Ek Main Aur Ek Tu
Part 1: Zareen, the Messiah
"Ayaan!" Humaira screamed out.
"Whaaat?" Came distant cry.
Humaira sighed. She would never get him to help her out. He was probably sitting in front of the TV right now, stuffing his face with cheetos. She saw Nikhat walking into the kitchen with a long dupatta trailing by her.
"What's wrong, Humaira?"
"Woh- I'm baby-sitting Ayshya aunty's daughter today." Humaira sighed.
Nikhat smiled. "Aww that cute little baby?! Zareen? Baby-sitting? For what?"
"Trying to make a little more cash." Humaira replied, fidgeting with her dupatta.
"Paise? For what, Humaira? If you need money, just ask your ab-"
"Nahin! Shhh!" Humaira touched her index finger to her lips. "You promise you won't tell anyone?" Humaira looked around, fidgeting with her dupatta again.
"Humaira! What are you hiding from me?!" Nikhat replied, exasperatedly.
"Who- Actually, I wanted to buy a new dress." Humaira looked at the floor. "For Ayaan"
Nikhat giggled. "No offense, but I really doubt my brother's into that."
Humaira gaped at her. "No! I mean for me! To impress him!" Nikhat looked confused.
"But why-?"
Humaira had told Nikhat the entire story involving Nadeem and the chatting. She didn't know if it was possible, but she'd fallen even harder for Ayaan now. But ever since that incident, Ayaan had simply returned to his normal flirtatious behaviour, flirting with every pretty girl around him. She thought her feelings should be obvious for him but clearly they weren't. She wanted to be the girl that Ayaan was looking for so he could fall for her the way she had for him.
"After the Nadeem incident'" Humaira's voice cracked. "Ayaan still hasn't changed. Woh meri tarah dekhte bhi nahin hai."
"Humaira, what does that have to do with clothes?" Nikhat asked.
"Have you seen the girls he chases? They're all the same! Jeans, shirt, the modern types. I can be that for Ayaan! If I go out to buy clothes, ammi will come with me too and how am I supposed to go and buy jeans like that? She'll drop dead on the floor if she sees me in jeans! And I can't just ask her for money either."
"That's true'" Nikhat replied.
"So I'm baby-sitting little Zareen! They just came from America and they're looking for a nanny. Until they find one, they said I can baby-sit her. Ammi doesn't mind!" Humaira squealed, excitedly.
Nikhat cleared her throat. "Your ammi doesn't know you're being paid, does she?"
Humaira pressed her index finger to her lips again, "Shh! Ammi doesn't even know what baby-sitting is! She doesn't need to know!"She giggled.
"Humaira, I think my brother's turning you crazy." Nikhat laughed, gently hitting Humaira's arm.
"He is." Humaira blushed.
The ring of the door bell startled her. "It must be Zareen!" Humaira yelped as she ran out to get the door, only to find Ayaan there, smiling to a pretty lady.
"I'm Ayshya. Nice to meet you." Said the woman in the yellow anarkali. She looked very polished and her English was perfect.
"I'm Ayaan. And who's this little angel?" Ayaan winked at the baby, who of course giggled back. Old or young, Ayaan would flirt with anything if it stayed there long in enough in front of him, Humaira thought, rolling her eyes. She rushed forward.
"Hi, Ayshya aunty! I'm ready for Zareen!" Humaira gave Zareen a warm smile, which unfortunately wasn't returned. Ayaan smirked at her.
"Oh great, Humaira. I'm already late. I have to go to dinner with my husband. He's waiting outside for me right now." The lady rushed and quickly gave her some pink-coloured bags, explaining what was within each one. Diapers, nappies, cotton balls, rash cream, baby powder, baby oil, baby food. After the list was completed, Humaira wasn't sure she had heard anything except the word "baby" properly.
"Great! Don't worry about a thing! I'll make sure Zareen is comfortable! You just go have fun at your dinner!" She beamed. Ayaan raised his eye brows at Humaira, utterly confused.
"Yeah, just not too much fun. She already has six kids." Ayaan muttered as the woman left.
"Shut up, Ayaan! She could have heard that!" Humaira picked up Zareen out of her baby carriage.
"I was serious. Why can't one of her older kids take care of Zareen? Why'd she dump her with you?" Ayaan picked up the bag, walking in after Humaira.
"She didn't dump her. I'm just watching after her. All her older kids are in boarding school somewhere abroad. Denver, I think? Besides, I like babies. And they love me! Right, Zareen?" Humaira smiled at the little baby. As if on cue, Zareen immediately started crying.
"Oh yeah. They sure do love you." Ayaan smiled.
"Ayaan?! Please help me!" Humaira put the baby back in her carriage but she was still crying.
"Me? I'm sorry. I didn't sign up for this. I have things to do. Places to be." Ayaan continued walking.
"Where?" Humaira asked, putting her hands on her waist.
"Um - the park! Exercise is great for everyone!" Ayaan smiled, clearly pretending to stretch his arm.
