why can't Men do Household Chores like Us??: Vidya Balan

Fluffyalexis thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#1
In an interview with a leading daily, the actor talks about her idea of a successful marriage and equality in the relationship.
 
Vidya said, "At the end of the day, a marriage of any relationship is a partnership, so there has to be equality. Men aren't accustomed to this idea, which is why women have to lure them into doing at least some of the work before expecting them to do 5 percent. See, both partners step out of the house to earn their livelihood but it's highly unfair that after a long, hard day, the woman has to come back and do household chores. Even if she has help at home, she still has to monitor, supervise and keep a check on everything. So, men should contribute equally."
 
She was asked that the stereotype that a man has to work outside and woman has to take care of kids at home still persists and she answered. "Yes, that's because of the deep conditioning that the mother is more crucial to a child's upbringing than a father. But that's not true. I'm not a psychologist, this is just my opinion. As the mother has borne the baby, she instinctively doing that much more. Even if she has had a smooth pregnancy, once she delivers the baby, she wants to spend time with the little one. However, she also needs to get her energy back. No one ever talks about that. We forget that the woman too needs a lot of care."

Edited by desiking3 - 6 years ago

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angelpureness thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#2
There is a difference between can't and don't... a small responsibility lies in culture/ society... while majority of the responsibility lies with the mother/ upbringing.

I know of mum's who train their kids from young age and gives them pep talks on equality and shared responsibilities because they do not want their daughter inlaws to endure what they have.
anjaanichudi thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#3
Agree with her. ...changes will take time,  but hopefully soon. 
JustMySelf thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#4
who says so?
my dad grew up in hostel n he can do everything that my
mom does even better than her..
same with my bro..
he n my bhabi both works bt he does the laundry to help her..
it is not the ability that men lacks..
rather it is the mentality that few men does lack..
else remember the greatest chefs in this world are men..
not really women ๐Ÿ˜†
Edited by JustMySelf - 6 years ago
meandwho thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#5
Thats is what we were taught in Indian social structure, with the era where more and more women are going into the labor force, we see them taking on more work(office/home). While a man can single minded work on his project. He isn't expected to work.
These advertisements are good at showcaasing this:

1) Notice the space women occupied vs men
[YOUTUBE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9BlI9nhqTE[/YOUTUBE]


2) Hope more women realizes this
[YOUTUBE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJukf4ifuKs[/YOUTUBE]
bips thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#6

Originally posted by: Parvati..

What are you keeping kambali bais for then idiot?



Pls ask your mom if having a bai somehow means that she doesn't need to do household work... Bai does a fraction of work and require constant supervision... 


I know alot of ppl who say that housewife doesn't do anything, sab kuch toh bai kar deti hai... But they don't realize that housewife is literally working morning to night on a zillion things that makes the rest of the family life easy
angrybread thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#7
I think things are changing now at-least in educated section and cities. There is no way i would have survived with my kids and household chores without major help from my husband. He has literally done everything right from cooking , cleaning, washing, ironing, looking after kids, nappy changing etc etc. 
I think the notion that only women do household chores was in old times when duties were divided with women at home being housewives only and men going out to earn but now with more women also working things are changing .
2RsFan thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#8
Cos the society is patriarchal 
bips thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#9

Originally posted by: JustMySelf

who says so?
my dad grew up in hostel n he can do everything that my
mom does even better than her..
same with my bro..
he n my bhabi both works bt he does the laundry to help her..
it is not the ability that men lacks..
rather it is the mentality that few men does lack..
else remember the greatest chefs in this world are men..
not really women ๐Ÿ˜†



That's amazing that in your family it works this way
.. But it is assuredly not a norm in a majority of households


Btw, chef is a job... A paying profession... And doing housework is completely different... 


Also notice how you say that your brother "helps" your bhabhi... Implying its her duty to do housework whereas he lends her a helping hand... I help my friend do her homework but essentially it's her responsibility...


Ps:  May be you didn't mean it that way but thats the general attitude I'm talking about - that men 'help'.. Its not really their job 
pink_kitten thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#10
Men who are confident in their masculinity are able to do household works. The men in my life have cooked for me, and I've cooked for them, they have washed utensils and clothes etc... But yeah, it's not the norm. People expect women to do cooking and men to do things that require 'strength' like picking up heavy things..I used to feel bad when in school boys were asked to pick up benches cos guys are supposed to be strong and do that labour. ๐Ÿค” Gender roles are stupid af. Edited by MrBiebersWifey. - 6 years ago