One of many...
If she was asleep until a moment ago, she was surely awake now. It felt like she was picked up and dunked into a drum of
water, college and school principals did that overseas to raise money for a cause. Drowning, gasping coming up for air
She didnt know how to swim, she watched shows on TV when people pushed into the water, flailed their arms and legs and struggled to rise up
She visualized... she didnt gasp though, thankfully
AZHAADE DI
NOPE!!!
I AM SORRY I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAY
I DIDNT EXPECT HIM TO SAY THAT
HE HAS NO IDEA HOW MUCH YOU ARE HURTIN
AYYO! PAAVAM KANNA NEE
Her three "mental occupants" "mental"? occupants chorused
She cleared her throat and made a enormous effort to be "cool and casual"
Two things she had no clue how to do
Seeing Marliese in her living room in Paris had killed her
Sorry! HIS living room
Seeing him with her at Hyatt when she went with Sree
She HATED HIM, like she would even be ready to kill him
she had no idea why she felt like that about him
UMMM... SAY SOMETHING CASUAL AND UBER COOL
"What about your choice?" she croaked
Startling him... she smiled gently pulling away
He smelled like those trees in Paris, or that house in Paris
He smelled like everything about her honeymoon, the bed the bathroom, the towels and the couch
Even the paperbacks he read smelled like him
She moistened her lips
He held her by her elbows
"I will sit and you can tell me all about it... not it (chuckling) them" she said "Them"
"Its not important" he said shutting down...
"I cant believe Sam would say anything mean" II whispered, staring out at the ridge, misty black, inky black... like the night itself
"II" he scrambled to changed the topic
"Umm..." her heart hammered in her chest, a wave of weakness washed over bringing with it nausea
She got up, gently unwilling to make it known to him
"I drank so much juice" she lied
"Did Vandita say something?" he asked worried, unwilling to talk about his HUGE ASS blunder
She turned from the twin doorway and smiled "Illaye" "akka is fine" she smiled
His phone rang thankfully... he pulled it out of his pocket and II escaped,
she let tears flow as she retched in the sink, bolting the "sink area" door behind her
She hit her favorites playlist, Kaatrin Mozhi from Mozhi
Kaatrin Mozhi Oliyaa Isaiyaa
is the language of the wind sound or music?
Poovin Mozhi Niramaa Manamaa
is the language of the flowers colors or fragrance?
Kadalin Mozhi Alaiyaa Nuraiyaa
is the language of the ocean waves or foam?
Kaadhal Mozhi Vizhiyaa Idhazhaa
is the language of love the eyes or the lips?
Iyarkaiyin Mozhigal Purinthuvidil
if we understand the language of nature
Manitharin Mozhigal Thevai illai
we don't need the languages of man
Idhayathin Mozhigal Purinthuvidil
if we understand the language of the heart
Manitharku Mozhiye Thevai illai...
men don't need language
She frequently forgot, she was "one of many" to him
One of many... things that he did to her, menopause, ecstasy, homicidal behavior,
compulsive lying, chronic night owl like him, unwilling to sleep before making love, fighting till she drew blood, and he made her forget her place in his life
She rinsed her face, brushed, changed into a new nightshirt.
Stared at the half dozen each choora she wore on both wrists, felt them with her thumb, until her vision blurred with tears
She braided her hair, and wore another bindi, walked to her balcony and sat on her pod swing
Leaning on the rail looking down at the tennis court on the side...
Like a race track the starting point changed frequently she realized.
Just when she completed one leg of the marathon, a few extra miles got added, or a shot was fired making it the start all over again
She was at the start all over again now
She wasnt expecting him to announce his sisters didnt care for his "partners"
She wondered if any of them were like her
She knew Marliese wasnt like her at all.
She was sure... oh ya... no... she wasnt, she told herself furiously
as sure as she was about everything about her life this nano second
She gently wiped away two fat tears.
Kaatrin Mozhi Oliyaa Isaiyaaa
Poovin Mozhi Niramaa Manamaa
Kaatru Veesum bothu Thisaigal Kidayaathu
when the wind blows, there's no direction
Kaadhal Pesum bothu Mozhigal Kidaiyaathu
when love talks, there's no language
Pesum Vaarthai Pola Mounam Puriyaathu
like you can understand spoken words, you can't understand silence
Kangal Pesum Vaarthai Kadavul Ariyaathu
the words that the eyes speak, god doesn't know
Ulavi Thiriyum Kaatruku Uruvam Theeta Mudiyaathu
The wandering wind that defies direction, cannot be given a form
Kadhal Pesum Mozhiyellam Sathakootil Adangaathu
all the languages that speak love, cannot be constricted to the world of sound
Iyarkaiyin Mozhigal Purinthuvidil
Manitharin Mozhigal Thevai illai
Idhayathin Mozhigal Purinthuvidil
Manitharku Mozhiye Thevai illai...
Kaatrin Mozhi...
He was on the phone speaking in French, as if he went looking all over the house
His face broke into a smile
He paused his call and walked over to her "Were u sick?" he asked
She shook her head lying, and yawned forcefully
"I see u are in bed now" he said
He said something on the phone and hung up walking towards her
She smiled stepping back he noticed lest he touch her
Stumbling on a pot
He reached offering his hand She held the rail, as if warning him not to touch
"Can we talk?" he asked seriously hands tucked in his pocket not trying to touch her again
She looked distressed, with a brave face
AYYO!!!
NO NO NO
VENDAAM
I DONT WANT TO KNOW ANYTHING
I PRETEND THEY DONT EXIST
I CAN DO IT WELL
I AM A MASTER AT THAT CRAFT
I DONT WANT TO KNOW DA
Vaanam Pesum Pechu Thuliyaai Veliyaagum
The skies speak the language of rain
Vaanavillin Pechu Niramaai Veliyaagum
The rainbow speaks through its colors
Unnmai Oomai Aanal Kaneer Mozhi Aagam
If the truth is silenced, tears become a language
Pennmai Oomai Aanal Naanam Mozhi Aagum
If femininity is silenced, her shyness will become a language
Osai Thoongum Jaamathil Ucchi Meengal Mozhiyaagum
When all sounds are asleep, little stars become the language
Aasai Thoongum Idhayathil Asaivu Kooda Mozhiyaagum
In the heart where desires lie, restlessness too becomes a language
Iyarkaiyin Mozhigal Purinthuvidil
Manitharin Mozhigal Thevai illai
Idhayathin Mozhigal Purinthuvidil
Manitharku Mozhiye Thevai illai...
"Not right now?" he offered
She nodded, and shook her head and nodded
Unwilling to say a word
As if she had gone into the bathroom and vowed
She would never ever say a word to him
Ever again
"Looks like its about to rain, do u want to go in?" he asked
She shook her head
I CANT
I JUST CANT
BACK INTO THAT ROOM?
NO!!
MUDIYAVE MUDIYADU
"II" he cooed
She turned away from him facing the Zambian diplomat's residence as tears formed again
A huge akward uncomfortable silence penetrated between the two and started setting up home quickly
New drapes, comfy furniture and all
He was terrified of telling her anything about his past
She was frightened he was going to..😭
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Edited by Nisha0604 - 8 years ago
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