Anupamaa still doesn't get it, does she?

usernameyrkkh thumbnail
Posted: 2 years ago

Such a slave mentality she has, despite becoming 'independent' now.


She didn't ask Baa to stop pestering Kinjal by nitpicking her efforts. That Kinjal will learn how to finetune her cooking when she has more time to invest towards it. It was left for Babuji to say.


She didn't ask Samar & Pakhi to at least assist Kinjal a bit more with the chores.


She doesn't want to get a fulltime maid, which is what Toshu wants. Apparently arguing & slaving everyday is easier than training a new maid.


Her first instinct was to scold Kinjal, the second to blame herself.


Her only solution to every problem is I will do it myself. It's my fault that I didn't work hard enough. Wtf? I hope this suicidal attitude is addressed soon.


PS. The BIGGEST problem that Anu doesn't understand is that she shouldn't have to ask all these people to do all these things. Kinjal understood her responsibilities for so long without anyone having to explain them to her. How TF does an oldie like Baa or a wholeass adult Samar doesn't?

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janecastle thumbnail
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Posted: 2 years ago

Anupama has a habit of not reacting when she should. She has all the time in the world to lecture Vanraj and Kavya but can't do the same with her useless children. The way she acts like a slave to Baa-Bapuji & her children is disgusting. She should have told some harsh truths to them a long time ago. Instead she is conveniently playing the role of a maid, without caring about her health or her self respect. And what's big deal with training a maid? Baa is sitting useless all day long. She can train one without any problem. But no, why bother when they have a free full-time maid at their beck and call. 🤪

Bapuji proved that he is Vanraj's father after all. He played so well to make sure their free maid won't leave. Otherwise they know that they would be in Kavya's mercy and it won't be long before they are packed off to some old age home. Anu's their maid cum lawyer cum bodyguard who fights all their battles and then serve them without any complaint.

sushups thumbnail
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Posted: 2 years ago

Can we have devika back in show...so that she can smack some sense into her head

usernameyrkkh thumbnail
Posted: 2 years ago

Originally posted by: janecastle

Anupama has a habit of not reacting when she should. ....Instead she is conveniently playing the role of a maid, without caring about her health or her self respect.


That came out pretty well when her instinct was to compare Baa to 'boss'. Even Kanha Ji taught that we should question elders when they are in the wrong. But Anu doesn't get that. She slave mentality is 46 years in the making.


Originally posted by: janecastle


And what's big deal with training a maid? Baa is sitting useless all day long.


Haha exactly. She has no problem forcing training on Kinjal, even though everyone knows that she doesn't have the time or mental space right now.


Originally posted by: janecastle


Bapuji proved that he is Vanraj's father after all. He played so well to make sure their free maid won't leave.

Bull's eye. Have never seen that man ask Anupamaa to rest before running to the kitchen after a long day at work. Never asks her if she's taking her meds on time. He happily drinks all the tea Anu has to serve, without ever offering her a glass of water. He is kind towards her many times, yes. But millions of parents-in-law are much more kinder towards their DILs without guilt-tripping them with the beti drama.

Dvanshi123 thumbnail
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Posted: 2 years ago

Originally posted by: usernameyrkkh

Such a slave mentality she has, despite becoming 'independent' now.


She didn't ask Baa to stop pestering Kinjal by nitpicking her efforts. That Kinjal will learn how to finetune her cooking when she has more time to invest towards it. It was left for Babuji to say.


She didn't ask Samar & Pakhi to at least assist Kinjal a bit more with the chores.


She doesn't want to get a fulltime maid, which is what Toshu wants. Apparently arguing & slaving everyday is easier than training a new maid.


Her first instinct was to scold Kinjal, the second to blame herself.


Her only solution to every problem is I will do it myself. It's my fault that I didn't work hard enough. Wtf? I hope this suicidal attitude is addressed soon.


PS. The BIGGEST problem that Anu doesn't understand is that she shouldn't have to ask all these people to do all these things. Kinjal understood her responsibilities for so long without anyone having to explain them to her. How TF does an oldie like Baa or a wholeass adult Samar doesn't?

So aptly put 

Ideal situation would be either hire a maid or allot duties to everyone. 

