The tragedy of life is not death but what we let die inside of us. - Page 2

Originally posted by: loveabletwinz

Ahhh! Shiva!!!!!

Your posts are beautiful and so brilliantly thought out!!! Thank you SO much for sharing your thoughts and for giving us an avenue to discuss this aspect of Raman and Ishita's relationship. [Thank you so much dear😊]

I agree, Raman has gone on far too long playing the victim card and mourning as if he is the only one with a burden to carry. I think all of us on this forum can agree that Raman can be very crass and disrespectful. I don't think any one of us supports him when he puts up this carnal, feral front and I don't think Ishita is one to ignore it either. I know that your post is mostly a response in disdain of Raman's actions, but I want to take a defense for Ishita here.

As much as we despise it when Raman simply consigns Ishita to a glorified nanny status, the truth is that, Ishita also feels like this is her sole purpose (besides being the daughter in law to the Bhalla family). Ishita does not expect anything else from Raman. She has seen this raging, untamed version of Raman before marriage and knows very well that he isn't about to change...not on his own, and she has made peace with it, but not before presenting a final caveat to Raman. We see that when Ishita tells him today that he needs to set his priorities straight, and also implies that she will not stand to be used as a pawn in his desire to call checkmate on Shagun and Ashok. [BANG ON!👏 but it's also quite evident that, Ishu ki dil melts 1000 times more easily than Raman's. Which means, she will probably allow herself to be shun down by Raman.]

I think that is pretty evident when Ishita tells Raman,

"Aap apne agendas clear kyun nahi kar dete life ke...aditya ko khush rakna hai...shagun ko pareshan karna hai ...actually apko apni poori life auro ki reactions pe jeeni hai."

We already know that Ishita isn't one to take Raman's badgering comments and insults lightly, and we have seen her stand up for herself plenty of times. Like I mentioned once before on this forum, some battles are just not worth fighting. I feel like Ishita is choosing the battles she wants to fight, and she has made peace with the fact that Raman can tend to be an insensitive jerk, but she will not allow it to come in the way of nurturing Ruhi and providing her a loving home to grow in. She isn't weak, or passive, she is purposefully choosing to overlook it, while still holding her own in this relationship. We have seen this side of Ishita plenty of times. [100% AGREED.👍🏼 Ishu is most certainly not someone who would take the bashing without giving back her fair share, she's a tigress for sure. But in most cases, though she lashes back, she had never neglected Raman or put him down before anyone. She too gets says things in hastily but when she knows she's at fault, she doesnt hesitate to go & apologize which I suppose gives her a balance unlike Raman - THE MAJOR DIFFERENCE IN ISHRA]

So that was my defense for Ishita. About Raman, I agree...I think your thoughts resonate well with the rest of us and completely agree. There is no glorification in the way Raman acts, and is definitely not the character trait of a hero. But I guess that is why this show is as intriguing as it is...the wait to watch and see Raman change, because there will certainly be a moment when Raman realizes he has been wrong all along to hold on to his false perspective and ideas.

Originally posted by: aimf

A really passionate and honest post.

Originally posted by: canuck-umz

What gets to me the most is the fact that Raman plays the victim card, like you said and fails to realize that his life is so much better than others. He told Shagun that he used to wear glasses, no Raman you are still wearing tainted glasses, you are more blind now than when you were in love. [either that or his just refusing to open his eyes]

In my opinion, Ishita's life has been much more miserable than Raman's. While Raman has brought most of his misery upon himself due to his negative thinking, Ishita's problems were due to external issues. Raman's wife cheated and left him, taking his son away but he has a large, supportive family and a loving daughter. Ishita on the other hand cannot conceive, the man she loved and was engaged to left her because of that, she was turned down by other suitors because of that same reason, then she was denied adoption, and has been constantly ridiculed by others for her inability to get married or have children, next she sacrificed herself getting married to a man who only uses her for his own gains. Ishita continues to have a positive outlook on life, finding happiness where she can. So who really is the victim here? [BANG ON!👏 Simply BRILLIANT👏 100& AGREED]

I can understand Raman is a broken man but at least do not attribute your mistakes to Ishita, disregard her contributions in improving your life, and manhandling her. [My sentiments exactly! Just because you are hurt, you decide to hurt her as well. NO DAMN WAY! You just can't go around inflicting pain to others just because you are in pain. This I believe, can NEVER be JUSTIFIED!]

