Fiction-A Love So Beautiful! (Chapter-46) Updated-Pg.8-cont.

                 Yavuz came to her house this time  and told her some facts about Ece and her tattoo , the reason why she didn't remove that tattoo.  Feriha told him that she trusted Emir then Yavuz told her that he hope her husband deserve this trust forever. This was good for both of them and for him too.  As yavuz was leaving the house,  same moment Emir entered the apartment, found Yavuz standing there . He lost his cool,  asked him to get out from his home.  Yavuz left looking at him sarcastically with a smirk . 

                Emir took Feriha in his arms but Feriha was restless after what Yavuz told her about Ece. She was worried about Emir's life which he had put at stake. He was was being stubborn.  He was shot once and could be in danger again . How could she be at peace when Emir was playing with fire. All voices of Aysun, Yavuz were echoing in her head . When Emir was shot that time Ece had told Emir that she will leave the job but Emir didn't agree .He was being stubborn. Now it had become kind of ego issue with him. Feriha was serious this time , she couldn't live with constant fear if Emir was safe .

 While writing about the scene where Feriha asks him to choose between her and his work then Lara Fabian's number came to my mind Broken Vow

 https://vimeo.com/180567828

She did not know what to do ? Her steps took her to park . She felt as if earth had moved under her feet. She had nobody she could talk with. Now she missed her mother Zehra who had stood always behind her like a pillar,  she needed her most now. She did not want to talk to Levant.   This time she had to take decision herself . She wanted to run away far far away where she could disappear in oblivion.  All was looking hazy before her,  she could not see clearly.  All of a sudden she remembered the old couple in the mountains who had asked them to visit them again and told Feriha that she was like a daughter to them.  

 She got up as if someone has sucked life from her. She went to her parents house but then stopped herself from knocking,   she knew what the reaction would be.  She just touched the door as if wanted to feel her family. Slowly she climbed the stairs to her apartment. She put her clothes in a bag whatever she found and while going out she picked up the picture from the drawer. She left the house, wishing  Emir to be happy with what,  he wanted in his life. She did not want to put him in odd situation. She closed the door for the last time with teary eyes.  With only a single bag and with some money, left the building. Levant was in the adjacent house of his , he heard some noise but then went to sleep .

                             Feriha reached bus stand and took the bus for village in mountains. Feriha never for a moment doubted Emir's love for her,  knew in her heart that Emir only loved her and she would  always be  in his heart. But last few days were suffocating her and Emir was also trying his best to make her happy,  putting efforts to make Night successful. He wanted to prove his father wrong but forgetting in all this that his life was at stake, distancing himself. She could not live in constant fear what could happen to him.

Emir left the Night in the early hours and was happy with his decision. Ece had resigned from the job wishing Emir happiness . She never wanted to create problem in Emir's life. She knew Feriha was the reason for his existence. Her tattoo had created the problem and she thought its high time she should do away with it. She was already thinking about leaving the job, had decided to go to US where she would get back her old job then something else came to her mind. 

                  Emir had known all the time Feriha's fear about his life . He was not mafia and why did he make it ego issue for Ece . How could he be happy if Feriha was not with him, Emir while driving to house ,all thoughts were crowding his mind . If anything would have happened to Feriha when Yavuz came to his house or his visit in park .How could he be so reckless about Feriha , running in the race to prove to his father ? 

           How could he put Feriha's life in danger too. He smiled thinking about Feriha's reaction , knew in his heart , Feriha would be be happy. His father had asked him to take control of the Hills. It was all his now .He kept on thinking his life with Feriha where something or the other,  kept on widening the rift between the two . He couldn't imagine his life without her.

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             Emir parked his car and with long steps reached the lift, He could not control his excitement to see the expressions on Feriha's face when he would tell her his decision. He was scared at the thought of her leaving him. He opened the door quietly with his key and after removing his coat and shoes in the closet, softly reached his bedroom. He didn't want to wake her up. He looked at the bed but Feriha was not there then he looked in the washroom, still no sign of her . He searched the whole house but in vain. He thought she might have gone to her parent's house as she was upset and angry when he left her.  He ran to her parent's house downstairs, Mehmat opened the door and told him that Feriha had not come,  not even seen her since evening. Now Emir was worried where she could go. 

