I would appreciate all the comments and help I can get in order to continue with this story. Either PM me or leave a comment. I'm open to ALL suggestions and critique. Please keep in mind that I have never written anything along these lines and have no experience whatsoever.
AN AWAKENING
Chapter 1:
"I don't love Rani Saahiba, it's always been you I have loved and it will continue to be you. I won't rest until the day you are fully mine, in all ways possible."
"Chi!! The nerve of you to speak such besharam words to me. I pity Anjaliji for marrying a monster like you. Yes, that's what I think you are, a monster. To behave like a doting husband on one end, and on another hand, to creep behind single girls. You should be punished. Unfortunately, I can't break Anjaliji's heart by telling her the truth. However, if you EVER try to contact me again or speak to me in such a manner, I will not hesitate to shout to the whole world about your true self, and there will be nothing you can do to stop me. You see, Jiju loves Payal and he will never leave her. And there is nothing else that you can ruin for me or for my family. Therefore, you can keep giving me empty threats because I don't give a damn. I will tell Anjaliji about her cheater of a husband, will ruin your reputation as the perfect damad in front of Naniji, and most of all, I will tell Arnavji, who will kick you out of this house in two minutes without even thinking about it."
"Hah! You think your Arnavji will ever listen to your words against mine. I don't think so. He hates you, he hates you with such a passion that he wouldn't even believe you if you said the sky is blue. Just remember, you have already tarnished your reputation in Lakshmi Nagar by having a broken engagement and you very well know you can't go back to Lucknow because of the video footage from the fashion show. Now your only option is to keep your mouth shut, and do as I say in the future. I will leave you now so you can enjoy your Jiji's wedding, but mark my words, you will be mine!" With that statement, Shyam left the terrace, leaving a dejected and heartbroken Khushi clutching on to her dupatta.
Khushi replayed Shyam's words over and over in her head. No matter, how disgusting of a man he was, he was intelligent and some of his statements rang true. He was correct; her reputation was ruined in Lucknow. There was no way she and her family could go back there. The video from the fashion show of her in Arnav's arms was still shown on local news stations. After all, when a small town girl falls into the arms of a supposed modern day prince charming, it's definitely news worthy. She also realized that in Lakshmi Nagar, people were still gossiping about her engagement and the subsequent break up. No one really knew the details as the Guptas tried not to share all their secrets. After all, how would they explain to curious neighbors that their daughter's ex-fiance is the happily married damadji of their other daughters new sasural. This would lead to more rumors and speculations!
Even though these remarks were disturbing Khushi, the words that struck her the most true, and hit the deepest, were Shyam's words about Arnav's hatred towards her. He was right! The man hated her with a passion, for reasons she never understood. He despised her status and her lack of wealth, education, upbringing, etc. He never failed to mention it. In the back of her mind though, a small voice rung out, if he really hated those things, why would he allow his only brother to marry a girl from the same family, from the same upbringing. Realization struck: he didn't hate her because of her status or family, he just hated her, for reasons unbeknownst to her. Tears welled out as emotions of the day were getting to be too much for her. The day started off so promising, with Arnavji helping her out serving their guests, and then helping her select a sari, and later welcoming her into his home with such a lovely smile. Why would he do those things for someone he despises. He even wanted to have a talk with her earlier. What could he possibly say to her? Ugh, why does this have to be so complicated?
Arnav was walking to the terrace replaying the days activities in his head. It started with him going to Khushi's house and being mesmerized by the sight in front of him. He then removed his pride and ego for the morning and acted as a waiter! For what though? Just to help out his brother's in-laws or was there something more to it? What had gotten into him to act like that? If those actions weren't confusing enough, he then tried to slyly choose Khushi's sari. What difference did it really make to him what sari she chose? All these thoughts were whirling around in his head, and then the conversation he had with Akash while getting the groom get ready for his big day got him thinking more. The way Akash described his love towards Payal automatically made him think of Khushi. Images of her flashed in his head throughout the whole talk. If that wasn't enough, his Di's frantic speech about opening up to the one he loves after her near fatal accident was something else that made him ponder life and love. What he really in love? And that too, with Khushi?
Arnav could admit that there was an attraction towards Kushi. He felt it from the moment he saw the angel in green descending down the cat walk at Sheesh Mahal. There was also a magnetic pull he felt towards her, but was it actually love? To someone as sinister as Arnav Singh Raizada, there was no way he could be in love, as it was something in which he didn't believe. Talks about love and emotions were for those who were weak and didn't live in a practical world. He didn't belong in that category whatsoever. His own thoughts and actions were beginning to confuse him, and to top it all off, he had expressed to Khushi that he wanted to talk to her. He was his usual vague self when she demanded an explanation as to why, but it wasn't because he wanted to keep the topic a secret, he just didn't know what he wanted to say to her!
