FOOLS IN LOVE
Well, she had read it
a million times in her favorite book.
We are all fools in love.
Ha! She mused; it
applied to her present situation to the core. She was acting like an absolute
fool lately and whatever she did, it did not change anything about how she
felt.
It had been a while
since she had resigned to the fact that she had fallen for her husband and even
fewer days from the time she knew that that her feelings for him were mutual.
It certainly had
changed things between them. For starters, It did introduce a lot of new
sensations in her mind and body which she had never experienced earlier even
when she was seriously going around with Subbu. Probably, it had something to
do with their circumstances which time and again ensured that they were unable
to say those three words to each other.
Although, there was
hardly any need to do so with whatever had transpired between them in recent
days. No, they were still to consummate their marriage and she knew it was just
a matter of time and well ... Time and privacy. That is what was lacking between
them these days. But his gestures and his attempt to find that extra second
where he could just be with her made her blush to the core.
With the arrival of
Shagun and Adi in their abode, another dimension was added to their lives. In
hindsight, this sudden change of event had actually acted as a blessing in
disguise because it had been a much needed respite to the father son
relationship. Raman had always walked on egg shells as far as Adi was concerned
and finally he seemed to have found some ground. Although, Adi was still a bit
scratchy and reserved around him, she knew that the dark clouds of their
relationship were slowly and steadily paving way for that small ray of sunshine
and in time this ray will definitely engulf their life with brightness.
Then there was Adi and
her. Well. Unfortunately, the sane part
of her mind kept reminding her that she will never be able to become Ishima to
Adi, however, she had half-heartedly settled for the fact that they had found a
middle ground. She was Adi's Ishita aunty and she accepted it as huge progress.
So, in total,
everything was fine. Adi accepted her. Ruhi and all the family adored her. And
Raman ... well she blushed; Raman, well finally her Ravan Kumar had turned into a
Ram Kumar, ok, as much he could. She will herself rush him to the hospital the
day he stopped teasing her or doing kud kud with her for more than one day.
Alas, she had fallen for the Ravan Kud Kud Kumar.
BUT !!!!! She sighed
and recalled.
We are all fools in love.
Damn her for acting
this way but she felt helpless; or to be precise, her heart felt helpless.
She had not even a
flicker of doubt on Raman's love, but the woman and more so the wife in her
could not help but secretly get jealous at the fact that his ex-wife was right
there in their home, in front of their eyes all the time. She knew it was
stupid and a mad thought but somewhere everytime she saw Shagun and Raman in
the same room, she felt she had competition.
The fact that her
competition happened to be Shagun did not help the matters either. If at all,
it made them worse and elevated these feelings with her constant comparison and
attempt to put her in bad light in front of Raman.
Raman on more
occasions than one had directly or indirectly reprimanded her for her shallow behaviour
which secretly made Ishita feel better as the wife in her could not bring
herself to accept it.
She recalled the other
night when Ruhi had insisted on a late night icecream date and the five of them
gone to Ruhi's favourite ice cream parlor. Five because Adi had refused to go
without Shagun. He was still very possessive and attached to his mother and
although Raman was reluctant, Ishita had silently asked him to oblige for the
sake of their children.
It was a normal
gesture. He would have done it for any woman and she would have called him
considerate; had respected him and even looked at him fondly for being se
gentlemanly. But with Shagun; she reprimanded her mind but her heart refused to
listen to her these days.
They were enjoying
their icecream scoops when a small piece of fell on Shagun's saree. All her
husband did was pick up the tissue paper box from the other table and offer it
to her, and although Murugan knows she had tried her best, yet somewhere deep
inside her heart, she felt a small prick. Of course, she had not missed the
small smirk Shagun had on her face when all this happened.
It was like she was suddenly
divided into two, one with her heart and one with her mind. The sane Ishita and
the Ishita in love. While the former constantly assured her of the fact that
her husband was hers in every which way possible and all this jealousy was so
not her and so .. so serial type, the Ishita in love refused to listen to all
the logic and wanted more and wanted all of him, only absolutely for her.
She also knew,
somewhere, her husband had not failed to notice her discontent and her guarded
behaviour as soon as his ex-wife was around. And since she knew him so well,
she very well understood when he time and again reassured her belief.
She fondly smiled
recalling the moment when he had settled right next to her after giving the
tissue box to Shagun and had silently shared her ice cream scoop even when he
hated black current flavour.
She recalled various
incidents where Shagun had tried to demean her and Raman had stood by her as
her pillar.
