Originally posted by: BB_CallmeC
Chapter 9: You are a Miracle!
“Isn’t it too late Shekhar?” Karishma asked as Shekhar was about to leave the living room. Shekhar stopped and turned around.
“Maybe it is Karishma. We probably are very late. But it's never late to tell a child that they are loved. Yah!!! We would have to be open to the fact that she might never accept us. She might hate us. And we will have to accept anything that she throws at us. Anger! Hate!” Shekhar tried to make his stance very clear.
“Us?” Karishma questioned Shekhar. She was unsure of why Shekhar had associated himself with the situation. She knew he wasn't the one to be blamed. It was her decision and she also knew the fact that if she had brought Mishti along with her, he would have accepted her wholeheartedly.
“Yes! Us! Us Karishma! Mishri said something to me today and I was…" he paused "Well, she is right… I didn't try hard enough.. I saw you drive her away from yourself. I knew what you were trying to do with her. Yet I did nothing. I thought I should be supportive. I thought I was young and didn't understand anything. But I did. And now I wish.. I wish that I did. I wish that I had stopped” Shekhar was ready to take equal blame on himself. He accepted that he almost had an equal role to play. If he knew, he would have accepted Mishti as his own, all he had to do was be persistent about it. And he couldn't.
“Stop me? Shekhar I thought you said you understood my reasons. Now they are suddenly wrong for you?” Karishma recalled all the times Shekhar never forced her to talk about Mishti. She recalled how he had been supportive all the while regarding her past and her own decisions.
“I understood it that day and I still understand right now. But you have to understand that not every decision which is right for you is right for others. And in situations like these, it doesn't matter whose was right and who was wrong. And Karishma, whatever it is, we are partners at the end of the day. For better or for worse, we are in this together. And Karishma! If not for us, if not for Mishti, we should do this for Mishri”. Shekhar made his stand clear. Somewhere he knew he was being selfish. He knew what he was doing partly would have been for Mishri as for she deserved to have a sibling and an elder sister. But he knew that it was also for Mishti. And now he wasn't looking to give up for both the girls. He wasn't going to hide behind his responsibility towards Karishma.
“No dad! You shouldn't do this for me.” Karishma and Shekhar both turned and looked towards Mishri. She walked towards them and sat down on the armrest of the sofa. She joined her hands and looked down for sometime. Shekhar was far more surprised than Karishma towards her statement. It was just a while ago that she left home without informing them just to meet Mishti, just to get to know her. And now she was herself denying them to do anything in that direction. Shekhar asked for the reason.
“Dad! When I met her today, I was very angry at both of you. Especially mom. And she told me that I shouldn't make this about myself. That it was between mom and her and I shouldn't be poking my nose unnecessarily or judging anyone. While I was still not able to leave my judgments aside, I was able to let go of my anger. Because she made me realize by doing that and interfering I was just making matters worse.” Mishri took a pause. She stood up and walked towards Shekhar. “Dad, I know you told me that I should give mom some benefit of doubt and I am. But still I am not able to understand what is right and what is not. Maybe you do. Maybe you want to right the right and right the wrong. I don't even know if I am making sense. Hell I feel like a confused fool right now. But I know one thing dad. If you use me as reason or bait to that wrong right, you will make it worse. And even if I have that 0.1% chance of having her as a part of my life, I won't have that. And you guys don't have to worry about me. I will figure out a way myself. And I promise I won't keep any secrets from you two. But please don't use me as an excuse..” Mishri begged while folding her hands. Karishma looked down with guilt while Shekhar kept looking towards Mishri. He was proud of his little girl. She could be a pampered little brat of the family but she was also one of the most understanding child for children her age.
