Difference between love and friendship?

We have been discussing Ashutosh's love for Nidhi and his friendship with Mallika. We have tried to understand how the two are different from each other.

What was it that made Ashutosh value and trust Mallika above all others, even his own self, but adamantly refuse to marry her?

What was it that made Ashutosh lack faith in Nidhi's integrity and basic character and yet rush into marriage with her?

Was it sheer chemistry? Because, as my wise daughter pointed out to me, chemistry cannot be one-sided whereas emotions can. Chemistry imples reaction and so it is simply not possible for it to be one-sided. Please note, I am talking of chemistry and not lust. Emotions however can develop purely on one side, since there is ample scope for misinterpreting words and actions.

If chemistry is indeed at the basis of love while trust is at the basis of friendship, then is it a better idea to marry for friendship then for love? After all, with the passage of years, chemsitry may fade. Trust,on the other hand, normally only grows with time.

Would Ashutosh have been better off with Mallika and Nidhi with Rohan if this is the case?

Please do share your thoughts!

Ashutosh is lucky to have Nidhi as his wife. She is much more caring and understanding towards him. She respects him and also trust him. She keeps no ego when it comes to losing him. Bus she doesnt get this back from Ashutosh which she could have from Rohan as he cant see tears in her eyes.
Ashutosh is very good to Nidhi as long as Malika is out of his life but if he is given option to select he always opts Mallus opinion. He was so considerate from engagement to honeymoon period. But then very next day he was so rude to her for not getting up early and making tea. He takes Nidhi for granted which is not good in any relationship.
Malika is very dominating and shrewd woman .So dont think right match for sensitive person like Ashu.
Rohan Nidhi could be perfect match if Rohan was serious about his career Even his parents would have loved Nidhi more than her ungreateful Nanaji.

Just for the sake of argument...

what if he had a brotherly love towards her... and as usual he expected Mallika to understand that feeling...

>> A brother puts up with all crack pot mental stuff with his sister.

>> A brother never finds a mistake with his younger sister.

>> Even if some times he finds also, laugh it loud saying..'bachpana'... and leaves there.

>> A brother always believes his sister whom he knows from her birth, more than his wife.

>> A brother never will never have any 'other' kind of feeling towards his sister...


Ashutosh felt a boy-friend type of love for Nidhi...

>> Enjoyed thoroughly a girl's attention towards him.

>> Encouraged by her affection, he aspires for physical nearness too..

>> Due to relationship of this nature, he expected her to be at par with him emotionally...

>> because of that, he gets angry quite often or whenever she fails to act as expected...

>> But still he loves her as husband and desires...


* Mudra running away even without shoes *

Originally posted by: mudraswathi

Just for the sake of argument...

what if he had a brotherly love towards her... and as usual he expected Mallika to understand that feeling...

>> A brother puts up with all crack pot mental stuff with his sister.

>> A brother never finds a mistake with his younger sister.

>> Even if some times he finds also, laugh it loud saying..'bachpana'... and leaves there.

>> A brother always believes his sister whom he knows from her birth, more than his wife.

>> A brother never will never have any 'other' kind of feeling towards his sister...


Ashutosh felt a boy-friend type of love for Nidhi...

>> Enjoyed thoroughly a girl's attention towards him.

>> Encouraged by her affection, he aspires for physical nearness too..

>> Due to relationship of this nature, he expected her to be at par with him emotionally...

>> because of that, he gets angry quite often or whenever she fails to act as expected...

>> But still he loves her as husband and desires...


* Mudra running away even without shoes *

Mudra, you don't have to run too far...this is pretty much what another show on Star Plus is addressing...a man torn between his love, trust and commitment to his sister and his feelings for his wife...am told it is doing a decent job of it even!

Originally posted by: Sujatha.rao

Mudra, you don't have to run too far...this is pretty much what another show on Star Plus is addressing...a man torn between his love, trust and commitment to his sister and his feelings for his wife...am told it is doing a decent job of it even!

Rahenedo... one KTLK is more than enough for my beloved life... I cannot experiment with any.😳

good post sujatha
honestly, neither have i understood this love between ashu and nidhi nor this so called friendship between ashu and mallu...

talking about love, agree that u dont need a reason to fall in love, it just happens, blah blah..but after they fell in love, what did they do to know each other better, build on the trust factor etc... they were busy discussing noodle/pasta/coffee, disco/violin and hair dye (worst epi.) and it was the writer's matured way of showing age gap... so that is why it now appears that ashu doesnt trust or know nidhi at all..

talking about friendship... i dont know what kind of friendship is this?... right from the nidhi firing of kotnis episode...mallika has clearly mentioned that 'main nidhi se nafrat karti hoon kyunki tum usse pyaar karte ho'..and kept on repeating it to ashu.. but all ashu did was grin like an idiot
as normal human beings, will we not distance our self with such a friend..but ashu kept clinging on to her, when he knew that she hates nidhi... for what joy? just in the name of friendship or whatever was left of it?

From Kpji angle:
Friendship is more than 100% trust and love is more than 100% distrust.
Normal point of view we all know I don't think that is needed to be discussed .

Originally posted by: Niks_uae

good post sujatha
honestly, neither have i understood this love between ashu and nidhi nor this so called friendship between ashu and mallu...

talking about love, agree that u dont need a reason to fall in love, it just happens, blah blah..but after they fell in love, what did they do to know each other better, build on the trust factor etc... they were busy discussing noodle/pasta/coffee, disco/violin and hair dye (worst epi.) and it was the writer's matured way of showing age gap... so that is why it now appears that ashu doesnt trust or know nidhi at all..

talking about friendship... i dont know what kind of friendship is this?... right from the nidhi firing of kotnis episode...mallika has clearly mentioned that 'main nidhi se nafrat karti hoon kyunki tum usse pyaar karte ho'..and kept on repeating it to ashu.. but all ashu did was grin like an idiot
as normal human beings, will we not distance our self with such a friend..but ashu kept clinging on to her, when he knew that she hates nidhi... for what joy? just in the name of friendship or whatever was left of it?

Very true...even while he had evidence of Mallika's hatred for Nidhi and she herself confessed to it, he still did not believe that she could harm her...

WHile Nidhi had found Mallika for him, accepted her into their home and even cared for her, he still chose to believe that Nidhi would harm Mallika going purely by circumstantial evidence!

Woh kehte hain na, dhobhi ka kutta na ghar ka na ghat ka...I think Ashutosh is pretty much there!

@Suja...but you know what they say, men like the hunt/ chase more than the actual result...so while there was a hint of insecurity vis a vis their relationship, he treated Nidhi like a princess...but now that he has got her, he has started taking her for granted!