TS THE FOUR PART 6A : BEHIND ENEMY LINES BEGINNING PG 35 22/05

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deejagi

@deejagi

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#211

Hi Shivam,

Sorry for late response but I read the same immediately. But could not post as I had some network issues to post from Computer and through phone I could not do anything (not even like the post) and now also I can't write more here but the OS was worth the wait. It was mind blowing and I was imagining the aftermath of banishment of the crooked four from the Ayodhya palace. Don't you think king Dasharth under estimated their power? Now that he has given a clean chit for them to spoil the whole lot of kids of Ayodhya 😆😆😆😆😆 Who knows? you may turn them good and responsible foursome in your next part...

Anyways, if possible will write more review later. If not please pardon me

btw, why it is rishivar? Sorry fro asking so late

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Anu

@SenAnu

Dazzler

Posted: 9 years ago

#212

OMG thanks so much for such lovely comical updates!!! Din ban jata hain... And even the sudden English in between adds to the humour... Awesome!!

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Shivam...

@Shivam...

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#213

Originally posted by: trina134
By the way, Shivam I have a suggestion for the next part if you would like that.
I would like if you write on it.
Why dont you show Kirti and the others making a team and teaching a lesson to the twins by playing a prank on them ?

Thanks Trina for liking the drabble and giving your suggestions for next

Surely I will take those in mind while writing next one .

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Shivam...

@Shivam...

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#214

Originally posted by: twinks1283
👏Brilliant luved both teams especially the naughty team of twins:)
Could tottaly imagine all of them

Thank you Dear

Edited by Shivam... - 9 years ago

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nissi or jesi

@Jess_Ru

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#215

Oh my read it thrice phir bhi 🤣 ...shivam ur one of d best re...hatts off man...I was literally imagining these things when seeing skr

Sab ka kryptonite sita dear ke pravachan 🤣

Write more thanks for pm...jho bhi u write pm bejo

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Shivam...

@Shivam...

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#216

Originally posted by: shruthiravi
It took me quite some time to read it. But it was fantastic. I enjoyed it thoroughly. 👏👏👏

Thanks shruti

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Srutha

@SriMaatangi

Sparkler

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#217

Originally posted by: deejagi

btw, why it is rishivar? Sorry fro asking so late

I will answer it :P

He is Maharishi Valmiki.

You see, in our Lakshman AT, we each play a character. Shivam Bhaiya is Rishivar :P

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Shivam...

@Shivam...

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#218

Originally posted by: Rex_Ryan
awesome update rishivar!!!!!worth waiting ...loved suthkirti and sathrugan portrayal ...racing scene mothers running behind mandavi and urmila and coming 3&4 ...special couple urmila's pony and saryu ... and last the counseling part ...team shatru and their crazy ideas was superb !!!!! (they were true winners)
p.s. this certifies I am crazy

Glad you Liked it Ryan

I hope you are not dissapointed with Shrutkirti's portryal in this part. Based on your feedback , I did some changes to the original plot.

that drunk role was originally meant for lakshmana , but to incorporate shrutkirti's boldness , shatrughan took that part😆😆

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Shivam...

@Shivam...

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#219

Originally posted by: Aayushi15
Oh my god. Your posts are always so hilarious and at the same time outstanding.
I loved it. Shatrughan's drunk avatar was adorable and all the competitions were great too.
And the last line was epic, " jeete toh hum hi hai " .

Thanks Ayushi

THat Last Line , I just wrote it casually , wasnt finding anything good to how to end it .