How i would love this scene!Updated Final part

durgeshwari thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#1

Since these days the track seems to focus more on Kinjal and her dilemma and also on the koki-rashi ego trip,our favorite love birds have not had a chance to come on screen and give us those lovely moments.

So, I just dreamt and wrote this fictional piece. Please let me know your thoughts:-


I want that Rashi should mislead Gopi as she has done so many times in the past ( the infamous laptop washing episode etc.. etc..).So I want that Rashi should try and mislead Gopi into doing something really stupid in the future. But for a change Ahem would be lurking nearby during that time talking on his phone. Since he has already developed some attraction for Gopi after being smitten by her in that green lehenga and that "to die for moment" where he cleans and tends to her wound,he already knows that Gopi is a nice person but a little naive. So, he tries to keep tab of the situation. Once he realizes that Gopi trusts Rashi blindly and Rashi is the real culprit ,he decides to take matter in his own hands since Mom is behaving very weirdly these days because of some tension with Kinjal. He decides to make Gopi more wordly wise. Its alright if he cant accept her as of wife but he can surely as a friend guide her so that she is not hurt by anyone in the future.

Gopi is about to enter her room at night after keeping a glass of water in Maaji's room. As she extends her hand to open the door of her room,somebody grabs her arm and pulls her. She is shocked and is unable to see who is it in the dark. She realizes she is pulled against a man's chest which seems as strong as a rock. Ahem places a hand on her mouth and leads her towards his room. Gopi's heart pounds as a range of emotions choke her: shock,excitement,curiosity.."Oh Kanhaji...please help".Just then Ahem opens the door and keeps a hand on her tiny waist and gently pulls her inside and closes the door. He removes his hand from her mouth and asks her to sit down.

Gopi coyly sits down and is about to place the pallu on her head when Ahem catches hold of her hand and tells her that " he has begun to really respect her. He has his own issues in his past which he has been fighting but he really cares for her as a friend and would like to protect her. He recounts how he heard Rashi poisoning her and how Gopi believed her and thus was tricked by her."As Gopi feels a little embarrassed by her failure to understand Rashi's motives,a tear rolls down her cheek. Ahem is suddenly gripped by an emotion so unknown to him that he feels it will drown him . He feels like wiping that tear off Gopi's face and hugging her tightly.

He realizes that he has been feeling really lost since the last couple of days since Mom has not been making appearances during breakfast or dinner and also she seems to be extremely tensed because of the Diwali fiasco or due to Kinjal's wedding. So he does not feel like bothering Mom by revealing Rashi's antiques to her so he will help dear Gopi on his own.

He asks Gopi to weigh situations a bit more wisely before taking any action and he says that she can call him up anytime if she needs advice. He says that, "Mom also loves you a lot and if you keep getting into a lot more trouble then this will hurt her a lot. So, you can look up to me as a friend and confide in me."

Gopi smiles and nodes to his words. She loves the fact that he is still holding her hand and is looking into her eyes so gently. Suddenly there is a lot of commotion outside and they hear someone talking on the phone. Ahem is slightly perturbed as he doesn't want anybody to see Gopi in his room at this hour. So, he dims the light of the lamp and waits. The noise does not go away and when he looks at Gopi he finds that her eyes are half closed. He suggests that she lie down as she would be really tired and he would wake her up when the noise goes away. She lies down and Ahem goes away to sit and work on his laptop.

Gopi lies with her eyes closed and feels the gaze of Ahem's eyes searching her face. Ahem is so frustrated. He just wants to keep staring at Gopi as he knows that he wouldn't get such a chance in the near future. Whenever she sees that he is approaching ,she places that pallu on her head. Oh !! how he hates that pallu. But he himself has to be blamed for that.

Suddenly memories of the past haunt him and he feels that he has been drained of all the life he has in him. He goes to the bed and lies besides Gopi who is fast asleep now. He looks at her hand that is still bandaged and remembers how well and quietly she coped with her pain and was so considerate of his Mom. He looks at her face,which is so serene and beautiful,he places a hand on her cheek and it feels like silk. He looks at her lips which are so scarlet red and suddenly the urge to press his lips against her is so strong that he feels he will die if he resists the urge anymore. He cradles her tiny face in his hand and his heart is full of love and care. He realizes that there is a pressing bodily urge to make love to her right then and there but he wants that he should amend all his wrongdoings towards her in the past and make her reciprocate his love!!With a sigh his eyes close and he too falls asleep besides his love.

Edited by PujaThapar - 14 years ago

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upasana.diya thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#2
ohhh my God.... two FF writers have joined us today... am so so so happy...

can you convert it into a fanfic.... your idea is fantastic
durgeshwari thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#3
Thanks Dear.

I have a lot more ideas.Would love to pen them here.

upasana.diya thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#4

Originally posted by: PujaThapar

Thanks Dear.


I have a lot more ideas.Would love to pen them here.



ohhh we are gluttons for FFs... starving indeed... 2 FFs in this forum have just been completed by two of our most fabulous writers... check them out too... you will find FF listings in Archive Mansion Page 2

Telly_Addict thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#5
First of all welcome to the forum Puja............
m sadhli and ur FF is World Class.....*sorry all my adjectives have already used so using this*

gr8 and amazing......keep update its second part soon......we are crazy bunch and normally love FF on forum more than stupid show.......

