SS- (CAGED!) Chapter 5: let me go...page 20 - Page 8

Originally posted by: chicksoup

😆

Thanx. I just realised one thing. All of U guys hate heartbreak, and I am putting U thru just that!😃😆

yes v hate heart break ...bahut nazuk dil h hamaara ...jaldi toot jaata h

Your story is wonderful, and so far, I completely agree with your portrayal of how Zoya feels. Can't wait for your next update - so beautifully written :)

That was so beautiful...
Asad wants the old Zoya back but I don't think after such an experience there can be an old Zoya...
Zoya doesn't want to be a part of Asad n his life... he'll be heartbroken hearing that...
As Dilshad said let time do its magic...

Story so far:

Asad comes to take Zoya home, on the night of Nikhat's nikah, and she goes with him silently.

Zoya is affected by the triviality of the women's lives around her, including her own...and she tells phoophi that she wants to stay just a daughter, always.

3. I, me, myself

Asad glanced impatiently towards Zoya's door. It was 10 in the morning. He had badly wanted to catch her today morning, and he was running late. He had peeped in, a little late in the night, hoping to get hold of her...and had been pleasantly surprised to find her sleeping, hugging his Ammi. There was so much warmth in that room, it had filled his heart. He had faint idea what went through Zoya's mind as she returned, but to find her making a home in his house, had elated him. And for the first time, since that fateful night, he had slept peacefully.

Dilshad looked at Asad drumming his fingers and looking at his watch. She did not have the heart to tell him what Zoya had broken to her the night before. She knew he would hear it sooner or later, and it was better Zoya and Asad sorted this out between themselves. She was there to offer support to both her children.

"Ammi, I have an appointment I cannot cancel. Please tell Zoya I will be home for lunch. We have not talked..." The latter part came out a bit reluctantly, but it had been a long time since she had heard even this amount of cheerfulness in his voice. Asad gave one final look towards Zoya's direction, and left disappointed. He knew he had a lot to make up for, and he wanted to start as soon as possible. He'd cancel his afternoon appointments and spend some time with her. He would beg for forgiveness that he did not deserve, and promise her a lifetime of happiness that he would kill himself to fulfil. He'd make all her dreams, all her wishes come true...and it would be nothing compared to what she had done for him.

Zoya stared down at the laptop...- Women in India'...she had been gazing numbly at the screen for the past one hour. It was not anything new. She had been interested in the plight of women in India, ever since Jeeju's cousin brought his Indian bride to NY. She had been only few years older to Zoya, and had told her about the stories back home...of how the girl child was discriminated against from her mother's womb. She had been thankful she was born and raised in a country where women's equality was not just in paper. That had ignited a concern for the Girl Child cause, something she had wanted to take up at the end of her search in India...

And where was that Zoya now?

All that was left of her was a shadow...of a man whom she chose to trust blindly, swallowing her pride...her ideals...her individuality...all for trading away another woman to an uncertain future...

Was this love? Did love demand? If it demanded, would it be love anymore? She was confused and sad...she thought about Mr. Khan- what he had meant to her a month back...and what he meant to her now. It scared her that her heart still responded when she thought about him...where it had gone fluttering once, now it was filled with sadness and heaviness. But he affected her, and she was not sure how much more of this she could take.

When had the independent Zoya let go of her identity, and shamelessly clung onto the safety a man offered? An illusion of safety? Or safety at the cost of her originality?

He had been there for her ...always...except when it mattered the most. He had flung her into the darkest abyss she had known, and it was difficult to not believe it could happen again. She did not deny the fact that he loved her, that he felt bad for her...for her whole ordeal. But what was love to a man?

She knew Rashid Ahmed Khan was a decent man...yet he had given her Phoophi a lifelong of tears...and he claimed to love her still.

She had come in search of a man who must have loved her mother enough to make her come after him...allowing her to perish in a foreign land...had he even looked back for her? These were the harsh realities Mr. Khan himself tried to point out to her once before. Tears stung her eyes as Zoya remembered a Zoya and Asad who had not known those harsh realities. There had once existed a man who was a god to her...and that god had turned into an enforcer...punishing her for a crime she had committed in innocence. Had she deserved it?

She sighed at her indecisiveness. The man obviously still meant a lot to her. And she knew she would find it in her to forgive him- if not today, tomorrow. But would she ever forget?

Hum dono ek doosre se bahut alag hai, Ms. Farooqui...'- Of course. Now the words made more sense. She was from a different world altogether, would never fit into his scheme of things. He was a man willing to pamper her, at the cost of subjugation...as was probably every man out here in this country. He was raised in a society that taught that women had to be subdued, treated as second class citizens or rather not even that. Most of the women around her were simply ornate extensions of the men who dominated them...and they seemed happy living that life- because they had not known another life.

Mr. Khan had been right all along. She'd never be the right person for him no matter how they felt attracted to each other, because she would never surrender her spirit...and he would never stop demanding it. It was simply their natures that would go against each other, were they to continue further Had fate taken this step to show her what her future would be like? Before it turned all the more an ugly twist in a love story?

Her thoughts were clearer now. It was tough. But she knew she had to be firm. If the mystifying gravitation she still felt towards Mr. Khan was anything to go by, Zoya knew she'd have to fight herself more than she fought him.

For now, she needed a distraction, desperately.

Zoya had changed by the time Dilshad thought about checking in on her. It was way past Zoya's breakfast time, and she had wanted to make sure she did not miss it.

She watched attentively as Zoya grabbed a bite, hugged her absentmindedly, and made towards the door with Phoophi, I am going out. I will be back by afternoon...'

At least, the tears had dried.

PS:

I am so sorry about the late update.😳 Whenever I was not busy, I was drooling over the episodes😳😆...Hoping to get more regular now.

Asad should get to know what's going thru her mind...I just wanted a chapter on why Zoya would decide to stay away from him...hoping to update the next chapter soon.

Thank U all for the encouraging words...🤗

Nice update...Loved the way u put down the feelings of distress,anger and confusion of Zoya!Yes she will forgive him bt can never forget wat she has gone through those days without him...

Omg I love all the angst ! Please pm me when you update 😳

Soup you finally updated! Don't take too long next time please 😆


Zoe's plight saddens me D; Well so does Asad's but Zoe's more so. I loved that line you wrote about her spirit and how the man was demanding and how she couldn't take it.

I kinda wish your story plays out in the show but alas we'll have to settle for watching Zoe be a hero again 😆

Great update! (:

Very interesting plz PM me once u update and update soon😃