I'm not being modest--this is COMPLETE and UTTER shit. I was having the IPK feels and wrote this. Again it's COMPLETE and UTTER shit. Read at your own risk. Your IQ may drop a few points afterwards.
AsYa Hunt for Balwant Kaur
Sariyan bibiyan ayiyan,
Balwant Kaur na ayi,
O te kendi si main baara baje avangi,
Ethe vaj gaya dhai,
Balwant Kaur na ayi.
-Raizade Haramzade (and Co.)
"Why are you crying baby, look monkey!" Zoya tried to calm her four year old down.
"Good morning," he walked into the baby room.
"Morning? It's bloody morning!" Zoya flashed her bloodshot red eyes.
"Woah, easy there you look--"
"--like crap. I know. Yes, baby look Curious George!" she went back to her little Asya.
"Mommy!! I- I-"
"Yes baby what do you want?"
"I WANT BALWANT KAUR!!!" She wailed, "She said she'd be here at 12 but she never came! I waited for her till 2:30!!"
At this point Zoya lost it. A sleep deprived Zoya meant a not-in-the-right-frame-of-mind Zoya.
"ASAD!"
"Yes love,"
"GO FIND BALWANT KAUR!"
"Huh?"
"Yes baby, I'll find her for you," she cooed Asya and went back to her horrifying reserved for her hubby voice, "I DON'T CARE HOW, BUT YOU ARE GOING TO FREAKIN FIND THAT TARDY BALWANT KAUR FOR ME OR YOU'LL GO FIND ME SOME DIVORCE PAPERS!"
"Bab-"
"Listen," she grabbed his collar, "You have NO IDEA what's it's like to not sleep for twenty. eight. f**king. hours."
"Of course! One Balwant Kaur it is! Would you like that with a side of fries?"
"SHUT UP! I just knew it! We'll find Balwant Kaur ourselves! Let's go baby!" She picked little Asya up in her arms.
His two little angels would no doubt get themselves in trouble. He decided it would be wiser to just help them find that goddamn Balwant Kaur who never showed up. No one made a promise to his Asya and then broke it. Shit just got personal.
***
After hours of door to door queries, Zoya and Asya stopped to get some Bread Pakoras. Little did they know they were constantly being followed by Asad Miyan himself, however he took the smarter route and decided to follow in his car.
After his stomach grumbled for the 7th time, he decided it was time to blow his cover and enjoy some Bread Pakoras himself.
"Abu aap yahan?"
"Asya we don't talk to strangers," Zoya gave him 'the look' and let him face her back.
"Pyaari begam, ab ghussa thook do. And anyways Balwant Kaur milli?"
"No, but we found a Balbeer Kaur, Bahira Kaur, Bageshri Kaur, Beena Kaur, and a Baharak Kaur. I didn't know we had so many B-Kaurs around here," she bit into her pakora.
"How 'bout this, I'll just call Aman and ask him to search for this Balwant Kaur?"
"Aman? I thought your secretary's name was Sheena,"
"Yeah but Sheena took a maternity leave and Arnav Singh Raizada, a good friend of mine, decided to let me use his right hand man for a few months till Sheena comes back,"
"Does Aman even exist?"
"Sorry?"
"Nothing, a random fan-girl question that jumped into the middle of a fictional story. Forget I said that, continue,"
"Confused ladki," he muttered under his breath, "Hello Aman? Aman, I need you to do some intensive research on 'Balwant Kaur' and find out who and where she is. She promised to come visit my daughter at 12 yesterday, and she never came."
"No, she said she'll try to come back at 12 with the rest of her toys,"
"Aman kya bak rahe ho?"
"Look, on Wednesday you asked me to send the toys you bought for Asya home, but I got busy so I asked my wife to do it, but she forgot one of the boxes at home and said she'll try to bring the rest at 12 tomorrow but them by son Babloo got diarrhea and she couldn't."
"Huh?"
"You're asking about my wife right? Balwant Kaur?"
_____________________________
I don't even know.
-Shweta
Cricket
Kumkum Bhagya
Tum Se Tum Tak
Sampoorna
124