Posted:
Since everyone is anticipating how the scenes will go this week... I thought to write a two shot on it. Here is the first part. Only difference is Aahil knows Sanam stayed with him the night he had his nightmare as in he woke up on her lap. Missed SaHil scenes so badly today so decided to write something on them. Its kinds rushed and really long but hope u guys like it! Enjoy!!! The next part would have a redemption from Aahil's side and a strong Sanam who wont forgive him easily! It would be shorter too lol
Aahil's heart sank. Her expression was pinched and her lips trembled. He saw her convulsive swallow and heard her almost inaudible sob and the way her fingers twisted her dupatta in her lap. She loathed him. Being with him was like sitting before the devil, awaiting a death sentence. He could clearly feel the hate and disgust radiating from her body. A fist knotted in his chest, so tightly that for a moment he almost couldn't breathe. It wrenched at his insides, seeing her like this. He didn't want to do this. Allah knew, he didn't. But he did nothing to stop the feeling. He kept on torturing himself and her. Showing her what a monster he was. He had gone so far that there was no turning back. She was right. His heart was made of stone, his feelings nonexistent and his words-- shards of ice waiting to hurt the other person. Particularly Sanam. He should have just let her go and defended her when the people who went around claiming to be his friends were making fun of her. They were wrong anyway. Why did he pull her closer and declare his love for her! For her it was always a drama...What he knew as love. He had pushed away the only person who made him feel. The one who evoked emotions inside of him and made him feel human again. He hurt the one girl who provided him with a safe haven...a home. When those who claimed to love him forgot his existance she remembered. Yet he hurt her. When the whole world slept and he felt frightened she was there allowing him to hold her hand throughout the night. Yet he hurt her. He saw her get up and walk away. That was the difference between him and Rehan. He gave pain while Rehan made her smile. But then watching Rehan replace her tears with a smile burned his insides. It made him sick to the stomach. He wanted to take away all her pain but how could he when he himself was the sole reason for all her pain. Aahil knew he was not capable of making anyone happy. He only knew how to hurt and destroy. But at that moment he could not think. Seeing Rehan with Sanam prevented him from realizing his limits. It create a red haze that engulfed him and before he knew he grabbed Sanam by the waist and dragged her back to the party. He could not hear the song, he could not hear her protests, he could not hear anything over his heartbeats. His head throbbed and heart ached yet he didnt stop. He made sure he crossed all boundaries from where he could not seek forgiveness and made sure he would lose her forever. He would lose himself, his home, his refuge. He would cease to exist. He would destroy every bit of hope he had to rebuild his life. He was not thinking and did everything to end it all! As soon as he let her go she looked him straight in the eye. "Today you have shown me exactly why I hate you. I thought that perhaps there is a reason behind your actions but I was wrong! For you humanity, respect and dignity has no value! I may stay in this so called sham of a nikah for the next 3 months as decided but only to repay my debts thats all! 3 more months and then I am out. Only Allah knows how badly I am waiting for that day!" She said tears spilling out as Aahil stood stunned. She carried herself with dignity and left the room. His friends got the the cue to leave and so did Rehan. He was glad because all he heard was "3 months" and suddenly what he did seemed like a crime ten manifolds greater. She hated him...he knew! She thought he was a monster who had no respect... He knew! But she planned to leave him in 3 months! Aahil needed answers. If this nikah was for 3 months then why the false hopes! Why share a bed, why pretend, why lie! All for the property! His Ammi, Rehan and now Sanam! For everyone all that mattered was the property! Those days when everyone cared seems like a distant dream. Aahil had always felt loneliness on the inside but the assurance that his Ammi and Rehan were there seemed to lessen its affect. But things have changed, Aahil thought as he let his feet slip across the floor and sat by the poolside. As her words replayed, Aahil wondered what debt she was talking about? Those two lakhs were long forgotten by him. Then what? Why did Ammi hide all this from him. Aahil swallowed back the lump in his throat. He was sure Rehan knew as well. Is that why Sanam and him would exchange glances. Waiting for these horrid three months to be over so they could reunite. Aahil felt as he was punched in the gut. Her words stung. She couldn't wait to leave him! Her hatred killed him on the inside. Why was he kept in the dark? Despite his anger, he knew what happened tonight was wrong! He had acted out of impulse! Never before had he forced anyone! With Sanam, he couldn't control his emotions. But when this nikah had no meaning, why would his emotions matter! He had no right to stop her. A part of him wanted to loathe her for leaving him. Letting him slip away in the dark again but could he ever hate her? He couldnt. Not even when she wants his money, Rehan and everything but him. He closed his eyes as the loneliness engulfed him. He had no