            Slowly he went to his home and again checked,  he rang her on her mobile but was surprised when heard the bell in bedroom.  Now he was concerned where she could be.  He suddenly saw that picture on the table was missing in the living room.He went to bedroom,  he looked in the wardrobe in their bedroom and found some of her clothes were also missing. He came out of the apartment as he was leaving,  same time Levant was coming out of his house , ready for morning walk.  He looked at Emir who appeared to be distressed.  He asked him what had happened, was everything alright ? Emir was hesitant, then told him that he could not find Feriha ,she was not in the house.  Emir asked him hesitantly if he had seen her or did he talk to her.  He knew Feriha talked to Levant if she was upset. Levant told him that He had not seen  see Feriha since yesterday. Levant told Emir not to worry, wait for her to return. She might have gone to Gulsum's house .

                     Emir just put his hand into his hair thinking why did not this crossed his mind earlier.  she was upset so she might have gone to Gulsum's place.  He rang up Koraye and asked him if Feriha was at their place. . Koraye told him that Feriha did not come to their place and then tell Emir that let him check with Hande .Emir was now near to tears, blaming himself why didn't he tell her his decision same moment when Feriha put the question. He was restless,  an unknown fear was gripping him if ...did not want to think about if.  Levant took him to his apartment,  gave him water to drink, trying to calm him down but to no avail . Same moment Hande called Emir and asked him what had happened and where was Feriha ? Emir was now kind of in a daze.  Levant took mobile from Emir's hand and told Hande that Feriha had left without saying anything to Emir.  Hande then told Levant that she would  be reaching there with Koraye and requested him   to not let him go alone anywhere.

                                              That same night Gulsum took the decision  that both of them were living a forced  relationship.  Koraye married her only to save her honor and both of them  were at fault that night . Koraye never loved her, took her as a friend only and she took that friendship as love. She told Koraye that she  had decided to divorce him.  She  would not let him suffer anymore as she knew that its Hande who he loved always . All three were hurting in the forced relationship.  Koraye was a little sad for Gulsum but Gulsum told him not to worry about her. Koraye then told her that she was his responsibility.  He would transfer this house in her name and she would then staying  in this house and if she wanted then could call her mother to live with her. He would  send her money every month. He could not  abandon her like orphan. Koraye then told her with wet eyes that she would always be his best friend.

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That time Dr. Zivago theme song came to mind . Somewhere my Love . About hope.Somewhere My Love - Andy Williams ( Dr Zhivago)  

https://vimeo.com/176434292

             He promised her that he would always love  her.  These were the same surroundings that were reminding her those moments.   Irony is , that time she was also scared of future but had Emir with her and knew she was safe with him . Today again she was running , but alone. She did not want to think about  the future.How could she think of future where Emir was not with her.

                                                                       Bus stopped at the stand and with slow steps as if dragging her feet,  she reached the house in the mountains.  She knocked  at the door . Glizar aunt opened the door .She was surprised to find Feriha standing there alone but she masked her expressions . Mr. Ruhi came out of the room at the same moment and smiled at Feriha.

                            Glizar had mixed feelings when she looked at Feriha's face. She embraced her in her arms and took her inside the house . She hinted Ruhi with her eyes not to ask anything . She saw her blank eyes as if had stopped smiling.  She took her to bed and then went to kitchen to bring something hot to drink.  She was worried about her looking at her white ashen face  but decided not the right time to ask her anything and was thinking where Emir was ? What had happened between these two ? She had seen their love for each other.  Feriha got up to freshen up and changed her clothes. Then she softly came to bed.  Glizar asked her that food was ready and she would  bring here for her but Feriha without looking at her,  said that she was not hungry , only wanted to sleep.   Glizar left the room closing the door behind her softly with worried look. She entered living room and found Ruhi lost in thoughts.  Ruhi asked her what had happened ? Was she alright , she seemed to be tired and lost and where was Emir ? Glizar told him that she was sleeping , seems to be exhausted,  will talk to her in the morning. 

                          Feriha pretended to be sleeping but sleep was as if  playing hide and seek with her. She wanted to be lost somewhere far far away where Emir's eyes wouldn't follow her.  She closed her eyes at last ,  tears started flowing as if some dam had burst open . How would  she survive without Emir who was the reason of her existence. She was mentally and physically tired. she was sobbing ,hiding her face in the pillow. She did not know when sleep enveloped her in her arms. 

                        She heard the chirping of birds and spread her hands to feel Emir beside her but then realized she was alone in the bed. It was the same bed where both had slept when were staying in the house . A small smile lingered on her face when she remembered Emir bringing breakfast for her .Both were so happy that day. It was as if only yesterday. Both were so happy. she did not want to go back and Emir was excited like a kid when she told him. He eagerly wanted to live here. Only if she had. So many of Only ifs are left in life.

