Article: WANTED: Soap opera producers

Jolly well, who cares about the lather-blather? Whether or not Mihir will be reunited with his Tulsi, after a decade, two decades, in Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thhi? Or, if Parvati will end up loving her new husband in Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki? For that matter, who is the teenie-weenie bit interested in Kasauti Zindagi Kay and Prerna's release from prison, return to her husband Mr.Bajaj's home (note, please that after many years of intimate married life she still calls him Mr.Bajaj) only to discover that her beloved Prem (son, not her beloved husband) has usurped the throne and booted out her Mr.Bajaj with the tip of his silver cane (silver?) and now demands her departure from his 'home' with a swish of said instrument? No one. Or leastways, far fewer than before. These, the three top-rated shows, have experienced declining returns on investment as they plod along-that's what soap operas do as they grow older, and it's six years now for these veterans-with their familiar storylines, faces and predictable developments. That's their comfort zone-you know precisely what will happen (eventually, after more twist and turns than in last week's German Grand Prix course) and who will do what: for instance, when the good guy (or more often, good girl) appears on the screen soft, lilting music plays; when it's wicked Prem, the music is dark and foreboding. Six years on, these strengths are becoming weaknesses. The predictable has become the prosaic-there are only so many times that we can go through the emotional roller-coaster of Mihir and Tulsi being estranged, then reconciled, estranged again-and still care. Time for all soaps to revisit their fundamentals. Otherwise they will be swamped by reality TV. And when we say reality TV we mean the news as well as staged reality shows. Notice that The Great Laughter Challenge Show is the highest-rated show on Star One, a channel that otherwise boasts of youthful, vigorous soap operas. See how the talent contest Sa Re Ga Ma Pa managed to send Zee up to number two in the popularity charts. Serials such as Saat Phere and Kasamh Se have lathered well but it was Sa Re Ga... that supplied the soap gel. Conversely, Sony and Sahara One that don't air a happening reality show have dropped down the order. No wonder Sony is soon to introduce Dancing with the Stars, a new reality show. Above all, everyone should look at the rise and rise and rise of the Hindi news channels. No matter how much people like us bemoan the falling standards in what passes for news, the channels continue to surge forward. The little Prince saga, had more than 10 million viewers and gave the Hindi news channels their best outing. Perhaps ever. This is the power and the allure, inexplicable to many of us, of reality on TV. People don't seem to want pure fiction or facts. They want reality in the garb of a soap opera or better still a Bollywood masala. The melodrama surrounding Prince's rescue and the nation's vigil was far more riveting than the two gentlemen from Rajasthan, Mr Jaswant Singh and Mr Natwar Singh. Now, if only the latter was Mr Natwarlal, you'd have more takers for that kind of news.

A suggestion, actually two: first, soap opera producers, who have fallen on bad time could seek employment in TV news. Second, CNN-IBN's Sagarika Ghose deserves her own eponymous show on which she can air her own opinions which, interesting and provocative as they may be, should have no place on regular current affairs discussion programmes. Last Friday night on Face the Nation, she made more comments on messiers Singh and Singh than did her guests.