"Oh, in that case, we'll come too! Humaira gathered the baby bag and lifted Zareen up. "Here, take Zareen. I dunno why she's crying so much. You think she's hungry?"
Ayaan sighed, picking the crying toddler up. "Hello, beautiful." Zareen slowly stopped crying and started smiling at Ayaan. Humaira looked at the two, agape.
"Life is so unfair." She grabbed Zareen's blanket. "Come on, let's go to the park! Yayy." She had a fake enthusiasm to her voice.
"Hey! I said I was going!" Ayaan tried handing Zareen back to Humaira.
"Come on, Ayaan! She likes you! We can show her ducks, and the pond and trees and - I dunno! Park stuff!" Humaira replied.
"Well, I have a better idea! Just turn on the TV! Watch the ducks and trees right here at home!" Ayaan looked back. Humaira was already outside. He sighed. He was hoping to see this cute girl that always walked her dog at the park around this time. No girl would approach him now.
"Ayaan!! Come on, the ducks are waiting for us!" Humaira yelled back at him. She knew he was just going to the park to flirt with some girls. At least this baby was helping her destroy his plans, she grinned. Ayaan sighed as he walked out of the door, walking behind Humaira.
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"Wooohooo!" Ayaan yelled as loud as his lungs would allow.
"Ayaan! What are you doing?" Humaira looked at him, shamefully, trying to hide her face in her dupatta.
"I'm riding a pony!" Ayaan yelled back.
They'd been walking around in the park for 15 minutes. Humaira couldn't get the nerve to ask him on a real date or even talk to him nicely. Every time she'd open her mouth, she'd find him yelling at him or making a sarcastic remark about his jokes. So now they were in the baby park, with Ayaan riding a blue plastic pony with a spring underneath it to keep it wobbly, looking absolutely ridiculous. If someone recognized them, her father would be furious.
"Ayaan! People are looking at you!" Humaira walked up to him, carrying baby Zareen in the carriage.
"Any hot girls?" He winked at her. Her blood boiled. She gulped, hitting him hard. "There are kids waiting for a ride on that pony but they're too scared to approach a scary-looking creature like you!"
"Ouch! Humaira begum! That hurts!" He looked around and finally got off the plastic pony. The whole thing rose a few centimetres as he got up. Humaira giggled. "Fatty." Ayaan rolled his eyes at her, picking Zareen up.
"Wanna go try the slide? I haven't been on that forever!"
"Um no. We're going to get banned from this place, Ayaan! It's for babies! Not unemployed graduates with nothing else to do."
"Okay, fine, the swings?! Come on, Humaira begum! Those were your favourite when you were small!" He pleaded.
"You remember?" She said softly. She loved it when he called her "begum". She felt as if she was really his Begum. There was probably nobody in the world that knew the little things about her like Ayaan did.
"Of course I do!" He tapped his finger on her nose, arching his back slightly so his eyes could meet her's. Humaira looked away.
"What else do you remember?" Humaira asked. They used to pretend to get married under the slides when she was only 6. Even at that age, she had completely lost it for Ayaan. He took care of her like nobody else did, giving her his food, his juice, all her favourite crayons at school during art class. She'd never even noticed another boy in her life besides Ayaan. She just knew they had to end up together. She had no clue what she'd do without him.
"What an adorable little baby!" A young woman, probably in her mid-20s walked up to Ayaan. He looked awe-struck. Stupid jeans girls, Humaira thought.
"She's really cute!" The girl smiled at them.
"And so are you!" Ayaan muttered, ruffling the back of his unruly hair.
Humaira stepped hard on his foot as discretely as she could. "Thank you. Everyone says she looks like me more than her father." Humaira smiled at the lady.
"She does look like you! You're both so cute!" Humaira smiled back at the girl's compliment and wrapped her arm around Ayaan's waist before he could say anything. Needless to say, he was shocked.
"Take care!" Humaira waved bye to the woman. She stuck her tongue out at Ayaan. Ha! Take that, you little Casanova, she thought.
"Um...Humaira? People are watching us."Ayaan fidgeted around.
Humaira removed her hand quickly. "Come on Zareen, let's go." Humaira turned a tomato red. Why did she always get so jealous?! She took the baby carriage and walked away from the slides, towards the swing set. Naturally, she expected Ayaan to follow but when she turned around, Ayaan had disappeared.
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"So he hasn't called either?" Humaira got off on the phone with Nikhat.
Where was Ayaan? She was getting worried now. He wouldn't leave her alone like this in a park with a baby. Especially not days after the Nadeem incident. "Maybe he's in trouble, Zareen." She reached out to lift Zareen out of the baby swings but Zareen crawled away as soon as she was put down.
"Zareen! Wait!" Humaira grabbed the bags again. "Kya museebat hai yeh ladki..." She muttered. She heard the sound of a baby giggling and turned around to find a very cheerful Zareen tugging at Ayaan's jeans.
"Ayaan?! Where on earth were you! I looked everywhere!" Humaira sighed loudly. "How could you leave me like that!" She ran to him, pushing his arm away as Ayaan tried to reach out to Zareen.