How life changes like seasons. Nothing remains the same.  With a jerk she came back to present . It was sunny morning . She felt the whiff of fresh air from the window. She was trying to forget the conversation she had heard. How and when did change came in their lives which caught them unaware.  Both of them became strangers as if some line was drawn. She was missing Emir's presence in her life and Emir used to come  early morning , tired and spent.  They both were drifting apart because of  lack of communication.  She tried to remember when was the last time when both had laughed together,  had dinner.  She wanted to help Emir by getting some job. Emir told her to first finish her education.   She knew Emir was introvert . He rarely shared his problems with her,  he did not want her to be burdened with problems he was facing with.  She was missing  her mother's presence more now.  

      Emir was feeling helpless, did not know where to find Feriha. He took his car and drove to the seaside where he used to go.  He stood there , looking at the horizon , lost in thoughts as if something shattered inside him. Repenting why did he left  without giving Feriha the answer she was expecting to listen.  It was all his fault. Why and when did distances started invading in their lives that both were caught unaware.  He felt someone standing with him and looked sideways then saw Levant stood behind him. Levant started talking as if to himself . Somewhere he also was feeling guilty If he had not revealed his love to Feriha.  He knew that Feriha only loved Emir and she  trusted him enough to pour her fears to him and he took advantage of that trust . He knew Emir did not like him . He knew the reason too . He thought it's the time , he should be going back to his old life,  to the sea where he found his anchor. He put his hand on Emir's shoulder as if telling him not to worry.  Then Levant saw Koraye's car approaching , he lelt knowing Koraye will not leave Emir alone.  

    Emir was lost in his thoughts,not knowing what's happening around him. Koraye came and looked at Levant ,then he went to Emir.  Koraye knew he will find Emir at the lighthouse. Levant left them alone . Emir looked at Koraye with blank eyes. Koraye hugged him, he could feel Emir's pain what he was going through. How all this had happened . Why did Feriha left Emir ? Even Emir was baffled, had no answers.  What made her to leave the house ? He was coming to her in the morning . She knew that she was the part of his existence.  

                  Memories were passing by him.  It was the same place where he had thrown  the ring in the sea when Feriha had  told him that she did not deserve the ring . And same was the place where he had stood restless the whole night, waiting eagerly for any news of Feriha. He wanted to run to her, waiting for any news was killing him.

     When Feriha was taken inside brutally beaten by Mahmat  then he had left the place , if he had stayed there , Koraye had not stopped him,  he would have killed Mehmat . Her father pleading him to not beat Mehmat. How dared he beat  Feriha like an animal.  

   She looked like a doe , fear in her eyes,  trying to escape from mehmat .  That time he wanted to take her with him far far away from the madding crowd , holding her safely in the sanctuary of his arms , never to come back. He could still  feel the fear in her eyes. Memories were tormented him.  

                                           Hande went to Emir's apartment and Gulsum went to her mother downstairs.  Reza was worried about Feriha now but did not want to tell Zehra yet .He did not know that Feriha was going to talk to her mother as she was closer to her.   Feriha might come back soon soon. He knew her temper but was aware of the fact too that she could not stay away from Emir. Why he did not get closer to her daughter after Zehra left for village?  Why did he kept her at distance that she could not come to her own family if she needed them?  She loved the family but he and Mehmat both betrayed her...Only  if he could turn the clock back , tears were running down his cheeks. He very late understood what gem kind of person Emir was. He was not like his father.   

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And on the other side Emir was also thinking about the time they both had spent together in that house in mountains. That was the best part of his life.  He could have done anything to bring her smile back. 

Why did Feriha left him alone, she knew that she was his strength. He felt as if life had been sucked.  He thought he should give ad in the newspapers but then stopped himself . He thought he should talk to Hande and Koraye about media.

                             She kept on walking but then realized it was getting late and Gulizer aunt and uncle will be worried about her. She turned back and reached home and found both standing outside , looking at her with concern. She felt listless after her walk , memories were every where.  Glizar kissed her forehead and sat with aunt on the couch. Feriha was in dilemma whether to tell her or not but then thought she should tell them. She asked aunt if she could ring her mother . Glizar nodded smilingly and Feriha rang Zehra. She started crying when she heard Zehra's voice.  She wanted to tell her but then stopped herself,  she knew, she would be worried and will reach her in no time.  Emir  would  also find out where she was.  She needed time to sort out her life with Emir.  Why they both drifted away from each other slowly. Love never disappeared, still was residing in their souls,  part of their existence.  But some unknown shadow had entered where both were in some kind of haze. Both of them were avoiding to look into each other eyes from some time. 

