Your View on remarriage

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Netri

@iViews

Rocker

Posted: 14 years ago

#11

Originally posted by: Sinha18
I want KK to spend his rest of life alone with the sweet memories of his wife.....life is too short these days and it is very easy to live alone and peacefully😊

U r awfull Himanshu.... I hope u meant it as a funny comment.... 😃 I think it always individual's choice. If U think u can spend ur rest of the life alone, Go ahead.... If U think U need some to share ur sorrows, happiness with ..... great. But I think spending a life alone takes courage , everyone around u who love U, will have a family their resposibilities...No matter how much they love u but they can't leave their resposibilities and come to ur aid for a long time. reality will be u r alone and u have to rely on others like neighbours or firends or family members and more importantly on their schedule.... Far more important is how r u as a old person ???? Do u nage a lot or U r willing to work according to others.... Willing to accept their ways, technics and trust them.... I have spend quite a lot time with old peoples.... I know them some of them just wants u to run for the door as soon as u see them. 😕 They can frustrate u quite a lot... Not all of them r like that , Some of them r really angels..... 😛

As luck will have it himanshu.... U might just end up living more than u anticipate ...... 😉 Human being r never peaceful or happy unless V end up being a hermitt. 😆

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Sheema

@infinity00

Rocker

Posted: 14 years ago

#12

20 years ago one of our family friends remarried, his sons were grown up , one son was my brother,s best friend, my brother was very upset, my late mother said to her " What he has done is right as children can easily look after there widow mother but could not bare there father , as women tend to adjust there lives according to there children and grand children ,s life style but men feels lost with out there life partner, so if I die let your father remarry again", we laughed at that time , but seriously if my father was 10 year younger then what he is now, and in better health I would have seriously thought about it, as he is living with my brother, my mother spoiled my father big time, and obviously living in US, everybody is busy , no one in the house during day time , he is all alone, he hates it, he has become sensitive that nobody takes care of him, his sons are useless etc etc but in reality nothing like that.
So honestly most men can not live with out a life partner , I used the word most men, KK doesnt seems to be like one of those, there is nothing wrong in it, but only if he want to , if he is happy living with the memory of his late life then let him.
Women can live without husbands happily with there children and grand children but usually men finds it difficult to cope, my father is finding it very hard, thats why he is becoming more sick and difficult to handle as he sees everything negative and wrong way.

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Pooja

@poshah

Voyager

Posted: 14 years ago

#13

nice replies by one and all..especially shwetha, laxmi and venture

Loved what you said shwetha that eveyrone is thinking abt right now, no one is thinking abt the future. KK doesnt realise that maybe in future he might feel lonely, that he may not remain physically as active as he is right now, that his daughters no matter how much they love him cannot be there with him physically daily, daily he will have to come home to a lonely house. So yes he should think abt the future. Everyone likes to say i will manage but its a difficult life.

I woudl say KK should accept and which he does that staying alone will be difficult, and is he ready to live that kinda life.

And agree to what venture said, for men it is difficult, why because there cannot be anyone who takes care of him like his wife, right from morning bed tea, to manpasand ka nashta , naha kar kapde lana, jhuta moja dena, bimari mein khayal rakhna. And women tend to get busy with the home work as well. So unless men can do some work say gardening, social ,volluntary work etc. what will he do after he has retired ? Sit at home and read papers.watch tv ?
Life can be good only if he has grand kids...KK ke to ladke hai hi nahi.

And yes what everyone said is right, that he loves his wife etc etc..but then its a fact that he is living and needs to spend the rest of his life..So if he finds someone his age and he gels with her then why not get married. Else there is no denying that life will get difficult for him.

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Charu

@Krinya

Trailblazer

+ 8

Posted: 14 years ago

#14

Originally posted by: Sinha18
I want KK to spend his rest of life alone with the sweet memories of his wife.....life is too short these days and it is very easy to live alone and peacefully😊

i pray you never get to experience that loneliness to know what it is....if it's easy to live alone and peacefully the early human wouldn't have started living in groups ..man wud never raise a family & build a society...😊