Giving presentations at Harvard and delivering speeches to
honorable dignitaries was less daunting than the prospect of having this talk
with Kushi Kumari Gupta! Those audiences were predictable, this one definitely
was not. And the worst part was, the great ASR had no idea what he wanted to say,
or even why he wanted to talk in the first place.
The sight that greeted him at the entrance of the terrace made his breath stop. There she was, in her orange churidar suit, hugging her knees and bawling her eyes out. What the? He had just seen her merrily walk up the stairs to the terrace a few minutes ago. What happened between that time and now?
Running to her as fast as he could, he gathered her to a standing position and shook her shoulders. "Khushi, what's wrong, tell me dammit! Did you hurt yourself, let me see, do you need me to call a doctor? Is it a bruise or a cut, do you need a bandage? KHUSHI! Look at me while I'm talking to you." She was still not able to meet his eyes as she was so lost in her own thoughts. Still trying to shake her and simultaneously checking out to see where she was hurt, he started to get nervous. "Khushi, did something happen to you? Did someone say something to you? Did they hurt you? Why aren't you answering me Khushi Kumari Gupta? Just please tell me what's happening."
"Why does it make a difference to you if I'm hurt physically, or if someone hurt me emotionally? Why would it affect you anyways," called out a meek voice.
"It makes a difference dammit, " he started yelling.
"WHY? Just tell me why it makes a difference to you? I'm the girl you hate, the middle class girl who entered your world only to create problems in your life. Because of me, your relationship with Lavanyaji started to strain and you two eventually broke up. I'm the same person who ruined your fashion show, caused sprinklers to erupt at your office, put orange juice in your shoes, drained the petrol out of your car making you miss your conference. What have I not done to ruin your life," Khushi started off, barely able to keep the words coming out coherent in between her sobs.
"Khushi, just stop it."
"Why should I stop it? It's true. I mean you have repeatedly told me to stay within my limits and have reminded me of my aukaat in society. It's true, I'm nothing, especially against you, the great Arnav Singh Raizada."
"I didn't mean...'"
Cutting off his words, she started, "It's ok, whatever you said was completely true. I have no standing in society. I'm a nobody. I'm an orphan girl who was kindly taken in by her mausi out of pity and I still manage to embarrass them with all my antics. Now I just need to repay them for all their kindness. I need to start over. During Jiji's wedding festivities, I let go of reality and started believing in a dream world. But it's over now, I have no more dreams for myself. All I need to think about is supporting the family that has given me everything since I was eight years old. I need to find a job, get better treatment for Bauji so he can start walking and talking again, and most of all, I need to stay away from ALL trouble so not to embarrass Amma and Buaji. They need to be able to roam around Lakshmi Nagar freely without having to hear taunts about the orphan girl they took in. That's it, starting tomorrow, I will cut myself from everything and be the perfect daughter. I will spend my life working for them, and stop living for myself."
Still taken aback from her monologue, Arnav asked, "Khushi, what's gotten into you. Why are you talking all this nonsense. This is a day to celebrate our siblings union and them becoming one in holy matrimony. Why are you so down? What happened, you can tell me anything."
Fresh sobs broke out again and she started mumbling, "How can I share anything with you? After all, you hate me, everyone knows it, even he...'"
"KHUSHI! I don't hate you. I just and who's 'he,' what are you trying to say? What's gotten into you?" Arnav mentally slapped himself for letting her feel this down and out, while trying to keep out the jealousy in his voice at the mention of another male and Khushi in the same sentence.
"Arnavji, it's ok. Starting tomorrow, you won't have to deal with me ever again. I promise, I won't be coming here anymore. I will respect that this is Jiji's sasural and I need to keep my boundaries straight. I won't even show my face to you. I will strictly stick to talking to Jiji on the phone and will insist that she come visit home instead of me coming over. This will all work. If everything goes this way, you will have all your dreams come true and never have to see my face ever again."
"STOP. Just stop it!" He couldn't handle the words that just came out of her mouth. The thought of not being able to see or talk to Khushi struck him hard. What would life be without his daily interactions with Khushi? This was something he didn't even want to think about.
"Khushi, I told you earlier that I want to talk to you, so let me talk now and you listen. Don't start your nonsense now and just hear me out. Understand?"
As she started nodding her head slowly, he began, "Khushi, I just want to say'."
Let me know how it is and if I should continue or not. Again, I'm open to all comment and suggestions. I just really want to contribute to this forum and keep Arshi alive in some way!
Index:
Chapter 1: Above
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