Anupamaa the character

Aside from the fact that Anupama is the protagonist who perhaps half the viewers dislike and another half sympathize with, examining her character without bias is pretty intriguing. 

Here is this woman who is married off young, falls in love with her conceited and abusive husband, knows no better than to obey her in laws and treat them with reverence regardless of how she is treated stemming from the fact she is completely dependent emotionally and financially on that brute of a husband, saddled with three children and thus getting further embroiled with this family that she cannot fight against or leave until the husband she reveres is found to be a cheater, shattered she tries to move on but stumbles into another equally stifling relationship, never financially independent, always the victim of misfortune even during the so called happy times, adopts a child to create a new family, has said devoted husband leave her for months with not a word while he cohabits with the mother of the adopted child, husband returns only to perform wedding rites with so called fake companion, loses her son who dies for her husband, accused of playing favorites amongst her kids she leaves everyone behind in a fit of despair, comes to America with a dream but only to again fail, fall prey again to the quagmire of relationships that she thinks she has left behind, never winning, always falling short, but falsely convincing herself that she will rise again like a phoenix with that indomitable human spirit of hope. 

Anupama saddens me, irks me, makes me want to shake some sense into her, she disappoints, she repulses yet also leaves me with a reluctant sense of pride in that fellow feeling of a woman that is desperately trying to make the best of situations that always somehow turn against her. 

It is a serial and the plot has to have these unbelievable twists and turns, the show is named after her, is about her life, she is the constant, other characters may come and go, ulitmately it is her story that is being told.

There are plenty of real people who are stuck in vicious loops of personal inadequacies and external toxic circumstances that do not let them move out.

But this is not some random vlog into an everyday life where people rinse and repeat everyday activities and cater to voyeuristic fantasies.

This is a show which needs to move in a particular direction. We have some expectations in terms of characters and them having consequences. Real life may not give you closure but a show should.

I fail to understand how she "stumbled into another stifling relationship" after divorce. 

I also fail to understand how she is tying to make best of situations. 

I would not be proud of anyone like her, this show & the chars are all great lessons of what not to be!

I completely agree with Niharika's post above, with Anupama, the show makers lost a chance to path breaking ITV style of story telling. What could have been an inspiring story for millions, a phoenix journey of an oppressed illiterate woman in her 40's has turned into a crap.  

She had a loving new relationship with a new daughter. There was nothing STIFLING about it. She just wanted to act like a woman child who doesn't want responsibilities and wanted to be spend time with her ex and his family and ignore current one

No relationship survives like that. She has run away from every responsibility she had, multiple dance schools, YouTube, kapadia company, restaurants, she just keeps abandoning and running away from responsibility.

And what is the end result? She keeps becoming victim again and again she keeps crying and being miserable and depressed.

She is a lesson to all women on what not to do

Originally posted by: SmithaRam

I fail to understand how she "stumbled into another stifling relationship" after divorce. 

I also fail to understand how she is tying to make best of situations. 

I would not be proud of anyone like her, this show & the chars are all great lessons of what not to be!

I completely agree with Niharika's post above, with Anupama, the show makers lost a chance to path breaking ITV style of story telling. What could have been an inspiring story for millions, a phoenix journey of an oppressed illiterate woman in her 40's has turned into a crap.  

No one will have any sympathy for anyone who wants to be a lifelong victim.

Life gave her great second and third chances, loving husband and daughter, all the money and power in the world to enable herself. 

But she ran away and now is a crying depressed victim again. 

There are millions of people waiting for even second chance to live independently and this selfish women threw away a loving family, money and power to end up on the road again.

Who will have sympathy for such a creature? 

Originally posted by: NiharikaMishra

There are plenty of real people who are stuck in vicious loops of personal inadequacies and external toxic circumstances that do not let them move out.

But this is not some random vlog into an everyday life where people rinse and repeat everyday activities and cater to voyeuristic fantasies.

This is a show which needs to move in a particular direction. We have some expectations in terms of characters and them having consequences. Real life may not give you closure but a show should.

Very few victims go back AFTER being empowered and free. Anupama had multiple million kapadia Empire to herself. She was one of the most powerful woman in the world. She left that to be a bechari victim again.

Who will have any sympathy for such a character.

Originally posted by: NiharikaMishra

There are plenty of real people who are stuck in vicious loops of personal inadequacies and external toxic circumstances that do not let them move out.

But this is not some random vlog into an everyday life where people rinse and repeat everyday activities and cater to voyeuristic fantasies.

This is a show which needs to move in a particular direction. We have some expectations in terms of characters and them having consequences. Real life may not give you closure but a show should.

Art mirrors life. Yes. Some people get stuck in a rut and are unable to move on. This is a long playing serial and will end with closure. The protagonist is making efforts and that in itself is a lesson to keep trying - failures are stepping stones to success. Not everyone can become successful or happy just because they try to get out of the rut they are in. As you rightly said, some can never move on or out and maybe such is the story of this protagonist. 

Originally posted by: SmithaRam

I fail to understand how she "stumbled into another stifling relationship" after divorce. 

I also fail to understand how she is tying to make best of situations. 

I would not be proud of anyone like her, this show & the chars are all great lessons of what not to be!

I completely agree with Niharika's post above, with Anupama, the show makers lost a chance to path breaking ITV style of story telling. What could have been an inspiring story for millions, a phoenix journey of an oppressed illiterate woman in her 40's has turned into a crap.  

It began with roses the second relationship but it was stifling in my opinion. Anuj leaving her and running after Maya, living with Maya with not a word to Anupama (when Anupama left him later after being questioned about her loyalty and love, viewers were up in arms about her vileness), coming back with Maya and sitting as a couple with Maya for Dimpy’s kanyadhan, is that not depravingly stifling to a wife?

Originally posted by: Harish111

She had a loving new relationship with a new daughter. There was nothing STIFLING about it. She just wanted to act like a woman child who doesn't want responsibilities and wanted to be spend time with her ex and his family and ignore current one

No relationship survives like that. She has run away from every responsibility she had, multiple dance schools, YouTube, kapadia company, restaurants, she just keeps abandoning and running away from responsibility.

And what is the end result? She keeps becoming victim again and again she keeps crying and being miserable and depressed.

She is a lesson to all women on what not to do

Anupama can act Mahaan, can act foolishly grandiose but a woman child, I don’t think so. She was a 40 year old woman who had a grandchild already, yet for the sake of her husband who wanted to re-create his youthful college love, she lovingly becomes a mother to a little girl. The little girl’s birth mother shows up and crushes on the second husband. What does the husband do? He runs after this woman with not a thought spared for his wife whom he professes to love above all else. He disappears for months, his wife’s living is made desperate by Barkha and lot, wife moves back home to her mother’s, is in depression and the husband returns with birth mother in tow. To add insult to injury, not yet divorced from the so called love of his life, he dares to do kanyadhan with Maya. If this is not an oppressive relationship, I wonder what is. 

Originally posted by: Harish111

No one will have any sympathy for anyone who wants to be a lifelong victim.

Life gave her great second and third chances, loving husband and daughter, all the money and power in the world to enable herself. 

But she ran away and now is a crying depressed victim again. 

There are millions of people waiting for even second chance to live independently and this selfish women threw away a loving family, money and power to end up on the road again.

Who will have sympathy for such a creature? 

She did not run away on purpose. Good for her that she left, she is to be applauded that she left. A man who can run off with another woman and cohabit with another for months and then has the audacity to question his wife’s allegiance and commitment, needs to be left. All the money and power in the world cannot bring happiness if there is no trust.