Gan, thank you for this space. The drama for the sake of TRPs is indeed a bit much, but what surprised me today, is that I didn't mind it because I saw past it all and was able to focus on IshRa (I really do think I have blinders on when I watch this show...or maybe I have eyes only for RKB...😳).
I have to take a moment and talk about Adi for a second. I have no idea what happened yesterday since I didn't watch the episode, but my heart hurt for this kid & his dadi today. I have said everything that can be said about Adi in the post I made last week regarding him and Raman, but this kid's bruised psyche really gets to me. My heart aches for him because he believes his mother is his only family...and sadly, she's too vain to give him the time and attention he needs. The kid feels alone, abandoned by his family...and I wanna pull him into a bone crushing hug and tell him that that is not the case.
Toshi's heartbreak was palpable. She and RKB are two peas in a pod when it comes to Adi.
Lately, I think he's becoming a weakness of mine as well.
"For nothing is so hard to hear as that which is half known, and evaded. One never denies so hotly as in denying to one's self what one fears is true, and one never resents so bitterly as in resenting that which one cannot say one has the right to resent."
Susan Glaspell
This quote sums it up for me when it comes to Shagun. She initially mistrusts Ashok, but in the middle of it all, she realizes what the consequences of her mistrust will be - she'll lose out on the one thing she's been holding on to for 6 years. If she loses out now, then having left Raman, who is now everything she could have ever wanted, is all in vain. And so, as they say, ignorance is bliss. She'll continue to live in denial because if its true, her worst fears will come true. We all know that RKB is afraid of the idea of being alone...today, I see that Shagun is too. She walked out on the one good thing she had, and now, if she loses Ashok, she'll be left with nothing...no one. Raman's moved on, and despite her consoling herself saying that he's still in love with her and doesn't share a relationship with his wife, she knows that's not true. I think a part of her does resent having left RKB...I think she realizes all to well what she lost...sad thing is, she has only herself to blame. When RKB realized and admitted his love for Ishita to himself, he was able to convince Mihir that Shagun deserves her chance at happiness too. Today Shagun is realizing that RKB has found his way out of the mess she left him in all those years ago...and if she loses out on this marriage, she will have face the consequences of her actions 6 years ago head on.
What scary for us, however, is that Shagun will stop at nothing to get what she wants...even if she has to stand on Ishita's morals and IshRa's relationship to get it. I understand her insecurities, but I don't think for a second that all of this is going to make her see the error of her ways.
IshRa
"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage." - Lao Tzu
"How can love be worthy of its name if one selects solely the pretty things and leaves out the hardships? It is easy to enjoy the good and dislike the bad. Anybody can do that. The real challenge is to love the good and the bad together, not because you need to take the rough with the smooth but because you need to go beyond such descriptions and accept love in its entirety."
Elif Shafak
***
Tu dhaar hai nadiya ki, main tera kinaara hoon
Tu mera sahaara hai, main tera sahaara hoon
Aankhon mein samandar hai, aashaaon ka paani hai
Zindagi aur kuch bhi nahin
Teri meri kahaani hai
Ek pyar ka nagma hai
Toofaan to aana hai, aakar chale jaana hai
Baadal hai yeh kuch pal ka, chhaakar dhal jaana hai
Parchhaaniyan reh jaati, reh jaati nishaani hai
Zindagi aur kuch bhi nahin
Teri meri kahaani hai
Ek pyar ka nagma hai, maujon ki ravaani hai
Zindagi aur kuch bhi nahin
Teri meri kahaani hai
Ek pyar ka nagma hai
***
Despite the scream-fest today, all that stood out for me was IshRa. A lot was going on simultaneously: a marriage built on deceit and facade was crumbling, a young couple in love stood at the crossroads of their relationship, accusations were being thrown left, right, center.
Despite the accusations, the one relationship that had its validity, truth, questioned, was theone that stood strengthened.
The look that Ishita shot Raman when Mihika told them she couldn't tell them because she didn't want to cause a rift between them. That silent, split-second exchange between them cannot be overlooked. Their younger siblings couldn't come to them with their problems because they were too caught up in their own arguments. [Guilt.] What occurs to me is that these two are perhaps more similar than they realize. They give their all for the ones they love - put every member of their family before themselves, and it's been this way for them individually even before their marraige - so why would it be any different now? We've heard him voice it before - because of the issues in their family, something or another always coming up, they've been unable to focus on each other - and their relationship. Ironic then, is it not, that this relationship that's worked harder to help cultivate all the other relationships around them, stands the strongest in the room today.
The look of death that he shot at Shagun when she accused Ishita of being jealous - questioning the validity of IshRa's relationship. This isn't the first time the truth of their relationship has been dragged out into the open...but perhaps for the first time, what's perceived as the truth, all the accusations, are false.
There was something about the way he stood up for his wife today - we've seen him stand a silent spectator before. We've seen him choose his past over his present. A few days ago, we saw him finally take a stand when it came to Adi's disapproval of her. It was huge because Adi is his sole weakness. So if he can stand by Ishita when Adi is in the other corner [I'm not saying he's choosing Ishita over Adi], it comes as no surprise that he would stand by her no matter what they're up against.
What struck me today, is that he was, for the most part, composed - until her morality and character were in question. The day they shattered her self-respect at the bachelor party, he couldn't set them straight the way he would have wanted to, for then, offering moral support was more important. But today - this was a husband refusing to let anyone get away with demoralizing his wife. That day, he built her back up in the privacy of their bedroom...but today, he took a stand for her, and built her back up in a room full of people. Reminding her of her self-worth, reminding her that she's too good for them...by relaying to her her the place she holds in his life. He's declared her as his wife with a sense of finality before...today, his words, his actions, finally proved it.
***
Love,
P
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