right to cross his limits especially since this nikah was for three months only. But why did Sanam not tell him! Did she assume he knew? Aahil thought back to the previous night. He was sitting by the poolside drinking when she walked over. There was no challenge in her tone, no anger in her eyes nor hatred in her approach. She was calm. "Main aapki biwi hoon, Aahil." She asked him to stop drinking and when he had refused... This was her answer which seemed simple and to the point for her but had left him more confused than ever. Her words had kept on ringing in his ears, even after had she walked away leaving him alone, confused and lonely. This happened every time she left. Her presence soothed him. Made him feel like he was breathing again. Living like a normal human being. Aahil felt the silence surrounding him but her words had managed to penetrate and possess his thoughts just like how she did. The entire house had been asleep but for Aahil peaceful sleep seemed like a wish that could never be fulfilled. The painful memories of his childhood which had the power to send a shiver down his spine during the day became powerful nightmares which shook him inside out at night. Sometimes he felt scared to sleep, fearing what would happen once he would close his eyes and go back into the painful past. Girls, wine and noise distracted him but also mocked his lack of being able to sleep, feel and breathe as freely as every other human being. But her presence had changed that. If this was indeed to end in 3 months then why? Why had she so calmly stated the lie that was the life changing truth for him? Was it to remind him how he wronged her? Or remind him to keep up the act of a perfect husband, even in private? Or did she genuinely care- about him? Cared about the man who destroyed her dreams, distanced her from her love and gave her nothing but hurt and insult. His heart pained and hoped while his mind sternly reminded him she would never care. Sanam wanted him to stop drinking because she was a girl of morals with a heart of gold. Her concern did not stop at friends and family. She had agreed to the nikah and no matter how much it hurt her she tried to fulfill all her responsibilities towards it. Just like how she found his watch, glares, wallet and keys whenever he needed them and silently organized his messed up room. But what about him? Wasn't he messed up inside out! Her words sounded soft and caring that he had wanted to believe that she would fix everything. Her eyes shined with genuine emotions. But was this also part of the drama? If this nikah was truly for 3 months then why did she care about his habits. Was she going to give him a chance? Had she given up tonight? Rehan's words about this nikah being wrong rang in Aahil's ears. Had this nikah been wrong from the beginning or had Aahil messed up everything himself? Did Sanam truly love Rehan? Aahil closed his eyes again trying to stop the conflicting voices and images that threatened to destroy him on the inside. He needed to put an end to all of this! The minutes seemed like hours but finally Aahil pulled himself together and went to their bedroom door. He knocked and surprisingly found the door open. The sight before him broke his heart. Sanam looked like someone had sucked out all the happiness and life out of her. Her tears dried left streaks across her beautiful cheeks but her face was pale. When she saw him walk in her teeth dug into her lower lip, as if she were fighting hard not to break down. That stopped him on his tracks. He didn't have the courage to face her not after what he had done. It was unforgivable but still things needed to be clear between them. Striding across the room, Aahil got down on his knees before her. "Sanam," he said quietly, "won't you even look at me?" Her soft mouth trembled. Her lashes swept low, her face turning away. A dull pain unfurled in his chest. On impulse, he stretched out a hand to cover hers. It was a mistake. She drew back with a hiss. "Don't," she whispered. "Please don't touch me." His jaw clenched. He willed away the angry demand that swelled in him. Instead he said, softly, "Please, Sanam. We need to talk." "No." "Please?" She shook her head. "No. There is nothing left to talk about. Not with you." Aahil inhaled. "Sanam listen I know--" "Don't! Don't give me your usual taunts because trust me I will say things you wont like to hear. Nor do you have any right to ask for forgiveness. And don't look at me like that!" Her voice was thin and high but she continued. "I was always right about you." "You were. I am not here to ask for forgiveness since I know I don't deserve it. But before you move on I want you to know something. Something I should have said to you long ago. If I dont tell you now, I can never say it. Just give me one chance to say it! Then you can decide. I promise you will be free from me. Reh---Rehan will always be there for you." Her eyes climbed slowly to his. If Aahil hadn't already been on his knees, the torment and shock he glimpsed on her face would have surely put him there. She was probably wondering why he wasn't being his usual hateful self. Aahil knew Sanam didnt trust him. He wasn't Rehan. But tonight he couldn't just let things end like this. "Don't hate me please" Aahil whispered as his voice cracked and his eyes burned with tears. He couldn't lose her. No!
Web Series
Kabhi Neem Neem Kabhi Shahad Shahad
Love Friendship Dating and Relationships
Tum Se Tum Tak
Financial markets and global economy
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
124