high pitch for the first time.
(Look Ishita whatever the issue is we will discuss after going back home but if you don't let this engagement happen now then your relation with me ends right now, Appa spoke to her daughter in a high pitch for the first time.)
And that is how they got engaged unwillingly and forcibly. The day for which they had waited for so long was no less than a curse today. They entered a relation which none of them wanted now.
Yesterday it was something else and today it was nothing...just nothing
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A loud horn from the truck behind him brought him out of the flashback. The reminiscing of those moments pricked him yet again and the pain came out in the form of rash driving.
With eyes deep red as blood, forehead covered with sweat and trembling lips, he opened the door of his cabin and reached out to the diary immediately knowing that only that diary of hers could calm him down.
Because the diary caged the original Ishita he had fallen in love with. And if she was with him, all the pain was nothing but hopes and happiness.
Agar Tum Saath Ho Dil Yeh Sambhal Jaaye
(My heart settles if you are with me)
Agar Tum Saath Ho Har Gham Fisal Jaaye
(All the pain slips away if you are with me)
Agar Tum Saath Din Yeh Nikal Jaaye
(The day passes by if you are with me)
Agar Tum Saath Har Gham Fisal Jaaye
(All the pain slips away if you are with me)
Bindi
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Jodha Akbar
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