IshRa TS : Teri Meri Khamoshiyaan
Part 1
I sat on the beach and saw my little baby playing with water with his siblings...i smiled at my baby boy...who was splashing water with his tiny hands...and to be honest i never expected this moment in my life...i never expected that my life will give me a chance to witness these beautiful moments...moments of family...a perfect family...i still remember the black days of my life...now you'll probably thinking that what i am talking about...well it was the worst nightmare that came true...not even in my dreams i can see my love and my life parting ways from me...but it happened...and trust me...its very painful...no...you are getting wrong...it was not a heartbreak...but a choice..
we can say...my soul left me...and i Turned into a mere lifeless body...it was one such day...which turned my whole life upside down...which snatched away my identity...of being a mother...of being a daughter-in-law ...of being a wife...a moment which shattered my beautiful dream...Still the memories of that day...the day which changed my life drastically...are quite fresh in my mind...it was hard on my part to erase it from my mind...heart...but i remember i was just another lifeless body...
You must be curious to know about what i am talking ... Well i Ishita Raman Bhalla...
Is quite free right now...and living my dream...so i won't mind sharing it with you all...it was just an encounter with the reality of my life...an encounter which I always dreaded...lets move to the day... When it all started...
3 Years Ago...
Delhi...
Akash Ganga Society
It was about midnight when i woke up with a jerk and ran to washroom...It was becoming my routine since last 2 days...midnight vomits and morning sickness were added to my daily schedule...
That night Raman asked me to get my full health check up done...like every other concerned hubby he too was quite stressed out watching my health declining... And pale face every morning... So finally like his good madasan i accepted his offer for a health check up ...which was much needed...
As soon as we reached our doctor''s. Clinic...he got an important call from Mihir...
As he got busy with his call...i entered the cabin...the lady doctor offered me the seat which i gladly accepted...I smiled at her and told her about my health issues...She smiled at me and said "you are a doctor too Ishita... I am surprised you didn't get to know the reason for your sickness.."
I looked at her confusingly and said "what...i am sorry doctor i didn't get you..."
"Don't worry everything Is fine Ishita...and before i come to any conclusion i just needed to do some test...thats it..." She smiled at me and started with her test. After few minutes i was sitting waiting for the doctor to arrive. She came and while sitting she said " congratulations Ishita...you are pregnant..." As the words escaped her mouth I stared at her with an expressionless face...It was something i hadn't expected In my life...never expected these words will belong to me...is it true or just another misunderstanding...I had to confirm...i gathered my senses and asked "Doctor...are you sure about it...i...i mean...mai ..kaise pregnant ho sakti hu..."
Doctor looked at me strangely and asked " Why Ishita...
Is there any problem..." I sighed and told her the biggest truth of my life...but to my surprise she smiled at me and said "I know what you mean Ishita...trust me...after listening to you..i believed now...that miracles do happen..."
I was still not sure what she wanted to say...so i again asked not believing my senses "Doctor...what are you talking about...please clarify... It's something very big for me..."
"Ishita...i know it's hard to believe..but let me tell you..apparently...your test show that you are pregnant... I think the blockages in your tubes have been decreased to a level...it is A good sign...i just need to do some tests more...to know the exact situation..."
"I am still not sure doctor...i wanted to wait for my test reports...please...its really a big thing for me... Throughout my life i had waited for this day..."
"I understand...you can just collect your reports in evening...but trust me...result is going to be same..."
I bid bye to her. By the time i reached near car he stared at me and said "kya huya...kya kaha doctor ne..."
I looked in his eyes...for a minute i thought to tell him the truth...but i do not know if i should tell him or not...i really don't want to hurt his expectations of becoming a father again..so i decided against it
..and shrug away the question with an excuse.
"Nothing serious raman...bs kuch bahar ka khane ki wajah se stomach infection hai..shaam tak reports bhi aa jayengi...don't worry.." Ishita said not meeting his eyes.
"Achha thik hai...shaam ko mai reports lete ve..." Even before he can complete she interrupted him and said "no...it's okay ..waise bhi mai clinic aaungi...toh i will collect reports while returning...chale...late ho raha hai..."
Raman was confused seeing her behaving differently... He wanted to ask further but finding her indifferent and least affected he thought of asking it later...
We reached home and he left for office...whole day the conversation with doctor clouded my mind...as i registered the fact my face lit up with utmost happiness one could feel...i was just not able to believe...i can become a mother...i can conceive... It was something I never expected...i was having mixed emotions...
Till now my life kept me in agony of not being able to bear a child...i always thought what rather how it feels to keep a child in your womb for nine months... To what extent one will feel the happiness when she will become a mother... When she will hold her child in her hands for the first time...