                           When Zehra heard her voice she felt her voice was shaky.  She knew at once something was not right.  On hearing Zehra's voice she started crying but then muffled her cries.  Zehra lovingly told her that she was missing her and she will always be her little princess, never forget that. But why she was sounding so sad now when she had her prince with her. On hearing this she could not muffle her tears, she felt she could not talk as  tears choked her throat. Then Glizar took phone from Feriha.  Feriha ran to her bedroom. Glizar then talked to Zehra. She told Zehra that she should not worry about Feriha,  she was her daughter too. She would  see what could be done and how to smoothen the matter between the two.  She promised Zehra not to worry about Feriha.  She would call her again , once let her settle down. Feriha was looking mentally and physically  weak.  And then she put  the phone down.

                                                Feriha was crying bitterly now .Glizar let her shed tears so that she could feel light.  She left the room,  closing the door behind her. She will talk to her when she would be calm down a bit. She wanted to know the reason for her misery.  She had Emir's mobile number but thought let Feriha tell her first then she would contact Emir. All thoughts were running into her mind. 

                                            Hande was concerned for both of them. she wanted to solve the puzzle what had made Feriha leave the house leaving Emir in lurch.  She knew something to do with Nights and previous night something had happened that made Feriha to leave the house.  Feriha was not the person who could  be broken easily. She thought its time to talk to Ece.  She rang her up and asked her if something happened previous night ? Ece told her that Emir told his decision previous night that he was leaving the job, would not work any more for Nights. He told that he had decided to handle his own night clubs. She also had resigned,  going to US with Yavuz who was fed up with mafia business,  had plans to settle there.  Ece said she was sorry and then told her she never had any intention to hurt Emir.  When she came to know that Feriha was his life. She had distanced herself , Yavuz also becoming threat to Emir because of her . It was better that she moved herself away from Emir. Ece then bid goodbye and hanged up. Now Hande's brain was working overtime.  Something must had happened the previous night and Emir had the answers. It was time to talk to Emir.

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Hande thought it's the time to visit Levant . She went and knocked at his apartment door . Levant was getting ready and asked Hande to come inside . She saw Levant's bags on the bed , clothes scattered all over the bed.  She looked at him sarcastically then asked him if he had any idea what would have happened as he  was always following her like shadow. She used to pour all her problems to him . There must be something that shattered her and she left quietly without telling anyone . Levant told her that he did not meet her previous day , he was already entangled in his own problems concerning his brother.  Then Levant looked up at directly into her eyes and opened his heart for once in his life before Hande .

                    He was tired now.  Feriha's disappearance had broken him somewhere and he was feeling guilty also.  He felt guilty for abandoning his younger brother and mother. He became selfish, only thought of himself when left the home , rebelled against his father's autocratic ways.  He did wrong with Sanem too,  he led her on when he knew she was falling for him. He had lived his life on his terms,  never tied himself in relations. Feriha changed his outlook looking at the life.  He treated her like kid in the starting. She was naive , innocent , found her insecure because of her love for Emir. She talked to him indirectly about her life , then her lies , her insecurities , her fears about losing Emir,  his love.  

          She used to talk only about Emir,  He could see pain , fear in her eyes. Her day as if started with Emir and ended with Emir.  Once she jumped from the boat and then he saved her life at the nick of the time,  when he asked her why she did so,  she said as if Emir was calling her from the depth of the sea and she surrendered herself to him.

                        How insensitive he became that he tried to create rift in their life despite had seen numerous times their unshakable bonding , their love for each other. Only if he had befriended Emir too.  He was more mature. Then he gazed at her with his piercing eyes, sadly asked her do one had control over whom to love and whom to not ? He never knew when did he fall in love with Feriha.He became selfish, he wanted to protect her. Then continued saying what an irony that he was protecting her from her love. She had eyes only for Emir.  Emir knew what i felt for her and that why he was jealous when there was nothing for him to get jealous. Love could be weakness and same time could be strength. He had seen Feriha getting stronger to handle any situation. Levant paused , told  Hande that Sanem rang him a while ago that his brother went back to father to complete his studies and she was coming back to Cansu who had forgiven her. Both need support. Sanem would be coming with her daughter Palin.  He would give credit to Sanem for handling Bulent. 