"Leaving you wasn't hard. But leaving this gorgeous little one on the other hand'" Humaira had spent the last 15 minutes trying to cheer Zareen up with different toys, her favourite swings and even the sandbox, but Zareen hadn't even smiled once. And now she was giggling away in Ayaan's presence. Obviously, she had some tough competition.
Ayaan sighed looked at Humaira's expression. "Why didn't you just call me?" Ayaan asked. "Arz kiya hai."
Humaira rolled her eyes, awaiting some terrible shayari.
"Aap pyaar toh karti hain, par qubool nahin karti,
Aap pyaar toh karti hain, par qubool nahin karti,
Apni inn nighahon se dhoonte hai, par karti bayaan nahin,
Itni kandjoosi karti Humaira begum,
ke SMS to karti hain app par ek phone call nahin."
Humaira frown slowly turned into a smile and then a giggle. "Pyaar kare meri jhooti!"
"What a cute little baby." A different jeans girl came up to them. Humaira rolled her eyes. What is it with this park and girls? No wonder Ayaan came here to "exercise" so often.
"Oh, we're just watching out for her!" Ayaan exclaimed before Humaira could ruin his chances again. "She's not mine! Not ours. We're just friends." Ayaan explained. "I think she likes you!" Zareen was reaching out to the girl. Humaira fumed. Was there really something wrong with her, she wondered. This baby went to everyone but her!
"Aww, I think so too!" The girl smiled back at Ayaan. Suddenly, a large sound of flatulence erupted. The girl looked shocked, looking at Ayaan.
"That wasn't me! She probably had too many beans or something. Baby food these days!" Ayaan chuckled nervously. The girl gave a weak smile as she walked away.
Humaira waited until she was completely gone before falling apart laughing. "Loser! Serves you right for using a baby to get girls! Ha!" She whacked him.
"Aww, Zareen. Did you get jealous like my Humaira begum always does? Why did you have to fart in front of the pretty girl? Fart in Humaira's face next time!" Ayaan said to Zareen, sarcastically.
"Excuse me?! I do not get jealous of your stupid girls! And they don't like you. They like the baby, who by the way looks like she's going to drop another bomb on you."
"Yuck!" Ayaan scrunched his nose. "Humaira, change her diaper!"
Humaira took a smelly Zareen from Ayaan. She felt her phone vibrate. "Ayaan, hold her a second, I think her mom's calling." Ayaan inched away but held Zareen at a distance.
"Hello? Hi, aunty!" Humaira put on her sing-song voice. "Yeah, everything is great! Zareen's having a blast!"
"Oh yeah...She's blasting alright,"Ayaan said sarcastically, keeping his nose as far away from the baby as he could.
"You want to talk to her? Oh - um. Sure!" Humaira put her phone on speaker and waited for Zareen to say something. "Zareen, it's your ammi! Say hi!" Humaira said, a little over-excitedly. Zareen looked at Humaira, uninterested and went back to tugging at Ayaan's beard.
After 3 seconds of an awkward silence, Humaira mouthed, "Do something!" to Ayaan.
"Ooh-ooh-ah-ah!" Ayaan replied in his baby-talk voice. Humaira raised her eyebrows.
Humaira cleared her throat. "Um, I'm sure she's just tired from playing." She explained. "Oh sure, don't worry. Zareen will be fine with us for another hour. You have fun! Bye!" Humaira put the phone back in her purse.
"What?! I'm not taking care of this odour-emitting thing for another hour!" Ayaan said, lifting Zareen away from him.
"So when I said, 'do something,' I meant to the baby, not for you to act like a monkey." Humaira took Zareen. "Get the diaper bag, Ayaan."
"Where is it?" He asked, looking around.
"I dunno, probably by the swings. It's this little pink bag." Humaira replied.
"Um - Humaira begum. There's nothing there!" Ayaan looked around the swing set and walked around the trees as well but saw no pink bag.
"Check carefully! It has to be!" Humaira walked to him briskly. He was right; there was no pink bag anywhere to be seen. Who would steal a diaper bag?!
"Ayaan - " She said slowly, "How are we going to change her diaper without her diaper bag?!! Her mother is going to kill me! Humaira plopped herself down in the sandbox with smelly Zareen.
Ayaan sighed. He should have just stayed home. "Humaira, it's okay. I'm the oldest. I shouldn't have left you two at all. I should be more responsible. I'm expected to be." Ayaan tried to soothe her, placing his arms around her petite frame.
"Ayaan, nobody expects you to be responsible." Humaira sniffed, smelling his cologne.
Ayaan snickered at her joke. "You know what? Let's go buy some diapers! Wanna come to the supermarket with me, Humaira begum?" He winked at her, holding out his hand.
Humaira looked up at his goofy lopsided smile and melted all over again. Sure, diaper-hunting wasn't really a date, but she'd take it over him ogling at all the other girls in the park! "I'd love to!"
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Part 1
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