Arjuna Uvacha ( Arjuna Speaks)
Numb with shock, I made my way to the lake and sat, pondering over the scolding I had just received. I could see Draupadi making her way to Yudhishthira and talking earnestly to him. It was easy to guess that I was the topic of their discussion. Perhaps she was asking the reason for his strange order. Yudhishthira, placing his hand on her shoulder was trying to reassure her.
Obviously not satisfied with his explanation, Draupadi got up abruptly and began walking back. I caught her eye - which on seeing me, began filling with tears- and gave her an encouraging smile. C'mon Krishnaa, I told her mentally, your husband has been trained by Guru Dronacharya. He can take a battering, he wont collapse so easily.
But it was easier said than done. I was deeply stung by brother's taunt about not having a strong will and losing to Nakula after only one round.
It was almost evening- the usual time for our daily wrestling bouts, but when I approched our huts, instead of the usual camaradrie, there was only silence. Only brother Bhima's grunts could be heard as he swung a huge mace above his head. Surprisingly brother Yudhishthira was also there. Very well, I thought, I will show him Drona shishya Arjuna's will power.
I went up to Nakula and siezing him roughly threw him on the ground. Nakula stumbled but accepting my challenge charged at me. Soon our bodies were locked as we wrestled with each other. I could sense that Nakula was restraining his strength and was not fighing with full force. Even then it did not take long for him to floor me and while I was able to get on to my feet, I knew I would not be able to sustain beyond a few more minutes.
Despite the whole family encouraging me, I could not last beyond a few bouts and rather tamely surrendered the fight. Out of the corner of my eye I could see brother Yudhishthira shaking his head and walking away.
I had let him down again.
The evening meal again was not a pleasant affair. I knew my brother was watching me closely, so I tried not to think of food even when I was serving it. But with a stomach that was empty for the last three days and a battered, punched body, it was difficult not to think about myself.
The next two days passed in a similar manner, except that brother Yudhishthira kept assigning me more and more tasks. He asked me to go along with our attendants when they went into the forest to collect firewood. Then I was asked to tend the horses.
It was not easy obeying brother's orders to the letter as my body mind and spirit weakened but I persisted. But by now my stomach was growling constantly, my head had begun to ache, despite Draupadi's kind ministrations and worst of all, I could no longer control my temper. Brother Yudhishthira's order on not thinking about food only made me think of food all the time.
My collapse was not far off.
Edited by varaali - 10 years ago