“Mom! I am sorry for yesterday and today. I am ashamed. I still don't know where I stand in this whole scenario but I do understand that I was reckless. And seriously! If you don't want to talk to her, you don't have to. She clearly told me she wasn't looking for any answers. Especially not from you.. She doesn't expect anything from you….After you..ummm..walked away from her... So… I guess don't try to make it worse by using me. I will find my way. That's how you and dad have brought me up. Talk to her only if you want to. For yourself. For her! Not for anyone. Definitely for me. And definitely not for this family.” Karishma had tears in her eyes while Mishri continued to explain her side. She was about to cup her face but Mishri walked away. “Sorry mom! I am not able to get certain things out of my head right now. Sorry”. Karishma just closed her eyes and clasped her raised hand tightly. Mishri locked herself in her room again. She took her phone and started texting again.
Shekhar and Karishma headed to their room without saying anything. They decided to retire for the night and not stretch the conversation any further.
Next morning in Rajvansh House
Sunrays entered MishBir’s room. Abir was wide awake already and rested his chin on his arm. He was lovingly adoring Mishti who was still sleeping. She scrunched her nose and rubbed her eyes lazily. She stretched her arms and opened her eyes slowly. As the image of the room slowly became clear to her eyes, she was dumbstruck. It was filled with heart shaped balloons. She looked everywhere. They were on the wall, on the floor. She looked towards Abir who was still adoring her with a smile on his face. He caressed her cheek with his thumb and wished her good morning. He moved closed to her and kissed her forehead. She sat comfortably on the bed, followed by him and he wrapped his hand around her shoulder. Mishti again looked around the room and asked him about the surprise.
“Last couple of days have been pretty emotionally demanding.” Mishti smiled nervously. She tried to look away but Abir held her hands. Mishti looked towards him again and smiled. She was trying her level best to forget about things that didn't matter. Abir understood her struggle and decided to help her. “So for a change and as your doctor-doctor, I have some prescriptions for you! Prescription #1 A smile a day keeps the tears away.” Abir tightened his hold on her and Mishti smiled while nodding her head. “So this was one of my prescriptions for the day.” Abir continued and Mishti looked towards Abir with confusion. “One of the prescriptions?” Mishti asked.
“Time for prescription #2.” Abir leaned forward and started kissing her cheeks. He slowly moved to kiss her eyes. Mishti clasped her hand on the bed as she loved the attention Abir was showering on her. Abir then kissed her forehead, her nose and finally kissed her lips. It wasn't lust. It wasn't pleasure. The kiss left her with the sense of belonging. He broke the kiss and said “A kiss a day paves a way to the beginning of a cheerful day”.
“Was this kiss or kisses?” Mishti asked with a grin on her face.
“I was just adding more flavor to the level of cheerfulness. But wifey! You just gave me another idea” Abir leaned forward and whispered in her ears with his husky voice. Mishti closed her eyes. His husky voice was making her lose her senses. He was purposely breathing close to her neck so that she would just be lost in their magical world. Mishti struggled but finally managed to ask Abir “What idea?”
“We should just do it. A perfect morning workout and a mood booster.” Mishti was first surprised and later aghast at his suggestion. Abir slowly started to caress Mishti’s waist and touched his forehead with hers. Mishti tried her level best to escape his trap but Abir’s hold was quite tight. Plus the proximity wasn't making things any more easier for her. She was loving it. But she also recalled that she had a long day dealing with NGO paperwork and she couldn't be late. She managed to tickle Abir and tried to escape from his hold. She managed to get off the bed as Abir was too late to catch her.
“I don't know about you but I have a long day.” Mishti opened the door to their bathroom and saw more balloons on the floor. “Even in the bathroom?” Abir nodded with a straight face as Mishti questioned him. “Don't tell me there are more balloons in the house?” Abir shook his head and got off the bed. Mishti closed her eyes with relief. She noticed him walking towards her with a grin on his face. “Abir! Are you planning on doing this everyday?” Abir nodded and finally held Mishti by her waist. Mishti kept her hands on his chest and just smiled at the straight baby face Abir was making. “Abir! If you continue to do this every day, there will be an astonishing breaking news one day”
“What?” Abir asked Mishti.
