Posted:
*Walks lifelessly and shoulder budges a mentally unstable and grief stricken Tere Naam uttering Salman Khan. 'Your life may look like shit right now buddy' - I whisper hoarsely, 'your lover couldn't run away, say no to her father or delay killing herself for 7 minutes before you dragged yourself (chains and all) to the wedding venue. Must suck eh?' Salman Khan grunted his agreement. 'But you know what sucks more champ? When you waste 30 minutes of your life everyday for a stupid, blinded hero that is going to end up marrying a one eyed witch instead of the love of his life' I respond. Salman Khan looked at my miserable state and ushered me to the opening doors of the mental institute vehicle. 'You're in need of more treatment then myself' he muttered.
^ THAT ladies and gentleman is the story of my life!
If I were capable of growing a mustache (Oh wait we girls do endure a tad issue of facial hair - Thank the Lord for hair removal techniques! - but not me ofcourse. I'm perfect, didn't you all know?) then I would have grown a beard longer and thicker than Santa Clause. I would have worn a scruffy-I've-not-washed-for-several-days look to EMPHASIZE how depressed I am after reading the new article (Asad marrying Tannu and all).
You guys ever watched dramas whereby a dramatic life changing revelation befalls before the world and the camera pans and zooms into EVERY shocked face? You know ... when the camera zooms in so close that you have a glimpse of the hair lurking within those nostrils? Then you go 'Ah ha! You're not so perfect after all, you hairy gorilla!' Yes well those dramatic things usually occur at a wedding or a party with several guests to witness the humiliation and verbal abuse the heroine usually receives in front of everyone.
GUESS where I was when the news of Asad and the One Eyed witches possible marriage spoiler was revealed to me. Where could a beautiful Aishwarya Rai looking (and even better LAWL - I flatter myself) single (hint hint - if you look like a mixture of John Abraham and Arjun Rampal - PM ME ROAWRRR HAHA JOKES!) woman like me be at around 1:47am? Not a party or a club but a FREAKING TOILET! Don't you dare deny it! EVERYONE uses their phone to stalk, reply to delayed texts and to Facebook/India Forum when they are using the DUNNY (i.e. toilet). If you act all superior and deny it, then please leave! (But click on the like button before you leave. 🤣 Self esteem reasons and all).
The timing and setting of the revelation couldn't have been any worse! What a blimingly awkward situation to be yelling in outrage, waking the household up from my anger. The mother was worried that I had encountered a ghost or a thief only to realize that the venting of outrage was coming from inside the toilet. Oh well. The news was so revolting that I simply could not refrain from the sound effects and curses.
IF and I say IF the news comes true and Asad marries the creepy lady, I officially call it quits! I REFUSE to watch this show. I REFUSE! Even Karan Singh Grovers beautiful fingers wont beckon me to return. I have my pride! I will find beautiful fingers ELSEWHERE! I will survive! (I'm a survivor, I'm gonna make it, I'm a survivor, keep on surviving!). Yes, call me a coward for ditching the show and being unfaithful during its downfall. Call me a coward! That is why you never saw me fighting in either Jodha Akbar or Asoka's army! Hell to the freaking no! Would I seduce the leaders? HELL YEAH! But will I fight a losing war? HELL NO! I would be those soldiers that would lie down and feign death until it's over. So if I could do that (shame shame on me! TUFF TUFF) you think I wont walk away from this? HA!
P.S. If the news is incorrect then please overlook this entire post and welcome me back in! 🤣
Regards
SamiraTheToiletQueen!
You guys ever watched dramas whereby a dramatic life changing revelation befalls before the world and the camera pans and zooms into EVERY shocked face? You know ... when the camera zooms in so close that you have a glimpse of the hair lurking within those nostrils? Then you go 'Ah ha! You're not so perfect after all, you hairy gorilla!' Yes well those dramatic things usually occur at a wedding or a party with several guests to witness the humiliation and verbal abuse the heroine usually receives in front of everyone.
GUESS where I was when the news of Asad and the One Eyed witches possible marriage spoiler was revealed to me. Where could a beautiful Aishwarya Rai looking (and even better LAWL - I flatter myself) single (hint hint - if you look like a mixture of John Abraham and Arjun Rampal - PM ME ROAWRRR HAHA JOKES!) woman like me be at around 1:47am? Not a party or a club but a FREAKING TOILET! Don't you dare deny it! EVERYONE uses their phone to stalk, reply to delayed texts and to Facebook/India Forum when they are using the DUNNY (i.e. toilet). If you act all superior and deny it, then please leave! (But click on the like button before you leave. 🤣 Self esteem reasons and all).
The timing and setting of the revelation couldn't have been any worse! What a blimingly awkward situation to be yelling in outrage, waking the household up from my anger. The mother was worried that I had encountered a ghost or a thief only to realize that the venting of outrage was coming from inside the toilet. Oh well. The news was so revolting that I simply could not refrain from the sound effects and curses.
IF and I say IF the news comes true and Asad marries the creepy lady, I officially call it quits! I REFUSE to watch this show. I REFUSE! Even Karan Singh Grovers beautiful fingers wont beckon me to return. I have my pride! I will find beautiful fingers ELSEWHERE! I will survive! (I'm a survivor, I'm gonna make it, I'm a survivor, keep on surviving!). Yes, call me a coward for ditching the show and being unfaithful during its downfall. Call me a coward! That is why you never saw me fighting in either Jodha Akbar or Asoka's army! Hell to the freaking no! Would I seduce the leaders? HELL YEAH! But will I fight a losing war? HELL NO! I would be those soldiers that would lie down and feign death until it's over. So if I could do that (shame shame on me! TUFF TUFF) you think I wont walk away from this? HA!
P.S. If the news is incorrect then please overlook this entire post and welcome me back in! 🤣
Regards
SamiraTheToiletQueen!
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Pyaar Kii Ye Ek Kahaani
