Preeto ... our own storyline :)

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Aqeelah

@xxAqeelahxx

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#11

PART 2

...Rajbeer and preeto look into each others eyes ... (song plays- teri ore)

Everyone is busy walking here and there... simran and her mom are together
with dhruv and ishu ... and they are happy together...

Beeji comes

Beeji- Namaste Neelam penji ... bauth acha laga ke ap aiye...

NA- No problem Kaval ji ... waise i must say ghar apne acha sajaya...
chota sa ghar he aur guests bhi kaam hain na

Beeji just looks at NA... and simran butts in

Simran- erm ... beeji rajbeer kahan hain??

Beeji- hah yahan kahi hi hoga...

Simran- Mom i'll just come yeah ...

Simran looks around but can't see rajbeer anywhere ... then she notices him behind the staircase ...

Simran just stares at both of them feeling hurt... she feels jealous the way rajbeers holding preeto's arm pulling her towards him ...

On the other hand preeto feeling uncomfortable because some one might see them and it'll be humilating..

Simran tears came out of her eyes ... she could not bear to see them 2 like this...
Neelam aunty was worried that her daughter could not be seen ... she was looking everywhere and spotted her standing alone ... she approached towards her
and saw her crying ... she tried to talk to her but she was just staring at something ... Neelam aunty looked and saw Rajbeer and Preeto together ... and they were so close to each other...
she was frustrated ... she had enough... even though she told preeto to stay away from rajbeer she didn't listen ... this is the limit she thought ...

Neelam aunty couldn't take it that her daughter was crying ...

NA- PREETOOO she shouted at the top of her voice... everyone stopped talking and looked towards Neelam aunty... they were confused...Rajbeer and preeto looked at NA

NA- You swine preeto !!!... chup chup kar ke mill re ho... bar aao sab ke saamne...

Rajbeer came out holding preeto's hand... everyone just stood staring at them
dolly aunty , beeji , papa ji and preeto sisters looked at rajbeer holding preeto's hand ...

Simran also stood staring at them shocked to her mother shout... preeto made rajbeer let go of her hand embarrased...

NA- yeh sikaye tumne apni beti ko kaval ji ??? besharmi ki bhi haad hoti hain ... its so disgusting ...

Beeji was upset ... by NA act...

Beeji- Neelam behnji apko koi galat feh...

NA- JUST SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! koi kuch nahin bhole ga ...maine jo dekhna dekhli
aur tum preeto ... what the hell were you bloody doing ...

Preeto- N...eelam a..un..ty main woh

NA- Save it preeto ... mujhe koi safai nahin chaiye ... i have had enough... tum jaise ko mein bauth achi tara jaanti hoon ...ladke ko pasaane pai tumhari aadat jo hain ... heh na beta???
... you'll pay for it preeto
meri beti ki khushiya chiin ke tumne teek nahin kiya...

Neelam aunty hold her daughter...

Preeto- Simran ki khushiyaan chiin li????kya matlab ...

Simran- Mom please ... stop it

NA- Nahin simran ... haan preeto meri beti simran rajbeer se pyaar karti hain ... tumse kahin pehle ... uski bachpan ki dost hain for gods sake ...
bauth acha rishta ta aur phir tum beech main agayi ... tumne rajbeer ko chin liya ...

Rajbeer got shocked

Rajbeer ... WHAT!!!! Simran tum mujhe se pyaar karti hoon ... par hum aur meain ache dost hain ... maine tumhare baare main aisa nahin socha ...

Simran- Paar maine socha... main tumse pyaar karti hoon ... par pehle relaise nahin kiya ...tumhe kaise pata chalta ... tumne kabhi notice hi nahin kiya ...

NA- thats it preeto ... enough is enough

Neelam aunty came towards preeto and put her hand across to slap preeto...
Rajbeer grabbed Neelam aunty's hand ...

Neelam aunty was popping her eyes out at rajbeer ... and simran was shocked to at rajbeers behaviour... everyone was suprised to see this

Rajbeer- Bas aunty bas... main itni der se chup rahan iska matlam yeh nahi ke aap kuch bhi kahen... main apki umar ka liyaz kar rahan hoon ...
preeto ko haath bhi maat lagana...

Simran and dhruv come forwards ...

Simran- Rajbeer how dare you hold my mum ...

Rajbeer looked angrily at them and put his other hand out to tell them to stop... he let her hand go ... NA held her wrist with her hand saying ow...

