INDIA TV reveals-Balaji, Ashwin, Pujara FIXED TOO!

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INDIA TV is the channel....

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-Cruiser- thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#1

Pretty stressful day at the office, Country Sales lagging behind the projections...reach home thinking will make some Cauliflower as a delicious side dish to Rice n Rajma and suddenly realise I had used the last few drops of the last Sunflower oil bottle yesterday, had forgotten to buy oil as I drove home today and on top, no butter in fridge as well.🤢😡

Just as a bit of nerve starts taking control, Cruiser deep breathes, says to himself,"Calm Down, Calm Down..." and tries his tried and tested formula of always getting a hearty laugh!👍🏼

YESSS...cruiser switches on his Isko Laga Daala, Toh Life Zhinga Lala, TATA SKY PLUS and straight away dives to great Comedy channel, INDIA TV!...(For whatever reason they insist on being called a News Channel)😲...and there it goes...


**Those of you who are INDIA TV Victims, know well how it's announcements are made and how they manage to keep you on tenterhooks for hours together! For those who have never watched INDIA TV...you just don't know what you are missing in life! 😭😕


INDIA TV SCREAMS AS IT COMES ALIVE ON MY BIG PLASMA SCREEN:

BREAKING NEWS...😲


""Aaj Shaam 6.02 Baje. Dekhiye Kaise Kiya Balaji ne match fix! Ji haan. Balaji ne kiya hai Match Fix. Bahut Bada Match Fix Kiya Hai Bala Ji ne. Laxmipathy BalaJi nikle Match Fixer!🤓...

...Laxmipathy BalaJi jinhein diya poore desh ne pyaar. Balaji jinhone antar-rashtriya star ki cricket kheli hai Bharat ke liye, Taminadu ke liye, aur ab IPL mein khel rahe hain Kolkata Knight Riders ke liye. Jaane mane khilaadi hain Laxmipathy Balaji jinhone kiya apna Match fix!...

...Sirf Balaji hi naheen! Match kiya fix Cheteshwar Pujara ne bhi. 🤓🤓...Match fix kiya Ravichandran Ashwin ne bhi. INDIA TV pe dhamaakedaar BREAKING NEWS! 🤓🤓 🤓🤓

INDIA TV karega pardafaash! Sirf INDIA TV par hogi ye Breaking News, aaj sham 06.02 Minute par.

Lekin philhaal jaari rahega ye special programme. Ji haan. Aap Dekh Rahe hain,

UFO ne aasmaan mein kheench li gaay! 🤓🤓 🤓🤓



Ji haan, ye khauffnaak haadsa hua Mexico ke ek gaanv mein jahaan Eduardo naam ka kisaan apni gaay ghaas charaane laaya thha ek paahadi ghaati ki taraf...

...Eduardo ne pee li ek bottle sharaab, aankh lagi hi thhi ki dekhi bhayaanak, aankhon ko chaka-chaundh kar dene waali Roshni.⭐️...

...Eduardo ne dekha Aliens ka vimaan. 😲...

...Ji haan Vimaan dekha Mexico ke ek gareeb kisaan ne. 🤓

...Dharti ka naheen, kisi anya Griha se aaya thha ye Vimaan!😕 Vimaan se nikle thhe aliens. 😕😕...

...Aliens jinhein chaahiye thhi Eduardo ki gaay! 😈...

...Ji haan aliens hain Gaay chor.😈 Chura le jaate hain maasoom Gaay. 😈

-------------------------------------------------

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OK, Cruiser got tired of INDIA TV and went for a game of Tennis and a swim. (and for a couple of bottles of sunflower oil, a slab of butter and some Orange juice as well...)⭐️

Came back three hours later, God knows what happened to UFO's aliens or rather to poor Eduardo's poorer Cow. 🤔

Thank God, I missed the long suspense they must have created on Match Fixing by Balaji, Pujara and Ashwin, because they must have tortured the viewers and callers enough and were actually revealing the Fixing details👏👏:

...INDIA TV bataana chaahta hai ki Balaji ne kiya hai apna Match fix, ramp model Priya Thakur ke saath!...

...Ji haan, Bala Ji ne kar li hai Sagaayi. Balaji ki ho gayi hai Engagement. Balaji Ka MATCH FIX!...

Dekhiye Balaji ki daanton ki chamak...kaise khushi se chamchama rahe hain Balaji ke daant...🤣




...Chetshwar Pujara ne kar li hai Shaadi. Unka bhi ho gaya MATCH FIX! Cheteshwar Pujara ko catch kiya hai Puja ne! Pujara ban gaye hain Pooja Ke Pujari!👏...Dekhiye ye tasveerein...


