swaron os : loving him was red ...
heyloo sablog , i had written this long back for the 100th AT , emotional os is something i have tried after so long , dont noe how it has turned out , plzz do leave ur reviews n suggetions for improvement 😳.so here is the OS .
Meri dream gal sirf mere dreams mein hi hai , kyuki real life mein mai ek weakling hun ek looser hun , tumhare life ka mazaak hun ...mere life ka mazaak hun .
Yahi truth hai Sharon ...tumhe jo karna tha tumne kar diya , bina yeh soche ki isske baad kya hoga...aur vahi hua jo itne saalo se hota aa raha hai swayam shikhawat mazaak ban gaya phir se aur voh isske liye kyuki voh tumse pyar karta hai ...paagalo ki tarha ...
No no no Sharon agar tum mujhse pyar karti toh aaj jab mauka tha toh sabke saamne mujhe reject kar diya...phirse
Mere pyar ko accept karne se ghabra gayi thi , yaa fir apne image kharaab hone se dar gayi thi ...bina soche samjhe mujhe reject kar diya just like before , ek baar bhi yeh nahi socha ki jise tum chahti ho no m sorry... m sorry jise tum chup chup ke cahne ka claim karti thi use log kya kahenge looser desparate jo apne aap ko tumpar thop raha hai .
Aur uss ayesi hi baat ne hamari life ka saach samne laya hai , aur voh yeh hai ki ...mai tumhe jitna bhi chahu tum meri nahi ho sakti..tumhari nature mein mujhe reject karna hai ...mujhse galti hogayi ki maine tumse itna sab kuch expect kiya ..m sorry ...
M sorry ki mai tumme mai voh trust nahi laa paya m relly sorry
Yahi sach hai ...mere paanch saal ke pyar ko tumne paanch second mein sabke saamne jootha saabit kar diya ...yahi sach hai
No Sharon no ...no Sharon no bohot der ho chuki hai Sharon ...
Those words rang around her head , banged her inner ego n sank into her body n soul as she walked to the college after that shattering convo .
Sha : why ... why god why , kyu maine usske saath ayesa kiya , kyu swayam kyu mai har baar naa chate hue bhi tumhe hurt kar jaati hun , kyu mai hamare relation mein koi na koi naye problem ka unintentionally reason ban jaati hun kyu ! tumhari galti hai sharon its u n its always u ...har baar use yeh feel karvana ki voh tumhari life mein koi importance nahi rakhta , har baar usski dream girl banne ki jagha usske dreams todna ,aur har baar yeh point prove kar dena ki ussne tumse pyar karke apne life ki sabse badi mistake kar di hai , swayam ... thik hi toh kaha ussne maine ayise hi ham dono ki life ka mazaak bana diya . now wat ! now wat ! theres nothing left in your life na koi relationship na koi hope, na swayam...
Loving him is like driving a new Maserati down a dead-end street
Faster than the wind, passionate as sin ending so suddenly
Loving him is like trying to change your mind once you're already flying through the free fall
Like the colors in autumn, so bright just before they lose it all...
Losing him was blue like I'd never known
Missing him was dark grey all along
Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you never met
But loving him was red
Loving him was red
She eventually reached college to collect her stuff from locker room n then head towards her house , but as she crossed the rehearsal hall a flow of memories flashed her eyes she felt numb,her heart pounced harder , her innerself earged for his presence , aur yeh khalish jo thi voh khamakha nahi .
How could I forget that day when my heart approved for his love n company at the same tym my mind commanded me to push him away wid the fear of losing myself over him . his every move declared his rite over her me, his every stop declared that u belong to me n i will not let u go away till u engrave my love widin u .i flowed wid him as if carried away by wind , a wind which was soothing but misty ,its was not that I did not try to avoid getting lost in his deep love , but all in vain. my resistance persisted me n my soul could not keep away from his presence . oh how right full were u swayam , n today mai khud tumhare pass aarhai hun n u say its too late ...
Touching him was like realizing all you ever wanted was right there in front of you
Memorizing him was as easy as knowing all the words to your old favorite song
Fighting with him was like trying to solve a crossword and realizing there's no right answer
Regretting him was like wishing you never found out that love could be that strong...
Sha : do I need to be alone , do I have be alone , no the fact is that I deserve to be alone .