                       Levant looked at Hande again sadly and then saw Emir standing in the doorway like a statue. He was looking at Levant , he must had listen the conversation.  Then  in a lighter tone told Emir who could be better person than him to tell him that only he is the centre of her universe. " You both lacked mutual  understanding , trust factor & communication gap otherwise where was the need for third person in your life."Levant on serious note told Emir. Levant came forward and hugged Emir, telling him again that Feriha surely would  come back,  she couldn't survive without him.He should trust himself and his love for her. Emir looked at him with a nod then left with Hande.  Levant looking thoughtfully at Emir's back.

                                                                      Glizar saw the tears shimmering in her magnificent eyes and one of them traced unheeded down her smooth cheek.She sat down and Feriha then hugged her and started sobbing again. Glizar moved her hands softly on her head and after sometime Feiha stopped crying and then she told Glizar that she wanted to find some job here.  She requested Aunt not to ask her why she came here.  If she had any problem,  her staying with them then she will leave the house.   Glizar then told her lovingly,  never to talk about leaving . This house belonged to her also . If she accepted her as mother then please tell her what had happened between two of them ? Feriha said she needed some time , Feriha started looking at the job column in the newspaper .

Emir was sitting in his favorite chair , staring blankly at nothing . Koraye Hande exchanged glances . They were worried about Emir . He was not saying anything but his silence spoke volumes. His mind was going dizzy with unanswered questions. He should be getting some sleep.  Aysun , Unal rang up earlier and talked to Hande . Both were worried about Emir and bewildered what had happened and why did Feriha left. Aysun knew Feriha was not a person to give in to easily, she  fought back. She had not left Emir when Ruya accused Emir . She stood with him like pillar of strength . She was Emir's strength . Hande had told her not to come now as they were trying Emir to get some sleep .

                   This music track is from all time classic Casablanca . Here Humphrey Bogart as Rick is thinking about the days he met Ingrid Bergman as Ilsa .Casablanca is city,s name. It goes with Emir where he is missing the presence of Feriha in his life.Past moments spent together starts haunting him.  It's the number playing in the background . Wanted to use this track on Emir Feriha . Its about longing , yearning.  

Bertie Higgins ( Casablanca 1942)

https://vimeo.com/173777200

                                   Hande was restless,  some way should be there.  She knew Feriha very well now.  Something or someone had hurt Feriha ,she was not the easy person to give in. She could not stay away for long from Emir.  But some idea was taking shape in Hande's mind and she was pleased with her idea,  Koraye at the same time looked at her , knew something was cooking in her brain.  Koraye gave some medication to Emir so that he could sleep. He took him to his bedroom and then left him to sleep. He returned to living room. 

                          Hande was thoughtful , sipping the coffee which Koraye had made for her.  Both were lost in thoughts. Hande was thinking how strange life was. She played havoc in Emir Feriha's life so many times to separate them. But every time both bonded more strongly as if some unknown force brought them back together. They both had weathered so many storms in their journey of life. Then why now, when Emir was making efforts to stand up on his own ? It was quite incomprehensive.  Feriha fought like tigress when it concerned to Emir. What shattered her that she had left Emir alone ? Hande could not see Emir in such situation now. She was restless. She couldn't see Emir suffering . Feriha also became the part of her life along with Emir. She had accepted that Feriha was Emir's happiness. Now where and how to find Feriha,  became her mission.

                                          Feriha was looking ads. in the newspaper for job. she was in the living room.  It was her 3rd days in the house . She was not talking much and most of the time Glizar found her staring at nothing . Both husband wife decided that Glizar should talk to Feriha now , what had happened between her and Emir which left her shattered physically and mentally .TV was on and Ruhi was surfing the channels then Gulizer just saw that movie-Gone With The Wind was running.  She asked Feriha if she would like to see the movie it's some time that they had not seen any movie. Then She said lets watch Gone With The Wind asking her if she had seen ? Feriha said no.  Movie was long and left Feriha thoughtful . Gulizer looked at her face asked Feriha what happened ? Feriha at first looked at her blankly then with a abrupt jerk came to present . She without any emotions,like a robot,  told her all that had happened between her and Emir.  Gulizer was listening to her with concern whole time . She wanted to shake Feriha and bring her out from this coldness . She then asked Feriha why didn't she stay there and listened the whole conversation . She should have confronted Emir about what she had heard him saying to the owner. Why did she run away like cowards ? She was not a coward who will run away from problems. She reminded of her past when both came to them and how she had fought the situation. Should  she not be thinking again rationally. Emir who had stood with her lies . stood with her after marrying her , agreeing to her until her family accepted her. He had respected her decision to have space.  Gulizer was softly talking to her about  what she had read in Emir's eyes, was that she was the only person existed for him. She should not be afraid to face Emir,  what he had decided. Was not she punishing herself along with Emir also without knowing the whole truth?