“B-B-B-B!” Abir looked towards Mishti with curiosity. “#Bae goes #bankrupt for buying #balloons for his #Bae! And there will be new prescriptions in town: A balloon a day will bring the possibility of bankruptcy closer every day.” Abir just laughed at Mishti’s level of sense of humor. He told her that she really still needed to work on her skills. Mishti just rolled her eyes at his suggestion.
“So what if I go bankrupt? We will live in a tent. And I will go work… No No No! You always like to do things differently. So you will go work and earn money for our living. And like a loving husband, I will take care of our home, make food for you and feed you. Right?” Mishti and Abir both just shared a laugh. Abir recalled Mishti’s words from her diary and felt sad. He was at least relieved with the fact that his Mishti was smiling. He knew the damage was too much and it wasn't going to be a one day job. He also knew he currently had no solution for the problem. But until he could find a solution, he decided to make all his efforts towards making her each and every second of her special and memorable.
Mishti excused herself to get ready while Abir got busy in making other arrangements. As soon as she got ready and came out of the bathroom, she found a note on her dressing table.
‘Prescription #3:
Follow the light towards the loft,
To make new memories and spare no cost!’
Mishti smiled and left the note on the table. She climbed the stairs in their room and headed towards the loft. She was surprised as she noticed the changes in the loft. Abir had removed all his pictures from the wall. He built a nice seating area with a small mattress and arranged pillows to sit comfortably with the back support on the mattress. He attached light curtains from the top and extended it to both sides of the mattress, almost giving a feel of a half sized tent. He had a small table set in the front with their gujarati breakfast. Breakfast had their ginger tea, Khaman and daal fritters. All of their common favorite items. Abir came from the back and extended his arm towards Mishti! “Let’s have our breakfast date!” Mishti nodded and held his hand. They both comfortably sat down on the mattress. Abir took a piece of Khaman and fed Mishti first. And Mishti did the same in return. They spent some quality time feeding each other and having their breakfast. After finishing their breakfast, Mishti Abir rested their backs on the pillow and sat comfortably to relax.
“Did you like the food?” Mishti nodded as Abir asked. “And the set up?” Mishti looked around the empty walls and was about to ask Abir regarding the same but was interrupted by him.
Abir held her arm and interlocked his fingers with hers. “You are a miracle you know!” Abir said while just adoring a confused Mishti. “After whatever happened with you, you are still here! Being strong or trying to be.” Mishti smiled nervously. “You know Mishti, it is actually very easy to take someone’s constant behavior for granted. Like for example Nanko! He knew I would always pick him. But he also expected me to pick him after all the wrong doings. He also expected me to leave you and pick him. He did take my love granted for him then. When Nanko or Kuhu did some stupidity, oftentimes we have just let things go thinking of that as their another immature step. And they make it their habit and so do we. And again things get taken for granted. And we forget then that there will always be a limit.” Mishti kept looking towards Abir with confusion. She wasn't sure what point Abir was trying to make. But she still decided to hear him patiently. “Similarly and unknowingly, we took your strength and maturity for granted. You know how much I always admire your strength and your individuality. It actually encourages me to always do better. And sometimes the brain fails to remember that there is only a certain point can you be strong or draw your strength out of someone. That you will feel tired for yourself. That you will feel tired of being strong always. That you will feel tired of constantly trying to manage that expectation for others. We forget that you just don't need everyone but just one person to understand that. And I realize I failed to be that person for you.”
