Bekaraar - FF | suspended - Page 21

She left the place while the woman figure that was hiding behind the door of the room hid just to make sure she was not seen by anyone. She let out a sigh knowing no one noticed her eavesdropping their conversation. She was happy but sad too.

"Matlab.. had hoti hai!!! Unhone toh theek se suna bhi nahi jo Zoya baaji ne bola. Huff! This is so so soo not good. Ab in dono ko kaun samjhaaye, ki ye ek dusre se kitni mohabatt karte hain. Arh!!!" The girl huffed and went away from there but their conversation was playing in her mind again and again.

Just as she saw Dilshaad, she knew she could make them confess with the help of her.

***

"Badi Ammi!!!!" Nuzhat came running and hugged her badi ammi tightly.

"Arey arey kya hua?" Asked Dilshaad as she took a hold of her hands which were presently wrapped around her neck from back.

"Ammi Bhaijaan is in love!!!" she squealed happily as she hugged her from back tightly.

Dilshaad tightened her grip around her as a tear fell down from her eyes while a smile played upon on her lips.

"Oh, and did he admitted it?" she asked giving her a short smile.

"Nahi! Aapko pata hai, bhaijaan and Zoya baaji, they both were in a room. Baaji unknowingly told bhaijaan that she loves him and bhaijaan ne us baat pe gaur bhi nahi farmaaya! Aapko pata hai, they both are so so so confused about their feelings" huffed Nuzhat.

Dilshaad smiled and replied "I know."

"You know badi aami?"

"Yes I do."

"Kya baat chal rahi hai ammi?" asked Najma as she joined them.

"Wohi jo hum har baar karte hain!" Dilshaad and Najma let out a laugh while Nuzhat watched them confused.

"Arey itni confuse na ho. We both already knew about this."

"Oh.."

***

Next day, Asad left for office quite early as he wanted to have a break with all of it.

"Kyun mujhe is Akdu aadmi se itni mohobaat hai?"

"Kyun is Akdu aadmi ke bina ek pal bhi guzaara nahi jaata mujhse?"

"Kyun jab main kisi musibat mein hoti toh mere dil mein ye umeed rehti hai ki aap aayenge?"

"Kyun aapka dukh mujhe dekha nahi jaata?"

"Why does my heart goes erratic when you are near me?"

"Why does my heart can't stay without you?"

"Kyun meri dhadkane badhti hain jab aap mere paas aate ho?"

"Kyun jab aap mereko ignore karte hain tab mujhe bura lagta hai?"

Her words were ringing in his mind, giving it a quite head-ache. He rubbed his forehead, pressing it up with his fingers, thinking it would by any how reduce the pain but it only increased. It wasn't that he didn't hear her saying it. He god damn heard it very clearly! But he can't do it. Every moment when he made up his mind to let it all out to zoya, the same feeling, his insecurity comes in between. How is he to work that out? Every… every single time he thought he would confess his love to her, his past, his ammi's cries, the hard time, comes in0front of his eyes.

All these years, he had closed himself up in such a hard shell that it was way too difficult for him to confess his feelings up to him, leave about her. All he ever wanted to do was, run away. Run away from this damn feeling, run away from every single thing. But the irony was, he can't run away from her. He wants to push her away from his life, he doesn't want to hurt her by making her come close to him, but he is hurting her by every action of hers. Every single action!

He returned late at home that day, suffering from a head-ache. He directly went into his room and lamed the door shut, scaring every person who was still awake. Dilshaad look up at her son's room and left for it. "I surely need to give him a piece of mind!" she thought.

There asad laid, on his bed massaging his forehead. He went to his cupboard and took out a pill and gulp it down. He heard a knock and saw the room door opening slowly. He just wished that it won't be zoya as he was already pissed off like hell! He saw dilshaad entering his room. He sighed as he went back to put the belongings at the right place.

"Asad?" dilshaad called out for him.

"Ji ammi?" he replied, his back facing her.

"Mujhe tumse kuch baat karni hai. Kar sakte hain?"

"Ammi, aap jaanti hain aapko merese baat karne ke liye puchne ki zarurat nahi hai. Boliye, kya baat hai? Everything is fine na?" he asked trying to act normal.