                                    Gulizer looked at her  seriously, once again spoke," Sometimes we react , listening to half conversation as you have seen  in the movie." And this was the only reason she wanted her to see the movie . Rhett listened the half conversation and made his own conclusions not once letting her explain and left Scarlett.  But for Scarlett tomorrow was another day.  She was ready to face tomorrow.  Same situation she was in where she had reacted listening to only incomplete conversation. Why did she left Emir and made her own conclusions. Was her love so weak ? Did not she trust herself ? Feriha had no answers . Gulizer left her alone sitting there for a while .  She thought Feriha needed space to clear the webs from her eyes so that she could see clearly.

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Emir was looking for the pictures of their wedding and  found  in the drawer . Sometimes something triggers and past comes rushing back . Emir was in the same situation , cursing himself for not telling his decision to her that very moment she asked him .A hint of sad smile flickered on his face when he saw Feriha smiling at him in wedding picture . Both were so happy that day only if only time had frozen then, enveloping them forever .

While writing Emir getting into past with marriage memories .SPEAK SOFTLY, LOVE ---Andy Williams

https://vimeo.com/179904184

Emir could not sleep ,he was sitting on his bed and again pictures took him to past as if it was only yesterday he collided with her and she didn't looked at him even .That moment was something new for him as he was used to girls running after him. How curious he was to know about her. She was fiery. She did not care who was He. "First Experience in my life where I was scolded."

He fell in love with her at first sight and after that he didn't want her to lose . Now he could understand the bruise under her eye when he met her second time in the hospital sitting on the bench at night. 

Again he went to meet her and she said it's all finished and he saw wound on her lips but it never crossed his mind that her father had hit her. Why could not he understand her eyes which asked him to look into them.

Thinking of this number that gels with Emir that time . 

Michael Bolton - How Am I Supposed To Live Without You

https://vimeo.com/175583106

So much she went through for her love, for him, Why couldn't he read her eyes which used to be sad and appealing him to understand her. Emir remembering how he had promised her that he will love all her faces. And when the time came he had forgotten his promises. How shocked he was when truth was staring at his face . 

He knew something was not right with her as she was not smiling any more. He found the letter along with pictures ,  He then read the letter which was in the drawer where she has written about her. Letter which was supposed to be on for his eyes , his mother got that letter. That time while reading he did not notice the tear drops which had merged the words. But now when he read again then realized what kind of emotional trauma she must be going through. Her tears reflected her pain , her insecurity. Love makes you blind when truth is facing you .

                                                 

He fulfilled the dream of them getting married in snowfall. Emir came to present when Gulizer  appeared in the doorway.  She was taken aback when saw Emir sitting in the living room with Ruhi. Ruhi with eyes' expressions hinted her not to speak about Feriha . She came into the room and welcomed Emir who stood up to greet her.  She smiled at him and asked him how was Feriha and why he had come alone?  Emir was silent for a while , evaded looking at her.  Ruhi asked Gulizer to bring tea for him. Feriha that time was in the bedroom upstairs. She heard some noise downstairs but then ignored thinking some neighbor might had come to visit.   

                                 Emir was thinking how Hande took the matters in her hand. He did not know where to look for her.  Hande had suggested  him to find her in the places that meant precious to both of them. Both wanted to come with him,  looking at the condition he was in.  But  he assured them not to worry about him , he will bring Feriha along with him .  With hint of wavering smile he had left them standing on the steps. Again he was lost in past 

                                 Gulizer decided not to tell Feriha about Emir's presence yet. She first wanted to talk to him.  Gulizer brought tea with some snacks knowing he might not had eaten properly. Emir face was the reflection of what he was going through. He looked shaken up . Gulizer was sad when she thought of these two tormented souls,  pining for each other.  Emir hand was shaking when he took the tea from Gulizer.  She smiled at him gently.  Emir slowly told them what had happened. How he had neglected Feriha while he was trying to stand on his own. He wanted to give her the best. She had never asked him for anything. 