Originally posted by: TanniSDaya

As usual, great post Shiva.

I totally agree that being always nice is dangerous. It's time for Ishita to do something that would hurt that selfish Raman and break him to pieces from where he can't even get back one single part of his past.

Originally posted by: .ProperPatola.

Bang on! Great Post!

I agree with what you said that sometimes being too nice is dangerous...A nice person needs to avoid being a Kathputli in the name of respect for relationships. Seriously, Ishita has had enough of the garbage thrown at her by Bhalla family and she is only there for Ruhi. But on one side I am glad that Ishita-Ruhi bond is so strong that it can't be broken by these rubbish actions by others...I wan't Ishita to be like how she was before Marriage. Its the respect she has for her new family that she is still tolerating

I have ranted enough in other posts about Raman's behaviour, dunno what else to say about him being a total ass, but would like to say this thing, not only in Raman's case but for any individual that No one NO one ever gets anything by digging out their past, Instead it makes their present worse than the hell their past was! [SPOT ON! There's a reason why they call it the 'PAST', so for crying out loud just god damn let it stay in the freaking PAST!]

And Raman needs to understand that and Act like he is the parent to Adi not the other way around!

[Bless you!👏 This is EXACTLY what's been driving me nuts. I'm always left wondering who's the parent & who's the child? when I see Raman/Adi talking. Raman seriously needs to calm the eff down with his Adi. There's no need to throw Ishu under the bus everytime just for Adi. The least Raman can do is respect Ishu in terms of being a human being. She's a living/breathing person & it's about time he treats her like one. PERIOD!

Another thing in addition to my past comment, I feel CVs need to show and bring out Ishita's past out to Raman as well, so that he realizes that he is not the only person on the earth or in his or hiss surroundings to have a dark past.

Ishita has had equal if not more troubles in her past life, and no its not a small issue of having a years of relationship broken with the man whom she loved for her life, on the day of her engagement and that her would-be- fiance could not support her in her worst times. She was not at fault at that time when she found about her infertility and she is not at fault today as well [100% AGREED, sometimes I just want Ishu to breakdown & blast Raman once & for all. And give him the silent treatment!, he will never learn if she keeps caring for him despite all his barbaric behaviors towards her.]

Originally posted by: ForbbidenLove

Thanks Tanni dear.😊 @bold: I feel like banging this Ravana Kumar's head [where all this past memory is stored] against the wall so that he will freaking forget everything!

Originally posted by: loveabletwinz

As much as we despise it when Raman simply consigns Ishita to a glorified nanny status, the truth is that, Ishita also feels like this is her sole purpose (besides being the daughter in law to the Bhalla family). Ishita does not expect anything else from Raman. She has seen this raging, untamed version of Raman before marriage and knows very well that he isn't about to change...not on his own, and she has made peace with it, but not before presenting a final caveat to Raman. We see that when Ishita tells him today that he needs to set his priorities straight, and also implies that she will not stand to be used as a pawn in his desire to call checkmate on Shagun and Ashok.

I think that is pretty evident when Ishita tells Raman,

"Aap apne agendas clear kyun nahi kar dete life ke...aditya ko khush rakna hai...shagun ko pareshan karna hai ...actually apko apni poori life auro ki reactions pe jeeni hai."

We already know that Ishita isn't one to take Raman's badgering comments and insults lightly, and we have seen her stand up for herself plenty of times. Like I mentioned once before on this forum, some battles are just not worth fighting. I feel like Ishita is choosing the battles she wants to fight, and she has made peace with the fact that Raman can tend to be an insensitive jerk, but she will not allow it to come in the way of nurturing Ruhi and providing her a loving home to grow in. She isn't weak, or passive, she is purposefully choosing to overlook it, while still holding her own in this relationship. We have seen this side of Ishita plenty of times.