Escapist thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#1
The poem below is short I know like all my other poems but very dear to me...Also this is the very first time I'm experimenting with a happy poem moving away from melancholy finally ! Again this one has the setting as night, can't help it I love night and darkness more than the day as it helps me reflect back and it the only time I can hope for some solitude ! Hope you guys enjoy reading ! 😊



Summer Is Not Far Away !



The evening breeze sways,
Snapping her out of her reverie,
Reflecting back her day,
A smile retraces her way.


The countless stars in the sky,
Remind her of the hours that have gone by,
Reminiscing the past and shunning the grief,
She turns on a new leaf.


Eyeing the bright moon,
She foregoes her wistful thinking,
Seeking pardon for her sins,
She prays for a new beginning.


Taking the essence of night,
She slips into her dreamy flight,
Slowly dusk turns into dawn,
And she gleams like a newborn.

-Fatima

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Do give in your valuable comments :)

Edited by -shabnoor- - 14 years ago

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568124 thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
#2
Taking the essence of night,
She slips into her dreamy flight,

Do I know her the one who is taking the essence of the DAY and night to slip into her dreamy flight.

It was indeed a happy and a pleasant one. What does the day hold for her? Do tell.
A very nice way of structuring words and I loved the rhyme. Simple choice of words that clearly conveyed what you wanted to say. An elegant string of pearls...

Glad I got to your PM and read it at first go. Thanks.
...Maham... thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#3
Beautiful Fatima.. Writing poetry in my opinion is a different feat entirely.. Its easy to ramble in a way.. Actually writing something like this is something else.. 👏👏 for this one.. Loved the optimism.. Could extract something from it myself.. 😆
Once again really good job.. nice subject.. Moving on..
And I'm generally quite bad at commenting for some reason.. so dont hate me for being so brief..
Maham
.PixiieBunniie. thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#4
im speechless fatima di dis is sooo awesome👍🏼
thx for da PM.. keep writing🤗
AnotherAdmirer thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#5
Lovely Fatema! its a very beautiful one, and am glad you took a change and wrote this one on a happy note.

Its very...i dunno m short for words right now!
Keep Writing dear, you are Amazing🤗

-ZJ
556195 thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
#6
beautiful poem fatime
really nice
keep it up dear

Nirvrithi thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#7
Noor -beautiful 😊 and this one proves that you should really try your hands more in happy ones as well 😉
thegameison thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#8
Fatima, heyy! 🤗

Oh, how ironic! The poem perfectly matches my mood today though, the summer is indeed very far away. Its freezing in here. =D

Perfect, perfect! Extremely beautiful, or umm - subtle I should say. Its short in comparison to what I write - mine never get to the point, yours speak volumes! I am one ardent fan of yours, always ready to learn! =]


-Kankshita
..Bebolove.. thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#9
beautiful poem fatima :) keep up the hard work i know its really hard to wright a poem but still u did wow great poem!!!!!!! :)
muskanp thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#10
loved it...
finally a happy haapy one
me so so happy

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