Mishti got shocked at Abir’s statement and straightened her back. She tried to say something but Abir kept his hand on her lips and requested him to let him speak. “Just sit and relax and hear me out ok!! You know when the brain is trying to process so much information, it very easily lets go of things you expected will react a certain way. Not trying to make an excuse or find out a way for myself. And I know it still doesn't make it any less wrong. But I do know it happened that way and unfortunately I ended up causing you the same pain that you have been fighting and I am sorry. I am extremely sorry.” Abir had tears in his eyes as he was trying to apologize. “Mishti! I am not perfect. I am really not and a little less understanding than you probably are. But you still love me as if I am perfect. And all you expect back from me is love. All you expect is that I don't leave you. Whether or not I fight along with you, you just expect me to not leave you alone. And I am not going to. You are very precious to me. I promise you I am not going anywhere. I just can't find my path if I don't have you holding my hand. I just can't. So please don't think that I am going to leave you.” Mishti had tears in her eyes and just hid her face on his chest. Abir kissed her head. “Mishti I know a lot of things are unsaid but have to be understood. But sometimes you know it's better to just say it. Tell me when I am hurting you. But don't keep me out of your miseries. It is ok for you to feel not ok. It is ok if you feel tired. It is ok if for once you don't want to be the strong and mature one. It’s ok if you don't want to fight at that moment and just let it be. But just tell me. Let me help you. I love you and I want to be with you in your every fight, every step of the way.” Mishti cried listening to his words and hugged him tightly. Abir hugged her back just let her have her moment. She was holding on to a lot of things and it was better if she would at least cry for some of it. He waited for her to calm down. Mishti was slowly calming down. She let out a few stutter breaths. Abir caressed her hands.
He pointed towards the empty and Mishti looked in that direction. “You know why these walls are empty?” Mishti shook her head. “They are empty for you. You told me right that whenever any of this situation arises, you use your old good memories to put yourself back together by reminding yourself of the things you had. The word you used was glue!! Right? Mishti!! There is only until a certain point can you use your old glue. It dries up and doesn't do a good job in sticking things back together. Similarly, old memories fade out! So you will need new memories always! You will need new glue always. First and foremost our attempt will always be for that situation to never arise but if you need this will be your corner! Your spot! Where you will stick your memories and your treasures. And whenever you feel the need to remind yourself, you can just come here. And everyday from today our aim will be to fill these walls with as many good memories as possible. Our aim will be to not even let the shadows of your past haunt you in any way.” Mishti just smiled with tears in her eyes and looked towards Abir with respect and adoration. “Let’s take a picture” Abir took his polaroid and took a selfie with them. “And this will be the first picture that you will stick on your wall”. She just kissed him hard on his cheek and touched her forehead with his. She was able to love Abir a certain way because Abir loved her the same in return. It was always a two way street for them for everything. She wasn't able to figure out how she got so lucky to have him as her life partner. She was her partner in the true sense.
“I am sorry Abir”. Mishti tried to apologize.
“Hey! Listen! You have nothing to be sorry for. Even if it was accidental, it was the right thing. I had to know and I have to know when I goof up. And Mish, I am telling you that I will need you by my side every time. So even if you feel like going away, I am not going to let you and I won't either. I can't live without you. I know by just saying it your fear isn't going to go away. And I promise, I will say this everyday and every time until you want to hear it. Until you have to hear it. Even if I am the last person standing by your side, I will be still with you. I won't leave you. I promise. I won't leave you”
“Me neither.” They hugged each other again for sometime. They snuggled and kissed each other wherever they could. They were just not ready to let go off each other yet. Abir’s attention fell on the wall clock and he realized they were late.
“Mish! Mishti!! Lets go!! I have this whole day planned for us. We have places to go and people to meet.” Abir hurried down the stairs as he continued to talk. Mishti stopped for a second as she got nervous hearing his statement. “Abir! I hope we aren't meeting Kapoors today. I mean I just.. Dont..” Abir stopped her again and requested her to not worry about it. He reaffirmed with her that he had no such things planned as he knew she wasn't looking for anything from them.
Meanwhile in Kapoor Mansion
Karishma nervously approached Shekhar and said “Shekhar!! Let’s go meet Mishti!”
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