Hi, Any married people out there? Need your advice on something. There’s this person I have met through a matrimonial site. We have met for 4-5 times but still i don’t feel any of slightest care or physical affection from his side. Not even when he is seeing me off, the max he does is a handshake. He has never offered me to sit in his car or drip me and when I questioned this he said the thought didn’t strike me. Though we are almost on the path of finalising things. But this aspect of his nature really bothers me. Rather i told him off once too but we decided to meet again because he is otherwise a nice guy. Checks all criterion like a good & safe family with cultured & understanding in laws, educated, well settled, talks well with my family and good with kids, listens to my concerns and tries to understand. But i don’t get any feeling with him. When i ask him about his family or work or his dreams he doesn’t say any good or bad things with passion. Just factual conversations like dad ki tabiyat kaisi hai, bhai ke bachon ka school tha which is fine but i want to see what is he passionate about. Our perspective about things also doesn’t match sometimes…. Like i am very outdoorsy and always excited to explore places irrespective of crowded hoga ya nahin, how is the weather etc etc whereas he is always like yr ye crowded hoga, aaj to bahut thand hai, ye safe nahin hai etc etc. He is still wearing a mask (even before the news of unexpected China surge) given there are max 50 cases in Delhi. I get a feeling he is too finicky and apprehensive of even small things. A very shielded personality. When i tell these things to my parents or even fam they don’t think it’s important and tell me that even in other guys there will be a 100 -ve things and no one is perfect.
I am just confused how much things like being impromptu , a little extra caring, chivalrous and little risky important in a relationship. I feel it’s v important. Because yes having kids is important and having your own family is important but what if you feel bored by the person in the start only?
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