"Nahi Asad… kuch theek nahi hai." A tear dropped from her eyes.

Asad turned back just to see a tear trickle down his mother's eyes.

"Ammi… kya hua hai?" he asked.

"Nahi dekh paa rahi main ye sab aura sad. Apne hi bte ko roz ghut ghut kar jeete hue nahi dekh paar rahi hun main!"

"Ammi ye aap kya keh rahi hain?"

"Asad! You love her. Don't you?" asked Dilshaad.

"Maine unse mohabbat nahi karta Ammi aur na hi main kabhi kisi se mohabbat kar sakta hun." He spoke out as a small tear flowed down his eyes.

Luckily his back was facing her so she didn't saw it.

"Jhut, sab jhut! Kab tak apne aap se bhaago ge asad? Kab tak apni insecurities ko apni khushiyon ke beech aane doge tum? You love her. You are not accepting it just because you are scared that she will have just the same future I had once. Right asad?"

"Ammi main kisi se pyaar karne ke laayak nahi hun. Please is baat ko yahin khatam kar dijiye."

"Tumne ab tak Rashid ko maaf nahi kiya hai na Asad?"

Rashid was just passing by, when he heard these words. He stopped in his tracks to listen what was now coming up for him.

"Maaf? Kaise maaf kardun main unhe ammi? Main manta hun ki razia ne unka faayeda uthaaya, par wo ye tab tak nahi kar sakti thi jab tak unka shireen ke saath koi sambandh hi na hota. Wo ayaan ko ghar leke aaye, mujhe meri zindagi ki sabse badi khushi di, par ammi usi samay (time) pe unhone aapko aapki zindagi ka sabse kadwa sach dikhaaya. Factory mein toh unhone bahut time baad aag lagaayi thi aami, nijma ke paida hone ke baad, par aapki zindagi mein toh aag unhone usi din laga di thi jis dis unhone aapko dhoka diya! Nahi ammi, main unhe factory jalaane ke liye maaf kar sakta hun, par aapko dhoke dene ke liye… kabhi nahi! Main unhe maaf nahi kar paaunga ammi. I'm sorry!."

With this, asad barked out of his room as Rashid hid and a few tears trickled down his eyes.

"Asad…" dilsaad's voice faded away as she saw her son going away in anger. Zoya who saw him leaving went behind him, informing dilshaad that she will take care of it all.

Asad took his car and drove it away aimlessly while zoya took a axi and asked the driver to follow him up. He stopped his car near the place where he and zoya wished that they fell in love with the person completely opposite to them. This was one such place which somehow always used to calm him down whatever the situation maybe. He went and sat on the bench, his head buried under his hands.

Zoya came and sat next to her. She kept a hand on his shoulder as he looked up at her face. He hugged her tight crying his heart out while she caressed his hairs trying to soothe him down.

"Asad… shhh what happened?" she tried her best to soothe him down but nothing helped but he finally let it out, "I hate him Zoya.. I hate him soo much."

He rested his head on her lap as she caressed his hairs continuously.

"I know asad. Jo unhone kiya wo sahi nahi tha but hum apne past ko pakad ke nahi baith sakte hamesha. We have to let go off it one day. Let go off it so that we could move on, live our life. You know how much you hurt people just because you didn't let your past go away." Zoya spoke out as a tear trickled down her eyes and fell on asad's cheek. He sat up only to see her eyes brimming with tears.

He cupped her face and wiped away those tears which were flowing down her doe shaped eyes and pulled her into a tight hug yet again.

"Im soo soo soo sorry zoya!" said asad as his grip tightened around her.

"It's okay asad. We should leave now. Phuphi was soo tensed about you."

They both left the place, with each one having a step closer to their story.

***

Asad smiled now knowing what she felt for him. He just need a signal and here he got a clear one! And in no way he is going to let go off it!

He went in his room, fully prepared to let out his feelings to her. This time, not backing off from it.

***

He knocked her room's door and waited for her to reply. As he heard zoya asking him to come, he did. She just came out of the washroom, dressed up looking as beautiful as ever.