                    He sadly smiled sarcastically saying that people thought of her as gold digger.  To his own amusement he recalled that he himself had not bought any dress or even a single flower for her. They both never felt the need of worldly presents to express their love. Emir pause many times, then continued with,  after going back  getting married, what upheavals both of them faced with passage of  time. They both faced the turbulent waters  together. But both of them lost each other somewhere in the race of being successful. He was baffled why did Feriha left him without any explanations.

                                          Feriha came downstairs when she thought it's a long time Gulizer aunt had not called her or not come to her.  She stopped at the door when she saw the back . She thought it was Emir then realized her imagination was playing with her again. As she turned, she heard Emir's voice. so she was not imagining after all.  He was here.  She was shocked to find him sitting there. 

          She stood still as if turned into a statue. Gulizer & ruhi both looked at  her with concern. Emir followed their gaze and saw her standing in the door. He abruptly sprang to his feet as if got life on its own.  Emir was staring at her with a kind of desperate intensity and she sensed a question in his eyes. She was scared what he might tell her. 

                         Suddenly she could not bear it . she had to get away and be alone. In one lithe movement she ran to the door, slamming it shut behind her.  Dimly she heard Emir's voice cry her name. But even that could not stop her, she grabbed her jacket , was outside , running away from the house as though pursued. Its light glowed more and more dimly until the whirling snow crystals finally obliterated them. 

                                Staggering through the fresh snow, she stumbled on. Tree branches grabbed at her sleeve with sharp needles. She tripped over a hidden rock and almost fell. The hill side slope was so steep because of snow that carried her forward with speed and she was unable to see in front of her.  She slammed into a tree trunk and her cry of pain was lost in the wind. she sank to the ground, nursing her sore shoulder, sobbing with pain.

                                    For the first time since her headlong flight from the house, she came to her senses. It was all unexpected;  Emir's appearance had shocked her. Huddled under the tree, she stared out into the world of black and white. Darkness and snow nothing else. She remembered the night when both had played in the snow in the same house. 

                      That night she was not alone, Emir was with her.  Why was she running away from Emir? She was tired now of running away from Emir. Should not she be listening to her heart not her mind? She was wet and cold and lost.  A sob of fear broke from her lips. She pushed herself upright, dragging her feet she moved towards the house. She started up the slope. She stopped for breath, leaning against the rough bark for support, her eyes closed.

                                Suddenly darkness was illuminated with yellow beam of a torch and she was gathered in Emir's arms, "Thank God I've found you, he muttered roughly," You little idiot -running away like that ! Why were you running away from me Feriha . Are you not tired of running, my beautiful wife ?"

This number came to my mind whenever i saw Emir yearning for Feriha and she was running away from him.

Enrique Iglesias number Escape

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2QsNwuceA8

She felt like heaven to be safe in his arms .It was like coming home. It felt like an era had passed when both were together. He picked her up but Feriha protested weakly that he would not be able to carry her all the way to house. 

Emir smiled into her eyes, "I think you seem to have short memory dear wife,  have you forgotten when I have carried you  on my shoulder from hostel to our home." She shivered, hid her face in Emir's jacket.  Within minutes they reached the house. Gulizer and Ruhi were waiting with concern.  Emir told them that she was alright. If they permitted then he would  take her to the bedroom that they had stayed before. 

Gulizer told Emir to take Feriha in the bedroom and better she change into fresh clothes, She might be cold and wet.  Feriha felt drained of energy as though she was floating somewhere in the space, watching a tall, broad -shouldered man carry his wife. How deceptive appearance could be , she thought sadly.

Emir now and then was looking at her face seriously, Feriha was trying to avoid his intense gaze . Her vision was blurred with unshed tears in her eyes. The pain of seeing him again seared through her with unbearable waves of agony,  but she could not tear her gaze away when Emir was not looking at her,   from the man she loved. She realized it was not only she who was suffering but Emir's haunted eyes told her the same story. 

           Emir put her down on the rug gently near the fireplace and asked her to change into dry clothes.  Then he left to bring the logs. She lacked both the energy and will to argue. She could hear the faint sounds of Emir's footsteps and guessed that he must be bringing the logs to light the fire. Her mind was buzzing with questions. How did he know where she was and reached here?  Who had told him about her whereabouts, mother or Gulizer aunt? After changing into warm clothes she went into the bedroom. 