Thanks for writing such wonderful FF for us...
saina01 thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#6
That was simply breathtaking! And I completely agree with diya, you should definitely transform this into a FF..
I'm fiza..
NotYourType thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#7
Oh God.....that was fantastic Pooja...I must say you have a gift of writing and imagination. And you can understand and elabourate character's emotions very well. 👏 waiting for more.😊
ruksm thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#8

So many hidden talents in the forum..That was very nice dear..If Ahem does anything like that in the serial, kya baat hai..

As u rightly put Ahem has to first make amends for his earlier rude behaviour before he gets physically close now..
Do share ur other thots..👏
durgeshwari thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#9
Chapter 2
Ahem moves his body lazily in the bed and knowingly keeps his eyes tight shut,he extends a hand to the other side of the bed where Gopi had fallen asleep last night. He couldn't get any sleep into his system last night. He tried so hard, but failed at keeping his mind from thinking about Gopi's soft body sprawled inches away from him, the radiance of her skin which felt like silk on touch,her lips which looked so sweet,which his mind and body wanted to look swollen after his barrage of kisses.He wanted to listen to her "moans" in those intimate moments.He smiled sheepishly to himself.He knew that if Gopi would get a hint of what was running through his mind, she would just jump and go away,cover her head with that damn "pallu" forever and shout out loud to her "kanhaji". Oh!! how thinking of her innocence made him smile.He searched for her body on the other side of the bed and found that she was still asleep.He glanced at the alarm clock at his bedside with one eye and found that there was still one hour to go for him to go jogging and dear Gopi to wake up.He ran the back of his palm across her cheek,felt the softness of a new born babies' skin and closed his eyes smiling.
Gopi opened her eyes and said a prayer to "kanhaji".Her body clock at got adjusted to getting up in the morning at the right time.She was just about to rush out of the bed when she became aware of her surroundings. She became stunned for a second and then looked right to where Ahem was sleeping.He looked like an innocent child when in sleep.She was sure it was a dream and not reality since she could see a faint smile outline his face. She had never seen him smile at her."Oh!! Kanhaji... he always looks so angry when he looks at me.He works so hard in office and i am sure all that work gets to him and when he comes back,i make some stupid mistake and it irritates him no end."She said another prayer for his health and prosperity and took one full glance at him and got off the bed and rushed to her room.
Gopi had taken a head bath and was coming out of the washroom when she heard a knock on the door and saw Ahem coming in her room.She took a second to place her pallu on her forehead as she was shocked by his presence.He said that she had dropped her earring in his room last night and he had come to return it.She thanked him and took the earring.Just then Maaji called and she rushed to the kitchen after making appropriate changes to her appearance.
As Ahem was returning from Gopi's room,he felt that he had been struck by lightening and it had pierced his heart.The sight of Gopi straight from the shower,her hair all wet and running across her cheeks was breathtaking.He wanted to rush and put his hand in her hair and caress them. Then came that "pallu" and his sight to heaven was obstructed.Sigh..Sigh....
During breakfast Ahem was oblivious to his surroundings and just wanted to steal a glance of Gopi who was so diligently serving Mom.After Kinjal goes to her sasuraal, I'm sure my Gopi would be the perfect daughter for her!!Still dreaming he heads towards office.
Crashed!!! The sound of his dream project being cancelled by Chiraag kaka even before the actual commencement brought Ahem to the ground.He felt so defeated and humiliated when kaka said that the standards of design and implementation that Ahem had finalized on with his team was not as per the standards of their company.The meeting ended and Ahem walked towards his cabin like a defeated man.He sat with his head in his hands for an hour,just then the phone rang.It was Gopi..Oh!! how he needed to hear her voice,how he needed her to tell him that everything would be alright.
She was telling him an incident of how Rashi asked her to go to his room and sort out his study table as it was full of dirt.She said that she told Rashi that Ahemji does not like his things to be touched when he is not there else he gets angry.Then she asks for his approval.He replies that well done and she could arrange his study table this weekend in his presence so that some important documents are not tampered with.She thanks him and says that even if she fails 10 times,she will not get dejected and would like to learn and become wordly wise as he wants her to be so that they as a family remain happy.He smiles at her words and they end their call.
Just then as he was resting his head in his hands and recalling his conversation with Gopi,he thought of the essence of her words.He went to Chiraag kaka and asked him for some time so that he could rework on his presentation.Chiraag kaka smiled and said "That's my Boy!!".Ahem worked straight for ten hours and completed the presentation and called Chiraag Kaka who was at home,if he could come to office and listen to the revised version.He agreed and finally the new presentation won Ahem a lot of accolades.Chiraag kaka praised him for his perseverance and Ahem thanked the inspiration behind his new enthusiasm.
Smiling, he headed towards MM.

durgeshwari thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#10
Thanks guys for all the love and the warm welcome. Ive posted the Chapter 2.Hope you like it!!!
I want the serial to have more of Ahem and Gopi scenes like i know all of us do!! They just keep giving us a glance of their magic in one episode and for weeks we get to bear with all the other characters!!!

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