OS: Oops! On the Beach? [16+] Note - Pg 19

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PhoenixRadar

@PhoenixRadar

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#51

Originally posted by: Meself
My like button isn't working and even after abusing it for so long I'm unable to put my like up there. And man! you should be shot. Here I am, whose 12th boards are starting from tomorrow, trying to calm my stressed brain and you come up with something sensual and exciting such as this? Meri padhai toh ho gai!!! And geez what's with the cliffhanger? Continue or else my brain gonna rip apart!!

🤣 Aww... my baby is going through some stress then, eh? What the?! You're exams are starting today? *choking on my water* Sheesh! Why didn't you tell me, you nutcase?😲 All the Best yaar! And why on Earth so early, eh? Shouldn't it start after a few more days like on 7th or 8th? 😕

Don't worry, exams ke baad fulfill karle apni "hunger" ko!😆

yeah, I know! The LIKE button just gets on my nerves! 😡 Stupido, Idiota!!

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PhoenixRadar

@PhoenixRadar

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#52

Originally posted by: _Oishi_
haww...whats this..u will continue right?

Nope, I won't! 🤔 Come on yaar! How can I leave my two most fav characters hanging like that, eh?? Stupido question, I say! 😆

this is not done..how can u leave it like this..not fair :(
you'll have to continue...BAS

Aur Oishi Maalkin ne apna Hukum chala diya!! Hukum ki tameel ho!!!! *shouting at the top of my voice* *cough cough* You gotta be my medicine man later, if I lose my voice, damn it! 😆

And wow..u have amazing writing skill..loved it

Thankoo, Oishi!!

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PhoenixRadar

@PhoenixRadar

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#53

Originally posted by: Eternal1234
oh...loved it ...it was awesome and breath taking continue soon...

Thanks, Eternal!

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PhoenixRadar

@PhoenixRadar

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#54

OH MI GOD!!!! Pehle pyaar dekha, ab gussa??😲

Haaye yeh nakhre, hum toh bas mar hi jaaye agar aap sab na hote humaari zindagi mein!

Jannat toh dikhaadi aapne, aur hum ne bhi vahin aap sabke saath kiya, par Jahnam ka raasta itni jaldi khulega humko nahi pata thha!

Khair, hum toh aapko uss Jahnam ki ore leke jaa rahe hain, jiski har lakeer pe sirf Jannat hi hain!

Hope this all made sense! 😳

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PhoenixRadar

@PhoenixRadar

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#55

Moved to Page 13!

Annie😳

Edited by PhoenixRadar - 12 years ago

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-Fizzi-

@-Fizzi-

Dazzler

+ 6

Posted: 12 years ago

#56

You reserved. You reserved. You reserved.

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PhoenixRadar

@PhoenixRadar

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#57

Originally posted by: -Fizzi-
You reserved. You reserved. You reserved.

so should I like it or not? Or like it after you unreserve it, eh?😆

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644078

Suspended

Posted: 12 years ago

#58

Awww sherni,its so nice of u to mention my name,this os is simply awesome n creative...thumbs up for it...

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PhoenixRadar

@PhoenixRadar

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#59

Originally posted by: -playboy-
Awww sherni,its so nice of u to mention my name,this os is simply awesome n creative...thumbs up for it...

Thankoo, Sheru!! 😎 Boring Sunday ko exciting banana thha toh yaheen idea mila! 😛

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Laila Banu

@Laila2009

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#60

Not my cup of tea I'm afraid. A very horny Asad who cannot control himself - cold shower? The treatment of child abuse was written in a sexaulized manner and that was over-the-top. A very disturbing incident and treated very casually and matter-of-factually was very bothersome. She runs a way and stays with her Nana who runs abandoned home for kids? Other fan-fiction writers have eroticism and romance and both characters are likable.

Here, I am neither fond of Zoya or Asad - they seem like two carricatures for the soul purpose of writing some raw sex scenes - Thanks for sharing.