Pujara ki ho gayi Pooja safal. Pujara kar rahe hain Puja ki Pooja! Pujara ka bhi MATCH FIX!👏👏



Carrom Chandran Ashwin ka bhi Carrom khelna hua band! Carrom Chandran ko stump kiya Preethi ne. Preethi ne li Ashwin ki wicket aur Ashwin ka bhi go gaya Match FIX! 👍🏼




Ahhh...what would I have done but for my Stress buster...the one and only INDIA TV! 😲


But for it I would have been brooding over the sagging sales figures of my Business operations..., cursing myself for eating plain Rajma-Rice just because I forgot to bring home the Sunflower oil and butter as I drove home...and would have lazed around thinking stuff all negative!

I went down cheerful, brough oil, juice and butter, made some nice Gobhi ki sabzi 😛 as well and had a dinner sporting an ear to ear grin!😆😛😊

THANK YOU INDIA TV...adore you!🤗🥳

********************************

If you like above kind of crap, you might as well check out these crappier fun threads in Bolly section:😛

1. The Real Dirty Pictures- Tere Waaste Maine-

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3118195/the-real-hungry-pictures-tere-waaste-maine

2. Chummi Hashmi, Khujli Bhatt, Funny Leone & Turkey!

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3098943/chummi-hashmi-khujli-bhatt-funny-leone-and-turkey

3. Himesh Reshammiya & Lata Mangeshkar

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3213899/himesh-reshammiya-and-lata-mangeshkar

4. Koffee with Karan-Asin Thottu-KAMAAL & KAMAAL

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3100365/koffee-with-karan-asin-thottu-kamaal-and-kamaal

5. BARFI---So much like real life--Fun take on BARFI

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3229516/barfi-so-much-like-real-life-fun-take-on-barfi

6. Tum Sabke Naam--Hum Ne Kiya Hai---Jeevan Apna---

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3095107/tum-sabke-naam-hum-ne-kiya-hai-jeevan-apna

7. A Bollywood Party-Inside story!

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3091663/a-bollywood-party-inside-story

8. Gangs of Bollywood Khans-O SALMANIYA-HO SALMANIYA

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3142944/gangs-of-bollywood-khans-o-salmaniya-ho-salmaniya

9. Gangs of Bollywood Khans- I am SRK & Whole World--

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3218753/gangs-of-bollywood-khans-i-am-srk-and-whole-world

10. Tujh mein BUTT Dikhta hai-Yara Main Kya Karoon? :(

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3097357/tujh-mein-butt-dikhta-hai-yara-main-kya-karoon

11. Bhojpuri Re-makes of Holly-Bolly Films!

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3093744/bhojpuri-re-makes-of-holly-bolly-films

12. Mat Gira Re...Zameen Par...(18+ Please)

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/bollywood/3090264/mat-gira-re-zameen-par-18-please

Edited by -Cruiser- - 12 years ago

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neha-rockss thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#2
grrr

Read all of it NOW 🥱😆


Cruiser title se zarorr shock de diya aapne 😆😆


I agree on India TV being such an entertaining channel...we all keep discussing abt it on the usual thread...How on earth can they have Veena Horny Mallik as a cricket expert 🤣

Inka sansanikhez khulaasa itna jyaada sansanikhez hota hai ki most of the times they misguide you and a few times dont make sense 😆

Lekin Hasna hoto India TV zarur dekho 😳😆


Good post ...felt like @India TV home 😆


Ans- Yes its the BESTEST (if the word exists) Comedy channel ever 😆
Edited by neha-rockss - 12 years ago
-GayabCat- thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#3
Havent watched tv
But OMG did they really do that 😲
Kya zamana agaya hai *yawns*
BullsEye777 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#4
You are kidding, right? If not, what kind of news channel is that...
MyDarkPassenger thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#5
Obviously it was very funny... I love that line of yours 'Isko laga daala to life jinga lala' 🤣 🤣 Tata Sky 😆
and seriously India TV is very hilarious... there headlines will literally make you roll on the floor laughing 🤣
Great work! 👍🏼

Edited by ..Ashraa.. - 12 years ago
-Cruiser- thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#6

Originally posted by: BullsEye777

You are kidding, right? If not, what kind of news channel is that...



Read their various headlines..in this Vid..😆

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WaGcejxlfVo[/YOUTUBE]

-Cruiser- thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#7
INDIA TV indulging in Emotional Atyaachaar...😕


News story on plight of Kabootars😭 when Ajmal Kasab and group butchered innocents in Mumbai...


[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P3iYpt8-PGE[/YOUTUBE]
BullsEye777 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#8

Originally posted by: -Cruiser-



Read their various headlines..in this Vid..😆

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WaGcejxlfVo[/YOUTUBE]



🤣 I guess their screaming headlines did not do the trick and so they decided to make up stories. Are aliens drinking cow's milk😆
Billu-Maamma thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#9
Hahaha match fixing.superb post. India tv rocks.crusier shocks.rofl
SSB28 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#10
I first thought that you are kidding 🤔

Then I actually searched for it and there it was and I was like 😲 😲 😲

And it is supposed to be a news channel😲 😲 😲

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