Allah o Akbar
Allah o Akbar
The sweet sound of azaan and the chirping early risers had woken her up, and she was thankful that she woke up for fajr right before the sunrise.
Sitting on the green ja'namaz, covered in a white veil, hands pleading in front of the Almighty she let it all out, that was contained inside her from weeks.
Mujhe bata ke main kia karoon, main kia karoon ay mere khuda…main kia karoon
She pleaded while tears started forming in her hazel eyes. Her vision got blurry as the salty water filled her eyes. She held the tasbeeh raising her hands in unison and rested her head against the wall
Main aisa koi gunaah nahi karma chahti jis ki wajah se main khud ki nazroon mein bhi gir jaaon….main kisi ko dhoka nahi dena chaahti…main kisi ka bhi bharosa thodna nahi chahti..ay mere pak parwardigaar mujhe bata main kia karoon…mere dil mein jo hai usse nikal de yah usse mujhe de de
She sobbed as she brought her hands closer to her face wetting her hands and her white veil.
All the events from the past few weeks flashed in front of her eyes as she closed her flooded eyes letting the tear drops roll down her cotton soft cheeks.
She still remembered the day when they had come over to their house for her hand, it was a Friday and everyone had gathered right after zuhr
"Bajiii Baaajiii…unhe aap pasand ho" Maryam came running, hugged her excitedly.
A feeling of contentment ran over her as she thanked Allah for this golden day.
Amma and abba will no longer be worried from my side now
She thought to herself
It wasn't just her parent's approval but she had started to like him too. He was handsome, respectful and carried great morals.
She wiped the tear on the edge of her eye as she next remembered the cursed day
Yeh shaadi nahi hosakti… yeh shaadi mere aane wale kal ko museebat mein daal sakti hai…humari party khatre mein padh sakti hai
baji..jis din sayasat is ghar mein ayi hai usi din humara baap bhi mar gaya…aik saysat daan ne aaj aik baap ko maar diya
Maryam who humare abba hain, kuch soch kar hi yeh faisla liya hoga, aise nahi kehte unke bare mein
Ironic how she was giving her sister the consolation she needed and was making her believe something she herself didn't believe in.
"itna sab kuch hojaane ke baad bhi aap itni khamosh kaise hosakti hain?...yeh sab keh rahi hain?" Maryam asked in amusement.
Deep down inside she felt stabbed, she felt broken and betrayed. Her heart was shattered but her mind tried to calm her down and started reasoning to back her father's decision.
She got up and placed the neatly folded ja'namaz on the highest shelf beside her bed.
Wiping her tears she opened the window welcoming the day despite the occurrence of the unfortunate events
The thin line of the sun rays could be seen on the horizon. The vintage bricks of the ancestry mansion reflected the rays piercing through the huge trees that guarded the mansion.
It was a new day, Umaymah was the girl who would start her day with a fresh mind and a new hope each day becoming a better person as life surprised her. But today was different, she felt disappointed and hopeless. It was a mixture of contradictory feelings. It was weird strange and unusual for Umaymah.
As her younger sister woke with a yawn, her innocence flashed a curve on her lips. No matter how hard the times were, her little sister's innocence would always remind her of the simplicity, nature's wonders and optimism.
fikar mat karo baaji, aap ne kisi ka bura nahi socha aap ke saath bhi insaaf hoga
She has grown up so fast just yesterday she had remembered her crawling across the halls, echoing her laughter and giggles in the whole mansion and today she was standing here consoling her broken sister
Even in the times of test, when no one seemed to understand her, her sister had been by her side. She felt she had someone who she could rely on, who would provide comfort in the most rainy days
Qudrat ka sabse unmol tohfa meri Maryum
Maybe she was right, she hadn't ever even thought of giving anyone harm , let alone people ,she had sentimental attachment with plants and animals , how could she ever hurt anyone? And if she hadn't then she wouldn't be in distress for too long either
Yes that was it
A new day, with nature's comforting hands, fresh green leaves of the oldest tree peeking through the tinted windows, flowers of the spectrum, smiling upon her, her little angel by her side, His reassuring gaze that could be felt near the end of her prayer, forced her to have hope again, this time the faith more stronger, forced her to smile and yet wait for another fateful day to knock at her doorstep.
Maybe the moment she shattered, the moment she cried was all part of His plan just so she could have more faith and come out stronger from before, and it felt like she had control just by sitting on that green ja'namaz under the white veil and bringing her hands to plea, which seemed like more of a blessing as she thanked for being able to ask, for being able let it all out.
With the God's graciousness and the light of hope Umaymah crossed another turn of life, with exponentially increased faith, that she hadn't let loose in all these years of her existence.
Once again life smiled at her as she succeeded in another test. Test of faith, test of strength.
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