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Charu

@Krinya

Trailblazer

+ 8

Posted: 14 years ago

#15

Originally posted by: 111192
In my opinion what shanti massi is saying is absolutely right................but if KK wanted to marry or felt lonely he would have married long back when his daughter's needed mother.................but i think .............not getting married was a well thought decision on KK 's part..............as he loved his wife so much that he knew he wont be able to give love to his second wife which would be unfair to her.........and of course fear of bringing a step mom for his daughter's would have also stopped him............................so if KK can live without a companion for last 15-16 years then he can live without a companion even now.

precisely ! KK had a reason for not marrying at that time..fear of getting a stepmom for his daughters , was prolly right..that's why he decided to stay single and raised his children on his own..he tried his best to give them the love of a father and mother....but now when sanjana will also marry and get busy in her life, then may be KK will feel the need of a companion...he was not alone all these days..he had his lovely daughters with him to support him..

loneliness is of many types...like me..i have 2 daughters but when i think of the future, i get scared that i might get lonely after they marry but then i have my husband with me...another type of loneliness is when u have everyone around u but still ur lonely...like when sons gets busy with their wives n children and neglect their parents....and then there r ppl. who decide not to marry (lets ask their opinion how imp. a companion is in their life) and childless couples....loneliness can throw a person in depression....it's like a disease....for whom r u living for? ur husband & ur children..certainly not for neighbours, friends, relatives or social networking site...i'm not saying people do not ! of course they do but is it by choice or fate?

at this age, the reason for getting married is not to satisfy their physical desires but for emotional needs....if KK finds someone whos as good as his first wife (like badi ma), who's as lonely as he is, then why not? therez no need to wear that sehra n take out a baarat (like suhana was dreaming)....why will the society oppose? ageing is a reality for everyone & need for a companion is understandable..."age" should not be the reason for not getting married...one always need a partner who loves you , understands you , with whom you can share your joys & sorrows ! when her husband left her alone, Badi Ma had her family with her , isn't she lonely? from outside she might show that she's very happy but there IS a vacuum in her life..bec. you need someone who's living just for you...you need that ONE person in life....and he can only be ur life partner ..may be that's why they call them "life partner"..ur children, friends , relatives everyone have their own life and they should...so IF it's possible then go ahead with it....

Edited by _charu_ - 14 years ago

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Charu

@Krinya

Trailblazer

+ 8

Posted: 14 years ago

#16

Originally posted by: venture

So honestly most men can not live with out a life partner , I used the word most men, KK doesnt seems to be like one of those, there is nothing wrong in it, but only if he want to , if he is happy living with the memory of his late life then let him.
Women can live without husbands happily with there children and grand children but usually men finds it difficult to cope, my father is finding it very hard, thats why he is becoming more sick and difficult to handle as he sees everything negative and wrong way.

memory...it's easy to say that i'll spend rest of the life with memories but memories can never take the place of a living being...practically, it's possible to move on if only WE give a chance..

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BeOptimistic

@allizzwell

Stunner

+ 5

Posted: 14 years ago

#17

@charu

Glad to see u posting here dear.....🤗...

Yest. there was a tremendous focus on loneliness.... both from trivedi's POV and deepak's POV...also i guess BM's massage etc was shown to highlight loneliness.... as even she is tagged in this singledom status.... but fortunate that .... she is a woman....she has the ability to move on....also there r gentle hearts around her that cared for her.... loved her .... and never left her to her fate.....

Reg. KK.... he has been busy till now and never ever thot of anyone else in vidisha's place .... but after sanju's marraige.... when he wud fall all alone.... his mind too wud get still.... he wud defn. be lost as to what ultimate thing is there for him to yet move on.... for what? it is a sad phase when it is necessary for men to feel wanted..... I dun know how they conclude this shaadi here relating to KK......but no Gurpreet can take vidisha's place...😆... possibly if he finds someone as compatible as vidisha to whom he feels companionship can happen.... then it is fine....😊

I remembered himanshu while watching the trivedi case yest. ........as i had just replied here to his post reg. loneliness and that was so well narrated thru trivedi case.... Himanshu this is the harsh thing that happens.... once when the kids turn men and settle in their busy lives.... they tend to forget their childhood days when their parents were alwyas there for them no matter how busy they were and no matter how much ever times they needed to explain certain things for them..... now if u think... the young blood hardly bother to take out time for their parents and even get irritated if told to repeat what was being addressed..... i will post a video here reg. this.... One will understand the pain.... of loneliness.....