While Shagun mocked
her pasta as a mockery of Italian food, he termed it as an invention by his
madrasan and asked for a second serving.
When Shagun tried to
demean Ishita in front of one of Raman's collegue, Raman called himself lucky
to be married to a woman with a perfect combination of beauty and brains who
was able to balance her home and career perfectly.
How could she forget the
face of Shagun when Raman had adviced Adi and Ruhi to take help from Ishita to
prepare for their annual function performance as she was a salsa champion and
will help them easily in learning their dance moves. Shagun was appalled and out rightly rejected
the idea and poor Adi had to struggle to learn everything on his.
All these incidents
had time and again proved that he cared and loved her a lot and there is no way
Shagun could make any more difference in their life than she already did.
Yet somehow all these
seemingly harmless incidences had slowly and silently degrading her self-confidence
in one way or the other. She was getting more conscious of everything she did
around Raman and it was as if she was on guard with him as soon as Shagun was
around.
Lately, Shagun had started
targeting her attire. She had always been raised in a conventional Tamilian
environment so wearing sarees after marriage had come naturally to her. Her
growing up years was filled with some books of competition followed by many
more than the various range of latest cosmetics. So, although she knew she did
look presentable, she could never match Shagun in any way possible.
She had honestly not
bothered about Shagun and her beauty until a few days ago especially until a
few days ago, she stressed. But her words,
"Oh God! I will never understand
how someone can wear such sarees?"
"Maroon and Blue
together! What a hideous combination! I would not even let my maid wear it."
"Ewww. Neelu, please
make sure my clothes are washes separately from these."
"Raman has always liked women
who wear subtle colors. I pity him now."
She had never directly
called her out; never took her name but her eyes, she openly mocked her at each
and every second. So much so that Ishita had subconsciously started losing her
confidence about her own attire. For the past few days, all she had done was
think according to Shagun rather than herself. She had even asked Raman that
what did he think she looked best in or which colour suited her best. Her
naughty husband had cheekily avoided her question by saying he preferred her
without them.
But today; she
blushed, one gesture and how everything had changed, all her insecurities, her
fear, her lack of confidence and her jealousness had paved way to love.
It was a regular
morning in Bhalla house; well as normal as it could be with Shagun being in the
house. Ruhi and Adi had left for their scool. Ishita had prepared breakfast for
everyone, packed their lunch and was now getting ready to leave for her clinic.
Her Amma had recently gifted her a beautiful kanjivaram to her which she had
specially bought for her from Chennai. She had very excitedly adorned it and
moved out of her room to get looks of appraisal from everyone in her home.
However, the one she wanted to impress was still inside the bathroom getting
ready for his office so she got busy in serving breakfast to everyone.
This is when Shagun
started one more time after she gave an upside down look to her and spoke to no
one in particular.
"You know my dadima
used to love the cream color. It suited her well. I somehow always recall old
aunties whenever I look cream color.", she smirked.
She did not need to
retort to her as the task was successfully taken up by Simmi and her mother in
law. No one could beat her outspoken loud Punjabi mother in law in retorts so Shagun was being molested with words as soon as the words were out of her mouth.
Yet, this was a gift
from her Amma and that's why it was special and she felt dejected at this
statement. All colour had positively drained out of Ishita's face after hearing
this.
So, she decided to
rush to her clinic and started completing the tasks for the day hurriedly. This
is when she felt his hand over her shoulder.
"Kya kar rahi ho? Aajkal
tum bilkul apna dhyan nahi deti. Kitni ajeeb lag rahi ho. Dhang se
tayyar bhi nahi hoti. Chalo mere saath.".
Raman took her hand in
his and took her towards the small idol of mata rani placed in one corner of
the kitchen while she looked at him quizzingly.
And then he took some
Teeka from near the idol, filled her parting with it and smiled,
"Ab theek hai. Now,
you look perfect."
He patted her cheek
affectionately and moved towards the dining table, to find the angered face of
Shagun, only to turn around and whispered in Ishita's ear; loud enough to be
heard by Shagun,
"Aur haan. Mujhe meri
beewi har rang me achi lagti hai jab tak uski maang me ye laal rang hai, kyunki
ye rang meri Ishita ka hai. Yaad rakhna, sirf Meri Ishita ka."
Red is the color of
her sindoor.
Red is the color of
her cheeks.
The colour of love is
red.
THE END
How was it 😳? Please let me know your thoughts.
Edited by btalwar - 9 years ago
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