Song dedication: Kaun Mera - Special 26
Illusion - Zedd (feat. Echosmith)
As hard as I try I find myself to be very Indian in my mentality. Maybe it's the judgment in me and maybe I'm still evolving and maybe that's good. As a teen I believed that relationships were the thing that you needed to have - the innumerous flings that you had, the countless unnamed escapades and the higher the number was the better it was. You know, scandalous. That has been a part of me I believe - being scandalous.
I'm a picky reader. I find it easy to dissect and predict plots, judge heroines and hero's times and over until I find a flaw or mischaracterization about them. To me, it's what I call normal. It's not a good habit or a bad habit either. It helps me segregate what I read and what I don't and the best part is to not hurt anyone with your harsher views of their works. It works, at times.
Despite all the self-introduction the fact remains that I love this fiction. I breathe this fiction and love the way you've penned it turning meager day-to-day activities into something splendid. I love that the characters are realistic and can be approached with rational thought. I love Ishita for standing strong despite everything and I love the mentality here. At the end of the day it's not about who you slept with, how you slept with or how many times you slept with; it's about knowing yourself, knowing your priorities' and respecting your body. No one can be the judge of that but you.
I love the character of Raman - such men don't exist real life or I have lived my life surrounded by assholes. Men like him are beautiful, flawed yet beautiful.
Yes, I find this FF at times hard to digest. I find myself questioning the very mentality I have instilled in myself or rather have let the people surrounding me instill in me be it my parents, friends or any one else. We have this strict rigid confinement that we choose to bind ourselves in and once someone or anyone escapes the shackles and try to build a live for themselves we crush them be it to be an example to set order or just distaste.
I like to think I'm modern but I'm not. Unlike Raman and so very unlike Ishita I'm not a risk-taker. I'm your Mihika, I'm the anti-relationship, prioritizing and over-analyzing Mihika you have your Ishita describe. I lack trust like you Ishita does. And I fail to love like your Raman does. And there, I connect with your story. I'm your Raman who is nice but below his nicette' it's not because he's nice but because he wants to feel nice to himself and does so by acting nice to the world. I'm your Raman when he cares for Ishita, Ruhi and his mother because there he really does care. I'm your Shagun when I need to present myself to the world.
She did love him, you know. Or she didn't and it hits me, who would she choose to keep the child he desperately loved never once telling him that watching his child grow in her killed her ever moment. She is the mother. She wanted to win against the odds. Why did she keep Raman away? Was it because she wanted to keep the experience to herself or simply because she wanted to pull a KKHH on him?
I get your Subbu because since the time I saw my first couple date (fourth grade) and till today as I see my friends date I notice one thing in common - the guys around me are Subbu. The thing I don't get is why wouldn't he marry Ishita? She was educated, well-off, pretty and his fianc. What made him not marry her?
There are so many things that I want to know and so many things I wish to know. Contrary to my previous replies I don't want to see Subbu return, I don't want him to try to woo Ishita back or try to gain custody of his child. I don't want him. I don't want to see him appear or anything else because for once it isn't about being the better one, instead it's about family, love and companionship the family of four share. It's about Raman, Ruhi, Ishita and their unborn family member.
It's about happiness and contentment; and I am so proud to be a part of this journey.
Yours truly,
Kiara
P.S. Subbu's aunt says that Ishita-Subbu broke it off three months ago (12 weeks) but in a later chapter Ishita tells the doctor she's 7 weeks pregnant. Is there something I'm missing out on? Or did you decrease the pregnancy duration so that it fits because I think Ruhi is three - four months old (12-16 weeks) so that gives Ishita-Raman around 5-9 weeks to conceive a second child in the societal point of view. Or maybe I just misread. I don't have a working internet connection atm to cross check.
Edited by AraBearxx - 10 years ago
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