Chapter 2: …. to the Reception
She was so incredibly tall, he thought, as he watched her stand next to his mother and cousins, her one leg bent a little, an unconscious habit that she developed when she shot up like a pole when she turned thirteen to make up for the height difference between her and most girls… and boys. But rather than making her look awkward, it made her look like the statues of those Greek goddesses who were always luring men to their demise, not that he would ever tell her that. In fact, he would never admit to her how he thought God had wasted such feminine beauty on such an unaware woman… from her light brown eyes that were a bit tilted up at the end, her slender nose, her slightly overfull lips, and her slim neck to her willowy body with the longest legs he had ever seen on a woman. What the hell was the use of it all when it was attached a brain that worked faster than ten men combined, and a luscious mouth that spewed out only the most factual and logical of matters – or alternatively, venom, when she deigned to speak to him – and eyes that were either hiding behind reading glasses when she read, which was about 99% of her waking existence – or alternatively, flashing fire, when she deigned to turn her gaze on him – all of which rendered her essentially useless as a female. She was the walking definition of an oxymoron, the daughter of Medusa who looked like Venus. He hated her. And he intended to make her suffer for getting him chained to her for life.
"Congratulations, Shiv" he heard and turned to the side to find Druv's gleeful face, the jackass who was supposed to be his best friend.
"Congratulations, my ass, you jerk!"
"Well, matrimony is always best when it sneaks up on you unaware." Druv said with a grin.
"You know what else is best when it sneaks up on you unaware?" Shiv started belligerently and Druv interrupted him to say, "Alright, alright, I am sure your idea would involve grievous harm to some manly part of me, so I will pass." He looked over to where Gauri was standing talking to one of her friends now and said, "You have to admit, there is some poetic justice to you ending up with her. I mean, of all the women in the world, of aaall the women in the whole wideUniverse!" Druv said emphatically and Shiv thought of punching him really hard.
"Not another word, you sorry excuse for a friend!" he said and Druv laughed out loud.
"Words, I have aplenty of, my friend. Aplenty…"
"Yes, you and Gauri both. You should have married her!" Shiv said now, looking over at Gauri.
Druv pretended to consider that for a few seconds and then said, "Nah… I actually like the girl. What would be the fun in being forced to marry someone you actually like? It's way more fun watching you tie the proverbial marital noose around your neck… I am going to enjoy watching this version of Taming of the Shrew."
"I am going to go for a little less of the Bard and a bit more popular fiction and say that it's going to be like "Interview with the Vampire." Shiv said.
Druv gave an amused laugh as he added, "A very pretty Vampire she is, then."
"Since when have you been lusting after her?" Shiv turned around to ask Druv in surprise when he heard his tone.
"Oh come on man! It's no lust. She is a beautiful woman and I am a red-blooded man. It's just an aesthetic exercise."
"There is nothing remotely aesthetic about that woman, Druv. Absolutely nothing." Shiv said, but then wondered if he had been too vehement in his denial because Druv looked at him closely to say, "Now, don't lie to yourself. You are going to bite your tongue and eat your words when you have to share a room and a bed with her."
"Haven't you heard? Familiarity breeds contempt." Shiv countered easily.
"Yea, but first you have to get familiar."
"Not if I can help it." Shiv said.
"You can't, Shiv." Druv said, needing to have the last word.
"Whose side are you on anyways, huh?" Shiv asked now, getting annoyed. "I just got married, in case it escaped your notice! Married! Me! And that, to the bane of my existence! To the female equivalent of the Andromeda Strain!"
"I am on your side yaar! Don't worry. Just trying to lighten your mood is all… It's not every day that a man wakes up to find himself rather rudely taken off the market." Druv said with a bit more seriousness now.
"I have no intention of being off the market, Druv." Shiv answered, looking around the room at the milling guests, half of whom he didn't know because they were her colleagues or people who knew both her and her ex-fiance. Most of his friends were not even at his wedding. When he thought about it, it was really incredible. Almost like the whole thing didn't even happen.
"You are planning on being unfaithful to her?" Druv asked now.
"How can I be unfaithful when we don't have a relationship to be faithful to?" Shiv said, finally looking at Druv.
"So, what is this going to be? Like an open marriage?"
"What? You thought just because my father forced me into this, that I would suddenly develop an acute sense of morality and play the doting husband? What a clich, Druv. That only happens in chick-flicks and trashy romances." Shiv replied in derision.
"Yes, and an open marriage is really the prevailing norm!" Druv returned the sarcasm.
"There is nothing normal about this marriage, Druv. So, there will be nothing normal about my relationship with her either. And I can assure you, that woman will be only too happy to hear it. In case you haven't noticed, she hates my guts, has hated it since she was five and I was seven!"
"That was 23 years ago Shiv!"
"Exactly my point Druv! It has been 23 years in the making. Such long feuds die hard!"
"With a Vengeance" Druv added and Shiv looked at him in agitation.
"Alright, alright.. I'll stop." Druv said, now grinning again, before looking at him to whisper, "Don't look now, but they're headed over here."
"Who?" Shiv asked.
"Who else? Your accidental wife and her new in-laws…"
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