As she walked up the terrace well known as their wanna be alone place . was she alone , no his memories couldn't leave her as she revived their soulfull togetherness .maula mere kyu tumne usse mujh mein panha di , di toh kyu ayese juda ki . bata maula mere bata!
his dark orbs made me drool over him , his arms gave me comfort , his touch soothed me , his closeness made me feel as if no one could have such right over my senses .as his hand moved down my hands i loved his touch , as his hands carressed her hair I could feel his care , as his hands griped her waist I could feel his strength . his breath stormed her inner self n i couldnt stop, but let go ,myself wid him .just let go... oh how magical were u swayam n now dere nothing between us rather than worst feeling loneliness .
Remembering him comes in flashbacks and echoes
Tell myself it's time now, gotta let go
But moving on from him is impossible
When I still see it all in my head
Burning red
Loving him was red
she couldn't take it anymore , resisting him was making her more contagious towards his love which had turned into a dreadfull disease by now . she started making her way towards her house , walking on the empty road , just as empty as the page of her life was at that moment , near by a chai tappri had a song playing on the radio , as the lyrics of the song struck her ears the pages of this book flipped back to the tym when this book had just started to reopen after being shut for long time . chura liya tha ussne mujhe aapne aap se hi aur aaj khud mujhse nazree chura raha hai , badal ke meri yun zindegani aaj khud badla gaya hai voh .
soft bliss , those turning flips , his approach so rite , I couldn't denie at the site . being wid him was always so right but my ego over powered it but that day it changed his love had changed me to some extent that I felt so correct being wid him , for him ,by him . a moment came when my uncertainity raised n I tried to back off but he blew them away wid a grab of wrist , putting my fist over his neck , n I was back wid that feeling of correctness , his arms r my owned bog just meant to slack down n down in his love . oh how correct were u swayam n how wrong have I always been making our hum ending up at tum aur mai...
Oh, losing him was blue like I'd never known
Missing him was dark grey all along
Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you never met
'Cause loving him was red
She opened entered her house as she exited from those memories .
Sha : errr tum yaha ho tum vaha ho jaha dekhti hun bass tumhara chera tumhari yaadein tumhari baatein bas tum hi nazar aate ho kyu ... har moment bas yahi soch soch ke thak gayi hoon ki kash ...kash ek second ke liye soch liya hota ek baar apne aap ko kaabu kar leti bass ek baar tumse keh deti ki tumse kitna pyar karti hoon toh ... N suddenly she started panting n coughing hard , she ran to search asthama pump n oozed her attack down . kyu tum mujhe itna effect karte ho kyu mere man mein bas chuke swayam , yeh kaisa jeena hai tumhare bina . tears ran down her eyes n that revelation came across her eyes . how painfull was pushing him away n now how painful is earging for him , how painful .
at first I gave it a sensuous approach . my moves conveyed my affection towards you .i fell for you , I drooled over you ,i danced for you .as you joined me we sizzled the floor together. in n out i danced ,i danced till my body catched the rhythm , till my heart listened to the music , till my breath followed every movement but finally I thrashed down , u came to support me but i pushed u away , far away coz i knew dat something that binds us close at very first is our dance n if dance does not exist between us we r empty .i ran towards the bitter truth of my life n lets it out for our saviour ,for staying away from your love , for it was you whole n sole rite to noe .but tumne shatter down hone se zyada mujhe support karna prefer kiya . 'hum kuch sochenge , hum nahi mai ' .my burning heart spoke it out ,I had to confesse the truth n declare my loneliness for lifetime .'mere life ka truth tumhare samne hai , mere life ki stress tumhare samne hai ,aur mai apni life mein iise zyada aur kuch include nahi kar sakti ' .hearing this I knew u couldnt give me more pain .'i noe ki tum mujhe apni life ka stress samajhti ho ,god noes maine kitni koshish ki ,kitni koshish ki mai tumhari iss feeling ko reverse kar saku , i guess i failed ,mai tumhe aur stress nahi dunga , apne aapko impose... , apne aapko impose nahi karunga , past mein karne ke liye i m sorry , i..m so...sory sha..mai tumhe aur taklif nahi dunga . tum break up chati thi naa , so here it is . tumhare liye kuch bhi sharon kuch bhi ...oh how faithfull were u swayam that mere liye hampe forcefully give up kar diya , n aaj tumne firse give up kar diya kitne aasani se keh diya ki tum aur mai kabhi ham nahi ho sakte.
she sobbed hard rewinding those memories .her life had changed their ways changed their modes changed their colours .
his love was as red as blood
his touch was as red as rose
his anger was as red as fire
kissing him was as red as apple
his presence was as red as evening sky
being wid him was as red as spring .
'Cause loving him was red
Yeah, yeah, red
We're burning red
And that's why he's spinnin' 'round in my head
Comes back to me, burning red
Yeah, yeah
His love was like driving a new Maserati down a dead-end street...
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