Emir without looking at her casually asked if she was feeling better. She sat down on the rug near the fireplace. Emir gave the hot cup of coffee to her and had poured himself a drink. He himself was feeling mentally drained.

          He sat on the chair opposite her, looking at her with piercing eyes. Feriha was avoiding looking at him. She had noticed how tired and haggard he looked as if had not slept. She was hesitant about telling him that she had followed him to the club. Room was enveloped with silence. Emir stood up near the window looking outside in the dark then asked her seriously why she left him without any explanations when he had told her to wait for him as he had to finish the work in the Nights.  Then what had happened in that time that she left him without giving a thought about  him. She answered him that they should talk in the morning as he might be tired after driving for long time. 

 Emir turned again looked at her sardonically: "Really! You seem to be concerned Feriha ? Do you realize what kind of hell you had put me through,  I was going through all the time thinking why and what made you leave me?" 

 Feriha examined the dark depths of his eyes, trying to find the warmth behind coldness. She had only loved him and he will be the only one till her last breath. Emir pulled her to her feet and brought her near to him. He felt how fragile she was looking. Her eyes had lost the sparkle. Looking into her eyes he  told her  he  had only loved her and always will. 

                                  Feriha looked at him for a moment then told him that she had followed him to the Nights that night when he had left her without giving any answer. She had heard him talking about his life with Ece and Nights and he was raising toast to that. She could not bear anymore and left him. She only wanted his happiness. How could she be obstacle in the way of what he wanted. She did not have the courage to face his decision. She did not want to embarrass him, she felt it was better for both of them that she should leave. She was totally shattered first time . Even Ruya incident had not broken her.   Now She could not stop her tears. 

               Emir slowly cupped her face in his hands and looked into her teary eyes .He smiled tenderly looking at her.

'Feriha you should have stayed there and heard the whole conversation. Ece never meant anything to me. I was only trying to protect her from Yavuz. When you asked me to choose then I realized the futility of efforts if you were not in my life. Ece realized that she was the reason of our miseries and threat to our lives and happiness because of yuvaz.  She had already decided to resign and she did so. I also have resigned from my job.'Emir continued. 

'Father has asked me to take control of his business as he wanted to live peacefully with mother without any pressure. He was sorry whatever he did with me or with you and your family. So much had changed in that one night. I was free and happy.   Wishing if I could fly and reach you and tell you what I wanted. Why did it ever crossed your mind that I can have life with you. You are my life and always will be. I can't imagine life without you. Where did my wild cat wife disappear?  You should have come inside and confronted me, fought with me. How could you leave me without any fight,"

                          Feriha saw the sheen of tears in his eyes. A hard lump filled her throat, choking her so completely that she couldn't say the words that filled her heart. Her eyes fixed on his proud, handsome face, a tear slipped from her lashes, and then another, sliding unchecked downs her cheeks as Emir frowned in pain at the sight of them.

           Taking two shaking steps, she hugged Emir resting her head on his chest .His arms folded around her and he rested his cheeks on her head, caressing her hair softly, kissing her forehead. 

                      Feriha whispered softly, 'Emir forgive me please. I have tormented both of us. Why did I react listening to only incomplete conversation? I was going through turmoil those days. First Yavuz then your mom warned me about Ece. How come I thought that you will choose your work? Remember those last days we were drifting apart, you did not have time even to smile. You were always looking so tired. I was missing my old Emir who was lost somewhere in the struggle for success. Emir do you remember once I told you about my dream of house in the classroom. I never expected much from life. It was only you with me.' Feriha smiled through her tear filled eyes.

 'Life is beautiful when you smile at me. In the race of future we were forgetting our present. You always knew that I would be looking from the window at you and you always looked up expecting me at the window.'  

    "What fools we have been dear," Emir whispered into her hair. " We nearly ruined our lives."

"But we did not Emir. We have rest of it" Her hands reached up to his face, her fingers touching the drops of tears on his cheeks.

                         Emir tenderly looked into her questioning eyes, cupping her face, "Feriha, you will get cold sitting here. Go to the bed, I will bring my bag from the car parked outside. I will answer the questions lurking in your eyes.' He left smiling at her. 

                She heard the sound of closing door. She was perplexed how come Emir knew that he would find her here. He seemed to be certain to find her here. Why did she not trust Emir?They had so much to talk about. It appeared as if ages had passed, she had not seen old Emir as if in ages . 

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                                   Continued===============