Love & Punishment
It hurt her beyond belief that he would be equally honest, but his honesty involved hate.
A wave of compassion for her father caused tears to flow freely.
"I am so sorry Trisha" he said emotionally
"it does not matter now" she said sniffling
"I dont know what I was thinking... I didnt know if I was even thinking"
"You were thinking. You planned this." she said clearly looking at him with stormy eyes
He nodded sadly
"I assumed you married me to get some property or something" she said naively "I thought I was just some random person"
"You were not" he said barely inaudibly unable to confess that
"I know that... now" she said sadly
Because he made her feel special for two months had caused her to assume she was no longer random
The fact that she wasnt a random pick hurt her tremendously.
"You have to forgive me" he begged
"We are strangers now, my forgiving you shouldnt be so important" she said gruffly trying her best to hold back tears
"thats not true... DONT say that" he warned
"I will... I will... I will say what I want" she shrieked
"Trish" he reached out
She stepped back hitting her chest of drawers.
"I am going to try... I dont even know how to try... I am going to try to" she shuddered
"I dont even know how I let this all happen. I dont know how to get out of love. (his eyes sparkled like shimmering
diamonds his breath catching in his throat in a gasp)
I tell myself I allowed it only because Jayadev hurt me. I hurt him so so badly. I never thought about him for one second even. I loved HIM I thought.
How could I feel something so roaring... means... " she sobbed uncontrollably lost for vocab
He hated hearing he was not even her consolation prize.
"He never did or said anything bad to me you know" waves of grief swept over her
"I am not your punishment..." he was furious
"You were" she said inaudibly, reinforcing her vow that it was over and he was her penance
Her father who had been taking a bath, came back into the central hall she could hear his chant
She picked up her laptop and walked out quietly