Slaving mentality I say 🧐

Ashirania thumbnail
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Posted: 2 years ago

i think it goes without saying that the male characters in this show (aside from babuji from time to time) have nothing but cow fodder in their heads.


now that that's said, you're right. anupama is so indoctrinated, that she just cannot get out of that mentality of a woman being the worker of the house. in her mind the premise is 'ALL household chores are ALWAYS a woman's job' she's trying hard to not indoctrinate her kids, which is probably why paakhi does nothing, and shes trying hard to pretend she doesnt want kinjal to do the same, which is why she isnt actively 'asking' kinjal to do things, but is not actively trying to make life easier for her either (by asking her bum sons to pick up the slack) 


and the shah family itself - they dont want to change, they want all the roles to be as they always have. the point of this show was never to show us that roles can be reversed or altered, or that families can help to re-structure themselves to make it so everyone can achieve their hopes and dreams. it was just to show that a woman can be mahan if she decides to do everything for everyone all the time, and if she doesnt, shes a garbage woman who deserves no respect from the family. 


all that talk baa did about not forcing kinjal, or not making her work 'too' hard, or that 'everyone was pitching in'. not once, NOT ONCE did she talk about how the other WORKING family members were contributing too, i.e toshu and vanraj. in fact, it seemed like those two were given a pass BECAUSE they were working, unlike kinjal, and obviously anupama. because how dare anyone even think that kinjal and anupama are the SAME as vanraj and toshu - all are working, all are tired and all need rest.


kinjal will always be my favourite character, even if the writers decide to butcher her character. she's the face of the 'new age' of women, and she's being torn down because the orthodox, disgusting MCPs in the writing room dont know how to manage the idea of a woman *shock-horror* actually managing her work and family.

Innocentlove96 thumbnail
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Posted: 2 years ago

Originally posted by: janecastle

Anupama has a habit of not reacting when she should. She has all the time in the world to lecture Vanraj and Kavya but can't do the same with her useless children. The way she acts like a slave to Baa-Bapuji & her children is disgusting. She should have told some harsh truths to them a long time ago. Instead she is conveniently playing the role of a maid, without caring about her health or her self respect. And what's big deal with training a maid? Baa is sitting useless all day long. She can train one without any problem. But no, why bother when they have a free full-time maid at their beck and call. 🤪

Bapuji proved that he is Vanraj's father after all. He played so well to make sure their free maid won't leave. Otherwise they know that they would be in Kavya's mercy and it won't be long before they are packed off to some old age home. Anu's their maid cum lawyer cum bodyguard who fights all their battles and then serve them without any complaint.

Can't agree more. To some extent understood the reason of her staying back and living in same house. It's about one's rights. But why the responsibilities...... Kavya is there daughter in law not Anupama that she should shoulder all responsibilities of that house and members.

Innocentlove96 thumbnail
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Posted: 2 years ago

Originally posted by: usernameyrkkh

That came out pretty well when her instinct was to compare Baa to 'boss'. Even Kanha Ji taught that we should question elders when they are in the wrong. But Anu doesn't get that. She slave mentality is 46 years in the making.



Haha exactly. She has no problem forcing training on Kinjal, even though everyone knows that she doesn't have the time or mental space right now.


Bull's eye. Have never seen that man ask Anupamaa to rest before running to the kitchen after a long day at work. Never asks her if she's taking her meds on time. He happily drinks all the tea Anu has to serve, without ever offering her a glass of water. He is kind towards her many times, yes. But millions of parents-in-law are much more kinder towards their DILs without guilt-tripping them with the beti drama.

Bingo!!

Vanraj used his anger to control Anupama earlier......but now his father is using the trump card, emotional card to control Anupama. That every she tries to break free he guilt trip her by playing the beti card. But never saw him treating her like beti.

Paytonlee101 thumbnail
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Posted: 2 years ago

Anupama wants everyone to be self sacrificing like her. She is a maid who is bought not by money but by emotional blackmail. She is not a good mother nor a good mother in law bcoz she puts those roles second to being the perfect daughter in law. Vanraj is a lucky man. Living with his mistress and have his ex wife to take care of his parents and he can also keep his new wife under his thumb by comparing her against anupama when he feels like it 

Lets see how much vanraj’s parents support anupama if she find another partner and want to live her life.


Edited by Paytonlee101 - 2 years ago
sweet_tania thumbnail
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Posted: 2 years ago

"Apparently arguing & slaving everyday is easier than training a new maid."

I am totally agree with this line. This was my first thought when she was explaining about how hard it is to train new maid. Training new maid is more easier than slaving everyday and putting alarm of 4 AM since nobody in your house is interest in standing in the kitchen and you yourself has willingly taken 100% responsibility of "pure cooking" (no side kitchen activities).

"Her only solution to every problem is I will do it myself. It's my fault that I didn't work hard enough. Wtf? I hope this suicidal attitude is addressed soon"

She was looking utter mental when she was taking whole blame on herself about baa-kinjal fight. Fight was because of baa's comparison and non compromising attitude but anupama diverted the whole matter and made it like she is responsible for fight because she had to visit her ill mother. Matter was never related to anupama. When kinjal said mummy subah subah chali jati and fass jati hu mai was also because of baa's expectations on kinjal's working methods.

Her suicidal attitude needs to be addressed soon.

Definitely anupama still doesn't get it.

Edited by sweet_tania - 2 years ago