NA- acha ab tum humare against jao ge... for this b*tch... kya lagti hain yeh tumhari

Rajbeer- CHUP!!! main preeto se pyaar karta hoon !! aur woh mujhse bhi bauth pyaar karti hain... sun liya aapne ... aur agar kisi ne mere pyaar ke barai pe kuch bura kahan toh mujhse bura koi nahin hoga... now GET OUT!!!!

Dhruv- WHat!! tum ye teekh nahi kar rahe ... meri maa ke saath batamizi... aur mere behen ka dil tor diya ...

Rajbeer- Didn't you hear ??? i said get out !!! all of you... all the guests went out quickly...

NA- Chalo beta lets go ... leave this small people ... chalo dhruv

Neelam aunty took her daughter away pulling her along with her ... meeta , bani , sonu and ishu stood by preeto crying ...because she was crying

Dhruv- Chalo ishu ...

Ishu didn't move.. she stayed with preeto ...

NA- Chor do isko ... yeh bhi inke saath hain ... humare nahin ... maine toh pehle ka ta isse shaadi kar ke bauth bari galti ki...

Dhruv looked at ishu with disgust and then at rajbeer and went out with his family.. I'm going to get you for this rajbeer he thought ...

Edited by xxAqeelahxx - 13 years ago

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Aqeelah

@xxAqeelahxx

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#12

Thanks saina and bobby :) i've written the part but it's not that good ...
am sure you lot are better writers than me so feel free to take part after this

Edited by xxAqeelahxx - 13 years ago

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Aqeelah

@xxAqeelahxx

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#13

sorry if there;s any mistakes...

Edited by xxAqeelahxx - 13 years ago

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Aqeelah

@xxAqeelahxx

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#14

Guys if anyone wants me to pm them then
send me a buddy request :)

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Saina

@--Saina--

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#15

Just finished reading and u did awesome job dear 👏..Aqueela , the way you made RB warn NA was Superb..Mein has has ke pagal ho gayi the whole of NA's antics padke

Loved below lines a lot..This is all what we wanted to see in TV but CV's ne Beja ghuma diya different approach daal ke

Neelam aunty came towards preeto and put her hand across to slap preeto...
Rajbeer grabbed Neelam aunty's hand ...

Neelam aunty was popping her eyes out at rajbeer ... and simran was shocked to at rajbeers behaviour... everyone was suprised to see this

Rajbeer- CHUP!!! main preeto se pyaar karta hoon !! aur woh mujhse bhi bauth pyaar karti hain... sun liya aapne ... aur agar kisi ne mere pyaar ke barai pe kuch bura kahan toh mujhse bura koi nahin hoga... now GET OUT!!!!

Thanks for writing and making us feel happy ...😛🤗

Edited by ankitaluv - 13 years ago

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Sneha Patro

@snehapatro

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

#16

woww Aqeelah i jus loved it...and specially Rajbeer dialogues...the way he warned NA is too superbbb...👏...Do continue...👍🏼

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Raj_preet

@Raj_preet

Dazzler

Posted: 13 years ago

#17

Originally posted by: ankitaluv

Neelam aunty came towards preeto and put her hand across to slap preeto...
Rajbeer grabbed Neelam aunty's hand ...

Neelam aunty was popping her eyes out at rajbeer ... and simran was shocked to at rajbeers behaviour... everyone was suprised to see this

Rajbeer- CHUP!!! main preeto se pyaar karta hoon !! aur woh mujhse bhi bauth pyaar karti hain... sun liya aapne ... aur agar kisi ne mere pyaar ke barai pe kuch bura kahan toh mujhse bura koi nahin hoga... now GET OUT!!!!

Thanks for writing and making us feel happy ...😛🤗

These 3 are jst wow aqeelah 👏want to see this on screen also😍 nd u give best to rajbeer 👍🏼loved it

jst awesome 😃plz continue dear

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Madhuban Sen

@madhubansen

Inactive

Posted: 13 years ago

#18

Originally posted by: ankitaluv
Go on dear .. Deal from me😛 ...I am awful writer tooo and will try my best to help..👍🏼

In any case we have gem of writers like Madhu, Sneha, Bobby and many more and wll chime in 😉

@ all sssp writers...all of u r great...& we all r d gems of dis forum...

continue plzz...

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Madhuban Sen

@madhubansen

Inactive

Posted: 13 years ago

#19

o ya......o ya......o ya......

u taught NA a lesson...🤗...🤗...🤗

u taught dhruv a lesson for his idiocity..🥳..🥳...🥳

u opened simmi's eyes...👍🏼 ...👍🏼...👍🏼

u r great yaar...👍🏼...loved ur version...👏...keep up d anti ahluwallias movement...😃...