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llSerenityll thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#61

Originally posted by: tamzin43

😳😳

How are women and tornadoes alike?

They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave


🤣
maddy311 thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail Visit Streak 30 Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#62

Originally posted by: varshu27

A young couple, on the brink of
divorce, visits a marriage counsellor. The counsellor asks the wife,
"What is the problem?" She responds, "My husband suffers from
premature ejaculation." The counsellor turns to her husband and
inquires, "Is that true?" The husband replies, "Well not exactly,
she's the one that suffers, not me."


🤣yeah true
tamzin43 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#63

Originally posted by: maddy311


🤣must be urmi and jitu




🤣🤣
🤣

tamzin43 thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail Networker 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#64
😳😆😉

On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe. The proud husband says, "My dear, we are married now, you can open your robe." The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished."Oh, oh, aaahhh," he exclaims, "My God you are so beautiful, let me take your picture. Puzzled she asks, "My picture?" He answers, "Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart forever".

She smiles and he takes her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower. He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, "Why do you wear a robe? We are married now." At that the man opens his robe and she exclaims, "oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a picture". He beams and asks why and she answers, "So I can get it enlarged!"
llSerenityll thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#65

Dirty Little Matt is sitting in the back of math class, obviously not paying any attention, when the teacher calls his name.

"Yeah teacher?" he replies.

"If there are three ducks on a fence and you shoot one of them with a shotgun, how many are left?" asks the teacher.

Matt answers "Well, teach, if I shoot one of them with a shotgun, the loud noise is gonna make them all fly off."

"No, Matt, there will be two left if you shoot one with a shotgun, but I like the way you're thinking." the teacher responds.

"Well, teach, I've got a question for you... There are 3 women that come out of an ice-cream parlor, one is biting her ice-cream cone, one is licking it, and one is sucking on it. Which one is married?"

The teacher, a little taken back by the question answers, "Well, uh, gee Matt, I guess the one that's sucking on the ice cream."

Matt replies "No teacher, the one that has the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking!"

Edited by llSerenityll - 13 years ago
llSerenityll thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#66

Originally posted by: tamzin43

😳😆😉

On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe. The proud husband says, "My dear, we are married now, you can open your robe." The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished."Oh, oh, aaahhh," he exclaims, "My God you are so beautiful, let me take your picture. Puzzled she asks, "My picture?" He answers, "Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart forever".

She smiles and he takes her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower. He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, "Why do you wear a robe? We are married now." At that the man opens his robe and she exclaims, "oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a picture". He beams and asks why and she answers, "So I can get it enlarged!"


I read that one online a while ago. 🤣
tamzin43 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#67

Originally posted by: llSerenityll

Dirty Little Matt is sitting in the back of math class, obviously not paying any attention, when the teacher calls his name.

"Yeah teacher?" he replies.

"If there are three ducks on a fence and you shoot one of them with a shotgun, how many are left?" asks the teacher.

Matt answers "Well, teach, if I shoot one of them with a shotgun, the loud noise is gonna make them all fly off."

"No, Matt, there will be two left if you shoot one with a shotgun, but I like the way you're thinking." the teacher responds.

"Well, teach, I've got a question for you... There are 3 women that come out of an ice-cream parlor, one is biting her ice-cream cone, one is licking it, and one is sucking on it. Which one is married?"

The teacher, a little taken back by the question answers, "Well, uh, gee Matt, I guess the one that's sucking on the ice cream."

Matt replies "No teach, the one that has the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking!"



well i guess you get to learn a lot at school these day😲😲😲
maddy311 thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail Visit Streak 30 Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#68

Originally posted by: llSerenityll

Dirty Little Matt is sitting in the back of
math class, obviously not paying any attention, when the teacher
calls his name.


"Yeah teacher?" he replies.


"If there are three ducks on a fence and
you shoot one of them with a shotgun, how many are left?" asks
the teacher.


Matt answers "Well, teach, if I shoot one
of them with a shotgun, the loud noise is gonna make them all fly
off."


"No, Matt, there will be two left if you
shoot one with a shotgun, but I like the way you're thinking."
the teacher responds.


"Well, teach, I've got a question for
you... There are 3 women that come out of an ice-cream parlor, one
is biting her ice-cream cone, one is licking it, and one is sucking
on it. Which one is married?"


The teacher, a little taken back by the
question answers, "Well, uh, gee Matt, I guess the one that's
sucking on the ice cream."


Matt replies "No teacher, the one that has
the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're
thinking!"



🤣🤣
shruthi2010 thumbnail
15th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 13 years ago
#69

Originally posted by: llSerenityll

Dirty Little Matt is sitting in the back of math class, obviously not paying any attention, when the teacher calls his name.

"Yeah teacher?" he replies.

"If there are three ducks on a fence and you shoot one of them with a shotgun, how many are left?" asks the teacher.

Matt answers "Well, teach, if I shoot one of them with a shotgun, the loud noise is gonna make them all fly off."

"No, Matt, there will be two left if you shoot one with a shotgun, but I like the way you're thinking." the teacher responds.

"Well, teach, I've got a question for you... There are 3 women that come out of an ice-cream parlor, one is biting her ice-cream cone, one is licking it, and one is sucking on it. Which one is married?"

The teacher, a little taken back by the question answers, "Well, uh, gee Matt, I guess the one that's sucking on the ice cream."

Matt replies "No teacher, the one that has the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking!"



🤣 i m having stitches in my stomach i m laughing like mad
llSerenityll thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#70

Originally posted by: tamzin43



well i guess you get to learn a lot at school these day😲😲😲


You betchya 😆Another example of what we learn !! 😛

A teacher was wrapping up class, and started talking about tomorrow's final exam. He said there would be no excuses for not showing up tomorrow, barring a dire medical condition or an immediate family member's death. One smart ass, male student said, "What about extreme sexual exhaustion?", and the whole classroom burst into laughter.

After the laughter had subsided, the teacher glared at the student, and said, "Not an excuse, you can use your other hand to write."

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