Retro Thread/Daastan Ke Dhaage: Aarti & Dubeys

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Zetter

@Zetter

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#31

@Samana: I hear what you're saying if only Shobha did give P that reassurance he was looking for that no matter what happens with Aarti he will always have her love...I do remember that hotel scene where he wanted to tell Shobha the truth only to fall prey to taiji's manipulation cause he thought she was doing it for his own good not realizing that giving into her fantasy that Aarti was still his wife which wasn't the case.

The Dubeys did talk about getting Prashant remarried, I think that Shobha said that they will start to look for the girl after they help Aarti with her in-laws IMO that what made P more angrier that he always came second to Aarti in Shobha's eyes when all he ever wanted was for her to look at him the way she does Aarti and then Yash.

Prashant was insecure and Shobha knowingly or unknowingly just make it worse

@Caller: Well Prashant did say that Aarti did him no favours as Ansh was his son and he had rights over him as well...at that point P didn't care what he had to do to get Aarti and Ansh back and that was his downfall.

@Raveena: Precisely Dubeyji was hoping that Aarti and Prashant would get back together that day and he would have his family back under one roof but he didn't happened...but that didn't stop Dubey from hoping that things would change even when they found out that Aarti was pregnant with Yash's child, Dubey still wanted her to go back to P IMO he thought that Aarti could be P's savior 🤔

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anonee

@anonee

Sparkler

Posted: 12 years ago

#32

I am going to address an issue that has not been mentioned but was the defining factor in Aarti-Dupey (including P relationship). And that is:

Emotional Blackmail

The Dupeys psychosocial dynamics was built around emotional manipulation. Shobha and Sattu were masters in this form of negotiation and somehow at some time in their relation made it the modus operandi for family negotiation.

Prashant having been nurtured in that environment exhibited the typical psychological traits of self-centeredness, grasping attitude, verbal abuse, underhand scheming and most importantly playing one parent against another (including tai against parents) to get what he desired.

Enter Aarti:

Her orphan status had imbibed in her:

- an excessive need for approval and acceptance

- an intense fear of anger

- a need for peace at any price even at the cost of sacrificing her security and happiness

- a tendency to take too much responsibility for other people's lives OR an overpowering urge to set things right in another's life

- extremely poor self-confidence or should I say a high level of self doubt

Prashant never even fathomed the impact his family dynamics would have on her.

IMO Aarti felt the need to be that which Shobha and Sattu claimed Prashant never attempted to give them. In the process Shobha and Sattu perceived her as the child they always wanted and Prashant perceived her to be an usurper (some one who cheated him of his rightful place as the apple of his parents eye).

Prashant then did what all emotional blackmailers do to Aarti. But he was pitched against his parents in the battle and eventually he played his final card - find another woman, take up an independent residence (without parents), dump a pregnant Aarti, and abandon Ansh!

IMO Shobha and Sattu were driven to get Aarti remarried to get an emotional one-up on their son. Ofcourse, Ansh's need for a father also contributed its share. But the drive or the urge had its root in the 'emotional blackmail modus operandi'.

Sattu's claim that Aarti was a widow - was a lie of convenience palmed off by a desperate father.

Later as the wedding closed (mehndi ceremony) Prashant's call to Aarti appeared to Sattu as a victory of sorts in the emotional battle with his son. His son had caved in to the pressure he thought and so he was in favor of Aarti meeting P.

Of course I need not elaborate how Dupey blackmailed Aarti into keeping her divorcee status hidden from Yash.

IMO at this point Aarti sincerely felt she should be honest with Yash re: her divorcee status. After the wedding G3's intense dislike of her and Ansh set Aarti on a different mind track!

At every level of interaction the Dupeys and P have played their game of emotional blackmail with Aarti.

Samana: Regarding Prashant going to the hotel to retrieve his wedding picture with Aarti at Shobha's behest was (IMO) not because Prashant craved Shobha's approval.

