||VIVISI AT#45||Only Hero You'll Ever Crave|| - Page 75

Girl- Today i was cooking chicken, when i added HARA DHANIYA, guess what happened.

Boy- Pata nahi, tum batao

Girl- Chicken start dancing and singing "HUM PE YE KISNE HARA RANG DAALA…MAAR DAALA-ALLAAHH…

A woman wanted to reach her husband on his mobile phone but discovered that she was out of credit; she instructed her son – to use his own phone to pass across an urgent message to daddy who is at site.

After junior had called, he got back to mummy to inform her that it was a ladythat picked up daddy's phone the three times he tried reaching dad on the mobile.

She waited impatiently for her husband to return from site, immediately she sighted him, she gave him a very hot slap, while the man was trying to ask why?

She repeated the slap, people from neighborhood rushed around to know the cause of this.

The man asked junior to tell everybody what the lady said to him when he called,
Junior said "the number u are trying to call is not reachable".

Chota Santa stopped by the corner grocery store and read the following list to the Sabji wala:

10 kilo sugar at Rs 1.25 a kilo
4 kilo coffee at Rs1.50 a kilo
2 kilo butter at Rs1.10 a kilo
2 bars soap at Rs0.83 each

"How much does that come to?" asked Larry.

"Twenty-two rupees and thirty-six paisa."

"If I gave you three ten rupee bills, how much change would I get?" said Chota Santa.

"Seven rupees and sixty-four paisa," stated the Sabji wala who appeared to be irritated by all the questions.

Chota Santa said, as he disappeared through the door, "Mujhe ye sab nahi kharid ne ka he.. mujhe to bas apne kal ke math homework ka an"

During an English lesson, the teacher notices that a boy was not paying attention to him.

Teacher:Pappu, join these two sentences together. I was cycling to school. I saw a dead body.

Pappu: (thinking for a while) I saw a dead body cycling to school.

A teacher once asks all students to write an essay on the topic "A Poor Family". One student gets the lowest marks for writing that essay . The student happens to be the richest girl in the entire class and her essay goes on as…

She writes :

Ek baar ek bahut hee gareeb family thi, husband aur wife dono gareeb they, doo bachey they, woh bhi bahut gareeb they!!!

Ghar ke saare naukar bhi gareeb they, ghar ka maali, driver aur guard bhi bahut gareeb they, ghar ke 4 kuttey bhi gareeb they, 2 din sey chicken nahi khaaya tha, 3 mercedeez car thi,
unki bahut time se servicing nahi hui thi, ghar ka A.C bhi theek nahi chalta tha, ghar mein 1 saal sey paint nahi hua tha family ko holiday ke liye foreign country gaye bhi 6 mahiney ho gaye they, ghar ke 5 mein sey 2 TV to chaltey hee nahi they, all in all, bahut he gareeb family thi!!!!!

A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th grade class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water,a glass of whiskey and two worms.

"Now, class. Observe closely the worms," said the professor putting a worm first into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be.

The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed painfully, and quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail.

"Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?" the professor asked.

Shyam, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded, "Drink whiskey and you won't get worms."

Beta papa se: Papa main itna bada kab ho jaunga ki mummy se bina poochey ghar se bahar ja sakoo.

Papa thandi saans lete hue: Beta, itna bada toh abhi main bhi nahi hua hoon.