Life could be really unexpected at times...meeting ruhi was my fate...marrying raman was my destiny... And now...bearing child in my womb... Its something i don't know how to express...as I paced in my room...i recollected all the moments when people had accused me of being a barren...when Subbu had left me ...when his mother taunted me of being an incapable of bearing a child...
Leaving all these dark memories behind she thought of the time when she first met ruhi...her life changed...she got everything one can wish for...because of ruhi...she got raman...her love...
As the clock struck 5 in evening... She rushed to the doctor's clinic and after collecting reports she waited for the doctor. She had a choice of seeing her reports all by herself but for some strange reason she waited for the doctor. As soon as doctor arrived... She gone through the reports thoroughly ..after like eternity for her...she spoke
"Ishita...now please listen to whatever i am saying carefully..." As she said that i felt a kind of fear inside me...but keeping my nerves cool i nodded while she continued "I was not wrong Ishita...you are pregnant..." As she confirmed my face lit up...and tears started flowing down my cheeks...i controlled my emotions and gestured her to continue..."but...ishita you have to take extra care of yourself... As your body is too weak to bear a healthy child...and then above that your problem...it may have decreased... But then scars are still there...neither it is cured...you understand what i am trying to say...and apart from that you have to be extra careful as there are complications...but it is not something we can't control...medical science and new technologies... All you have to do is take good care of yourself...and now the baby too...congratulations... "
As i thanked her...i directly made my way to bhalla house...to share this happiness...the biggest moment of my life...as soon i reached the door...i stopped there for a while calming my nerves and washing away my tears...
After entering inside ...she found unusual silence around...she found it strange...but shrugging away the thought...she moved to her room...
While walking towards her room she heard some voices coming from Toshiji's room. She made her way towards the room not being sure what is happening...As soon as she reached she saw the room door ajar...She slightly push the door and saw Toshiji crying uncontrollably. She knew that Aditya...her grandson was the sole reason behind her tears. She too felt helpless that she cannot bring Adi back to her...But she knew she can at least fill the part not fully but partly...She smiled and touched her belly and took a step forward to move in when she heard what knocked out her senses.
"Bhalla Ji...ishita toh kabhi maa nahi bann sakti...Raman ka koi aur beta nahi hai...aur ab Romi bhi...Bhallaji..mera vansh hee khatam ho jayega...kuch kariye...Mujhe mera Adi wapus chahiye..." Toshiji sobbed more while Mr. Bhalla look helplessly...
"Toshiji...aap fikar kyu karti ho...Bhagwaan pe bharosa rakho...wo hume niraash nahi karega...dekhna Ishita bhi jaldi he..' even before he can complete She said
"Bhallaji...aap hee btayiye...chahe Ishita maa bann sake ya nahi...Phir bhi hamare Adi ki jagah koi nahi le sakta...Bechara mera Adi...aap raman se kaho na...Shagun ki jo bhi shart hai wo maan le...usse jo bhi chahiye hum denge.,...bas hume hamara Adi lauta de..."
Ishita stood still as she felt that her child could never fill the void of Aditya,...Though she too wanted Aditya back in their house...She silently made her way to her room and stood near the room's window thinking hard about Toshiji's words...When her eyes looked at the person sitting on the bench.
She could almost make out that he was no one but Raman...But what caught her attention was he was crying miserably and he was constantly staring at the piece of papers in his hand. She could not hold herself back and walked down the apartment. She went near him and silently patted his shoulder.
He was startled by this sudden appearance and cleaned his tears which kept flowing continuously. He saw ishita and hid those papers which he was staring since he came back after meeting Shagun.
He looked away not wishing her to show his vulnerable side. She chuckled and sat near him. She held his hand and asked "Kya Baat hai Raman...Is everything fine..."
To which he still looking away replied..."Haan...sab thik hai...tum yaha kya kar rahi ho..."
"Kuch nahi.
.bas dekh rahi thi ki Raavan Kumar apne aasuu chupate ve kaisa dikhta hai. " She said making him smile a bit. In any other situation he would surely have said something in his defense. But to her surprise he hadn't fought back.
She was really tensed thinking about the matter so she held his hand in her both hands and said "Raman...aap jante hai na...mai aapki khamoshiyaan bhi padh sakti hu..." She then wait for a minute and continued " Kya kaha Shagun ne Raman..."
As she completed her sentence Raman looked at her instantly and after like watching her for eternity he holds her in his tight embrace and again started crying. Ishita understood Shagun have again trapped them in some situation.
After few minutes when he became normal he handed her those papers which define his condition very well. As Ishita started reading her eyes became wide and tears of fear flowed from her eyes. Her biggest nightmare took the face of reality.. She never expected that some day it will come true...and it did.. Those contract papers in her hands define her story. Least she could mutter was" Divorce papers ". And with that her world crashed down.
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