New Ishra FF: Thodi Si Bewafai Part 15 On Page 132 - Page 37

Good morning, she said while rubbing her eyes drowsily and coming towards him in the kitchen.

Morning, he greeted her with a blank face.

Ishita: Kab uthe aap

(When did you wake up)

Raman: Kuch der pehle

(A while ago)

Ishita: bell baji thi kya

(Did the bell ring)

Raman: Nahi toh

(No)

Ishita: I don't know...mujhe laga aisa

(I don't know...i felt so)

Raman: Kal raat maine bahut der tak bell bajayi thi...wahi baj rahi hogi tumhare kaanon mein

(I rang the bell for long last night...that might be resonating in your ears)

Kya Raman aap bhi na, she said happily on getting a light reply from her husband for the first time in past two days.

(Raman you are just, she said happily on getting a light reply from her husband for the first time in past two days.)

Waise aap kitchen mein kya kar rahe ho, she asked while tying her long tresses in a lose bun.

(By the way what are you doing inside the kitchen, she asked while tying her long tresses in a lose bun.)

Chai...tum logi, he asked.

(Tea...will you have, he asked)

Yet another shock, her bitter gourd husband was offering her tea that too made all by himself. Which wife would want to miss that opportunity..!!

Khushi se lungi, she replied and left for the balcony with a slight desire in her heart of enjoying the early morning tea with her husband in the open.

(I will take happily, she replied and left for the balcony with a slight desire in her heart of enjoying the early morning tea with her husband in the open.)

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As soon as she vacated the kitchen, he dimmed the flame and ran to the hall. He picked up the diary that he had slipped under the sofa and hid it in his laptop bag.

Once it was done, he sighed in relief as cutely as a baby would after hiding a test paper from his mother.

Raman chai nahi hui kya ab tak...main aaun kisi help ke liye, he heard her shouting though politely and so ran back to the kitchen.

(Raman isn't the tea ready already...shall I come for help, he heard her shouting though politely and so ran back to the kitchen.)

Hurriedly he filtered the tea in two cups and made his way to the balcony.

Yeh lo, he said giving her a cup of tea.

(Have it, he said giving her a cup of tea.)

She happily accepted assuming that he would sit after giving her the cup.

But that didn't happen and he started to leave until she stopped him.

Ishita: Kahan jaa rahe ho

(Where are you going)

Raman: Ander

(Inside)

Ishita: Yahan baith ke peete hain na chai...kitna acha lag raha hai...subah ki chamakti dhoop aur in panchiyon ki chehakti dhun

(Let's sit here and have tea...it is go good here...the early morning's bright sun and the tune of birds' chirping)

Raman: Mujhe kaam hai ander

(I have work inside)

Ishita: Please Raman...for me

He sat there with her not having a rude heart to refuse boldly.

They didn't talk, they didn't hug, they didn't share tea from a single cup and yet there was romance.

She was smiling and staring at a couple in the opposite balcony who were also seated like them to have tea but more than the tea they were having a dose of early morning romance.

He was smiling looking at her and lost in his own world.

Udhar dekha aapne, she asked excitedly breaking his trail of thoughts.

(Did you see there, she asked excitedly breaking his trail of thoughts.)

Kya, he asked dazed.

(What, he asked dazed.)

Arre woh dekho na, she said cutely pointing out at the lovey-dovey couple in front of them.

(Arre look there, she said cutely pointing out at the lovey-dovey couple in front of them.)

His sight traveled to the couple who were in each other's arms and that reminded him about the weirdly beautiful position that they woke up in this morning.

He wanted to ask her directly but didn't have the right words. Had it been a normal relation, there wasn't even a need to ask but here when there was nothing called intimacy, questions did arise in his mind.

Raman: Ishita

Ishita: Hmm

Raman: Kuch puchna tha tumse

(I needed to ask something)

Ishita: Puchiye na

(Ask me)

Raman: You were comfortable last night right

A boring dinner followed by a silent drive and then him carrying her to the bedroom in his arms were the only few things she could recall from the last night.

And that made her think, he was asking about her comfort in his arms, at his touches.

So cute you are Raman, she happily thought before answering him.

Ishita: aise kyun puch rahe ho

(Why are you asking this)

Raman: No I just mean

Ishita: I was very comfortable Raman

Kya pagal aurat hai yeh...aise kaise kisi ke upar soke comfortable ho sakti hai...such an idiot, he thought.

(What a mad woman she is...how she can be comfortable sleeping over someone...such an idiot, he thought.)

