Hey people I am back again with my another pakao os..this os is based on the current sidyali track, so here it goes :-
Chapter 1
I will never ever forgive myself , how could I be so blind like any other girl in love and fell for him? I was ready sid to support you and to fight against all obstacles , all my friends told me to stay away from you, they all warned me about you but I stood by you, I told them that you had changed, you were not the one anymore who made my life and others' life difficult , I assured them that you were better person than before , I also told them that you were only hiding yourself behind a fake image..you were just as good as anyone of us but you proved me wrong sid in front of all my friends. You broke my trust , in a single day you had given me world's best and worst feelings in my life. How didn't I see that I was just a victim of your dirty games...how could you be so heartless? One day I myself told everyone that I would never choose you even if you were the last man alive in the world but the truth was even if the world was filled with billion and you were not one of them then I would rather prefer to stay alone forever. How can everything is a lie? Would you do so much just to make me fall in love with you? No no these are all not making any sense to me. I have seen love in your eyes for me sid. I noticed how you always there for me whenever I needed any help, you helped me without any conditions. I saw you crying when Charlie was talking about his father's short height , was that fake act too? Just to make me fall in love would be dancing in that attire in front of all and didn't care about what other might have to say? But on the other hand I can't possibly find a reason that can somehow prove your innocence...I can still hear my heart telling me that there must be a reason behind your certain action but what that can be? Why my heart can't just accept that you have faked it all this time..that's it, enough is enough , I have got already enough heartache , I opened the door of my heart to let you in and you broke it like it meant nothing to you. Now this broken heart can never be fixed again. You made me so small that now I have started to hate looking myself at mirror . I don't know the pain is caused by you will ever be lessen or not ...if only sid you had proved me right then I would not have cared about anyone's opinion , we could have fought against all together . Siyali kept crying and blaming herself for being a fool in love , yes she had done her bewakoofiyaan in love for trusting sid over her friends . Siyali stood up from the ground but the tears didn't stop to fall down from her eyes , she knew that she was not getting any sleep that night , all those flashbacks of her first kiss were started to appear in her mind , she wanted to cry her heart out that night...tears would not help her to heal her pain but it was the only company she wanted that time. After so much of shedding tears when no tear was left to fall from her eyes then she decided to go to the girls' dorm...in a way something stopped her , she could hear someone talking to his own self , siyali didn't know why she was having the urge to make sure who that someone was? She slowly came near to the person till she could recognize the person and when she recognized that person was sid she quickly made herself hidden in dark shadows.
I can't, I just can't live with myself after what I did to you siyali , you mean a lot to me siyali. I wish you didn't tell me the truth mom about utkarsh being my brother...I am so sorry siyali, I had to break your heart along with mine because I had no other choice left, I hate myself and always will...god please just let me know why are you causing so much trouble for me? okay forget about me why you always make her miserable? Just a moment of happiness we got and you had to take that away too? If you are so much interested in taking things then why don't you take her pain? Siyali I love you with every breath I take..this is the only truth I know, I probably can't face you anymore because I won't be able to see the pain in your eyes caused by me, it will always remind me of how horrible person I was to you...main aur kya karta siyali? I already have taken so much from my brother , I could not do that again to him. I know right now you are hurt siyali but I also know that you are in safe hands and it's enough for me to live my rest life happily in solitude...sid fell on his knees, he burst into tears but suddenly he could hear someone clapping , sid immediately stood up and asked " Who's there? " he could sense someone coming to him , the invisible body slowly started to be visible when she came out of the darkness and that someone was siyali...sid was hell shocked to see her..she was still clapping her hands, sid was about to say something but he was stopped by her " Wow Siddharth Rajput you should have been given an Oscar, what a performance sid, I must say you truly convinced me that you didn't love me at all , thak nahin jate ho tum sid itni acting karte karte? Main toh khud thak jati hu tumhe itni acting karte dekh ke. " sid wasn't able to say anything to her, he was running out of words but then he started to say "siyali tu" but stopped by her again " No no , now don't tell me that who sab kutch ab bhi tumhe maine kehte huye suni who bhi ek jhut thi " siyali took one step closer to him, sid didn't have the courage to look into her eyes so he turned is back on her but siyali wasn't done with him so she turned him to face her " I am so sorry siyali, I never wanted to hurt you but I had to. " sid said
" What did you say? You didn't have any other choice? Well for your kind information yes you had other option too sid. You could have told me everything sid, we could find a solution together , did you even bother to ask what I wanted? Siyali asked him helplessly , she could not hold her tears anymore , she thought that she would never let sid to see her tears but there she was could not hold back her tears anymore...that guy made her to lose control over in everything, that guy made her to give love a chance , that guy made her to not to listen her precious friends. " Is this how much you love me sid? You didn't take a single moment to break my heart into a million pieces. You knew very well that I didn't believe in love but then you made me to fall for you and later what you did sid? You again set an example to me that love was delusional. Now I will ever in my life be able to believe in love again." Siyali said it,
She was sobbing hard , her words made sid to realize that what a blunder he did...sid could not see her like that so he attempted to wipe away her tears but siyali pushed him back " Don't you dare to touch me Siddharth Rajput. Kya samajh te ho tum apne apko? Pehle khud hi rolaoge aur badh mein khud hi annsu pochoge? I don't need your rumal to wipe away my tears and I don't need your shoulders to cry on..you hurt me badly sid, kya tumhare liye mujhe bhulana itna easy tha ? Ek bar bhi yeh nahin socha ke mujhe kitni taklif hogi? I love you sid with my everything if I didn't love you then a girl like me would not have kissed you. You broke my trust sid , I don't think that I will ever be able to trust you again, sayed tum mujhe utne intensity se pyaar nahin karte jitni maine ki hai tumhe, sayed ishi liye tumhare liye break up karna asan tha." Siylai told that.
Sid could not believe what she said, he was very hurt after listening her words " Tu pagal hai ? main tujhse pyaar nahin karta hun? Siyali you were, you are, you will always be my true love, do you have any idea how much it pained me to do this to you? I am broken siyali, you can't be mine but no one can love you more than me. Main aur kya karta siyali utkarsh mera bhai hai , I already have taken so much from him..how could I take you from him too, tell me? What do you think I am dancing in joy right now for breaking the heart of love of my life? Don't doubt my love siyali." Sid said it
Siyali could feel his pain..she could not see him crying like that, slowly she wiped away his tears and placed both her hands on his face, she joined her forehead with his one, they were like that for few seconds, neither o them spoke a word..after few seconds siyali broke the silence " what would you have done if you were in my place sid?"
Will be continued soon
Kumkum Bhagya