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2kpLDkWg5DA&NR=1[/YOUTUBE]

Edited by laxmi_s - 14 years ago

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Charu

@Krinya

Trailblazer

+ 8

Posted: 14 years ago

#18

Originally posted by: laxmi_s
@charu
Glad to see u posting here dear.....🤗...

Yest. there was a tremendous focus on loneliness.... both from trivedi's POV and deepak's POV...also i guess BM's massage etc was shown to highlight loneliness.... as even she is tagged in this singledom status.... but fortunate that .... she is a woman....she has the ability to move on....also there r gentle hearts around her that cared for her.... loved her .... and never left her to her fate.....

Reg. KK.... he has been busy till now and never ever thot of anyone else in vidisha's place .... but after sanju's marraige.... when he wud fall all alone.... his mind too wud get still.... he wud defn. be lost as to what ultimate thing is there for him to yet move on.... for what? it is a sad phase when it is necessary for men to feel wanted..... I dun know how they conclude this shaadi here relating to KK......but no Gurpreet can take vidisha's place...😆... possibly if he finds someone as compatible as vidisha to whom he feels companionship can happen.... then it is fine....😊

I remembered himanshu while watching the trivedi case yest. ........as i had just replied here to his post reg. loneliness and that was so well narrated thru trivedi case.... Himanshu this is the harsh thing that happens.... once when the kids turn men and settle in their busy lives.... they tend to forget their childhood days when their parents were alwyas there for them no matter how busy they were and no matter how much ever times they needed to explain certain things for them..... now if u think... the young blood hardly bother to take out time for their parents and even get irritated if told to repeat what was being addressed..... i will post a video here reg. this.... One will understand the pain.... of loneliness.....

thanks dear 🤗

well, everyone wants to feel wanted don't they? why restrict it to men? women r emotionally , physically and financially more dependent....it's just a social prejudice i guess which stops women from moving on.....otherwise dada dadi wud have thought of getting shailja married after filing a divorce with their son...

"also there r gentle hearts around her that cared for her.... loved her .... and never left her to her fate....."

that's what i said na.."fate"..accepting fate is something different and loneliness by choice is something else...

Edited by _charu_ - 14 years ago

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Shwetha

@Shwets1502

Achiever

+ 2

Posted: 14 years ago

#19

@laxmi di and charu.....superb posts....loved both of them....for the fact that u both have written what exactly life is about....thank u soo much...

@laxmi di....i totally agree...KK is not thinking about his future even now...he thinks he can manage...which may not be the case always...it will definitely be interesting to see how this track goes on....and iam waiting for the suhana-KK interaction...it will definitely be a treat to watch...we havent had many emotional scenes of them except for the initial phagpere...

i would just say...KK needs a companion...and Shanti Massi is searching a wife...there is a difference...and for KK...he has to find his companion...no one else can do it for him...

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BeOptimistic

@allizzwell

Stunner

+ 5

Posted: 14 years ago

#20

@charu

Just now read your other 2 views on the same.... i was posting mine at that time hence cud not read it earlier.....😆

Loved your take on loneliness moves on to depression..... very very true.... which the young minds don't know defn. ..... There is been a hell a lot of difference in my FIL's life pre and post my MIL's demise.... Though basically he is a reserved person by nature... earlier he used to oppose our views where he felt and stood for his wife....😆... no matter whether she was right or wrong..... but that support or the backing thing was always given by him.......though they had the dada-dadi 's tom and jerry fights of SGP...... awww... we cud feel the amit-hema jodi in them... the perfect pair.... 😳....now he obviously misses her thru her fights, her instigations.... her absence is felt by him..... we tried our best to divert his mind by taking him for bowling sessions, to the museum as he loves to observe the historical things.... we tried to be with him the way he prefers...but we know deep within.... those secs can give him happiness for a brief time but cannot fill his vaccuum ......

Reg. the woman's emotional handling capability charu....i feel we woman r stronger emotionally and we try our best to move on.... where as the men lean on to their wives for this emotional strength.... and hence they find it difficult to move on.....😊

@Shwets

Forget KK as Suhana and Sanju's dad getting married Shwets.... forget everything... think about only KK.... him sitting in his living room in the night.... no one around.... can u see how awful it wud look .... to see him lost.... that is where the depression creeps in dear.... so i stick to this... if a person as good as Vidisha enters his life.... a companionship wud be ideal for him....

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