Are you sure, he asked again to clarify.

Yes Raman I am very sure, she replied confidently surprising him yet again.

Kya tum humesha hi aise soti ho, he asked a little clearer this time.

(Do you sleep like this always, he asked a little clearer this time.)

But as they say we only understand what we want to, she thought he was asking her about the sleep she caught in the car.

Depends on the mood Raman, she replied.

Mood...is she mad...kal mood tha toh aadhi mere upar thi...aaj mood hoga toh puri mere upar hogi, he thought and cursed her replies in his mind.

(Mood...is she mad...yesterday she slept half on me as per her mood...today she might sleep completely on me, he thought and cursed her replies in his mind.)

It was pointless to interrogate her further as she had lost it, he concluded and left from there to get ready.

Yeh inko kya ho gaya...ajeeb se hi hain...restaurant mein mera mood off kiya tabhi toh main car mein so gayi warna mujhe kya shauk hai chalti car mein sone ka, she blabbered and made her way to the kitchen.

(What happened to him...he is a little weird...he ruined my mood in the restaurant that's why I slept in the car otherwise who would want to sleep in the car, she blabbered and made her way to the kitchen.)

He always had reasons to leave for office early lately and today was again a similar day. Not the meetings, not the presentations but that one diary was forcing him to leave for office as soon as possible.

While he got ready for the office, she cooked some breakfast with the help of recipes from Google.

He came out ready to leave but sat back for the breakfast for her happiness. He ate as fast as he could and left leaving her all confused.

Bhaag ke toh aise gaye hain jaise inke jaaye bina shehar hi tham jaega, she said angrily irked at his hurry and made her way to the bathroom to carry on her bath and stuff.

(He has run away as if the city was not moving until he left, she said angrily irked at his hurry and made her way to the bathroom to carry on her bath and stuff.)

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He took in some fresh air calmly after settling on the side sofa in his cabin.

A do not disturb board was already put outside his cabin as soon as he had entered in. All his meetings for the day had been canceled and his phone was handed over to his secretary with clear instructions to not bug him until the call was either from his mother or Ishita.

God please forgive me for doing this, he said and opened the diary.

The first left page of the diary had a picture of her with her Amma and Appa. The picture must have been clicked when she would have been probably 3-4 days old. The right first page read "Beautiful me in this beautiful world".

A smile spread over his face immediately as he read that message and caressed that picture.

Maintaining that smile, he flipped onto the next page and what he saw increased his smile so wide that his lips pained a little at the sudden stretch.

There was a picture of him and her from their first meet. He laughed recalling how his mother had taken that picture without letting them know. She looked in some random direction biting her lips and he looked at her with his eyes wide open. He could not stop himself from kissing that picture of theirs.

The right side of the page again had a message which read "I always thought I was beautiful. He makes me feel I am desirable. He is here to make my life beautiful".

He just didn't know how he was supposed to react. She had declared her love for him on their first date but it didn't show any depth. Anyone could have reacted to the emotions he had radiated that day and accepted his love.

But these few words that he read just now defined her intensity of love for him.

He was elated to know about it but now at the same time it hurt him even more. If she really loved him so much then how could she give up her love so easily? Was love a mere word for her which she used one day and forgot another day.

Did he have no effect on her?

Why on earth did she do this, he held his head tight unable to bear the havoc all those questions were creating inside him.

And sometime later, not having any power left to think of any more possibilities, he chose to read ahead.

He turned another page and got engrossed in reading the beautiful words shining there.

"Unveiling Myself"

I am Ishita Iyyer. Oops sorry only Ishita. Iyyer will change in sometime so it is better I am known as Ishita.

I don't know why I am writing this diary. It is just that sometimes I feel a need to let out what I feel, what I want and what I have got.

I never had a best friend with whom I could share my heart.

Appa is very close but still not the one who can be a part of my childhood mischiefs, teenage secrets and adulthood love story. Ofcourse he couldn't be the one.

Amma would be the last person I will think of considering the hype she creates for anything and everything.

So here I am, left with pen and paper.

And why not, a diary is the safest place to unveil your mystics.

Tomorrow if I am not there to explain myself, atleast my diary will be able do it for me because my diary will be the only one who will know the real me.

I might put on a mask for this world whenever needed but I will always be true here.

I will be a purified version of myself here.

-Impure Ishita

One page ended and with that he was sure of a fact. He was going to walk a journey on which he was going to explore a new Ishita, the unplugged one, pure like a fetus and clear like a glass.