IMO He did so because he wanted to retain his stranglehold on Yash and Aarti. As long as Yash was unaware that he (Prashant) was Aarti's ex-husband he had the upper edge in the relationship both with Aarti and Yash. His trysts with Ansh would have Aarti's tacit approval albeit reluctantly. Further Ansh's participation in the BMT procedures would be assured. He could continue to visit SM and gradually coerce Aarti into uncompromising situations which would ultimately get her thrown out of SM by G3 and SP.

However if the truth of his relationship to Aarti was divulged as far as Prashant was concerned all bets were off.

EDIT For those interested - there is a new fun post.

Palak on Ishita at https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/punar-vivah/3613835/palak-on-ishita-fun-post

Edited by anonee - 12 years ago

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Sadie

@..CountingStars

Stunner

+ 5

Posted: 12 years ago

#33

Retro Dori! Yipppeee

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Sadie

@..CountingStars

Stunner

+ 5

Posted: 12 years ago

#34

Originally posted by: Samanalyse
@Zet and Caller: Great discussions, but I don't think I can give as much credit to Shobha as you two do. She saw Prashant as she wanted or expected to see him, and not necessarily as he actually was. Sure, he did harbour the desire to get Aarti and Ansh back, but perhaps had Shobha understood the reason behind that desire, instead immediately labelling him a villain, she could have turned him around. Though Aarti had moved on from him, for Prashant it was as though he was just waking up to his mistake. For Prashant, wanting Aarti and Ansh back was more to erase his mistakes of the past and his bad decisions and remind himself of all the good decisions he had made, that is, marrying Aarti and fathering Ansh. It was Shobha's job to make him understand that he couldn't have Aarti back, but that didn't mean he couldn't have a happy life ahead of him with the love of his parents and maybe somewhere down the line, a good life partner of his very own, that he couldn't change the past, but he could make the future better... she just didn't do that, not until it was too late, anyway. That is why when Taiji came around, Prashant so easily fell for her words... because she was the first person he felt was truly on his side and not Aarti's.

I can never forget the way Prashant dutifully went to the hotel when Shobha realised that Yash had taken AP's wedding photo by mistake, to bring it back before it was too late. He did it because Shobha believed in him at that moment and trusted him to do right by Aarti and herself. When Prashant retrieved that picture, and overheard Aarti telling Yash the truth unknowingly, he didn't for a moment think about getting her back but was feeling terrible that she had possibly jeopardized her relationship with Yash unnecessarily.

I guess what I am trying to say is that Prashant was looking for some validation that he wasn't a terrible person and that he could change, validation from anywhere. Shobha's love and acceptance had the power to give him that validation, without Aarti and Ansh, but since she refused to even give him an inch of understanding, he went further and further on the wrong path, under the wrong guidance. The dream he had about Aarti and Yash shows that he knew what was going to happen in the end deep down. If only Shobha had taken the time to support him in his quest to come to terms with the fact that Aarti was never coming back, I do believe he would have realised the error of his ways on his own and moved on. After all, as long as he had Shobha's love, he was a total well-wisher for the Aarti-Yash relationship. These things go both ways, I guess.

Or maybe the CVs wanted to get rid of Prashant so that TRPs could return to them thus Shobha had to be a Zulmi Zaalim to Prashant despite not wanting to! 😉 🤣 🤣

I totally agree with you Btw! ^^

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caller123

@caller123

Trailblazer

+ 8

Posted: 12 years ago

#35

@Zetter I agree with you. I also can remeber the hotel incident. I can remember how Shobha tried to do a PV for Prashanth annd how he got angry over that. It was his nature he always did what he wanted. Eventhough he married Aarthi he wanted to live with another woman so he divorced Aarthi and went. And when he fall sick his redemption track started but when he saw he is out of danger he wanted Aarthi and Ansh back and he did every possible thing to get them back.😡 Even how hard shobha tried she coudn't stop him. If taiji was not there chances were there that he would listen to shobha. But Taiji manipulated him and he thought Aarthi and Ansh belonged to him only. He forgot what he did to them in the past. He forgot he left a pregnant wife when she most needed him.

@anonee Agree with you. Prashanth went to hotel not only because Shobha told him but for himself.

Edited by caller123 - 12 years ago

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Chitra_11

@Chitra_11

Rocker

Posted: 12 years ago

#36

Arti and Dubeys :

Any relationship whether blood or connected to blood relations is acceptance. This is what we saw in Mr and Mrs. Dubey. Arti being accepted as bahu simply because they loved their son and his choice and slowly the relationship turned into parents-daughter. Any parents teaching their loved ones - right and wrong - the definition is the same - but according to me - it is equally important how far the individual implements it. Any action depends so much on individual control of emotions, greed and principles.

Prashant had wonderful parents and he got attracted to the right girl in life but his emotions (attraction) and greed... took over when he fell for another girl and was blinded to materialistic things in life. What really hit him hard was when the disease took over these very same materialistic things and attraction refused to accept his reality. His goodness did come back to him after tasting the bitterness but when the bitterness was wiped out by his first wife and son...he did try to move to the right path set by his parents and his ex but then his Taiji set out a plan of greed which Prashant could no longer resist and that streak in him took over and that is the reason...I always say..even if you are surrounded by right people/atmosphere...it is the individual who brings out the character designed by them.

Arti though orphaned had the right principles and was lucky to get such in-laws. She saw a mother in Shobha and a father in Dubey. As parents they did their best to get a family for Arti and Ansh...though it was based on a lie...their goodness was...they cared for these two as their own. What followed later was Dubeyji's blind love for his son without thinking that his son didn't care for them all these years and it was only because of his weakness that he longed to have them. Sometimes when emotion rules...your mind stops working and this is what happened to Dubey. Arti who trusted her parents and acted on their action was simply because she was indebted to them but at the same time she managed to keep Yash and family happy and united even if it costed her a lot. The lie that was kept secret by her and Dubey did cause her lot of emotional problem but her ever forgiving nature and converting an issue into a non-issue was the SAVER of a lie that had turned into a huge ball...AND Yash was able to forgive her for the cause she did.

I conclude that in the journey of PV alongwith Arti and Dubeys...I have learnt is...when a lie is been delayed waiting for the right time...you never know how many lies you have to add for a single lie committed.

Love you for opening this thread 👏

Edited by chitsri65 - 12 years ago

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palbhar

@palbhar

Dazzler

Posted: 12 years ago

#37

Hi, many interesting posts on Aarti and the Dubeys...

Aarti-Shobha

One thing I appreciate Shobha is for uniting Aarti and Yash...if not for her insistence on the PV, Aarti would not have succumbed and we wouldn't have our beautiful Aarya!!!😛

Of course, I cannot deny the fact that this lady is one who is too idealistic...or should we say as one who feels her moral beliefs are the right way...Yes, she does have good moral ideals but she comes on too strong at times and this is something people with characteristics like Prashant will not be able to accept 😕...however it was interesting to see her deciding to keep mum about Aarti's divorce status...so she too did put away her principles just to make sure this marriage happens...yes she did voice her concern to Dubeyji but at that moment, Aarti getting married was more important to her!!!!

The only time I found her a tad irritating was when she emotionally blackmailed Aarti for Prashant's BMT😡😡😡...guess she felt guilty for all the curses she spewed on Prashant and just wanted him well!!!!

On the whole, she was quite a supportive MIL...some of her advice were spot-on (Palak's birthday plan)...so guess we have to accept the good and the bad!!!

Aarti-Dubey

He cared for her and he must have wanted her PV too as he was the one who stopped Shobha from telling Gayathri about Aarti's divorce status😊...in that way he was a supportive husband...also I do not blame him for allowing Aarti to go and see Prashant at the temple...it's true that if she didn't she would always be left wondering 'what if?'...

Can you blame him for keeping an ounce of hope that his son and DIL will reunite?!!! 😕No, of course not...it's natural as he would definitely want Ansh to be with them...letting them go was a big sacrifice...

I truly cannot blame him for dragging Aarti out of SM after Ansh's kidnapping...which father in his right mind would allow his daughter to stay on after all the nasty, cruel things they had said and did...😲

In fact, I was happy that Aarti still had their support even after marriage!!!!

It was just too bad that Dubey went bonkers after Prashant was killed...wish he hadn't but gues their role was over and so life goes on!!!!